Getting Married and Personal Revelations

When you start feeling that urging/ prompting to marry, have your own family and settle down, what do you think about?

Must I marry to settle down?
Can I cope with married life?
Can I be faithful to marital vows?
How can I see my ideal wife?
Are my expectations realistic?
Can i get all my expectations/ desires in one woman?
How would I recognize my ideal wife?
Would she accept me?
Has GOD forgiven my sins and help me?
How do I know when GOD is directing me?
Should I consult pastors, prophets, etc?
Can I trust them?
What of my Parents?
Why can’t GOD just reveal to me my wife in a vision, etc?
Provision for the family nko?
How did my parents manage?
Can I copy them?
What about friends?

Getting Married and Personal Revelations

Steps and reactions from the world – be prepared. Remember don't ever think you can deceive GOD by pretending with plans to return to your former self after HE gives you a good partner. - FEAR GOD HE already knows all before you even thought of anything !! that's why it's a journey.

Though these steps are written with those that were involved in premarital sex, it suffices for everyone as we often commit lots of sexual sins without the actual sex proper.

1) Awakening that it’s time: This is principally by the Holy Spirit but your cooperation is required
Tactful parental pressures
The devil will keep your mind noisy and distracted to make sure you don’t heed the prompting of the Holy Spirit

2) Decision that I want to get married: This is our responsibility !! Nothing like waiting for GOD’s time. You take the decision then GOD leads you but the decision is ours
The devil will initiate his own project to distract, discourage and stop you
Objects of your sexual fantasies will all of a sudden want to be with you
All environment readings would indicate you are about to make a mistake
You would always stumble on married friends family wahala
Financial challenges may arise

3) Confess and Repent of all forms of sins especially sinful sexuality, etc and being truly sorry for them.
Sex is a covenant, so you need to extricate yourself from all previous sexual covenant.
Purge yourself of sinful desires
Objects of your sexual fantasies will now literally be pursuing you
Former exs’, etc would be constantly calling, etc
Temptations in all facets of life would double

4) Having perfect contrition for sins committed
Serious war to conquer yourself
Flesh Vs Spirit
Always in battle to convince the flesh of the worthiness of your course
Trying to reason out GOD

5) Ask for forgiveness
Prayerfully ask GOD to forgive you
Do penance
Expect to always encounter people you know that lived ‘horrid” sinful sexual lifestyle but are now married happily
Expect to always encounter people you know that lived ‘horrid” sinful sexual lifestyle and continued after marriage

6) Decision to live a life of Holiness Working out and living a holy life in fear and trembling (don't expect the devil to let go just like that):
Become active in Church
Meditate daily on HIS word
Pray always
Avoid people that may “contaminate” you
Pray for the grace of GOD to persevere in Holiness
Expect to always encounter people you know that lived ‘horrid” sinful sexual lifestyle but are now married happily
Expect to always encounter people you know that lived ‘horrid” sinful sexual lifestyle and continued after marriage
Expect encounters with lustful “men/ women of GOD”, in the church, etc

Getting Married and Personal Revelations contd
Steps and reactions from the world – be prepared. Remember don't ever think you can deceive GOD by pretending with plans to return to your former self after HE gives you a good partner. - FEAR GOD HE already knows all before you even thought of anything !! that's why it's a journey.

7) Present your marriage intentions before GOD and pray to the Holy Spirit for guidance.
Now be on high alert as the devil may present his own to you passively wait to be your father-in-law
Financial challenges
Career challenges
It’s retribution or pay-back time from the devil
It would be as if all your sins were never forgiven
Listen to direction from GOD on how to remove/ overcome obstacles that you were blind to when in the sinful world. He will lead you or bring forth the helpers
Foundation issues
Witches and wizards
Idolatory
Hardness of heart
Lack of humility
Pride
The Holy Spirit would illumine your minds to what you need to take care of for that moment – remember that it’s a journey

8 - Using HIS Word as your guide, look out for your marriage partner in Holiness
Expect lots of rejections
Expect the Trojan gift from the devil
DON’T sleep with any
Never you think you know or understand anyone in particular
Be very sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit
Avoid any form of sexual exploit including pornography, etc
Don’t preclude where or how the partner would come from
Subject and acceptance to HIS word in prayer
Don’t lead GOD !!!
Listen to your parents

9) Confirmation of partner
Be not hesitant/ fearful in proposing as nothing would work if the person is not for you, so far you put GOD first
DON’T FLEECE OR VISIT PROPHETS
If you are about to stray HE would bring you back in HIS own way. He may send helpers, etc but allow HIM to do it HIS own way
be not afraid as you would know it’s HIM that is leading you.
Focus on God to make you and your marriage happy not the partner !!!

Getting married and Personal revelations - contd


10) Be careful of Personal revelations
a) When you start dreaming or seeing visions of who your life partner is/ should be, be very careful. All personal revelations are suspicious till confirmed. fear and anxiety can make you see whatever you conceive in your mind, etc
b) Such revelations can be manipulations – The devil will try all his tricks
c) It can distract you
d) Don’t pray/ wish for them rather pray the Holy Spirit to direct you. And HE would direct you in HIS own way Not your own way
e) Continuously ask the GOD for meaning of any revelations
f) IF the revelations persists, seek wise counsel – in your Church first !!
g) Remember you are not a Saint !! so don’t keep focusing on supposed partner’s sins
h) Look at the partner through the glass of GOD
i) GOD doesn’t just give for today or tomorrow, HIS gift lasts a life time and add no sorrow
j) Allow the Holy Spirit to illuminate your mind that you see through HIM
k) A poor guy today may be a billionaire in 5yrs time
l) The illiterate today maybe a Medical doctor in 10yrs time
m) The proud virgin today may end up not being able to conceive
n) The repentant lady may end up being a model wife and mother
o) The obedient lady today may end up being jezebel in 10yrs time
p) The beautiful woman today may end up disfigured in 3yrs time
q) The handsome man today may end up disfigured in 2yrs time
r) The saintly guy today may end up being a chronic womanizer in 5yrs time
s) If your parents disagree with your choice, use prayer to win them (God will soften their heart). You need at least one to be with you.
t) Don't be disobedient to them. - Don't be too wise
u) the times of conviction, may be like delays to you but HE knows what HE is doing - much later would you realise and continue to thank HIM
v) Allow HIM that knows all to lead you - don't hop into bed (or engage in sinful sexuality) with the partner (in anticipation of HIS approval) before marriage proper
w) Whoever HE leads you to implies HE has bestowed upon both of you the requisite grace to have a blissful family life in accordance with HIS will not una will OO!!

Getting Married and Personal Revelations (contd) - Sources of Frustrations

1) Being in front and putting GOD behind
2) Setting own standard and aiming for them
3) Praying for what you want not what will glorify HIM
4) Believing own desires is right and should be granted by GOD – grant me my heart desires !!!
5) Striving after selfish interests
6) Putting physical/ materialism as priority factor instead of Spirituality
7) Continuing in sin (especially sexuality, night clubbing, etc) while praying and aspiring to marry
8 - Being so consumed with own interest and not being sensitive to the leading of the Spirit
9) Unconsciously replacing believe in GOD with believe in self
10) Praying to change the unchangeable Changer
11) Hoping to effect a cause in the Cause of all causes
12) Believing the your faith can move the Unmovable Mover
13) Always praying to see a vision or dream of your partner
14) Turning obsessions to dreams
15) Dreams and visions become manipulated
16) Every possible partner’s fault is seen in vision/ dreams
17) Believing that as a Holy righteous person, GOD should send you a partner from heaven in your full view with witnesses as compensation
18) Setting deadlines for GOD to answer prayers
19) Believing you are in a competitive race against/ with contemporaries

If you are already guilty of most of the above, then better snap out of it or else it may be better for you to visit a Teaching Hospital and have them manufacture a girl child that you can mould to the way you want .

Getting Married and Personal Revelations (contd) - Confirmation/ being sure of chosen partner

Having followed the steps stated, How am i sure that the chosen partner is the right one?

Most times when we want GOD to show us evidence/ proof of HIS faithfulness and love for us like when we pray that HE show us proof/ evidence that

1) the proposed partner is from HIM,
2) is the ideal partner, would ensure blissful fruitful marital/ family life,
3) it is because we want to blame HIM for any challenge that comes during the marriage.

Be certain of one thing - Challenges would surely arise!! HE told us that !! but HE also said that we should not be afraid for HE has overcome the world !!

So when you’ve followed the steps, go ahead and marry the partner for the Almighty GOD has within the period equipped you with the Power to overcome any that will arise

Treat any challenge that comes your way as either a cross of salvation
Or
Yoke of the devil that anointing of the Holy Spirit breaks

How do you discern which:
Pray, Pray but don’t ever resort to accusing GOD saying
“ that YOU should remember that YOU were the one that gave you the partner, now see what he/ she is doing to me”

Remember that GOD is plans and purposes are so ordered and too high for you to reason out. Faith is the key!!

I know a somebody that got sacked from his job and was jobless for over five yrs with family to feed. It was very tight and tough. He later got a good job and just some months after some people in his office approached with him an offer to join their cult to ensure rapid promotion. Guess his answer: GOD has trained and formed me very well during my tough times that I am vaccinated against such lures/ attractions !!!

So to all challenges that come your marital way, pray your way out. HE is ever with you !!!

Facing Marital challenges

Remember that we are on a journey of faith. Christians are pilgrims on a journey home - Heaven is our home
And there's only one way/ door/ gate - JESUS CHRIST
And all other guide leads you to the main guide - HOLY SPIRIT

As a single you can live life based on the daily bread approach but once you get married, anxiety creeps in and praying for / living life on daily bread approach becomes "myopic"

Marital challenges include:
communications issues
sexuality issues
conception
finance management
home management
in-laws management
Friends management
Spirituality issues
Cultural management
society management
Children management
Anger management
etc

We'll discuss some of them

Marital challenges - Communications issues

A couple should communicate very well with each other. They should learn patiently to harmonize their explicit and implicit understanding of each other. The first year in a marriage with Christian foundation is towards understanding each other. Even when couples were boyfriends and girlfriends before getting married, they need to learn and understand each as the uniting platform has changed drastically.

The platform now is built by GOD. So you should allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. See each other as a gift from GOD. When it seems he/ she is impossible, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. It may be you are the impossible one. Focus on his/ her good sides by looking through him/ her using GOD as glass.

Now the couple has to learn how to unite their vertical relationship with GOD and submit their horizontal relationship to it. Each should look at the other through the glass of GOD. In essence this like courtship. But one very good thing about it is that if the marriage is founded on GOD, HE provides an enabling environment for this.

This is a time for listening, talking not shouting, praying together, thinking before retorting or coming to an assumption.
Couples should try and refrain from comparing applying their understanding of their relations or friends to their marriage. It is better to allow listen and understand than coming to wrong assumptions in the early stage of the marriage. Trying to act based on predicting the other’s behavior may not be the best at this stage.

This is the whole essence of honeymoon or allowing the couple to be alone for the first stages of their marriage.
When friction results, talking is the solution. Talk about everything including how to talk and when to talk. Anything that is left not talked about would inadvertently be shouted about!!!

Allow the talking sessions to be a dialogue not monologue. Talking includes touching also Singing together, laughing together. Try to use gentle words.

When explicit understanding from talking is imbibed, then implicit understanding from body language is the next stage.

Marital Challenges - Spirituality issues

The moment you decided to marry or become celibate for the love of GOD you have incurred the wrath of the devil. Note that it war started from the date you took the decision not even when you got married. Since we are discussing marriage, all my discussions would center on it not on any other vocation.

In the discussing Spirituality in marital life, my discussion would flow from my Catholic believe/ faith.
Marriage is not just union of man and woman. Marriage is a Sacrament. And Sacrament is an outward sign of inward grace ordained by Jesus Christ by which grace is given to our souls.
This implies that marriage has graces attached to it. The devil knows it and would not rest till he makes you give up. Decision to get married is like decision to acquire more graces from GOD. Getting married is accepting to obey GOD’s word and join in the salvation for souls.

Someone may decide not to marry but he/ she must decide on a vocation!! Nature abhors vacuum!! Sex outside marital life is sin hence if one cannot abide in chastity without marriage, then he/ she should seek to marry.

We may say (especially women) that it’s not my fault that I am not married.
That suitors don’t come my way
Am I to marry myself?
Check the steps you took to ensure you fulfill God’s plan for you in life. If you took all the required steps and no suitor comes your way, be patient and prayerful find out from HIM HIS plan for you.
HE has specific plans for each of us. Nobody is an accident or coincident !!

The moment you decide to marry, the devil gets agitated at the idea that not only of loosing you, but that through you a soul winner/ warrior for GOD, etc would come into this world.
Hence he would put into motion all he has and can to thwart your implementation of that decision
Everything about marriage is about prayer. Marital life itself should be a prayerful life. Prayer is not just about vocal prayer. The way we live our marital life can be a prayer and win souls for GOD
Sustenance of this prayer/ marital life depends on our attachment to GOD.

Marital Challenges - Spirituality issues contd

In a marriage it may turn out that one of the partners is more spiritual than the other. This partner should realize that it is not the time to be proud, arrogant or condensing towards the other.

Neither should the partner feel burdened by the other. He/ she should see the marriage as part of GOD’s plan and lovingly help the other partner along.

He should not feel dismayed or disappointed with her/ his partner.
She/ he should focus on helping the partner along on the life journey

Marital Challenges - Spirituality issues contd

Normally it’s better is disparity of cults is avoided in marriage so couples can unite daily in same faith in prayer
The earlier couples inculcate deep Christian values in their marital life, the better for the family to be rooted in Christ
If the woman is the one gifted in spirituality then she needs to HUMBLY support the husband to grow spiritually not allow pride to place her above her husband
Of-course the devil is ready to start prodding the woman to assert her authority by granting her revelations, mystical experiences, but good discernment of spirit would reveal that GOD is not the source of such revelations
Any revelations that dictates or directs that married couples should divorce is very very suspicious!!

There is nothing like wrong marriage only difficult marriage as life itself is
Whatever spiritual challenges one encounters during marriage should be prayerfully treated like the cross of salvation
It’s not easy and not meant to be but faith in Christ conquers all
Even if there’s disparity of cults, couples should endeavour to pray together.
Sharing the word together enlightens us so much.

So far you had the glory of GOD as your intention for getting married, be assured that HE is aware of the disparity of cult in your marriage and has taken care of it
Remember your marriage is part of GOD’s plan in the entire world and only Him knows how everything fit together
Focus more on your agreed spirituality than on the differences. HE came that all may be one in HIM !!
Whenever the disparity threatens to rear it’s head, use prayer to overcome it!. The family is the mini-Church!! Never underestimate the efficacy of family prayers. Praises to GOD are same no matter the cult of fellowship/ worship

It maybe you that GOD planned to use to draw your partner to HIM and have children that would glorify HIS name

Marital Challenges - Conception

One of the purpose of marital life is procreation – man cooperating with GOD in creation

Put first things first

Marital life is not all about sex. – Sex should never be the main driving force for any marital life as its’ contribution to blissful marital life diminishes with time !!

First thing in marriage is for couple to thank GOD for HIS mercies, blessings and ask for HIS continued guidance and protection
Plead the precious Blood of JESUS on their lives
Ask the holy Spirit to take control of their lives
Pray to the Angels and Saints to constantly intercede for them
Then prayerfully present their request for children to GOD
Couple should try and get the book: Billings method of natural family planning by Leonie Mcsweeney
They should read it together and follow the recommendations and back it up with prayers
This is to have knowledge, avoid anxiety, etc,

The recommendations in the book is not exhaustive as GOD remains the only Almighty GOD and can do anything and HIS plan will unfold when you walk with HIM
But the book is a good way to start

Where conception becomes challenging, then you continue to pray, act, pray and wait on GOD!!

And I strongly recommend asking the Blessed Virgin Mary to pray for you

Why?

And I strongly recommend asking the Blessed Virgin Mary to pray for you

Why?

She’s the only woman (without her request) that GOD through HIS Angel sort her consent to entrust her with the conception of HIS SON by the power of the Holy Spirit
She embodies a model woman
Even her cousin Elizabeth said to be barren was used to “reinforce” her faith
She spoke and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit And John the Baptist leapt for joy in Elizabeth’s womb
And All generations shall call her blessed because of the mighty things the LORD did for her

Ask her to pray for you that by the merit of the sword that pierced her soul that the secret thoughts of many may be revealed:
That she pray to her Son to fill you with the Holy Spirit
That she pray to her Son to pour the joy of the Holy Spirit into the children in your womb

Even though I write from based on my Catholic faith which I profess, I can state with full conviction that this works but with one condition:
That the couple live Holy lives that can win souls for GOD

So muster your "little" faith in GOD (Holy soul winning life is required), remember the bridegroom at the wedding at Cana was not aware he was about to be put to shame and his visitors inconvenienced when She interceded. Your Holy soul winning life would ensure Her prayers don't allow you be put to shame or defeat. You might say that the faith required here is the faith of the ministry of Angels and Saints and theirs like the servants at the wedding is assured already

Remember that Heaven rejoices over the repentance of one sinner – imagine you and your partner being part of the cause of this Heavenly joy !!!

The husband should particularly ask St Joseph (husband of Mary) to pray for him to be sensitive and submissive to the leading of the holy Spirit like him

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATIONS

Sometimes it feels as if GOD:
is silent
has decided to allow our “enemies” get the better of us
has abandoned us

You’ll pray, fast with no result towards your main expectation instead the “deadline” would keep closing in
You've given, etc fulfilled all "requirements? yet no positive answer
You’ll so worried you can’t concentrate on anything except the answer to your prayers
Pastors, Prophets would tell you that GOD has blessed you so much or that your time of avour/ blessings/ answer to your prayers is here
You’ll even dream of it at night
Yet you can't see any of it manifest towards your expectations


Have you experienced such? What do we do?

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATIONS CONTD

The following fundamental truths will help us. It should be cast in stone in our minds

1) GOD created us
2) GOD did not consult us before HE created us
3) GOD did not consult us before HE decided on our life path
4) GOD created us out of love - to understand this love, we have to live in HIM
5) As the penny Catechism of the Catholic Church encapsulates it, GOD created us to know HIM, love HIM and serve HIM in this world and to be happy with HIM forever in the next
6) The final destination of our soul is the priority to GOD
7) GOD is infinitely merciful and good
8 - There is no meaning to life except in GOD
9) We can never fathom the depth or mystery of GOD and HIS ways
10) GOD is not subject to our instructions/ prayers/ etc - GOD is the unmoveable mover
11) GOD is totally in control of all things
12) GOD cares so much about all of us

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATIONS CONTD

Sources of frustrations - I believe this may be rooted in/ traced to that apple that our parents ate in their first act of disobedience

1) Man’s desire and failure to set his/ her life rules
2) Man’s desire and failure to live by his/ her rules
3) Man’s desire and failure to be judged by his/ her rules
4) Man’s desire and failure to reason out GOD and HIS ways
5) Man’s desire and failure to subject GOD to his/ her desires
6) Man’s desire and failure to dictate/ control his life path and destination and that of his neighbour!!

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATIONS CONTD
Sources of frustrations

When we put GOD on our timelines
When we make our desire GOD’s desire and priority
When we claim right standing with GOD
When we command GOD
When we reject the Cross of salvation
When we assume/ believe we are in a business relationship with GOD
When we reduce GOD to work only within our concern
When we consciously close our ears to need for order in all things
When we assume GOD needs to be alerted to our desires - doubt HIS love for us
When we think GOD is asleep or unconcerned
When we believe GOD understands our limitations, would overlook our failings hence we take HIS mercies as given/ for granted

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATIONS CONTD

Solutions towards overcoming frustrations. See it as a temporarily distraction that you must pass through and overcome

Pray, Hope, don’t worry – (St Padre Pio)
Consciously focus on thanking and praising GOD
HE loves to hear you laughing when you are in an awkward spot
When odds add up against you, it’s time to stop and sing; Praise GOD !!
Thank GOD for HIS mercies and blessings
Prayerfully forgive your foes
Pray for your foes
Pray for HIS mercies and forgiveness
Focus more on the good things in your life
Focus on the sacrifice on the Cross and its’ result/ gain
Meditate on HIS words
Focus on HIS plans as stated in the Bible than on your plans

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATIONS CONTD
Solutions towards overcoming frustrations

Whenever you feel about to despair, become despondent, angry with GOD, etc, try meditate on the agony/ passion of Christ, follow Christ’s way to Calvary by praying the Stations of the Cross – Although Catholic, it is a very efficacious illuminating prayer

First ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. Meditate on our LORD JESUS CHRIST agony at the garden of Gethsemane where HIS sweats were like drops of blood, HIS prayer “Father if it’s possible, let this cup pass me bye, but not MY will but YOUR will be done”, HIS pains, HIS submission.

Station 1
Jesus is condemned to death by Pontius Pilate

Mediate on how JESUS allowed Pilate to judge HIM and condemned HIM to death. Think about the hypocrisy of Pilate. Pretending to be innocent by washing his hands just to please the people because he believes he needs them to be allowed by Ceasar to remain as governor. He omitted GOD from his consideration. Also how the people shouted “let HIS blood be upon us and our children”. How a thief was let go instead of an innocent MAN

SON of GOD HIMSELF, and the ALMIGHTY GOD allowed it and the SON submitted without protest all for our sake.

Is your present situation like HIS?
Are you:
being calumniated?
Accused and condemned wrongly?
Suffering injustice?
Suffering oppression?

HE understands all for HE went through it and more for all of us. So HE is ever steadfast and helping us since HE knows what it’s like. HIS is a tested and should be trusted love

6“Though being divine in nature,
he did not claim in fact equality with God,
7 but emptied himself,
taking on the nature of a servant, made in human likeness,
and in his appearance found as a man.
8 He humbled himself by being obedient ….”

Do you still feel cheated/ neglected by GOD and that GOD should give you exceptional treatment?

If so, Why?

1) Because you merit it?
2) Because you worship HIM
3) Because you give offerings or tithes?
4) Because HE loves you?
5) Because HIS only begotten SON underwent this agony for your sake?

DEALING WITH FRUSTRATION CONTD - FOLLOWING HIM TO CALVARY

Station 2
Jesus carries HIS Cross
He has carried away our burdens and our sorrows. On HIM lies our punishment

Meditate on how our LORD JESUS CHRIST willingly accepted the cross as HIS own in atonement for our sins not HISs’
It was not easy for HIM for HE was as man
All HE cared about was fulfilling the will of HIS FATHER and our FATHER
Out of the Love HE has HIS FATHER and for us
But HE submitted and accepted it

Your object of frustration, have you prayed about it?
Have you discerned if it’s a cross of salvation?
Or yoke of the devil?
IF it is your cross of salvation, carry it in thanksgiving and joy and follow HIM who said:

24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If you want to follow me, deny yourself, take up your cross and follow me. Mat 16: 24

Mat 11: 28 - 30
28 Come to me, all you who work hard and who carry heavy burdens and I will refresh you.
29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble of heart; and you will find rest.
30 For my yoke is good and my burden is light."

But if it’s a yoke of the devil, pray for the anointing of the HOLY SPIRIT to break it in JESUS name – Amen
HE gave us this power by HIS cross !! for HE did not accept and carry it willingly in vain.
HE did it that we may be free of any yoke of the devil !!!

27 On that day, their burden will be lifted off your shoulders, their yoke lifted off your neck. The yoke will be destroyed. IS 10: 27

Station 3 - 9
Jesus Falls down

As a man Jesus was losing strength and fell down. But HE did not stay down. He go up and continued on the way to Calvary. He did not say it is too much, let me just die here and now. What was uppermost in HIS mind was fulfilling the will of HIS Father and glorifying the Father’s name.

Have you considered the plight of HIS Mother?
The joint sorrows of Mother and SON.
The “shame” JESUS must have felt at the Mother’s witness of HIS suffering, “helplessness” and humiliation
Meditate on how HE was stripped of HIS clothing and wrapped in scarlet cloak and a crown of thorns place on HIS head - the Head of the King of Kings!! - Have you undergone such humiliation? Do you think GOD would allow it?
What of the Mother’s reaction to the situation? Accusers? Torturers? Agony of Her SON?
What must have been the silent agony of this widow!!!

Thank GOD some people were submissive to the Holy Spirit and yielded to be used as mantle of compassion: Simon of Cyrene and Veronica
Have you thanked GOD for the many Simon of Cyrenes and Veronica HE has placed along your life lines?
Have you tried to yield to the HOLY SPIRIT to be used as Simon of Cyrene and Veronica in people’s lives?
And when you did, did you pray to decrease and the HOLY SPIRIT increase that all glory be to GOD?

When you are carrying your cross, how do you react to consolations, compassion from people? Anger? Etc
When you see people carrying their cross do behave like the women that mourned with JESUS or you mock them?
When you are feeling frustrated, remember the agony, pains and humiliations our LORD JESUS CHRIST went through for your sake and know that it is not in vain. Your victory is assured ! So don’t despair or become despondent

Pray, "remind" the Almighty GOD of HIS love for you that HE allowed HIS SON to go through all that. As the Psalmist say "How can i repay the LORD for HIS goodness to me..."

Acknowledge, Confess and renounce your sins. Ask for grace to be Holy!!
Pray for sinners all over the world
Pray over their persistent sinful actions that mock the agony of JESUS’s cross

I’ll pause with the stations of the cross of calvary to discuss

Youths and their Challenges

This morning on my way to work, a young man stopped me and asked for some money to complete the amount he needed to buy a cell phone. My amount he requested was so meagre.

I was ready to give it to him but I decided to go further and if possible give HIM to him if he is open to the Holy SPIRIT. I felt the amount is not the issue but what he may be facing. This discernment was granted to me at that moment by the HOLY SPIRIT

So I asked what he does for a living?
Where he lives/ stays?
What religion?

He replied:

That he is 34yrs old
That he lives with a friend
‘was sent out packing from his parents home by his parents
He believes he has passed the age of staying with his parents by their tradition
He has to fend for himself
He is a Christian

Youth and their challenges - My morning encounter contd

My counsel/ discussion:

Go back to your parents home and stay with them

Match and stamp on his ego and go back to his parents

IF you were stubborn/.disobedient, apologise to them

Situations due to unrealized expectations can cause parents and children to be harsh/ bitter towards each other

If his parents were subjecting him to what he feels were humiliation before his little ones, he accept it as his cross and carry it in thanksgiving

He should commit everything to GOD in prayer and wait on HIM

Remain obedient to his parents

Continue to seek the face of GOD prayerfully

A true friend would not accept you into his place if your parents throw you out without first reaching out to your parents

The world outside your parents home is very hostile

That you have not “made” it at 34yrs is not your fault!! – so far you live HOLY life

GOD that created you did not consult you before creating you and planning your life

There is only one commandment that has instant reward attached to it – N0. 5: Honour thy father and mother that thy days may be long !!

“Making’ it in life is determined by GOD

Youth and their challenges - my morning encounter contd

My counselling to him

Rejecting parental advice (good ones) and opting to go on your own is not part of GOD’s plan

If he feels he is worst hit by life situations, he should consider the sick, the poorest of the poor, etc

What about people that have been on admission for years in the hospital

What about that virgin that is 43yrs old and still at her parents’ house waiting for a suitor

He should remember the agony and passion of CHRIST for us all

Life deals to each of us different hands but in CHRIST we are conquerors

One cannot be a Christian when disobedient to his/ her parents so far they were not luring you to do evil

The heart of the Kings and Princes are in GOD’s hands

No genuine help would come the way of somebody that disregards his/ her parents as remain GOD’s authority over you on earth

Deceitful people would encourage you that you can make it without your parents blessings

The devil and his agents hold out false, deceitful, empty promises and hopes to cause us to disregard our parents and GOD’s ways and laws

All the distractions and fake handouts from the devil and his agents is to ensure he doesn’t reap the bounties of blessings GOD has prepared for
him and eagerly waiting to shower on him

Youths and their challenges - my morning encounter

My counselling

I the asked/ requested that he promise me to go and reconcile with his parents as a condition for my giving him the money he sought
That He seems to be a predetermined source of GOD’s fountain of blessings for his family and many others

My promise to him based on the word of GOD is that if he goes back and reconciles with his parents and remain in GOD, he would meet me same place sometime later to testify to the LORD’s abundant mercies and blessings

Youths and their challenges - My morning encounter contd

My deductions

My behavior to the guy was enabled by particular gift of discernment bestowed on me by the HOLY SPIRIT for that moment

I realized he needed CHRIST and HIS words not money or phone

HE was truly receptive (to me) and spent about 30mins without quarrelling

His Soul and Spirit is yearning for GOD

His time of arrest by the HOLY SPIRIT has come

He is highly favoured with GOD’s grace

Please don’t ask me how come I stopped to listen and chat with the guy – honestly I don’t know why. Only GOD knows but I felt so good afterwards and realized I could spend hours and days with the guy just to speak the WORD into him.

Let us all try to spare some moments to discern what the “beggars’ around us need not what they “think/ feel” they need. The paraclete is ever ready to guide us. May GOD be ever glorified now and forever in JESUS name - Amen !!

Station 11
Our LORD JESUS is nailed to the cross

Meditate on how HE submitted to be nailed to the cross

HIS agony each time the nailed was hammered into his hands and feet.

The pain must have been indescribable

How did HIS disciples and relations feel?

Were they humiliated?

What of the Mother?

When you are worried and ashamed at your humiliation before your family and friends, remember what HE went through for your sake

He was crucified in between two thieves !!! And one of the thieves even mocked HIM !! But HE bore all for our sake

Remember HIS words: When you have lifted up the Son of Man, then you will know that I am HE and that i do nothing of Myself. What the Father has taught Me is what i preach. Now the prince of this world is to be overthrown. And when i am lifted up from the earth, i shall draw all men to Myself" - Jn 8:28, 12:31 - 32

Regard whatever your source of frustration is as a gate way to glorification of GOD in your life via triumph of HIS cross

Station 12
JESUS dies on the cross

JESUS hung on the cross held by nails in HIS hands and feet for three whole hours
HE watched his torturers gamble for HIS clothing
The people mocked HIM
The devil tempted HIM to come down from the cross to prove Himself
They gave HIM vinegar to drink

The agony was so much and HE felt derelict – “My GOD, My GOD why have YOU forsaken ME”
Even at that HE prayed and commended us to HIS mother – “Mother behold thy son, son, behold thy mother”
But HE remained there on the cross for us !! what obedience and love in action !!

HE then breathed out HIS last and Heavens bore witness and spoke for HIM –Lk 23: 44 - 49

44 It was now about noon.
45 The sun was hidden and darkness came over the whole land until mid-afternoon; and at that time the curtain of the Sanctuary was torn in two.
46 Then Jesus gave a loud cry, "Father, into your hands I commend my spirit." And saying that, he gave up his spirit.
47 The captain on seeing what had happened, acknowledged the hand of God. He said, "Surely this was an upright man."
48 And all the people who had gathered to watch the spectacle, as soon as they saw what had happened went home beating their breasts.
49 Only those who knew Jesus stood at a distance, especially the women who had followed him from Galilee; they witnessed all this.

So whatever may betide you that seems to frustrate you, keep your focus on GOD, never forget the love that made HIM allow HIS only begotten SON to be crucified. Let the name of JESUS ever be on your lips. HE did not die in vain !!!

In that your Gethsemany like period, remember these golden words of Ps 30
2 I extol you, O Lord, for you have rescued me; my enemies will not gloat over me.
3 O Lord my God, I called to you for help, and you healed me.
4 O Lord, you have brought me up from the grave, you gave me life when I was going to the pit.
5 Sing to the Lord, O you his saints, give thanks and praise to his holy name.
6 For his anger lasts but a little while, and his kindness all through life.
Weeping may tarry for the night, but rejoicing comes with the dawn.
7 Once in my prosperity I said, "I shall not be troubled."
8 Yet it was you, O Lord, who had me stand on the rock; as soon as you hid your face, I wavered!
9 To you, O Lord, I called; to you I begged for mercy:
10 "What good would there be in my destruction, in my going down to the pit?
Would my dust give you praise?
Would it prove your faithfulness?
11 Hear, O Lord, and have mercy on me; O Lord, be my protector."
12 But now, you have turned my mourning into rejoicing; you have taken off my sackcloth and wrapped me in the garments of gladness.
13 And so my soul, no longer silent, now sings praise without ceasing. O Lord my God, forever will I give you thanks.

The beauty of passing and through and overcoming trials, agony, frustrations, etc is that the devil doesn’t seem to realize that the reward is so glorious!!
So keep up with fighting the good fight. Always look on the crucifix and draw your strength from the crucified ONE !!

Station 13
Jesus is taken down from the cross

Even with everything that happened when HE breathed HIS last, the devil was not about to let go. The people in their bid to ensure they prevail, had HIS side pierced by a lance because HE had died when they wanted to bring HIM down !! (that piercing must have been replicated in the heart of the Mother)

Is it an offence to die on time?
Well, they pierced HIS side and blood and water gushed forth. What a miracle!! The enemies just opened for us a way to Heaven
Water to wash our filth
Blood to inebriate us
Pray and ask the Almighty GOD to graft you into the pierced side of JESUS that you may take root in HIM, germinate and bear fruits that glorifies GOD
That way, HE becomes your vine and you HIS branch.
And you now draw water from the well of salvation, the spring of life

What about the people that volunteered to bury HIM? Joseph or Arimathea and Nicodemus
Next time you about to criticize some people whom you believe they don’t go to Church, etc remember you may be so wrong !!
All go to Church, but you may not be there when they come.
Joseph of Arimathea was a disciple of Jesus –though a secret one because he was afraid of the Jews, but he had courage to approach pilate – open knowledge!!
Nicodemus first went to Jesus at night time.
It may seem that they were hypocritical in their faith in Jesus at first but the last now became the first !! where were the first ones!!

Station 14

Jesus is placed in the sepulcher

They placed HIM in an unused tomb and the people still set guards – who said the devil is not afraid of the WORD !!!
Make it your weapon as St Paul said – Sword of the Spirit !!!

Everything they did only made the resurrection glorious and wonderful

And how the Apostles and HIS Mother must have felt – fear, disappointed, shamed, defeated, etc but they somehow kept a little flame alive in themselves. That is why they could even dare to visit the tomb when told that HE is risen
Notice that it is even to the most unexpected that the LORD chose to reveal HIMSEL to first.

Don’t get frustrated, get attached to HIS words, promises. The power of resurrection is knocking at your heart.
No matter what, our LORD does not condemn anyone. It is only the devil that help us to condemn ourselves to reject GOD’s help and offer for reconciliation and life !!

Reject his accusations and accept life in CHRIST !! Don’t give in to despair and despondency. It is like rejecting the Love of the HOLY SPIRIT

Having a beautiful, fulfilling celebration and looking forward to the new year

The following are the keys to having a fulfilling celebration
Put the glory of GOD first
Being a source of succour to souls
Joy and Peace of the Holy Spirit in your life
And every other thing will follow suit

Thank God for HIS steadfastness, mercies, blessings
Ask the Holy Spirit to illuminate your life especially your dark areas
Prayerfully meditate on HIS word on how to sanctify your life
Confess your sins
Act on the dark areas by taking positive actions like:
Forgiving those you are begrudging
Rejecting sinful sexuality
Rejecting lies, etc
Pray and ask for HIS forgiveness
Pray for the Holy Spirit to inspire/ guide you on a way forward in line with GOD’s plan for you
Ak for HIS guidance on steps to actualize HIS plans for you
Make these inspired direction your New year resolutions
Once sanctification of your life is your new year resolution you are on the right track