People experience different kind of things in life at every stage and I am not an exception.

I used to know this woman around my work place, from all indications she liked me and even showed it anytime I great her. But to my surprise she liked me to the extent that she wished me for her son, can you believe that! Hmmmm, then on this faithful day, I got a call from someone, he introduced himself, he sounded so familiar as if we have known each other for long. To cut a long story short, we started chatting and I really enjoyed chatting with him anyway. Later I had to come out and asked him how he knew me, he tried to cover up a little but I was able to make him speak. Then he told me his mum knows me very well and he got my contact from her. I was like . I told him ok o no qualms. So we became friends. I never imagined what he really wanted from me. But later on he was getting too close and too serious. He calls me so often, more than a friend will. I got tired at point and so don't pick his calls. Then later, his mum started ignoring me at times I will want to great her but she will just move away and tried avoiding talking to me. Has she now become my enemy or what?

I'm assuming you're female - and a very young one at that, based on your actions.

You know, when in a relationship with someone, even if it's casual, it's good to be courteous to the other party, no matter what you feel or think about them. To do otherwise will tell poorly on you.

Obviously, (from what you've written here), his mother liked you as a person - hence her introducing you to her son - nothing wrong with that. Perhaps, she saw you as good enough to be her daughter in law, meaning you must have made quite an impression on her - again, nothing wrong with that. Infact, it's not uncommon for mothers to act as 'matchmakers' for their sons if they see a girl they think will do well as a suitable spouse for their son.

Where you went wrong was ignoring and not acknowledging his calls. That was rude of you. If you aren't interested in someone, at least give them that respect to let them know how you feel. Since you both were friends, you should have let him know that you don't see him as anything else other than a friend and you'd like to keep it that way. You should have let him know in very clear terms that him wanting for a much deeper relationship with you wouldn't lead anywhere as you weren't interested.

If he had persisted with his calls after you'd let him know how you felt, then you'd be excused for ignoring his calls / not picking them up. Problem is, you didn't do that. My guess is that he must have mentioned this to his mum hence her coldness towards you.

My suggestion: Find the time to apologise to him about what you've done, then, let him know that you don't want anything more than plain friendship from him. Hopefully, that'll ease the tension between you both and between you and his mother and before long, things should go back to how they were (hopefully!)

P.S: Wait o! I've read a lot about the average Naija girl's conduct towards guys interested in them on threads here. Did this guy spend money on you while dating??!! If yes, did you lead him on deliberately, making him spend on you, knowing it won't lead anywhere? If the answer to both my questions is yes, then you should understand his annoyance and I'll blame you twice for it then. If you can, better refund his money back, pronto!

Nooo! you both are best friends. She gave her son your number hoping you both will hit things off, though that didn't happen. her actions are wrong, and she should have asked you why you stopped picking her Son's calls, you are also wrong too, you shouldn't have treated her son that way by ignoring his calls, you should have confirmed what he wanted from you and then told him you weren't interested. You could pick his calls and never call him back, and the man will be smart enough to know that you aren't interested. What you should do now, is to go and explain things to her, in a matured manner.

Efemena_xy: I'm assuming you're female - and a very young one at that, based on your actions.

You know, when in a relationship with someone, even if it's casual, it's good to be courteous to the other party, no matter what you feel or think about them. To do otherwise will tell poorly on you.

Obviously, (from what you've written here), his mother liked you as a person - hence her introducing you to her son - nothing wrong with that. Perhaps, she saw you as good enough to be her daughter in law, meaning you must have made quite an impression on her - again, nothing wrong with that. Infact, it's not uncommon for mothers to act as 'matchmakers' for their sons if they see a girl they think will do well as a suitable spouse for their son.

Where you went wrong was ignoring and not acknowledging his calls. That was rude of you. If you aren't interested in someone, at least give them that respect to let them know how you feel. Since you both were friends, you should have let him know that you don't see him as anything else other than a friend and you'd like to keep it that way. You should have let him know in very clear terms that him wanting for a much deeper relationship with you wouldn't lead anywhere as you weren't interested.

If he had persisted with his calls after you'd let him know how you felt, then you'd be excused for ignoring his calls / not picking them up. Problem is, you didn't do that. My guess is that he must have mentioned this to his mum hence her coldness towards you.

My suggestion: Find the time to apologise to him about what you've done, then, let him know that you don't want anything more than plain friendship from him. Hopefully, that'll ease the tension between you both and between you and his mother and before long, things should go back to how they were (hopefully!)

P.S: Wait o! I've read a lot about the average Naija girl's conduct towards guys interested in them on threads here. Did this guy spend money on you while dating??!! If yes, did you lead him on deliberately, making him spend on you, knowing it won't lead anywhere? If the answer to both my questions is yes, then you should understand his annoyance and I'll blame you twice for it then. If you can, better refund his money back, pronto!

I agree with you to some extent that I acted immature. Though I gave him some signs by never calling him but always pick his calls. But men can be funny at times, they will pretend they dont know what you are trying to tell them. They always want you to say things bluntly. As regard if he has spent money on me; NO, he has not spent a dime on me and I have never requested for any favour from him.

Barka.ng:

I agree with you to some extent that I acted immature. Though I gave him some signs by never calling him but always pick his calls. But men can be funny at times, they will pretend they dont know what you are trying to tell them. They always want you to say things bluntly. As regard if he has spent money on me; NO, he has not spent a dime on me and I have never requested for any favour from him.

Re the bolded: then you're okay.

Yes, some men can be persistent

Anyway, apologise to him and let him know you aren't interested in anything other than platonic friendship between you both. And if his mother's reaction bothers you that much, why not call her aside one afternoon, say during your lunch break and try to talk to her? She won't bite but methinks she's disappointed (understandably) - but don't let that cause a rift between you both.

If she opens up and the reason behind her frostiness towards you is because of her son, then explain to her that you're just not interested. Afterall, nor be by force na. Just make sure that when talking to her, address her with the respect she deserves....

You'll be fine sha - not to worry.