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You’re a man now.

Where have we heard that before? Well you’re supposed to be one, so going forward, we’ll assume that you are. So maybe someone has had this conversation with you, maybe not. Maybe you just need to be reminded. Let’s talk about money.

1. SAVE, YOU I.DIOT PADAWAN – Your mother made you use a piggy bank as a kid, to try to get you into that habit. You’re all grown now, so goodbye mommy. Not so fast, Skywalker. You need to save. Consider saving as paying yourself a salary. Get a savings account with some decrepit bank (hint: United or Last) make sure you don’t collect a bank card (ATM card to you). Leave a standing instruction with your bank to forward an exact amount from your salary (say: 10%) to that account. Then and only then should you spend the rest.

2. BUDGET. THEN BALL ON THAT BUDGET — In fact, don’t ball at all. Only two reasons to “ball” for now. 1. If and when you meet your personal and financial targets 2. If the name on your birth certificate is spelled B-A-L-L-E-R-I-N-W-A or B-A-L-L-E-R-D-A-Y (No, Bolarinwa and Bolade don’t count. Neither does your Facebook). Live beneath your means, my friend. Don’t spend all you have at once. Draw up the things you need to get/buy/pay for. Allot priorities to them on a scale of 1 to 5. Now rearrange your list according to relevance. Deal with those needs with the money you’ve allotted.

3. HOLD BACK THAT ORG.ASM DELAY GRATIFICATION — In a world like we have today, where every one needs everything now. Holding out, doesn’t seem to be cool any longer. That car you’ve been eyeing? Get it now. Pay for it later (more on this next). No, mi hombre. Don’t do it. You can always get gratified later. Nobody wants to be a one minute man, then why be a one minute spender?

4. OWE NO ONE — OWE NOBODY. This rule is very simple really. But it’s the most difficult. Don’t take that car loan, that overdraft, don’t borrow against next month’s salary. There are exceptions to the don’t owe rule. But we will get to that at some other point on the road. Bottomline, don’t. Just don’t owe.

5. CREATE MULTIPLE STREAMS OF INCOME — I’ll tell you something your employer does not want you to know. You know that rule in relationships? The one who needs the other less, has the most power in any relationship. This rule applies across the board. You need the crumbs (or not) your employer gives you every month. It’s why you kiss ass, romance it even, and take all of that excrement with a smile on your face like you just scarfed down a tub of Ben & Jerry’s. Upset this dynamic, create other streams of income such that work is really just work; something you do to pass the days and because you enjoy it.

6. MAKING MONEY IS A GAME, LEARN THE RULES AND PLAY IT WELL — Some people will tell you that spending money you’ve earned is the best thing in the world. It’s a lie. They are lying to you. It’s the most emotional thing ever. That process… oh that process of a hundred grand become hundred bucks is one of the most emotionally draining experiences in this world. It can bring tears to a man’s eyes. Rumor has it that I’ve made icebergs from those tears, in my day. I’ll tell you what’s beautiful: making money. I’ll tell you what’s even much more beautiful —> Watching the money you’ve made, make more money for you. Oh mahn, it’s an incredibly orgasmic experience. I can assure you, you’ll instantly get hard-ons every time you check your account balance.

Make it rain, young padawan… in your savings account.

WS

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Aw can I be involved in somtin like this? Am interested.