i am really confused please advise.

I have been in a church relationship with this guy.

How We Met
His father is a very lovely old man, i like him alot, and the father usually beg me to eat in church cos i dont eat except junk foods etc. so during his father's 68 birthday celebration in church, the house ceremony was suppose to be the weekend following the church ceremony (his children arrangement sha), so after talking we ask him to say a wish, the old man was still laughing when his eyes got on me then he laughed again and said jokingly that his wish will be for me to come and cook in their house and eat with them lol. everyone shouted Elenumajeun like they usually call me - which of course means somebody that doesnt eat in yoruba lol.

So na i could not afford to allow an old man wish go unfulfilled so i went to their house to cook coconut rice and serve everyone food on the table, even though i use to see his children in church and ofcourse their lovely mom, nothing really brought us together not even greetings, but that day, seeing me in their house was joy for everyone, we had time to gist and like all of them will say, they never knew i was so funny and playful. so his second son took advantage, collected my number and we began to talk.

From office chat to night calls to outings we began to know more about ourselves, discovering things we never knew about each other and then he ask that we go into a relationship.

You know church relationship what it looks like, no kissing or romance lol and we are quite very busy, he works in the island and i work in mainland, he closes late most of the time and so do i, most time we can book a date and before you know its either an urgent meeting came up in his office or in my office so we just chat. and on saturdays i go for choir practice and he goes to usher meetings and preparation for service starts in the evening so we hardly have time to even see ourselves but we chat and call everyday.

One day, as i browse facebook to ease myself of the stress, i saw a friend request, i checked and the person had over 300 mutual friends i just knew he must be a church member cos i have many church members as friends so i accepted, i checked the face and he looked familiar.

Minutes later he chated me up to say thank you i did not reply, then he followed with, i was blessed by your teachings the other day, so in other for me not to look rude that maybe one of the people in my youth class is thanking me and i ignore, i just answered and he took it from there, chating from one church stuff to the other, i then realise we are in the same choir though we worship in different branches, we usually have bi monthly choir practice that bring every choir from other branch together so he promise to spot me in the general choir practice.

The general choir practice finally came and he tried to spot me but i went hiding, i drove off immediately after and when he did call i told him i was on my way already, he thought i was joking, the second choir practice for the month came and i stylishly escaped again, this time immediately i left, nigga tracked me down and followed me and i never knew, i only notice a car at my back when i was trying to park at home, i wanted to reverse so i saw a car was wondering why the person would not pass to give me space to reverse and park well, to my surprise when i came out of the car, this guy was there smiling on his steering.

We talked outside for sometime then he left, i begin to share the night call, i no longer do very long calls with my boy friend again cos his calls will be on the call waiting through out, disturbing and distracting me and once i drop his calls will come in, and sometime my boy friend will call back and find my number busy and his calls on call waiting, things continues this way, when my boy friend complained i told him, its nothing that its just some friends that's all. he is a very gentle guy so he just stopped complaining and never suspected me of anything.

Before i know what was happening, this new guy fell in love with me and started doing everything to attract me, then we started hanging out, even when meetings will pop up, like my boy friend will say ok let's cancel it, he will rather say ok, lets just meet in a minute no matter how and the good thing is we work in the same vicinity so its easy to meet, he will close from work and will drive down to my office, wait outside and wont even tell me he's around just to give me a surprise dinner dress and take me out, this guy is so romantic and very soon i begin to watch out for his surprises and at this point, calls with my boy friend dropped to like 40% and if he complains i will say i had a hectic day at work, or so much work to take care of which is why i have no time for calls and still he will believe all is well.

After like 12 months of this cat and dog walk, i begin to fall in love with him, so each time we talk he will say, make me the happiest man on earth, accept the proposal to love me please and in one of those days i just said, i love you.

This guy shouted and laughed for a very long time and said yes i got it, he said baby please let me inform my two best school friends that she has said yes now, he called two people and informed them and was so happy.

On Sunday morning he called to say he will be worshiping in my church branch that morning, that he want to see one of his school best friend whom he informed about me saying yes to him that he want the guy to arrange somethings for him. i said ok no problem.

So after church i saw him with my boy friend locking up and gisting seriously, laughing continuously in one corner, i was like are they setting me up or what, i left church immediately and avoided all of them, switched off my phone.

Later in the night i switched on and i got an sms from the two of them that they have been trying to reach me. each of them saying they wanted to introduce me to their best friend. wooooo!!!!

Immediately after he (new boy friend) called me and ask why i never looked for him, that he stayed almost in an open place talking with his best friend so i could see him, that he wanted to introduce me to him, that the guy will be his best man hmm.... he told me his best friend (who is also my boy friend)told him, he is dating a very good lady in church, best lady in the world and that he too will be getting married soon that he is planning to propose very soon.

So he said to me, i want us to do our wedding before him lol, that the guy must best him and then he laughed hard while i pondered around.

While i was still on his calls my boy friend was on awaiting calls, he had called 3 times so i told him somebody is calling i will need to answer immediately, i cut off his calls to respond to my boyfriend and he said baby why did you dissapear from church na, my best school friend visited the church today and i really wanted to show him who my baby is, he talked about his girl friend, how the girl is good, beautiful, brilliant but i think he hasn't seen you, by the time i introduce you to him, he will be speechless, he actually told me i should arrange some settings for him to propose to his girl friend, he said i should invite old school friends and there about which is what im working on.

i almost fainted on the call but honestly i dont know what to do.

I called the new boyfriend to tell him everything but he wont let me, i was looking funny with tears he said ok, please dont cry dont worry i will forgive you anything, i love you to that point, tell me anything you have to tell me, i do know you have a past but i love you beyond so if anything is bordering you, just let it go.

What should i d now?

And note i have not had any intimacy with the two of them, sex, romance or anything close to that, its been purely church relationships.

You don enta one chance

I can't finish reading this your story

my dear, i wld have love to finsh d write-up or story so dat i can give u d proper advice...i really commend u cos u av shown u r a really nice n great lady...honestly,please follow ur heart....wateva d situatn u r in ryt now,involve God in it....n am very sure He ll guide u n direct ur feet to d ryt path....

.

One word... 'Women'

hmmmmmm

ah dn show...















wetin dey happen for hia
























you say whatt!!!



























two guys wan marry you...




















how i wish both are Nairalanders...



























and your thread makes fp

tpia5: summary?

Girl in a relationship with Mr A, unknowingly fell in love with Mr B who is the best friend of Mr A.

Wooow! This is one situation I pray never to find myself in. Ending up with either of them will certainly ruin the frndship btw both frnds. My sister, as much as I'd like to help, the truth is, u got urslf into this mess. Since u're a child of God, I'd advice u seek direction frm God..

Robvp, if it's real, then you are a heartbreaker.

Why would you have messy relationships? You should close one before saying yes to another guy. In frank terms, this is what is popularly known as DOUBLE DATING.

Solution:
1. Break up with your "new" boyfriend.

2. Take some time off your old relationship (I couldn't call it "present relationship" 'cos everything is now messy)

3. Confess to your "new" guy and sever all emotional ties with him.

4. Go back to your old guy and mend things.

I cannot say how persistent and convincing this new guy was. But I'm afraid, he must live with the heartbreak. After all, he didn't meet you "free".... Well unless you hid that part from him.

farano: hmmmmmm

hope u can see this....

teeo:

Four words These babes ain't loyal

Ain't loyal at all.

teeo:

And she wants us to Believe she didn't sleep with either one of them. Yimu, girls can lie sha

Even if she didn't, men, the betrayal is painful. Not a sharp pain but a dull, throbbing, numbing one.

TyTymer: Robvp, if it's real, then you are a heartbreaker.

Why would you have messy relationships? You should close one before saying yes to another guy. In frank terms, this is what is popularly known as DOUBLE DATING.

Solution:
1. Break up with your "new" boyfriend.

2. Take some time off your old relationship (I couldn't call it "present relationship" 'cos everything is now messy)

3. Confess to your "new" guy and sever all emotional ties with him.

4. Go back to your old guy and mend things.

I cannot say how persistent and convincing this new guy was. But I'm afraid, he must live with the heartbreak. After all, he didn't meet you "free".... Well unless you hid that part from him.

This girl doesn't know what she want, save yourself the stress

This is tough.

If we're to follow Barney Stinson's rule, "New is always better"






But my advice:


Come clean for both of them.
Trust me, you will see the stronger and more mature man between the two.

The one word on mind - FICTION! Pardon me if your story is real but I find it difficult that in this age it will be that hard to connect two friends in the space of atleast a year.

Prowizy2: This girl doesn't know what she want, save yourself the stress

My brother e dey pain me like say an me.

Church girls dey cheat. And na dia own worse pass cos u won't expect it. Smh.

teeo:

And she wants us to Believe she didn't sleep with either one of them. Yimu, girls can lie sha

Really though, what does she even mean by 'church relationship'?

See this part:

Before i knew what was happening, this new guy
fell in love with me and started doing everything
to attract me, then we started hanging out, even
when meetings will pop up, like my boy friend
will say ok let's cancel it, he will rather say ok,
lets just meet in a minute no matter how and the
good thing is we work in the same vicinity so its
easy to meet.

Take note of the emboldened parts, it means if these two guys didn't end up being old friends...she would probably have...scratch that...in fact she already agreed to marry both of them oo.

Is this how they run 'Church Relationships' these days.

Eleyi gidi gan-an


This one is strong!!!

TyTymer:
My brother e dey pain me like say an me.

Church girls dey cheat. And an dia own worse pass cos u won't expect it. Smh.

Them they use the word Church as Camouflage. . Believe na dem bad pass!!

I have seen this film b4 na... Jim iyke, Stephanie okereke and Yul Edochie. Yul edochie finally got the girl sha.

Prowizy2: 'Runs Girl in Church' Directed by Tchidi Chikere

Honestly u are sick,stewpid and fuccked..the annoying part is ur still claiming church girl..am sure people like u insult guys and girls that double date and sleep around....u shouldnt dip ur hand in a bees comb if u dont wanna be stung..its true that we dont choose who we love but the christain thing u should have done is to break up with ur First BF when u knew u like the new guy...i would feel really hurt and betrayed if i was ur First BF..i understand the guy is not giving u the attention and time u need but u should have cut him lose than to cheat on him...ur best bet is to break up with one of them..follow ur heart in choosing the right guy cos been happy is the key to a healthy relationship

My opinion, maybe harsh or too straight forward is.


Confess to Mr. B break up with him.


Confess to Mr. A and ask for forgiveness.


Since na church parols and like u said, A is gentle he shud forgv u
And if he doesn't, B wud surely do.



If u cant do it, maybe afraid to break one of dem's heart, then break both.


Leave the vicinity.



Chikena

Prowizy2: Them they use the word Church as Camouflage. . Believe na dem bad pass!!

It reminds me of one church babe I had like dat. Hmmm. Deception is second nature to them.

UjSizzle:

Really though.... 'women'

Offer some advice to the sister bebe, I have none.