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Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late - Romance - Nairaland

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Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Orikinla(m): 11:31am On Dec 02, 2008
Yesterday December 1, was the World AIDS Day, and I saw some women from a local NGO distributing condoms gratis at the popular Morocco Bus Stop in Shomolu, Lagos. I remembered how I coordinated the World AIDS Day for 250 NGOs in Nigeria in 1993.

The news report of over 1, 3000 girls and women raped in seven months in the Delta state of South-south region of Nigeria is an indication of the failure of the Nigerian government in addressing the prevalence of sex abuse in Nigeria and sexual harassment of innocent girls and women is still common in Nigeria. Rapists have been released without prosecution and their wounded victims left to live with the stigma and trauma of the scars of rape.

Distributing free condoms on the street is not the solution to the problem of unsafe sex and not the best method for the control and prevention of HIV/AIDS. We have to address the dangerous trend of the popularity of pornographic music and movies in Nigeria. The National Broadcasting Commission has lost control of the airwaves and TV screens as desperate callous and unscrupulous music and movie producers, directors and artistes are using their psychedelic music and pornographic videos to corrupt the impressionable minds of the millions of vulnerable girls and boys in Nigeria. The sexploitation of innocent girls and boys is promoting promiscuity and the spread of HIV/AIDS.

We must stop the sexploitation of our girls and boys if we want to save their generation from the plague of HIV/AIDS.

We must love, respect and protect our vulnerable girls and women lest they become corrupt and lost in the wilderness of lust.

Photo Credit: Wolfgangsvault.Com

Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Janeesa: 8:19pm On Dec 02, 2008
Yea,I heard about that and it really ANGERS me! Those rapists AND MOLESTERS SHOULD BE PUT IN JAIL.!! angry
Sometimes I think Nigeria is a backwardS country, how can they want to jail people for stealing things of no importance BUT let rapists and molesters go FREE? This just motivates me to study law, go to Nigeria and persecute those BASTARDS. This is COMPLETELY UNBELIEVABLE!!! angry

WTF! these stupid dumb ass men are stealing these young girls innocence!!!!!!!!!!!! angry SOMETHING HAS GOT TO FREAKING GIVE!!! I MEAN C'MON. NIGERIA CANT HELP HER CITIZENS?! WTF!!
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Janeesa: 8:22pm On Dec 02, 2008
ABSTINENCE IS THE KEY NOT CONDOMS!!!! CONDOMS DONT DO SHIT, THEY ARENT EVEN 60 PERCENT SAFE TALK LESS OF 80!!!!!!!!!!!!!! angry


ORIKINLA, IS THERE ANYTHING I COULD DO TO HELP? I WANT TO GO TO NIGERIA AND SPEAK ABOUT ABSTINENCE!!!
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by 25more(f): 8:59pm On Dec 02, 2008
Janeesa:

ABSTINENCE IS THE KEY NOT CONDOMS!!!! CONDOMS don't DO SHIT, THEY ARENT EVEN 60 PERCENT SAFE TALK LESS OF 80!!!!!!!!!!!!!! angry



no abstinence wouldnt help, we are in different world if it was in 18 century where sex wasnt glamourous and everyone had same mindset, it would have been alot effective but now things have changed, sex is everywhere and people talk about, sex education is more effective because not everyone can abstain 4rom sex so it is better u teach people how to be safe while having sex.

also condoms are very effective when it is used probably, people just have to learn to wear and use it probably
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by HRhotness(f): 9:02pm On Dec 02, 2008
Janeesa:

ABSTINENCE IS THE KEY NOT CONDOMS!!!! CONDOMS don't DO SHIT, THEY ARENT EVEN 60 PERCENT SAFE TALK LESS OF 80!!!!!!!!!!!!!! angry


ORIKINLA, IS THERE ANYTHING I COULD DO TO HELP? I WANT TO GO TO NIGERIA AND SPEAK ABOUT ABSTINENCE!!!

talk is cheap!
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Deshannel(m): 9:17pm On Dec 02, 2008
Ya n acting is expensive.
Easier said than done.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by jgirl3: 9:22pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

Ya n acting is expensive.
Easier said than done.
Abi o!
Oooooh! I just saw you have a different version of my siggy. Copycat! tongue tongue

It's sad. Parents should bring up their children with better morals. These days when divorce is too common, children go out seeking for love elsewhere and get themselves in all kinds of situations.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by HRhotness(f): 9:30pm On Dec 02, 2008
j-girl:

Abi o!
Oooooh! I just saw you have a different version of my siggy. Copycat! tongue tongue

It's sad. Parents should bring up their children with better morals. These days when divorce is too common, children go out seeking for love elsewhere and get themselves in all kinds of situations.

I think d major factor is that most nigerian parents tend to avoid d sex talk and leave their kids to learn frm tv, music and frm their equally ignorant friends. how many pple rember having d sex talk with theor parents? its not sumthin that sits well in our society creating d gap for all kinds of crap to get in
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by jgirl3: 9:35pm On Dec 02, 2008
HR.hotness:

I think d major factor is that most nigerian parents tend to avoid d sex talk and leave their kids to learn frm tv, music and frm their equally ignorant friends. how many people rember having d sex talk with theor parents? its not sumthin that sits well in our society creating d gap for all kinds of crap to get in
I agree. That is a big contribution too. How many parents are even comfortable talking about sex with their kids. They think it's fine to just say 'don't have sex'. I don't know since when the word 'don't' makes you not want to do something. It's a way of rebelling.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by sistawoman: 9:54pm On Dec 02, 2008
j-girl:

Abi o!
Oooooh! I just saw you have a different version of my siggy. Copycat! tongue tongue

It's sad. Parents should bring up their children with better morals. These days when divorce is too common, children go out seeking for love elsewhere and get themselves in all kinds of situations.

Not true even those raised in two parent families have sex early.

HR.hotness:

I think d major factor is that most nigerian parents tend to avoid d sex talk and leave their kids to learn frm tv, music and frm their equally ignorant friends. how many people rember having d sex talk with theor parents? its not sumthin that sits well in our society creating d gap for all kinds of crap to get in

That is not just Nigerian families it is Christan families. They would rather preach abstinence instead of protection. They fear that teaching your child how to protect themselves will encourage them to have sex. A child will have sex when they are ready no matter what you do as a parent, so I believe it is better to equip my children with the tools they need so they dont bring home any unwanted packages, be that babies or diseases.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by jgirl3: 9:56pm On Dec 02, 2008
sistawoman:

Not true even those raised in two parent families have sex early.
I didn't say that's the reason why. There have been studies to show that those who grow up in single homes are more likely to find love elsewhere and have problems. I'm not saying it's only those in single parent families that have these problems. I'm saying it's more likely in such homes.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by HRhotness(f): 9:58pm On Dec 02, 2008
sistawoman:

That is not just Nigerian families it is Christan families. They would rather preach abstinence instead of protection. They fear that teaching your child how to protect themselves will encourage them to have sex. A child will have sex when they are ready no matter what you do as a parent, so I believe it is better to equip my children with the tools they need so they don't bring home any unwanted packages, be that babies or diseases.

at least d christain family preaches sumthin. . . most nigerian families act like it doesnt exist. . . kinda like, if they ignor it, it will go away
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Tbag5: 9:59pm On Dec 02, 2008
Yea,I heard about that and it really ANGERS me! Those rapists AND MOLESTERS SHOULD BE PUT IN JAIL.!!
Sometimes I think Nigeria is a backwardS country, how can they want to jail people for stealing things of no importance BUT let rapists and molesters go FREE? This just motivates me to study law, go to Nigeria and persecute those BASTARDS. This is COMPLETELY UNBELIEVABLE!!!  
WTF! these stupid dumb ass men are stealing these young girls innocence!!!!!!!!!!!!  SOMETHING HAS GOT TO FREAKING GIVE!!! I MEAN C'MON. NIGERIA can't HELP HER CITIZENS?! WTF!!


I want you to understand that 90% of rape cases are not being reported in Nigeria, perhaps because of stigmatization. And if a rape case is not reported, how would be prosecution be effected.

NB. Most rape cases are not being reported in other countries too. . . .not just Nigeria
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Deshannel(m): 10:12pm On Dec 02, 2008
I think kids brotup in a single parent family tends 2 know more bout d gud n bad about sex than dose brougt up by 2 parents.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Tbag5: 10:35pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

I think kids brotup in a single parent family tends 2 know more bout d good n bad about sex than dose brougt up by 2 parents.

Thats rather a dumb assumption. undecided
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by 25more(f): 10:38pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

I think kids brotup in a single parent family tends 2 know more bout d good n bad about sex than dose brougt up by 2 parents.

it is actually the opposite in a study conducted it was actually girls who were raised in a single family that cited that the most reason for having sex early was due to their father absence in their life. no father figure to caution them and at least direct them on certain things especially boys.

here are some of the reasons why teens  dont use contractptions and have sex

1)ignorance 2) guilt related to sexual activity 3) minimal commuication about birth control 4) alcohol use 5) mass media norms of unprotected promiscuity

here are some reasons some of the why teens abstain from sex

1)high intelligence 2) religiosltiy 3) father presence 4)participation in service learning programs
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by bettes(f): 10:43pm On Dec 02, 2008
T_bag:



I want you to understand that 90% of rape cases are not being reported in Nigeria, perhaps because of stigmatization. And if a rape case is not reported, how would be prosecution be effected.

NB. Most rape cases are not being reported in other countries too. . . .not just Nigeria
[color=#000099][/color]

Its frustrating to know that even when these rape cases are reported,the police do little or nothing about it.In some cases the victims are even blamed.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Tbag5: 10:51pm On Dec 02, 2008
25%more:

it is actually the opposite in a study conducted it was actually girls who were raised in a single family that cited that the most reason for having sex early was due to their father absence in their life. no father figure to caution them and at least direct them on certain things especially boys.

here are some of the reasons why teens  don't use contractptions and have sex

1)ignorance 2) guilt related to sexual activity 3) minimal commuication about birth control 4) alcohol use 5) mass media norms of unprotected promiscuity

here are some reasons some of the why teens abstain from sex

1)high intelligence 2) religiosltiy 3) father presence 4)participation in service learning programs


In as much as your submission is true, I think environment of should be considered and it could sure "up" the reasons for these negative behaviors. . . .moreover, are these responsible for rape and the consequenses of rape as the Initial topic wants to discuss?
bettes:

[color=#000099][/color]

Its frustrating to know that even when these rape cases are reported,the police do little or nothing about it.In some cases the victims are even blamed.

To be honest. . .the law enforcement in Nigeria is quite sad and the judicial system is pathetic too. But it must be made clear that most Nigerians even dont know how to present their cases. The Police guys could be annoying. . .but trust me, when you make it clear to them that you are serious abt your case , they tend to sit tight.

Moreover, they would want to prosecute the criminal to the latter knowing fully well they will milk "him" too

There is still justice in Nigeria. . . .it's just that it's quite expensive in Nigeria to do than rest of the world.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Deshannel(m): 10:57pm On Dec 02, 2008
@25
Nope.i shud av stated dis earlier. Single parents might not hav d time. BUT d bond wit his/her child is stronger than that of a two parent.
So he/she more chances to teach kid bout sex cos d parent-child relationship is stronger
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by 25more(f): 10:58pm On Dec 02, 2008
T_bag:

In as much as your submission is true, I think environment of should be considered and it could sure "up" the reasons for these negative behaviors. . . .[b]moreover, are these responsible for rape and the consequenses of rape as the Initial topic wants to discuss?[/b]To be honestthe law enforcement in Nigeria is quite sad and the judicial system is pathetic too. But it must be made clear that most Nigerians even don't know how to present their cases. The Police guys could be annoyingbut trust me, when you make it clear to them that you are serious about your case , they tend to sit tight.

Moreover, they would want to prosecute the criminal to the latter knowing fully well they will milk "him" too

There is still justice in Nigeria. . . .it's just that it's quite expensive in Nigeria to do than rest of the world.

i wasnt replying to the poster, as u can see from quoting me, i quoted someone and was replying to that particular reply
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Tbag5: 11:01pm On Dec 02, 2008
@ 25%

Am not attacking you.

I just want to know if these submmissions could be linked to rape. . .no offence meant.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by chika98: 11:04pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

I think kids brotup in a single parent family tends 2 know more bout d good n bad about sex than dose brougt up by 2 parents.

This is an ignorant statement and baseless too.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by sistawoman: 11:09pm On Dec 02, 2008
chika98:

This is an ignorant statement and baseless too.

I would have to agree with his statement. I know my bond is much much tighter with my children then it was with my parents growing up.

As a single parent we work extra hard to make up for the missing parent and we do tend to form tighter bonds with our children because they lack the second parent. It is just not in my home but the homes of several responsible single parents that I know.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Deshannel(m): 11:09pm On Dec 02, 2008
@chika
Read d backup post.
Ps; if u ask 4 insults, u get em
I would be willing cos aint selfish in giving it out.
Hope we cool.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by 25more(f): 11:10pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

@25
Nope.i should av stated this earlier. Single parents might not hav d time. BUT d bond wit his/her child is stronger than that of a two parent.
So he/she more chances to teach kid bout sex because d parent-child relationship is stronger

how can a single parents have more bond with their children than 2 parents? he/she has to work everytime to support the kids/ cook/clean/ i mean do everything whereas, 2 parents one works or two works but they will still have more time to discuss things with their kids. even if the father dnt do it the mum would. i guess maybe we have different views on what constutites  a single parents and what they do, but i still think it is the opposite.
i dnt mean to say that single parents dnt have bond with kids, having one parent makes it eaiser for the person to relate to their parent, cox he/she is the only one you have but i think when there 2 parents they learn certain things from each of their parents.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Tbag5: 11:15pm On Dec 02, 2008
25%more:

how can a single parents have more bond with their children than 2 parents? he/she has to work everytime to support the kids/ cook/clean/ i mean do everything whereas, 2 parents one works or two works but they will still have more time to discuss things with their kids. even if the father dnt do it the mum would. i guess maybe we have different views on what constutites a single parents and what they do, but i still think it is the opposite.
i dnt mean to say that single parents dnt have bond with kids, having one parent makes it eaiser for the person to relate to their parent, cox he/she is the only one you have but i think when there 2 parents they learn certain things from each of their parents.


The highlited statement is very correct.
To butress it, . . . it kind of helps the child have a balanced view of things without being lopsided to female angles or male angles
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by jgirl3: 11:16pm On Dec 02, 2008
sistawoman:

I would have to agree with his statement. I know my bond is much much tighter with my children then it was with my parents growing up.

As a single parent we work extra hard to make up for the missing parent and we do tend to form tighter bonds with our children because they lack the second parent. It is just not in my home but the homes of several responsible single parents that I know.
Sistawoman, I keep telling you that not everyone is like you or the people around you. Psychologically, single parents do not provide the best examples for children to follow. It messes them up in several ways.

25%more:

how can a single parents have more bond with their children than 2 parents? he/she has to work everytime to support the kids/ cook/clean/ i mean do everything whereas, 2 parents one works or two works but they will still have more time to discuss things with their kids. even if the father dnt do it the mum would. i guess maybe we have different views on what constutites a single parents and what they do, but i still think it is the opposite.
i dnt mean to say that single parents dnt have bond with kids, having one parent makes it eaiser for the person to relate to their parent, cox he/she is the only one you have but i think when there 2 parents they learn certain things from each of their parents.

Exactly!
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by Deshannel(m): 11:22pm On Dec 02, 2008
@25
How old r u by d way?
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by sistawoman: 11:23pm On Dec 02, 2008
25%more:

how can a single parents have more bond with their children than 2 parents? he/she has to work everytime to support the kids/ cook/clean/ i mean do everything whereas, 2 parents one works or two works but they will still have more time to discuss things with their kids. even if the father dnt do it the mum would. i guess maybe we have different views on what constutites  a single parents and what they do, but i still think it is the opposite.
i dnt mean to say that single parents dnt have more with kids, having one parent makes it eaiser for the person to relate to their parent, cox he/she is the only one you have but i think when there 2 parents they learn certain things from each of their parents.


I dont think we really want to debate whether single parenthood or double parenthood is better because we all know that having two is better than one.  

But the truth of the matter is most responsible single parents throw their lives into their children and work doubly hard to make up for the missing parent.  

Like in our house my boys cook, clean, wash clothes, take out the trash, cut the grass, etc.  They did not learn these things on their own but by doing them side by side with me.  All of this quality time is used to teach.  

I never let an opportunity slip by w/o teaching them something, even if we are sitting down and watching TV or riding in the car, there is a life lesson to be learned.  Because as single parents we know the chips and statics are stacked against us the responsible ones make every effort not to have our kids repeat our mistakes and make sure they have all the knowledge that we were not afforded.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by chika98: 11:32pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

@chika
Read d backup post.
Ps; if u ask 4 insults, u get em
I would be willing because aint selfish in giving it out.
Hope we cool.

I did read your post and it didn't make sense to me so i disagreed with you simple! You wanna go ahead and insult me because i don't agree with you?? Then be my guest!

There is nothing wrong with being a single parent or even being raised by one. It can make you a better person and wiser than your peers or it can mess you up for life!
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by 25more(f): 11:38pm On Dec 02, 2008
sistawoman:

I don't think we really want to debate whether single parenthood or double parenthood is better because we all know that having two is better than one.  

But the truth of the matter is most responsible single parents throw their lives into their children and work doubly hard to make up for the missing parent.  

Like in our house my boys cook, clean, wash clothes, take out the trash, cut the grass, etc.  They did not learn these things on their own but by doing them side by side with me.  All of this quality time is used to teach.  

I never let an opportunity slip by w/o teaching them something, even if we are sitting down and watching TV or riding in the car, there is a life lesson to be learned.  Because as single parents we know the chips and statics are stacked against us the responsible ones make every effort not to have our kids repeat our mistakes and make sure they have all the knowledge that we were not afforded.


i wasnt arguing about single parents being irresponsible and 2 parent being the other. neither was i condenming single parenthood, as with everything there are always an execption . some single parents are very responsible and have more time to be with their kids. but i still stand my on position kids would learn more from their parents when they have two of them. they are certain things a father can teach his boys and they will listen and understand from him, and the same with the girls and their mothers. and there things mothers would teach their boys that will just listen and dnt apply to their lives and fathers and their girls too.    and many other things so this is just one of the reasons i believe in my position.
Re: Love, Respect And Protect Our Girls And Women Before It Is Too Late by 25more(f): 11:41pm On Dec 02, 2008
Deshannel:

@25
How old r u by d way?


what has age got to do with this mister?

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