rottenegg: @op- I'm not sure i understand what you want. . . advice or support? @mr cork- Lmao!

-Mr Cork-:
...Mr Cork<<<<<< 17inches! (hard)

caramel007: I'm sorry it looking like an epistle but I implore u to please make out time to read it..

When I asked why he called off the relationship or rather, why he stopped calling, this is what he told me...

Back then in school because he was working in lagos while I schooled in ibadan, he usually comes in most weekends. There was this particular time he came to ibadan for a wedding with hs friends. Apparently his friends wanted to hang out after the wedding so I went with a coule of my friends. According to him, while we were there, he met a younger brothere to his friend who asked him what he was doing there with 'thse girls' referring to me and my friends. He said the guy told him that we were call girls. He now said he doesn't really know them that its just his babe (pointing to me). He now asked me if I knew the guy and I replied that he s one of those guys that jumps about on campus. That info got him worried. When he was leaving for lagos the next morning, he was meant to give me some money and that when he said he was going to send it into my acccount later and I flared, that if further confirmed what the guy told him earlier. He couldn't get the thot off his mind and that was why he decided to call it off my calling less and less.
He now met this guy about a year later and brought up the topic again to ask him about what he said earlier. He showed the guy my pics from my facebbok pictures and theguy said that he doesn't know me that this wasn't who he was talking about...he felt so mad and said he reported the guy to his elder brother...
The issue now is, he wants my forgiveness which I told him he already has cos I ve moved on.

He and his wife are divorced and he planning for us to get back together but I just don't have the hots for him anymore.
But it is also very hard listening to his voice and not remembering the good times we shared..

I don't want to see him. I want to pinish him for hurting me the way he did but its so hard...

caramel007: @ kntrovasial mi: it wasn't me, they had issues even before I started dating him.

caramel007: While growing up, I have always vowed not to ever date a married man until this guy came and swept me off my feet.
Because I had already fallen in ove wit him, it didn't make much difference when I found out he was married. We had a beautiful relationship despite this fact but deep down I always felt concerned about his marriage. This is because as bad it was that we were having an affair, I didn't want it to ever affect his marriage as I usually advice him whenever he is having issues with his wife.
I tried every means to break up this relationship as I wasn't feeling too comfortable and besides I wasn't getting any younger but it was so hard cos I was so much in love with him. The relationship packed up after about 2years as phones became less and I lost my dad around that time. I was hurt, I felt let down and dissappointed but I moved on.
About a year ago, he started calling me but I never picked his calls, I never wanted to have anything to do wit him cos he hurt me so badly. We had fun, did a lot of crazy things together, with him I was myself, we would play, I cld jump on him, it was crazy. I even broke up a relationship because of him( that was stupid)
Anyways back to the present, since he d been trying to call me, I decided to call him to find out why he d been bugging my phone and to tell him to stop bugging my phone. He revealed that his conscience has been pricking him, siad he knew he has offended me and wanted forgiveness.
Well, to cut the long story short, when he said he wanted to see me, I told him that I don't ever want to see me and that he should say whatever he wants via the phone...

carzola: I hate girls who dnt hv a strong will.. A man dumps u coz of mere sepculatns, shame on u 4 datin a marid man wat if ur d cause of their faild mariage God wud dfinatly punish u, wat hv u bin doin 4d past 1yr dnt u hv a new guy? U should move on nd advice him 2go nd get his wife back, der gud guy out der u.. Nd plss ask God 2 4gv u ur an adultrer.. Sowie 2say but is d truth.

4words: I want to disagree with this saying "if he cheat with you, he will also cheat on you", its not always like that. Its obvious you love this dude and you'v not been able to replace him, his divorce with his wife has nothing to do with you, probably they were never meant to be. Because I believe if the guy had come to nairaland with his matrimonial problems and the mistake he made by getting married to his wife, we would still be the one advising him to get a divorce (though I am not in support of the fact that he cheated on his wife, he should have gotten the divorce before he started dating you)... A divorced person has every right to seek love and compatibility where he/she finds it. This being said;

Since your feelings still runs, I will advise that you should be very careful with the relationship he is asking for, ask him to spell out exactly what he wants from you, spell out what you want from him, if agreed fine, if not, my dear stay clear him.

In my own 4words "only live but once"

D_BestDoc:

How do you know if two people are meant to be together?so in your opinion marriage is now a trial and error game.Did he have to wait until marriage to know if they were meant to be together? Spending his money on small university undergraduates,one can never expect a man with such irresponsible style to succeed in marriage.

4words: Some times, when you are caught in the web you did be confused. The Op might be the victim you know? If at all there any to blame wholly it should be the lying, cunny man who deceived the op into believing he is single. Many gurl out there are still falling victim of this cunny men.
We should watch the way we bash the op cos people with same is might not want to come out because of the way we are insulting her

ogugua88:

Is she still the victim when she finds out he's married and chooses to continue loving and sleeping with him? She wasn't under a spell. She made conscious choices. She and the married man share fault.

4words: Have you heard of psychological and emotional prisoner or hypnosis.
Believe me, when it comes to love, we would do stupid things... Just pray your not in that position.