Who is a saint?

Well, as much as it’s not easy to admit, it’s harder denying it. But, I can assure you it’s due to the sensitive and a heartfelt person that I am. Not until now, I do believe that men don’t cry. I wonder why I’m realizing it now or have I always been like that? What exactly has happened to me? I do not only cry to unimportant things, sometimes, I find my eyes uncontrollably, filled with tears. When I try to analyze those uninvited tears, I discovered some reasons behind them. Whenever I’m overjoyed, I see tears, I see tears when I feel sad or see people experience sad things. What actually is my business with people who experience sad things? I can’t just stand it. Can I still be called a man?

Some thoughts will just never go, regardless of your best efforts to relieve the mind off them. Like nocturnal visitors, who come into the house unbidden, armed to the teeth and make you indulge them, such thoughts hold your mind captive. They follow you wherever you go. At nights, they steal your sleep. I carry such burdens on my young mind and I like to share one of them with you. I hope you will find it interesting.

It has gotten to a stage that even my friends laugh at me but, who cares as long as I’m able to satisfy my emotions. Am I supposed to act like a so- called man when I lost a loved one? I absolutely can’t. The birth of my son was another moving story in my life. You won’t believe that I even weep at the cinema whenever I watch tragic movies. Hmmm! The level of suffering and poverty of people I see everyday around the world, I can’t stand it. I personally attribute the suffering of people to political selfishness of our leaders and their endless greed. Religious crisis is not exempted.

A million and one questions going on at the same time and I find myself seeking for answers .Most times in order not to worry so much , I have learnt to accept some of them and just believe its fate or how things are meant to be. My heart is heavy most times , I try to live to the best of my believes and by my faith .Not wanting to ask too many questions , worry or think so much but I still find myself doing just that.

As a person, I am God fearing to the core,and am from a christain family but I find it difficult to obey all his commandments . Nevertheless, I’m only human. I even find it hard to direct some questions to God because of the guilt of not obeying his words but, is that completely necessary? What if I’m not a Christian, will I be judged? This is where my question arose from. I ask myself, what if I was born into a Muslim family? The kind of practicing Muslim family. What if I grew up knowing only Allah and reading nothing but the Quran? If I never had access to publicity and never heard about Christianity and I died on the run? What then is the fate of my soul? You may also view it the other way round.

I am not trying to start a religious war here, just writing as it comes to my mind. Now, I try not to dwell on such questions but spend more time doing what I believe in and the way I was also brought up. I still keep asking if I am giving excuses or maybe deep down, I truly want to know the answer. Is it right for me to think this way or am I sinning knowing that as a Christian I shouldn’t nurture such thoughts? My intention to contribute to helping the world is giving me the courage to take the risk. Sin? God knows best.

About four years ago, precisely on the 25th of December, 2009, the whole world woke up to the sad tale of Umar Farouk Abdulmuttalab, a 24-year-old Nigerian who attempted to blow up a plane in America. He failed and was arrested and charged with terrorist activities. It was said then that as a young boy of 17years, he had been recruited and indoctrinated by a terrorist group in Yemen before being sent to perform the despicable act in the United States.

I pondered long and hard over the incident at the time and was eventually compelled to somehow, make some justifications for his action. I thought of the inveigling and the damage to his innocent mind. I wondered then, whether many of the people condemning him would not have done the same under his circumstance.
Presently, the wanton destruction of lives across the globe on religious grounds has not ceased to baffle me. As usual, I have tried to find an explanation for such acts. I think the solution is obvious. I want us to have it at the back of our mind that regardless of the religion you practice, your character and attitude towards others determines what become of you . That’s my thought anyway.

There should never be a justification for religious crises. The logic is simple: we are not responsible for our religious inclinations. Ninety-two percent of people did not choose their own religion, they had it thrust on them by their parents or guardian or the society where they were bred. Only about five percent of adults practice a religion different from that into which they were raised and three percent have no religion at all. So what justification can there be for molesting another person for practicing his own religious belief? Should a man be hated for being short or ugly or black? Certainly not. Philosophers say the mind of a child is like a clean slate at birth (tabular rasa). Whatever is inscribed on it stays for life. Some things are bigger than us, religion is one of them. How can we foster unity among people of different religious inclinations?

As we grow older, we get to make our choices in life as we come across them. Only if we are fortunate to come across them.I urge people that has intention of making good impact on human race to see this write up as a piece from the good heart of a humble soul.

Feel free to contribute to this in various ways with tangible points to enlighten people.
Let me just include that I stand corrected anytime and would be nice to share your honest opinion about the topic!

Iyanda