my name is blakes,am a nigerian and a graduate of civil engineering,on my first visit to abuja for my nysc service,i met this damsel,and i liked her without cautioning myself,just like every other guy,i asked her out and she accepted with immeasurable love in her eyes and with hope and love in my eyes i knw we are going to last for a very longtym because she has a beautiful heart and looked virteous,atleast so i thought until i decided to ask her of her past,at first i wasnt expecting anytin ugly to come from her,until she began to speak of her own past.i cudnt help but to be dissappointed when she said i am the 9th man she is dating and she has a son of five years.not to mention that she was once a smoker and has lived and was still lving a very rough life until she met me,and knowing that i deserve better,all she want to do is live a good life for me cus i hv shown her that she can be a better person again.but me,i am confuse and scared not to mention the too many ideas on my mind.so please folks,after hearing all this,should i call it a quit and end the relationship? cos am losing my mind over it.

pls ur advise is needed desperately.

.c me c question...nairaland,land for junks...u tell me or ask when u start am...why askin me if 2 end...grow up...SON

she told u that cos she's repentant... if she told a lie u wouldn't know either.
u might just be the change she needs in life... but if u can't bear it... exit on fair terms.

Grow up SON...your past is ur past...present is present...if God looked at Saul' past Paul wodn?t av done wonders..

I tink telin U of her past lyf is d bst she did, because it wld hv bin sumtin awful if U discover it Ursef... Jst let d past b d past & Liv 4 d future

The sincerity is commendable. How I wish I could meet someone like her. If she is the kinda woman you ll want to be with, I see no harm in giving het a chance. From the little I know women like her usually make great partners once they make up their mind to change their randy ways. But being with her would require deep maturity,understanding and support from you. which you are clearly not cut out for.

@op!wen u dey touchy touchy her bubu?u no ask question!
No be u read engineering applied math graduat?ehe! so na wetin she talk we mak u turn olodo just now,just now?
Abeg as an engineer
SOLVE
THIS
UR
LUV
CALCULATION!

Seriously , that girl that is about to change her ways for a committed relationship needs a mature and responsible man .
I use to believe graduates were people found worthy in character.

If you leave this woman you may meet someone worse who will paint herself as a saint. The grass is never greener on the other side dude. Its the now that matters, not her past. Besides, I don't think you are a saint yourself

man if she reali loves you what else matters?

You don't have to stay with her if you're not happy with the things she shared with you. There will be another man out there who'll be much more deserving of her. You are clearly not him, so move along.

hmmmmm, personally I really admire that lady.

Ladies can keep secrets and if she never told u, u wouldnt have know-shows she is commited o be a better person and cos she has see de goood, de bad, the ugly, she knows what to do to have the best of relationships and make yu happi.

i wish you de best but i THINK YOU JUST MET SOME GREAT LADY, support her and be happy but if you wanna leave, yu re free but she will not e open to any other man again cos she wouldnt wanna loose another man she would love.

Dude, move on.

I agree with addictiv's advice save for his comment on you not being mature enough. She was honest, that's commendable, give her a chance. Note she might have flaws as anyone but it shouldn't be groinds to leave her except they are very telling ones. Peace.

ITbomb: Seriously , that girl that is about to change her ways for a committed relationship needs a mature and responsible man .
I use to believe graduates were people found worthy in character.

Wait until you become a graduate. I think the poster is mature enough asking for random advice on this forum. Sadly bigots like you are not responsible or mature enough to lend a helping hand.

grandlexuz:

Wait until you become a graduate. I think the poster is mature enough asking for random advice on this forum. Sadly bigots like you are not responsible or mature enough to lend a helping hand.

wait i'm coming!looking 4 harbosede & aunty cc dictionary!
Chai see BOMB!
Make i dodge o!

Guy if you love her go on if not take a walk One of my hostel girl is an ardent addict of cannabis i mean marijuana yet i think she is the most respectful and matured girl in my hostel.

Yield: You don't have to stay with her if you're not happy with the things she shared with you. There will be another man out there who'll be much more deserving of her. You are clearly not him, so move along.

You've said it all.

Johnny boy, she is not the right one for you, end the relationship ASAP. It's well. *I did not say this because I think there is something wrong with this girl, It's just that I'm worried about you *

You already fell in love and presently you are disappointed because she opened up about her reality. This is why i advocate for men to withhold emotions before plunging into relationships. Forget about people saying everyone has a past and so you should settle for this. I don't believe in people dropping an addictive habit because they met a new guy or girl. I believe its always safer to accept people the way you met them not hoping for changes later .What if this girl reverts back to smoking after you marry her? Don't forget that smoking can be addictive all she needs is one crisis in her life to trigger it.

What can you do? You either take a long time to court her and see if those habits are truly gone. Alternatively, if you find what she has told you to be too heavy you should leave her alone. Whatever you decide, don't ever judge this girl or go hard on her, she showed maturity by opening up about her past quite early but that is not enough reason to marry her. Being open is just one of the good signs a woman should show.

Forget those telling you whether the next girl will be worse,leave that matter till the future, in Christ's words "Tommorrow will take care of itself". Boy,what you cant live with is what you cant live with. Is someone listening?

D devil u know is beta dan d Angel u do not know.u might 4rm frying pan enta into fire.

marymarcel009: D devil u know is beta dan d Angel u do not know.u might 4rm frying pan enta into fire.

Same defeatist mentality that makes some women to stick with abusive husbands until they are beaten to death. Stop telling the OP this rubbish.

O.p,you really don‘t have to care who she was,what she has done in the past.As long as she love you and you feel same for her too,that‘s the fact.Move on with her.In life,we have many types of friend or rather we have saviours.What do i mean?It is because you are her friend that made her to stop her bad behaviour,which means you are worth her love and you have turned her life from ugly to good. Not all women will be sincere enough to tell you their ugly past but she did cause she has found true love,and don‘t abuse the love,trust and faith she has built in you. Move on with her,with time you will get over the shock.

This might actually be a Test, (ladies love to carry out some crazy tests) to see if you truely love her unconditionally or if you'll be there for her when it all falls down......all in all bro, anyway you follow na way oo. Wish you luck.