Make I no laff alone........
MY EXPERIENCE
I had just moved out of my parents house
and was sharing a room with my "friend". I had no idea he smoked weed, despite his suspicious movements and signature weed scent(abi na odour?) barely two weeks after moving in with him, my worst fears were confirmed as he started bringing home his weed smoking buddies and they would Occassionally roll
a wrap and smoke it right there in the room or mix the weed with beans or spagehtti.
Being a very curious person i always wondered what made them happy after smoking, so i decided to find
out for myself(wrong move)
It was a very hot day in february, a saturday i
think it was, my friend was out as usual. I searched
everywhere for his stash but couldn't find it so i decided to go and Get mine. I arrived the weed joint all sweaty and nervous, half expectingto get muged but nobody seemed to be aware of my presence there, they were all on different planets all expect one i concluded that he must be the seller so i approached him and the following conversation ensued:

Me: how far?
Weed seller: i dey
Me: i wan buy weed
Weed seller: how many parcel?
Me: parcel ke? Iro oo, na just small i need
Weed seller: laughs really hard. bolo leleyi sha(meaning this guy is a dunce oo)
Apparently, a parcel of weed is that small wrap, i didn't
know that. I thought it was something very large.
I gave him 1000 naira and he gave me a tiny wrap
of weed with a white paper, i was suprised when he gave me 950 as change. I couldn't beleive weed was that cheap.
On my way home, i decided not to smoke it but mix it with beans because i thought that it will be better that
way (another wrong move).
Long story short, i cooked beans and added the whole weed, ate it and called my friend, I told him ogbeni i just ate weed oo and nothing happened to me this one that you people will eat and be feeling funky, i don chop
am oo. My friend was like ehen you be strong man oo
I decided to take a quick nap before doing laundry, i woke up about 20 minutes later on the floor i was banging my head on the floor, and i couldn't stop, my
heart beat was so audible and fast, everything was extra
bright and extra loud.
-_-------_--------_------------_------------_---------_--------------
After a few minutes of head banging, i was able to get up from the floor, I felt as if i had just gained access to a part of my mind that I never knew existed previously, it was scary and cool at the same time. I could feel the blood flowing in my veins(you have to experience it to believe it. Though I strongly advise against it) i felt so uncomfortable in the room, it felt like i was in an oven suddenly a voice in my head whispered "ogbeni bo aso e joor" (off your clothes) i obeyed.
The voice came again oya sa re(now run) that was when i realised that the weed had taken effect so i decided to take a shower to see if it will calm me down, but the water felt so hot on my skin so hot i ran out of the bathroom.
I called my friend to see if he could help me make
sense of what was going on but he laughed at me,
he asked me the quantity of weed i took and i told him i
used a whole parcel, he said guyyyyy you don eff up if you no sleep in the next 30mins, you go mad oo go chemist make you go explain yourself.
By this time things had escalated, i had a severe itch at the back of my head that wouldn't go away nomatter
how hard i scratched and i was convinced that the
beating in my chest was an evil spirit that could only be killed with a punch. I ran to my neighbour champion and told him champion e jo e fun mi lese laya(champion pls punch me in the chest) ti e ba gbami lese laya mo ma ku oo(if you don't punch me i will die oo) he hissed and walked out having had enough of such nonsense from the boys in the boys quarters.
The voice in my head came again iwo na o de gba ara e lese laya abi o ti fe ku ni(why don't you punch yourself in the chest or do you want to die?) i punched and punched but there was no difference.
The house was getting hotter, the voice in my head was
getting louder, the itch in my head was getting
worse, and the evil spirit in my chest was getting
louder.
Then came the voice again oya ma sare lo(start running) so i started running but on getting outside in the sun, i felt so cold i was shivering but that didn't stop me from running(i would have given husain bolt a run for his money on that day).
On getting to the chemist, i realised i was bare footed, i told him i had a severe headache i needed something
to make me sleep immediately, he gave me the drug
and i chewed it right there in his presence, next i asked him to give me a drug for evil spirit, that was when he
realised something was wrong with me and chased me out.
I got back home and tried to sleep but my
heart beat wouldnt let me, so i ran back out this time
around to a nurse in the area, first thing she asked was kilode o wo bata ni?
(why don't you have your shoes on? I told her
jackie chan ti gba bata lowo mi (jackie chan collected my shoes) i was finally able to explain my situation to her and she took me in, tied something around my elbow and injected me directly in the vein. I passed out
immediately only to wake around 1 or 2am in the middle of the night with the worst kind of hunger I have ever felt in my life. I ate a whole loaf of butter field bread in one sitting without butter or tea.
I came home to a hero's welcome, my friend told
me e be like say your head no carry am but e go
better make you try am once more so you go dey use to it. The following day while the house was empty, I packed my Ghana must go and like the prodigal son in the bible I went back home to my parents. It's been a few years since that experience but the lesson I learnt is an unforgettable one. My curiosity hasn't gotten me in trouble again and my circle of friends have since changed.
Lol.......

CC: Lalasticlala

Wailing Wailer

u

E Be Like Say Na Oshogbo Weed!

The moral of the story is don't use drugs...

cool. can't wait to experience mine

So "Oya sa re wa gba" means "run come and take"?

That's all I learnt from your post; the meaning of 'sa re'

Next time na Yaba left you go wake up, tied to a bed and on admission for one year.

20pounds:
So "Oya sa re wa gba" means "run come and take"?

That's all I learnt from your post; the meaning of 'sa re'

Next time na Yaba left you go wake up, tied to a bed and on admission for one year.

Ogar, what makes a real man is ability to correct mistakes

Nah God save you, you for dey waka for road now with rag cloths and long dirty dada, dey pick dirty.

Exactly the same way it happened to me in 2003,gosh I thought I had gone mad. Instantly my network of friends changed. I still dey try one or two puff anytime I'm with niccurs. One/Two highest

U don't av to imitate anybody, be yourself! Next time u wanna try something new, start from the scratch

This used to be one of the funniest stories I ever read on NL and that was so many years back... It has been resurrected again, same words no editing. I didn't laugh dis time around. I read it to see if there's any difference but none.

We maybe it was resurrected for those who are new here and haven't read it b4.

phransix147:
This used to be one of the funniest stories I ever read on NL and that was so many years back... It has been resurrected again, same words no editing. I didn't laugh dis time around. I read it to see if there's any difference but none.

We maybe it was resurrected for those who are new here and haven't read it b4.

Ogar, we know you are an old man on Nairaland, some people are enjoying the story, did you pay anyone to write stories for you? Bad belle people

Hhehehehhehehehe Mehn My first time no bad reach ur own ohh. My first time me just enta school my guy MiMi com yarn me say G shisha dey ohh. We enta him car go buy flavor me go to buy Snack cos me dey hungry before i come Back him mix the flavor with SK. We blaze d shisha Finnish him and dem other guys come say make we waka small as we enta one uncompleted building na im MiMi come share us 1 wrap of SK each. Me no want dull so i follow d guys Blaze the tin. As we dey waka i come begin notice say my Left i dey Voluntarily close. We been be like 5 wey do d blaze 3 of us na Newbies One of d newbies wey name na Musty Miss road till we go look for am. As we enta back school na so so happy i just det feel. We play ball reach evening for school that day.

acenazt:
Hhehehehhehehehe Mehn My first time no bad reach ur own ohh. My first time me just enta school my guy MiMi com yarn me say G shisha dey ohh. We enta him car go buy flavor me go to buy Snack cos me dey hungry before i come Back him mix the flavor with SK. We blaze d shisha Finnish him and dem other guys come say make we waka small as we enta one uncompleted building na im MiMi come share us 1 wrap of SK each. Me no want dull so i follow d guys Blaze the tin. As we dey waka i come begin notice say my Left i dey Voluntarily close. We been be like 5 wey do d blaze 3 of us na Newbies One of d newbies wey name na Musty Miss road till we go look for am. As we enta back school na so so happy i just det feel. We play ball reach evening for school that day.

Hehehehe, bad guy, SK Vs Igboh, which one pass?

Nothing to share...

There'll never be a first time for me...

WailingWailer00:

Ogar, we know you are an old man on Nairaland, some people are enjoying the story, did you pay anyone to write stories for you? Bad belle people

Must u lie? Its not ur experience... Always give credit to the initial writer...

phransix147:


Must u lie? Its not ur experience... Always give credit to the initial writer...

Bleep off man

It was funny when it happened to my friend cus the guy don kolo. Na on and off madness, ask him what's the time and he says dem Never give me

Lwkmd.. You done suffer

We both rocked the same boat bro...you could have suppressed it with a saline solution(salt and luke warm water). Lol... Mine was also crazy then in school and only God knows y my shadow keep tickling me in the "head" at the back to be precise.started with the little tickling at the back of the head then an involuntary smile and happiness then everything just change like weather.. I showered, ran around naked tho @nite and did up to a thousand push up( no exaggeration). It was a crazy one that got me crying and praying to God to save me this time that I won't try it again... Ummmh naa lie cuz I still did it again and now tho I'm no smoker of sort buh I'm used to it now... Just curiosity stuffs!! Just trying different drugs shaaaa...

hahaha loz

Bambless1:
E Be Like Say Na Oshogbo Weed!

No na kwale weed

Very strong

So...I was young and heard dat weed make your hair grow fast,I heard different testimonies so I decided to try it
I bought 2 parcel mixed 1 with spirit and looked at the 2nd 1 for some tym I was like wetyn dy dis tin sef wey people dy smoke am dy happy
9 I say mah experiment small sef I wrapped it lite it and took a puff nothing happened
I was like wetyn come make dy dy preach against am so I smoked the whole tin.

I can remember very well it was raining and I was home alone ah no know how ah take reach out side next tin ah hear na on ur marks gt set go,come and cc me running like a mad man under the rain as if that was not enough I laid on d ground in 1 small puddle say I thinking I was in 1 olympic size swimming pool

Weed bad sha

So...I was young and heard dat weed make your hair grow fast,I heard different testimonies so I decided to try it
I bought 2 parcel mixed 1 with spirit and looked at the 2nd 1 for some tym I was like wetyn dy dis tin sef wey people dy smoke am dy happy
9 I say mah experiment small sef I wrapped it lite it and took a puff nothing happened
I was like wetyn come make dy dy preach against am so I smoked the whole tin.

I can remember very well it was raining and I was home alone ah no know how ah take reach out side next tin ah hear na on ur marks gt set go,come and cc me running like a mad man under the rain as if that was not enough I laid on d ground in 1 small puddle say I thinking I was in 1 olympic size swimming pool

Weed bad sha

done

mayorkyzo:
The moral of the story is don't use drugs...

Haba!! But Igbo no be drug O

Some dude posted this sometimes around last year, before the nairaland crash. So "Wannabe" this ain't you, give credit.

I no believe JOOR