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Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. - Romance - Nairaland

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Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BeloHorizonte14: 5:50pm On May 08, 2015
A friend of mine was recently approached by a lady. He likes her,she likes him too.
But the problem is he has fears; is there any psychological/emotional implication? What are the challenges involved; ups and downs?

Is there any difference between a relationship initiated by a lady and the one a guy initiated?
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by abebio: 5:51pm On May 08, 2015
free punnany
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by sadiqcholel: 5:56pm On May 08, 2015
.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 6:00pm On May 08, 2015
First of all, I see nothing wrong in a lady approaching a guy or a lady initializing a relationship.
It's that African mentality that we carry about that would make us think differently

That being said in the case of your friend I would also say there is nothing wrong in the lady approaching him, but there is a clause.
If he knew the lady for some time as a mere friend or she works around where he works, lives in his neighborhood or is someone that he already knew before then I would say there is nothing to worry about.

But if he never knew her, never met her and she just approached him from no where and asked him out then I'd advise he applied caution.

You said he is already liking the lady and the lady says she likes him. Well, If the love she has for him is genuine, then good for the both of them.
But there is no way to tell if the lady is saying the truth, and that's why I advise he be care. He should follow his heart and use his brains

Is your friend religious? If he is I would also advise he pray about it. It helps.
Entering into a relationship with someone is a very critical part of ones life and before making such decisions, one should apply wisdom, care and in most cases, prayers.

2 Likes

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by CountDracula(m): 6:02pm On May 08, 2015
There ar more dan one way to d market, so also it doesn't hav to b guys initiating relationships all d tym

1 Like

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Tallesty1(m): 6:11pm On May 08, 2015
missclasssy:
First of all, I see nothing wrong in a lady approaching a guy or a lady initializing a relationship.
It's that African mentality that we carry about that would make us think differently

That being said in the case of your friend I would also say there is nothing wrong in the lady approaching him, but there is a clause.
If he knew the lady for some time as a mere friend or she works around where he works, lives in his neighborhood or is someone that he already knew before then I would say there is nothing to worry about.

But if he never knew her, never met her and she just approached him from no where and asked him out then I'd advise he applied caution.

You said he is already liking the lady and the lady says she likes him. Well, If the love she has for him is genuine, then good for the both of them.
But there is no way to tell if the lady is saying the truth, and that's why I advise he be care. He should follow his heart and use his brains

Is your friend religious? If he is I would also advise he pray about it. It helps.
Entering into a relationship with someone is a very critical part of ones life and before making such decisions, one should apply wisdom, care and in most cases, prayers.
There's nothing like African mentality here. It is same in the whole world.

Personally I have dated women that approached me first, not one, not two and I have vowed to never try it again reason being that Every lady who's got the balls to ask a guy out has cheating tendencies


She will definitely port when she meets a hotter guy.

5 Likes

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BankManager(m): 6:12pm On May 08, 2015
U're always gonna be treated like a king till u get tired...
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Tapout(m): 6:41pm On May 08, 2015
Tallesty1:
There's nothing like African mentality here. It is same in the whole world.

Personally I have dated women that approached me first, not one, not two and I have vowed to never try it again reason being that Every lady who's got the balls to ask a guy out has cheating tendencies


She will definitely port when she meets a hotter guy.



so true @ bolded

2 Likes

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Summer1(f): 7:10pm On May 08, 2015
As a woman,I can't exceed d limits of admiration.. if I admire u, all I can wish for is that u notice me too.. but walking up to d guy to declare interest is not womanly at all.. African mentality or not, it doesn't portray a responsible picture of a lady..
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 7:33pm On May 08, 2015
Hmmm.I have never approach any lady, not that am charming or possess an attractive aura to attract girls.lol...before you people enter me ..But the girls have dated approached me and I took them for granted,always playing with their emotions
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 7:38pm On May 08, 2015
What makes you think it does not portray a responsible picture of a lady.Anyway your opinion
Summer1:
As a woman,I can't exceed d limits of admiration.. if I admire u, all I can wish for is that u notice me too.. but walking up to d guy to declare interest is not womanly at all.. African mentality or not, it doesn't portray a responsible picture of a lady..

2 Likes

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by idu1(m): 7:48pm On May 08, 2015
missclasssy:
First of all, I see nothing wrong in a lady approaching a guy or a lady initializing a relationship.
It's that African mentality that we carry about that would make us think differently

That being said in the case of your friend I would also say there is nothing wrong in the lady approaching him, but there is a clause.
If he knew the lady for some time as a mere friend or she works around where he works, lives in his neighborhood or is someone that he already knew before then I would say there is nothing to worry about.

But if he never knew her, never met her and she just approached him from no where and asked him out then I'd advise he applied caution.

You said he is already liking the lady and the lady says she likes him. Well, If the love she has for him is genuine, then good for the both of them.
But there is no way to tell if the lady is saying the truth, and that's why I advise he be care. He should follow his heart and use his brains

Is your friend religious? If he is I would also advise he pray about it. It helps.
Entering into a relationship with someone is a very critical part of ones life and before making such decisions, one should apply wisdom, care and in most cases, prayers.
are contesting for miss nairaland?
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 7:56pm On May 08, 2015
idu1:
are contesting for miss nairaland?

No, I am not.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 8:23pm On May 08, 2015
missclasssy:
First of all, I see nothing wrong in a lady approaching a guy or a lady initializing a relationship.
It's that African mentality that we carry about that would make us think differently

That being said in the case of your friend I would also say there is nothing wrong in the lady approaching him, but there is a clause.
If he knew the lady for some time as a mere friend or she works around where he works, lives in his neighborhood or is someone that he already knew before then I would say there is nothing to worry about.

But if he never knew her, never met her and she just approached him from no where and asked him out then I'd advise he applied caution.

You said he is already liking the lady and the lady says she likes him. Well, If the love she has for him is genuine, then good for the both of them.
But there is no way to tell if the lady is saying the truth, and that's why I advise he be care. He should follow his heart and use his brains

Is your friend religious? If he is I would also advise he pray about it. It helps.
Entering into a relationship with someone is a very critical part of ones life and before making such decisions, one should apply wisdom, care and in most cases, prayers.
Ma'am I have been reading your comments from afar. I must confess that you are very intelligent.. Your comments are so on point. . Keep the flag flying high. .
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 8:39pm On May 08, 2015
Daninya11:

Ma'am I have been reading your comments from afar. I must confess that you are very intelligent.. Your comments are so on point. . Keep the flag flying high. .

Thanks.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by kay9(m): 8:45pm On May 08, 2015
missclasssy:
First of all, I see nothing wrong in a lady approaching a guy or a lady initializing a relationship.
It's that African mentality that we carry about that would make us think differently

That being said in the case of your friend I would also say there is nothing wrong in the lady approaching him, but there is a clause.
If he knew the lady for some time as a mere friend or she works around where he works, lives in his neighborhood or is someone that he already knew before then I would say there is nothing to worry about.

But if he never knew her, never met her and she just approached him from no where and asked him out then I'd advise he applied caution.

You said he is already liking the lady and the lady says she likes him. Well, If the love she has for him is genuine, then good for the both of them.
But there is no way to tell if the lady is saying the truth, and that's why I advise he be care. He should follow his heart and use his brains

Is your friend religious? If he is I would also advise he pray about it. It helps.
Entering into a relationship with someone is a very critical part of ones life and before making such decisions, one should apply wisdom, care and in most cases, prayers.

Ma'am your comment scores 10/10. Abeg are u married?
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by chigoizie7(m): 8:53pm On May 08, 2015
Me wey de find person wey go love me for who I am, nd this one come use her hand toast me, she will definitely take and worship me like. King, I won't ever even beg for (to to)
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Nobody: 8:54pm On May 08, 2015
kay9:


Ma'am your comment scores 10/10. Abeg are u married?

No, I am not.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Ogatitus: 9:04pm On May 08, 2015
Summer1:
As a woman,I can't exceed d limits of admiration.. if I admire u, all I can wish for is that u notice me too.. but walking up to d guy to declare interest is not womanly at all.. African mentality or not, it doesn't portray a responsible picture of a lady..

I beg to disagree. There's absolutely nothing "unwomanly" about approaching a man. It all depends on the maturity level of both parties.

Earlier this year a colleague approached me and said she liked me a lot and can't help thinking abt me. Yes, @first i was surprised cos i wasn't expecting that. But I never for once thought her cheap, rather i saw her as a matured lady that is not scared to voice her mind.

So it all depends on the parties involved. A real man will never disrespect a lady just because she approached him first.

2 Likes

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by kay9(m): 9:08pm On May 08, 2015
missclasssy:


No, I am not.

Correct! Please PM me your number and bbm pin sharpish. We have family things to discuss.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Deiok(m): 9:28pm On May 08, 2015
Smh for the poster above me.

@op i dont see anything wrong in a lady approaching a guy to ask him out. It only shows how bold and confident the lady is.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BeloHorizonte14: 11:02pm On May 08, 2015
missclasssy:
First of all, I see nothing wrong in a lady approaching a guy or a lady initializing a relationship.
It's that African mentality that we carry about that would make us think differently

That being said in the case of your friend I would also say there is nothing wrong in the lady approaching him, but there is a clause.
If he knew the lady for some time as a mere friend or she works around where he works, lives in his neighborhood or is someone that he already knew before then I would say there is nothing to worry about.

But if he never knew her, never met her and she just approached him from no where and asked him out then I'd advise he applied caution.

You said he is already liking the lady and the lady says she likes him. Well, If the love she has for him is genuine, then good for the both of them.
But there is no way to tell if the lady is saying the truth, and that's why I advise he be care. He should follow his heart and use his brains

Is your friend religious? If he is I would also advise he pray about it. It helps.
Entering into a relationship with someone is a very critical part of ones life and before making such decisions, one should apply wisdom, care and in most cases, prayers.
Thank you so very much. My friend isn't that religious.

Please,what about the boyfriend/girl friend role/responsibility?
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Youngpo413: 11:12pm On May 08, 2015
Summer1:
As a woman,I can't exceed d limits of admiration.. if I admire u, all I can wish for is that u notice me too.. but walking up to d guy to declare interest is not womanly at all.. African mentality or not, it doesn't portray a responsible picture of a lady..
correct babe.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Brugo(m): 11:47pm On May 08, 2015
.



Some women initiate then step back to let you drive the relationship. These women are very smart.

Some other women initiate and take the reigns of the relationship. A man can't be a man with this sort.

Women should learn to allow men lead in a relationship even if the lady approached him first.



.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BeloHorizonte14: 11:48pm On May 08, 2015
Tallesty1:
There's nothing like African mentality here. It is same in the whole world.

Personally I have dated women that approached me first, not one, not two and I have vowed to never try it again reason being that Every lady who's got the balls to ask a guy out has cheating tendencies


She will definitely port when she meets a hotter guy.
Boss,this is your post is scary to me. But the girl loves the guy.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BeloHorizonte14: 11:52pm On May 08, 2015
Brugo:
.



Some women initiate then step back to let you drive the relationship. These women are very smart.

Some other women initiate and take the reigns of the relationship. A man can't be a man with this sort.

Women should learn to allow men lead in a relationship even if the lady approached him first.



.
i like your post. Thank you.

But then again,how does the guy drive the relationship,especially if the guy is a shy/introverted person?
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BeloHorizonte14: 11:52pm On May 08, 2015
Brugo:
.



Some women initiate then step back to let you drive the relationship. These women are very smart.

Some other women initiate and take the reigns of the relationship. A man can't be a man with this sort.

Women should learn to allow men lead in a relationship even if the lady approached him first.



.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Youngpo413: 11:55pm On May 08, 2015
Deiok:
Smh for the poster above me.

@op i dont see anything wrong in a lady approaching a guy to ask him out. It only shows how bold and confident the lady is.
can you trust such a lady?do you know how many men she had approached before you?such ladies are shameless cheap prostitutes,they only deserve to be used and dumped.

1 Like

Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Brugo(m): 12:02am On May 09, 2015
BeloHorizonte14:
i like your post. Thank you.

But then again,how does the guy drive the relationship,especially if the guy is a shy/introverted person?

When he talks to her, he must say just enough. Too much and she'll take him for granted. Too little and she'll take him for a dull Nigga or a malicious boyfriend.

You may ask for her opinion only 30% of the time. Other times, just go ahead with your plans.

Be firm.
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by Ucheosefoh(m): 12:47am On May 09, 2015
Tallesty1:
There's nothing like African mentality here. It is same in the whole world.

Personally I have dated women that approached me first, not one, not two and I have vowed to never try it again reason being that Every lady who's got the balls to ask a guy out has cheating tendencies


She will definitely port when she meets a hotter guy.
You have a point sha but girl wey go port go port if you like chase am for five years if she meet a hotter guy she go port shapely like Saka
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by BeloHorizonte14: 3:14am On May 09, 2015
Brugo:


When he talks to her, he must say just enough. Too much and she'll take him for granted. Too little and she'll take him for a dull Nigga or a malicious boyfriend.

You may ask for her opinion only 30% of the time. Other times, just go ahead with your plans.

Be firm.
Like what kind of talk does one engage a lady in?
Re: Relationship With A Lady Who Approached You. by kay9(m): 10:36am On May 09, 2015
All this talk about women who initiate relationships being unreliable just plain irritates me - you guys just don't give women enough credit. And the worst is, the women folk can't be bothered to correct that impression. Here's a fact of life: a woman who will "port", will "port"; whether it was you who approached her, or she approached you, has absolutely nothing to do it. And see, let's fashi all this woman-phobic line of thought sef; what about the guys? Last I checked neither me nor my band of drinking buddies passed the "perfect gentleman" test. Any guy that wants a perfect woman should become perfect first.

All I'm saying is, nothing in life is absolute; that 80% of women who initiate relationships end up cheating (and thats not even true!) doesn't mean that the one who approaches you will cheat. Live free, bro.

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