damn this lekki traffic why did fuel scarcity have to join forces this annoyance hell on the highway I tell you! why did my niece have to crave ice-cream today of all days. special pineapple banana chocolate delight that only one shop in the whole of lagos sold and this shop just happens to be on the other side of town. guess who providence entrusted with this noble deed of satisfying this urgent craving? no alomos for guessing right yes me but let me fair it wasn't just my niece who wanted ice-cream. my pregnant older sister who am staying with also decided she wants pizza with the weirdest toppings known to creation. her heavy pregnancy (7 months on) gives her the ready excuse to send me on these 'missions'. hussy boo (don't ask) is away on office assignment so in his absence I'm the handyman, cook, cleaner you name it. my sisters stubborn refusal to hire a house-help 'why should we waste money on hiring help when I can do it I'm not lazy' really irritated me that said I don't mind the chores that much (don't tell her!) I'm really close to my sister and there's nothing I wouldn't do (that is moral and legal o) to make her happy. same goes for my niece jasmine adejoke ayomipo or lil jj as I call her. my sisters first born the real madam of the house and a three year old energizer bunny full of activity running all morning and night but the sweetest thing I know. her cherubic smile on her little chubby face is just so adorable not to talk of those puppy eyes that no person can say no to. so between my love for my sister and niece I'm trapped in this salon car driving lil jj to the new flashy mall just after the second roundabout off lekki. readers don't be deceived the inner selfish male chauvinist in me screams out in protest when doing such tasks 'guy na only u waka come wey ur mama born?' 'bros gather ursef o life dey for you to enjoy o' its usually at that point that my goody two shoes conscience kicks in and puts me back on the narrow path of selfless mumulility

...to be continued

uncle dare are we there yet? my niece's cute voice pierces my thought process. no jj don't worry will be there before you know it I then pop in a patoranking cd in the car cd player to distract her. always cracks me up hearing her trying to sing along to patoranking songs sounding like she ingested helium gas. anyway as we drive along I casually look to my right and what I see makes me feel like stopping the car to get out and kneel on the road to give thanks for what my eyes have just sighted. I kid you not but guys if your eye sef jam wetin I see you go do worse if goddesses existed then I'm sure the babe I'm seeing is their inspiration. face that can make bitter kola sweet, skin without blemish like its a bible memory verse light brown sparkling, body contoured to perfection the future full and bright almost choking your eye comot while the history loaded and full with humanities dreams that your ancestors would long for (if you know watta mean wink). she was just standing by the road side there in her purple pencil neck skirt and black body hug top. her silky black hair moving lightly against the wind men I can't miss out. as a sharp guy I weave the car from the far left lane to the right inspite of the car honking and vehicles blocking my path due to the existing traffic jam I manage to drive my way through. just as I'm nearing the babe and start to sing a victory a shrieking siren sound bursts my bubble. a convoy of gun totting police men in there hilux vans swerve me off the road. fortunately my strong hands keep the car steady as I park to the side of the express. I look on as the convoy drives off into the distance cursing under my breath the police men and whichever VIP or government official that are on that God forsaken convoy. just then I look for the mystery woman what! I can't see her anywhere how can someone disappear in seconds. I further curse the errant convoy and my luck. suddenly I remember my niece. jj are you ok as I look at her half worriedly yes uncle but aren't we getting ice cream again? at first I look on puzzled then shake my and laugh a little as I put the car into gear and drive on to our destination

.....to be continued