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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / The Right Decision? (2389 Views)
I Don't Want To Regret My Decision And Miss Out On What Is For Me. Pls Advice / Did He Make The Right Decision By Breaking Up With Her / May Be Its The Right Decision To Remain Single. What Do U Think (2) (3) (4)
The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:10am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Today i was on one of the other threads you know commenting on my beliefs. then all the sudden my boyfriend walks through the door all mad. He imediatley took some of his anger on me. he told me he was tired of me being on this site all the freaking time and i needed to delete. so knowing him as long as i do, i just did what i was told. usually i would have snapped back but i knew he was really stressed. So i started a new one when he came back to me stating that i could go back to my old one. Im so tired of his moodiness. i understand that he is under alot of pressure but it seems like im the punching bag for his anger. not literally. so even though i knew he was mad i told him that i wanted a break from the relationship. he looked at me and just walked out the door. i have tried calling him but he turned his phone off. Then his sister called me telling me that she has never seen him this angry. So im asking you guys for you help since i consider you guys as family for your help. usually i have things in control but im seriously afraid that i have probably lost him. so since most of you are more experienced in relationships then me, would you please help to find a way to get him back?? i really couldnt imagine him not in my life. |
Re: The Right Decision? by StephenP(m): 12:13am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Maybe it's his time of the month. lol Anyway, I'm done with all your posts about your boyfriend and stuff. Seriously, I am. |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:14am On Jun 17, 2008 |
your boyfriend needs to grow up goshhhhhhh,he is so imature ,what r u doing wt that kind of person anyway?can't imagine myself dating a kid,that is stupid |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:16am On Jun 17, 2008 |
honestly onyinye u and ur boyfriend are kids dat needs to grow up and have a little sense im tired of dis boyfriend wahala |
Re: The Right Decision? by chika98: 12:16am On Jun 17, 2008 |
You need to buy him a tampon. he needs to chill out |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:16am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Oyinye, darling, when a man takes his anger up on you, he's not a real man. . . dnt it take up with it plz. . . |
Re: The Right Decision? by TOH(f): 12:16am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Im like so bored with this whole shit and i just started reading your threads/posts why say you wanna break then go back to begging. im confused. |
Re: The Right Decision? by gabelogan(m): 12:20am On Jun 17, 2008 |
ONYINYE I BEEN THINK SEY NA YOU KNOW PASS, WITH ALL THOSE UR SMART ASS COMMENTS AND HOLIER-THAN-THOU POSTURING. SO U CAN BE A SOFTIE, SO U ARE HUMAN AFTERALL?? |
Re: The Right Decision? by Uche2nna(m): 12:21am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Nairaland is now what? A dating school? |
Re: The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:23am On Jun 17, 2008 |
he is under alot of pressure right now. he has two jobs, takes care of his mom and has track practice. so he is a man. but i just get tired of him taking his anger on me sometimes. but i dont want him to leave still. i love him. and he is all i want. |
Re: The Right Decision? by TOH(f): 12:24am On Jun 17, 2008 |
then why did you say what you said? |
Re: The Right Decision? by StephenP(m): 12:25am On Jun 17, 2008 |
onyinye2: So. . .why the hell did you break up with him? Why am I asking? It ain't like I'm interested. |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:26am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Hmmmm. . .how old is he? |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:29am On Jun 17, 2008 |
15 yrs i guess hiss |
Re: The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:29am On Jun 17, 2008 |
TOH: you see i know you guys are dog tired of hearing all my bf problems and such. but he means alot to me. he has always been there for me so of course im going to talk about him all the time. but his only fault is his biggest problem. he does have a temper. and that collides with my controlling independent self. and i couldnt take it any more so i wanted a break. not a complete separation. so that is why i asked you guys for your help because Jenny you are right, we are pretty much are kids and i need you guys adult advice. |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:31am On Jun 17, 2008 |
jennykadry:LOL!! |
Re: The Right Decision? by TOH(f): 12:31am On Jun 17, 2008 |
To most people a break and break UP is the same thing. The normal thing to do is INSTEAD olf asking for a break, you literally get time away from him on your own |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:32am On Jun 17, 2008 |
ok u want our advise ,we will give it to u how old r u and how old is d boy? |
Re: The Right Decision? by acidrop(f): 12:33am On Jun 17, 2008 |
lol boyfriend issues StephenP:are u sure? |
Re: The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:34am On Jun 17, 2008 |
jennykadry: He is 22 going on 23. im 21 going on 22 |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:34am On Jun 17, 2008 |
acidrop:acid, where did u pop out from na? |
Re: The Right Decision? by acidrop(f): 12:35am On Jun 17, 2008 |
4Her:i jst dey get up from bed jare. una Goodmorning oooo |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:36am On Jun 17, 2008 |
acidrop:lol. . .good evening to you too sha |
Re: The Right Decision? by debosky(m): 12:37am On Jun 17, 2008 |
It wasn't very wise of you asking for a break the moment he was pissed about something, it seems very vindictive or you trying to punish him/revenge for being angry at you. Whenever you want to discuss serious issues about the relationship, always wait till both parties are in a reasonably calm/receptive frame of mind so things are not taken poorly. Right now you're probably compounding the problems he has to deal with and instead of being supportive, you've added yourself to the list of problems. I think TOH was right in saying taking a vacation away from him such as going on a road trip with your girls or something would be better, instead of this 'take a break' thing - it rarely works. If the dude has a temper, you do not talk to him in the midst of that, he probably is too mad then to comprehend. Wait till he's calm and then try to talk again. Considering he is having problems, you need to be supportive as much as you can - when you can't, bite your tongue so you don't worsen things. |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:39am On Jun 17, 2008 |
ok honestly i like u onyinye,seriously i do, but sometimes maturity goes a long way,when i was your age God knows i was nt acting like this sit him down and talk some sense into him,make sure d sense gets into his medula(brains)even if u have to knock his head for it to enter,a man cannot just shout at u like dat as if u r d cause of his frustrations or watever,breaking up wt him wasnt d right thing though,but u would have talked some sense into his skull don't tell me you're already acting like a wife?sometimes uve got to be stubborn and rude when necessary,God knows that im very stubborn and don't take any shit from anybody not even from my husband,theres a time to respect a man,and there is a time to stand on your ground especially when it has to do with your emotional life,onyinye d earlier u twist that guys head correctly and not make him feel that hes doing u a favour by dating u,the better for u |
Re: The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:41am On Jun 17, 2008 |
@debosky i get your point in some sense. i know i shouldnt have asked for a break at the midst of the moment but i just couldnt take it any more. it seemed like i was having to hold my tongue all the time with him. which of course you guys know isnt me. I know im always quick in the mouth but i just couldnt take it any more. it is not like he is the only one who has problems. |
Re: The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:45am On Jun 17, 2008 |
@Jenny i guess you are right. i guess the whole thing was my fault. he is a great guy and i should be more understanding. man i dont even think i deserve a man like him the way i have been acting. i wouldnt be surprised if he doesnt take me back. |
Re: The Right Decision? by debosky(m): 12:46am On Jun 17, 2008 |
Its ok to be quick in the mouth, but you must learn to tame that too so it doesn't do more harm than good. Like I said, talking to him when he can take in what you're saying is the best - right now he probably thinks you are hurting him in return, which does no one any good. Yes you have emotional needs and all that, and he's not the only one with problems, but since you are the mature one able to see this then handle it maturely. Flying off the handle rarely ever helps - he needs to know that he cannot offload his anger on you each time, and you need to know you can't always say what you think. . .like my pastor said y'day, 'button that lip and think a little more'. I guess he needs to calm down first then you can talk about it rationally. Now don't go thinking it was all your fault, he was wrong in getting mad at you unreasonably, but you erred too by responding angrily - you were both wrong and both need to accept that and work on your individual failings. |
Re: The Right Decision? by Nobody: 12:46am On Jun 17, 2008 |
is he d one on ur profile onyinye? |
Re: The Right Decision? by StephenP(m): 12:48am On Jun 17, 2008 |
jennykadry: Nah. . . that's Kanye. |
Re: The Right Decision? by acidrop(f): 12:50am On Jun 17, 2008 |
jennykadry:haaaaaaaaaaa, how can u ask that kind of question GHENNNNNNNNNNNNYYYYY |
Re: The Right Decision? by onyinye2(f): 12:54am On Jun 17, 2008 |
@ jenny naw, that is kanye west @debosky easier said then done. he is not going to hear me out. and we are both too uptight to apologize. but seriously it is mostly my fault. this wouldnt have happened if i just let my ego down and let him throw his little fit. but like i get stressed too and i dont go around showing it. i have alot on my plate too. i got have a job, track practice, basketball practice, and i have to take care of my brother who is autistic. but i dont go around yelling at him. |
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