Just the words, break up, indicate a situation riddled with impending pain and loss. Even if both parties involved agree it is in their best interests to part romantic ways, there is still a certain amount of loss attached. The best way to approach a break up is to offer the person, to the best of your ability, a clean and clear separation. While there is no definitive way to do this, hear are a few guidelines that may help you.

#1 - Specific Reasons
Don't let them wonder what went wrong. Give them the exact specific reason why you want to break up. It will give them an opportunity to really evaluate what they've done to contribute to the demise of the relationship, and hopefully apply their knowledge to their next one.

#2 - Where To Do It
If you think they will be terribly upset, try a public place that will afford you some privacy, but will deter your partner from possibly "acting up." If at all possible, try to do it some place you can be alone to really talk things through. Avoid places that contain happy memories from your relationship. You don't want to spoil them.

#3 - How To Do It
While following guideline #1 is important, you also want to make sure you are not damaging their ego either. Make it clear to them that the relationship isn't working for you both because you expect different things from the relationship, or that you've reached a line that you don't feel you can cross back over. Take extra care in your choice of wording, but never lie.

#4 - After The Break Up
Your first meetings after a break up can be strained, at best. If you don't feel you'll be comfortable being around them until your emotions are more under control, try a cold turkey break up. Agree neither of you will have contact with each other for an agreed amount of time. Make sure you agree on the set amount of time during the break up process, or the ideal of remaining friends after may diminish.

Your other option is to try a sliding scale approach. Agree to only call or see each other once or twice a week, and slowly narrow it down from there. Agree not to talk about certain things like wishing you were back together, or whether you are seeing anyone new, etc.

If you must remain in contact with them because of school, work or family it is important to remain mature about the situation. Don't run out and date everyone. Allow your partner some breathing room and time to digest their newly found situation. Also, avoid gossiping about what went wrong. It just makes everything ugly.

Whats ur say Ya'll,

tell them ooooo!!!!

Nice its easier theoretically than practically.
Hope u know that emotions are invovled.
Easier said than Done.
Is there anything called mutual seperation?
Goodluck to all that need the Tips.

I wish I found this before I went on a psycho trip (after seeing his party pics online, and being told he was flirting with another girl the same say we broke up) I completely went back on our word of remaining friends, I ignored him message, and only contacted him 20 days after we broke up. 'Til this day the communication is the weirdest thing ever, wait one day for a reply, 5, or maybe 9 when I sure know the guy checks his email daily.

Now I've calmed down even if he played me, me not being involved with him anymore as dissolved the anger, so I don't care and actually wouldn't mind reaching some sort of amiacable agreement of friendship, but the guy's ego is hurt so he's probably 'making the girl' (me) suffer. Now I have no choice but to leave the friendship idea completely,

And yet another hole in my contacts list.

People should never agree to being friends if there are still feelings involved from one side anyway topup

And why would that be? Being in a serious relationship is like being in a relationship with your best friend of opposite sex, except that the opposite sex means you can get close on a sexual level too ,

Now why would you want to lose a friend, there must have been a reason you went out with the guy in the first place, (well, unless the guy/girl was a jerk)

topup:

And why would that be? Being in a serious relationship is like being in a relationship with your best friend of opposite sex, except that the opposite sex means you can get close on a sexual level too ,

Now why would you want to lose a friend, there must have been a reason you went out with the guy in the first place, (well, unless the guy/girl was a jerk)

did you miss where I said "if you still have feelings". If one person still wants a relationship and the other do3snt, do you truly believe they can last as "friends"

Only time you can be friends with an ex is if he starts dating someone and you're completely fine with it to the point he can even talk to you about the relationship

Til then, people really shouldnt fool themselves.

KarmaMod:

did you miss where I said "if you still have feelings". If one person still wants a relationship and the other do3snt, do you truly believe they can last as "friends"

Only time you can be friends with an ex is if he starts dating someone and you're completely fine with it to the point he can even talk to you about the relationship

Til then, people really shouldnt fool themselves.

No I didn't miss the part. I read it and still came to the same conclusion. I still believe that you should always agree to be friends because when time passes the feelings usually subside as you find someone else, or put the whole thing in perspective, also you get over the anger, or hurt, time heals. So then this is the time when you wish you hadn't told your ex to 'f***' for messing with you, or you 'don't want anything to do' with him in your life ever again.

I had feelings for my ex, but now I wish I wasn't so clouded by them that I refused his friendship, because now that I've forgiven him, I don't want an enemy,

Never said to burn bridges. Just said to not agree to being friends UNLESS you are ready to hear about other women in his life.

You dont have to say "to hell with you", just dont contact communicate til you know you are ready. and people tend to rush and think everything is fine yet when he starts talking about his new relationship they start to freak out

Hmm, so if that is the advisable option, why is it, I am being treated like the b**** because I wasn't ready to reciprocate the friendship. And now that I am ready he is ignoring me?

I think there's nothing wrong with telling the guy that you want to be friends, but it'll take time and it won't just snap like that into place. That way you get time to yourself if you wish and he can understand that this is 'the time' you mentioned. I said exactly this and the thing still back fired. Guy never cared to begin with tbh. It all depends on the person. If the ex is a reasonable guy/girl they should be willing to work things through. The relationship doesn't just end after it ends . Most people think it does but unless you truly delete the person from your life, you're still having some sort of relationship with them whether it be a hate/enemy type relationship, friendship or potential rekindling the love type relationship

topup what's your email. wanna send you something

Damn, is today National Break Up Day??

Easier said than done

topup:
And why would that be? Being in a serious relationship is like being in a relationship with your best friend of opposite sex, except that the opposite sex means you can get close on a sexual level too ,

Now why would you want to lose a friend, there must have been a reason you went out with the guy in the first place, (well, unless the guy/girl was a jerk)

Foolish people only will still need friendship after a breakup,how will you remain friends with someone that broke your heart?

Why go through all these steps when I can just say "Hey guy am fed up with you I need a break" ?