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8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married - Romance - Nairaland

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8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by stevewale(m): 5:45pm On Feb 27, 2015
Don't do these 8 things in a non-committal relationship because, though love is spontaneous and doesn’t hold back, it pays to be cautious, especially when there is no formal commitment from the so-called lover.

Love is sharing, caring and living for and with someone.

Most people will agree also that falling in love, finding love, is getting more and more difficult – with most people preferring to go for physical relationships of sex without emotions.

What this means is that staying in a relationship for long is almost a dream.

A few days of sex and seeming love end in bitterness and you’re in the love market again.

This is why, even when the relationship seems perfect, there are some things you must never do for that person — at least not until you’re wedded or there’s a binding document in place.

Love is about giving in and giving up a few things, but…

1. Don’t change your personality. Now, they say you should change for the one you love. Yes, that is true. But when the changing comes from you alone and it seems like you’re being re-manufactured, then something is wrong. No man or woman should attempt to change you entirely, unless you really have bad habits. Aside this, in the event that you’re separated, the hurt will be worsened by the fact you won’t recognise yourself. You’ll be nothing without that person. A person who loves you must accept the real you.

2. Don’t abandon your dreams: This is another one you should be careful about. Two people in love ca exist without killing each other’s dreams. It is a good thing for both of you to alter your careers and dreams to accommodate each other. But there is a limit. A true lover would aid your dream, ask you to abandon it. Work out a middle way. If you lose your dream for a relationship that is not yet solid, marriage especially, sorry will be your consolation when it ends.

3. Don’t abandon your friends and family. Hmmm, it really is sad that some people let love kill their relationships with kith and kin that they had before meeting their lover. They do not realise that friends are the only thing you can fall back to when you hit life’s road bumps. If a lover makes it a case to break your link to friends and family, please exit. They should find a way to accommodate your friends. If you lose your friends to that relationship, what happens if it ends?

4. Don’t set up businesses or share details of official information. Many people think it is love to expose their entire business plans and financial information to a supposed lover. But this is dangerous. A lot of people ‘love’ just to deceive and maybe swindle. If they have access to sensitive official details, like ATM card pins, internet bank passwords, property document details, etc, you are exposed to danger!

5. Don’t become a donor agency. Lovers should help each other, morally and financially. However, don’t be saddled to a leech, a tick who only feeds off you. You’re not a bank account or donor agency to anyone. As you give, make sure it’s reasonable, and for genuine needs. A lover who always returns for more is a gold-digger, a fraud that you don’t need. Small money gifts are cool, but should not become the norm and basis of love.

6. Don’t give unofficial loans, bad personal investments. Loans are relationship killers. If a lover wants huge sums of money from you, be wise and make it legal. At worst, make sure the money is deposited to his/her bank account, to leave a trail that can be used to retrieve it in case you guys fight. To withdraw N200,000 and give to your lover in cash as a loan is not wise. Instead, transfer via bank and write ‘loan’. If the money is big a signed IOU might be necessary. Also avoid foolish investments like setting up businesses or funding projects without legal documents. This may look rigid, but many people have killed ex-lovers because they could not retrieve their ‘investments’.

7. Don’t give unfettered access to private emails and social media accounts. In these modern times, social media accounts are very sensitive. It should be as personal as possible. Making it a public affair for a transient lover is bad, bad and bad. Imagine the damage they could do if you break up? He or she could for example lock you out of your own account or even send out compromising messages through your account.

8. Don’t reveal compromising information or damaging materials. When we fall in love, there is the temptation to talk too much, way too much than we need to. There should a lot of discussion between people in a relationship. But some things should never be said to some people who are not yet fully committed to a relationship. Sharing intimate secrets will put you up for future attacks. Ex-lovers are fond of sharing demining information, like nudes or private talks.


Love doesn’t hold back, it is spontaneous, it is forgiving and every other good thing.

But it pays to be cautious, especially when there is no formal commitment from so-called lover.

To be in love is to love with wisdom and caution…

source: http://pulse.ng/hotpulse/sex-and-love-8-things-you-should-never-do-for-a-lover-you-ve-not-married-id3522143.html?utm_campaign=daily-2015-02-27&utm_medium=email&utm_source=sex-and-love-8-things-you-should-never-do-for-a-lover-you-ve-not-married

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Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by redmist(m): 5:47pm On Feb 27, 2015
OK I gerrit... all we see everyday are 10 things you should do,20 things you shouldn't do... meanwhile FTC

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 5:51pm On Feb 27, 2015
(9) don't have sex before marriage,op is like you forget dat important one or are you scared of barshing?

78 Likes 3 Shares

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Basildvalour(m): 5:51pm On Feb 27, 2015
Even after you find out that the girl is a bisexual and because you love her, you dedicate your time to make her change...Shouldn't she try change her personality?

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Testerfuze(m): 6:22pm On Feb 27, 2015
Andrew114:
(9) don't have sex before marriage,op is like you forget dat important one or are you scared of barshing?
Can you buy a no-testing car for a large amount of money...and if the car no good there's no chance to change it again oo,how bout dat

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 6:24pm On Feb 27, 2015
Testerfuze:

Can you buy a no-testing car for a large amount of money...and if the car no good there's no chance to change it again oo,how bout dat
no ofcorse i would taste the car before buying it but the question is,are women and girls cars?just yes or no.

41 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Sarimah(f): 6:27pm On Feb 27, 2015
noted angry
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by MzzTega(f): 6:29pm On Feb 27, 2015
Don't,Dont,Don'ts........*sighs*
Ok,noted!
Romance section AKA Guidance and Counselling section.
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 6:30pm On Feb 27, 2015
recycled thread!!! angry
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Tashaamania(f): 6:34pm On Feb 27, 2015
MzzTega:
Don't,Dont,Don'ts........*sighs*
Romance section AKA Guidance and Counselling section.
the thing tire me sef
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Testerfuze(m): 6:37pm On Feb 27, 2015
Andrew114:
no ofcorse i would taste the car before buying it but the question is,are women and girls cars?just yes or no.
They are more delicate than cars sef,once you get into it....they ent no goin back,without checkin her out I might actually get a partner who sexually we ent compartible I know most people here will be like "is it all about sex" no its not buh its also a fundamental thing which makes relationships last long together with trust,understanding and God then there's no way you'll fail



And to answer your question...no,girls aren't cars.

3 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by benuejosh: 6:38pm On Feb 27, 2015
true talk
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by woodboi(m): 7:01pm On Feb 27, 2015
The one dat seems to touch me most is the friends part... I don't knw why people can't balance chemistry gone wide with the people around them. You've been with folks that care and watch over you for years, suddenly u meet someone and every1 dat seems to matter to you becomes less in your eyes, some f**lish peeps even expect you to understand until wen tins go wrong, dey start looking for someone to console them.

Here is d moral: Neva trade the role of ur family or friends for any1, until you are crystal clear about where both of you are heading...

6 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by ivyT(f): 7:54pm On Feb 27, 2015
Testerfuze:

Can you buy a no-testing car for a large amount of money...and if the car no good there's no chance to change it again oo,how bout dat


Oh pls! that's so archaic

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 8:32pm On Feb 27, 2015
Testerfuze:

They are more delicate than cars sef,once you get into it....they ent no goin back,without checkin her out I might actually get a partner who sexually we ent compartible I know most people here will be like "is it all about sex" no its not buh its also a fundamental thing which makes relationships last long together with trust,understanding and God then there's no way you'll fail



And to answer your question...no,girls aren't cars.
u just mention God as one of the foundermental require to keep a relationship but the question is,do God support this tasting(sex before marriage)?

6 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 8:45pm On Feb 27, 2015
ivyT:



Oh pls! that's so archaic
So when do you think is the right time to start having sex with someone you're dating?

1. As soon as you feel the sparks
2. As soon as he shows commitment.
3 After marriage.


Commitment would be either getting engaged or meeting each others parents and talks about marriage.

I'd love to have your opinion @ivyT

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by 5p1naz(m): 11:43am On Feb 28, 2015
Ok
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by jeeqaa7(m): 11:44am On Feb 28, 2015
It takes the Grace of God to be FTC... Even with d app which seems a ploy to prevent me from being FTC. I thank my fone that vibrates on its own wen a new thread is posted or when it is about to be posted ... Still yet some pple have already commented even b4 d thresd is typed ..


There is God

Vote amb val nkemjika for president 2015..
Change is wah we need

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 11:44am On Feb 28, 2015
undecided


OP I HOPE THOSE SILLY NIGERIAN GIRLS CAN READ AND UNDERSTAND YOUR THREAD. MOST OF THEM ARE THIEVES AND SEE RELATIONSHIP WITH SOME ONE NOT YET MARRIED TO THEM AS A POVERTY ALLEVIATION PROGRAM. NIGERIAN LADIES ARE THE MOST MONEY HUNGRY LADIES IN THE WORLD. THIS IS EVIDENT WITH THE RECENT DIVORCE RATE COS MANY MEN ARE BEGINNING TO SEE THAT GETTING MARRIED TO A NIGERIAN LADY IS A REAL SET BACK TO ONE'S PROGRESS IN LIFE

#TEAM FOREIGN GIRLS cool

7 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by jeeqaa7(m): 11:44am On Feb 28, 2015
Even in marriage ! Once una never get pikin... Don't tell her Jack! B4 she go kee you take over the whole thing #womensha
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by njuwo(m): 11:44am On Feb 28, 2015
Op, your name is correction after class work, you are correct, give me the prick village to add, okay prick village granted. Here is my addition to the topic; Don't allow he or she to see your unclothedness. Don't sleep with he or she. As a man don't allow he or she to see your tiger wood. As a woman don't allow him to swim in your river benue. Thank you, your one and only MC Ofego. God bless!

2 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by GlorifiedTunde(m): 11:44am On Feb 28, 2015
But lovers are really BLIND these days oo undecided

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 11:44am On Feb 28, 2015
cool Don't tear her punny and leave her
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Dyt(f): 11:45am On Feb 28, 2015
Don't sing and dance
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Sijo01(f): 11:45am On Feb 28, 2015
Don't cohabit.!!!

2 Likes

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Lifebender(m): 11:45am On Feb 28, 2015
Ok
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by KingEbukasBlog(m): 11:45am On Feb 28, 2015
nice
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by Nobody: 11:46am On Feb 28, 2015
J

1 Like

Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by NotNairalandi(m): 11:48am On Feb 28, 2015
I am guilty of none!.......

Make I continue my good work.

Azikiwe Ebele till two thousand and 19!
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by BestNaija(m): 11:48am On Feb 28, 2015
really?
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by lollystiver(m): 11:48am On Feb 28, 2015
Owk we hear
Re: 8 Things You Should Never Do For A Lover You’ve Not Married by gurunlocker: 11:51am On Feb 28, 2015
I was expecting to see 'don't have sex'.... I for say make thunder fire op left yansh

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