Asalam alaekum,

One of the most rewarding and loving
relationships one can have is the mother and
child relationship. But what happens when this
bond goes awry? What can happen when a
mother tries to parent her child while under
the stress of depression, domestic abuse,
marital problems, little or no support networks,
or substance abuse? What if the mother has a
child that is difficult to manage, or one that
has a mental, physical or behavioral handicap?
What about the mother who was brought up
learning that the only and best way to train
her child is to use beatings that leave welts
and bruises? The awful outcome can be child
physical abuse.

According to the American Humane
Association, child physical abuse is the “non-
accidental trauma or physical injury caused by
punching, beating, kicking, biting, burning or
otherwise harming a child.” The association
adds that child physical abuse is often caused
by parents using “inappropriate or excessive
physical discipline” when angry. An incensed
parent is less likely to be aware of the
magnitude of her hitting, explains the
American Humane Association.

Knowing what child physical abuse is can be
the first step in identifying whether this
affliction has become a part of your family.
But knowing what it is and avoiding it do not
always go hand in hand. Often, mothers need
to be taught that there are alternative ways of
disciplining their children that avoid hitting
completely. They also need to know what they
can do to help stay in control of themselves
during discipline episodes.

Here are 5 ways to discipline your child
without hitting or shouting:

1. Complement or praise your child when
you see her cooperating or obeying. This
is one of the best ways to get your child
to repeat proper behavior.

2. Spend quality and quantity time with your
child to develop a loving relationship.
When your child enjoys your company
and cares about how you feel about him/
her, she will be more inclined to follow
your instructions.

3. When your child is upset, let her know
you understand how she feels. Once you
acknowledge her feelings, she will be
more willing to comply with your
demands.

4. Learn the stages of development for
your child. You might find that what you
consider misbehavior may simply be
normal childhood behavior.

5. Remember to teach by example. If you
want your children to talk out their
problems with their siblings rather than
fight them out, do the same with your
spouse and children.

Here are 5 ways to discipline yourself when
you feel you are losing control:

1. Phone a friend or family member for
comfort, advice or merely to blow off
steam.

2. If your children are already supervised,
take a walk.

3. Browse through a magazine or
newspaper; surf the internet.

4. Put yourself into your child’s position and
think about how you would feel if
someone responded to you in a violent
and hostile manner.

5. Retreat to your room to read or listen to
Quran.

6. Seek refuge in Allah from Shaitan.
No household is immune from experiencing
child physical abuse. It occurs in Muslim
homes as well as non-Muslim families.
Knowing how to minimize the risk factors and
enacting preventive behaviors can be a
successful approach to preventing child
physical abuse in your family.

For more information on preventing child
physical abuse, visit the following website:
www.childhelp.org

Source: blog.islamiconlineuniversity.com/what-is-child-physical-abuse/