well i tried to do what a man just had to do. i asked her out today and the responce was that she saw me like a brother blah blah blah.
well she is still here with me as i am typing this but sje doesnt know what iam doing on my laptop.

will our friendship ever still be the same it was in the past?

WELL AT LEAST I MADE AN ATTEMPT

Sorry charlie, but your relationship won't be exactly the same. It will be sort of strange and awkward. I mean her knowing that you have feelings for her, puts a damper on your friendship. It is like you can't really be yourselves around eachother. Trust me i know.

LMAO.

She will be weary around you now!
I suggest you just leave it.  No means no.
Plenty more fish in the sea

For me it would be the same.  I have a best friend that asked me out about a year ago.  I told him the same thing I saw him as a brother and just could not cross those lines with him and nothing has changed for me.

We still see each other all the time and before I got married he still came over and slept in my bed right next me.  We still hang out.  He still drives to my house, about and hour from his now, and stays the night in the living room.

He will always be my best friend, even knowing that he wanted to date me did not change that friendship for me.  We have been friends for 15 years.

Well sistawoman, i couldn't be you. When a friend of mine tells me they feel as more than a friend, I'm OUT. because in the back of my mind im going to think about how this dude is really feelin' me.

sistawoman:

For me it would be the same.  I have a best friend that asked me out about a year ago.  I told him the same thing I saw him as a brother and just could not cross those lines with him and nothing has changed for me.

We still see each other all the time and before I got married he still came over and slept in my bed right next me.  We still hang out.  He still drives to my house, about and hour from his now, and stays the night in the living room.

He will always be my best friend, even knowing that he wanted to date me did not change that friendship for me.  We have been friends for 15 years.

Mmmmmmm, Ok

is such a thing impossible in your village, uche?

KarmaMod:

is such a thing impossible in your village, uche?

Shattapppppp!!!!!!

I think it depends on the man. And the situation is more tricky given the fact that the man has some feelings towrds the lady.

I would just sleep on the couch. Thanks but no thanks.

you both can still be friends but there would be an awkward feeling between the both of you.
I bet it would hurt you if she starts dating some other dude? Maybe you should start dating someone quickly and see how she responds might be interesting

Uche2nna:

Mmmmmmm, Ok

Whats whats wrong with that?

He has always had a key to my place.  He has always been welcome in my home.  He is one of two friends that I have that does not need to call to come over all he has to do is show up.  

Before I moved an hour away he was the one that would stop past the house to check on the kids while i worked or pick them up when they were sick.  He has been a shoulder to cry on and someone to celebrate the good times in my life.  He has been my grounding stick and my best friend thru thick and thin.  We have both had times in our relationship where our S/O's wanted us to cut the relationship and neither one of us was willing to do so.  I even had someone try to threaten to end the relationship with me cuz i would not cut Rob loose.  I told the dude you walk away if you want but Rob has been here for 15 years and I aint throwing that away.

So for him to come to my house, before i was married, drunk as hell or sober and climb in the bed next to me was nothing it was like my brother laying down beside me.  He never once tried to have sex with me or touch me, even thou i sleep in the buff.  He would just grab the blanket off the bottom of the bed and sleep away till the morning.

don't you just love it when people turn a topic into their own life story? ah!

@post
well it may affect the friendship, she may become distant for fear of encouraging you. Well if you don't feel so strongly about her i'd say lay off and just be friends

@Poster don't feel discouraged it happens most/all the time but the good news is that you found out on time the way she takes. My advice is don't push further according to you you have made an attempt. If she comes back and said she was kidding don't take her serious

powderPink:

don't you just love it when people turn a topic into their own life story? ah!

Yes i do, dont you. I prefer to learn from someonelse mistake then experience it myself.

Or are we limited to two sentences or less?

naah, its never gonna be the same. perhaps she was a bit loose around you, now she gonna be uptight arond.

e,g BEFORE - she dresses up while your there

NOW - your'LL be out-side her house while shes dressing up.

From your earlier story you said you are best friends but she wants more.
You shot yourself in the foot.  You'll be fine though.

sistawoman:

Whats whats wrong with that?

He has always had a key to my place.  He has always been welcome in my home.  He is one of two friends that I have that does not need to call to come over all he has to do is show up.

Are you serious!!!!!!! Dude get a key to house.  Gurlie you playing with fire and trying to calm it with gasoline.

sistawoman:

Before I moved an hour away he was the one that would stop past the house to check on the kids while i worked or pick them up when they were sick.  He has been a shoulder to cry on and someone to celebrate the good times in my life.  He has been my grounding stick and my best friend through thick and thin.  We have both had times in our relationship where our S/O's wanted us to cut the relationship and neither one of us was willing to do so.  I even had someone try to threaten to end the relationship with me because i would not cut Rob loose.  I told the dude you walk away if you want but Rob has been here for 15 years and I aint throwing that away.

Oka out of all my friends, 80% are male. And i have known them my whole life. but i don't treat them the way you treating baby boy over here.

sistawoman:

So for him to come to my house, before i was married, drunk as hell or sober and climb in the bed next to me was nothing it was like my brother laying down beside me.  He never once tried to have sex with me or touch me, even thou i sleep in the buff.  He would just grab the blanket off the bottom of the bed and sleep away till the morning.

Hell naw. i known my friends since i was two. They are my partna'z in crime, but there is no way in hell i will allow them to climb in the bed with me. I can't even allow my boyfriend to climb in the bed with me.

mission acomplished. now you got the attention and the topic is long forgotten . RESULT!

onyinye2:

They are my partna'z in crime, but there is no way in hell i will allow them to climb in the bed with me. I can't even allow my boyfriend to climb in the bed with me.

iwe

thanks folks i relly appreciate it all ur advice.
why dont ladies ever accept they have feelings for a guy (anyway it is cool) at least they believe they shouldnt look cheap.
she just left now and we still related and yabbed each other like we used to.
i will make myself more unavailable 9as i only ten to create time just for her, bcus she demands for my attention0.

anyway i will look for someone  else. I DEY FIND WIFE NOT GIRLFRIEND.
JUST WORRIED AND SICK,

WHY DID SEUN DELETE THE PREVIOUS POST ON THIS ISSUE ( PEOPLE WOULD HAVE UNDERSTOOD IT MORE)

Best friends.  Boyfriends.  Hmmm.  People deceive themselves a lot.

i wish you guys the best of luck in your friendship.

I think you guys will be fine.

@talknfree
some girls like to play hard to get. why not? if she ends up with you great, but you know some guys make it difficult too, if you give in too soon some call girls cheap. go figure

powderPink:

mission acomplished. now you got the attention and the topic is long forgotten . RESULT!

What and ever MS. Pink. I could careless how you feel. Just come holla at me when you get more than 50 posts.

Seun:

Best friends. Boyfriends. Hmmm. People deceive themselves a lot.

Rob was never my boyfriend, just my best friend. A very very very close bestfriend, but bestfriend none the less.

@Talknafree If a man ever tells me I look at you as my sister that means although he is with me phyically his heart is somewhere else so vice versa

sistawoman:

Rob was never my boyfriend, just my best friend. A very very very close bestfriend, but bestfriend none the less.

I aint disputing that fact.

The fact I am a little bit suprised about is that he is a best friend that sleeps on the same bed. This same best friend has admitted to having some feelings for You.

I was taught to avoid the occasion of sin, and sis, thats is one of them  

[size=8pt]well your friendship go get as he be now because of he said she said. Hope u understand what i mean[/size]

I was once in this kind of situation and trust me, things isnt da way it used 2 be

things can never be d same on like before

why are u doing this to yourself?

if u know a girl has put u in that frienship/brother zone. . . . . . . just dont do it

i aint mad at u tho

Weel Well well, i think the whole thing had to just happen like the saying goes GET RICH OR DIE TRYING, matbe this is SAY THE WORDS NOW OR DIE GUESSING. the truth is we still acted the VERY SAME WAY we used to before the whole talk. and believe me or not i know this girl is only trying to play hard and all that b'cus i never get to say often that a girl likes me blah blah blah but the very time i say such, i know exactly what i am saying. THIS GIRL REALLY WATS FOR THAN FRIENDSHIP. (but she doesnt want to open up so easily, )

GIRLS WHEN YOU TELL YOUR MALE FRIEND HE IS YOUR ROLE MODEL WETIN THAT ONE MEAN? 'CUS SHE SAID I AM HER ROLE MODEL.

do you think she likes u? if yes, then keep trying