How was your day fellow nairalanders?....I have been busy of late but this scene happened since saturday/sunday but i have not had a slice of chance to just do the writeup and this has been giving me a serious headache as to what I should do or the action I should take as it just confusing to me, here is the full details of what basically happened that has set me into this tight corner I happen to find my humble self.

On Saturday afternoon after a long week where I had worked my ass off I decided to chill out on and I was thinking of several options but coincidentally my homie, a childhood and family friend( he's a top model in the nigeria fashion industry) called me he was in lere and asked we should just hook up and talk and it been a long time and stuffs like that, then I agreed we meet at home then after a while then we could just go to the leisure mall(shoprite surulere) and have some chillinz at bheerhugz, we got there but before we entered into the leisure mall he said we should first pick some stuffs in shoprite, while we were inside shoprite I noticed he was having an eye conversation with someone but I was busy trying to make payment for what we bought, afterward I realized the eye and hand conversation had matured that he then got an approval from the so called person he was communicating with, he moved away and got closer to that person and then collected the phone number. While we got out of the mall and about to use the stair case to go to leisure mall instead of using the outside I noticed he waved to someone and then I had a very close and clear view of the person he had been flirting with in the mall and to my unexpected and unbelievable imagination it was my big sure personal street bros' wife(she is an air hostess, light skinned and good looking)....OMG..I couldn't explain what my eyes just saw, I was freezed out for a moment and then he asked what's wrong about her, straight forward I told him she was my sure man's wife and should please not follow up on her, he smiled and said yes ok fine, I never believed or trusted him as know this guy very well when it comes to oranges...but to my greatest surprise after we left they started having conversation and on sunday when I saw my nigga again I didnt ask about her cos I had a plan, so I pretended I had forgot the scene, afterwards I picked up his phone while he was in the rest room and read there chat, o'boy this matter don go far oooo, to the extent they have started talking raw and even fixing time to meet up and get the honey drilled....hmm, as a matter of fact it gonna be this weekend and my heart keeps beating like im the guilty fellow in this matter, this bros is such a great fellow, he has been very nice since day1 I knew him even before he got married and ive known him now for over 15years and now I know some bad is about to happen to him and I cant even do something to it, it burning and hunting me like im trying to commit a crime I dont know about, I dont even know if telling him is a solution.
Please fellow nairalanders im in a dilemma right now, I have jobs to work on this week, I need max concentration but this issh is just not making me think so right thats why I need your contribution, advice and way forward so I could decide what next to do before the weekend...thanks and Godbless.

Cc lalasticlala

Well, it wasn't Ideal of you Bashing on your guy's Privacy, but wetin don happen don happen.. A Cheating wife is the Worst thing that can Happen to a married Man. Sometimes I wonder if Staying loyal is now a new form of Sin.
i'll Advice you talk to your Guy about what he's doing.. make it understand the dangers of sleeping with a Married Woman... since he was the one that started it, let him put an end to it.. as for the Bit€h, jes leave her... Karma will soon catch up with her. I jes Pity her Innocent Husband.

You saw nothing... it ain't your business, because if she could be that obvious collecting digits in the que then she'll soon get caught out. Its the chick and your player friend that you need to stress. Call her and tell her the position she has put you in. Tell your boy the situation and tell him about the husband, in fact let the men meet set it up quick... Then tell player boy that's her husband in there. Maybe if he sees the guy it will seem more real... Later it won't look bad on you hopefully...

She didnt see me from the stairs, she just waved him and left.....I was the one that actually saw her which is another thing.....u know women nah she go deny am if I approach her and I basically dont like her even as much as im close to her hubby.

Nubian113:
You saw nothing... it ain't your business, because if she could be that obvious collecting digits in the que then she'll soon get caught out. Its the chick and your player friend that you need to stress. Call her and tell her the position she has put you in. Tell your boy the situation and tell him about the husband, in fact let the men meet set it up quick... Then tell player boy that's her husband in there. Maybe if he sees the guy it will seem more real... Later it won't look bad on you hopefully...

I agree it wasnt ideal, but u have to understand I know this guy from childhood and he would deny it if I asked if he didnt follow up on her that's why I played my own little smartness to uncover this all...

Davijunson:
Well, it wasn't Ideal of you Bashing on your guy's Privacy, but wetin don happen don happen.. A Cheating wife is the Worse thing that can Happen to a married Man. Sometimes I wonder if Staying loyal is now a new form of Sin.

Hmmmmmm....the matter hot

Well I don't want u to spoil ur bros marriage because u are uncomfortable with his cheating wife...it might bomb around on u, u hav to thread carefully and wisely

First of all to be in a saver side u have u hav to copy does chats from. Your friends fone to ur fone (for evidence) cause if u tell ur bro jst like dat she might deny and u hav no prove...and things might turn akward for u. So I don't advise u to involve ur bro.

First get the chat as evidence and other conversation u might need, sit ur friend and talk to him man to man dat ur bros wife is a no go area dat u won't like him doing it with her and it might alter ur childhood friendship besides u might be forced to tell her husband showing him the evidence wat is going on...dis might not go well with u guys because u dugged into his privacy take a chill pill and be ready for possible outcomes but don't act out of anger like I said earlier be careful

Den call the wife in question and threaten to. Expose her if she dare sleeps with ur friend. Showing her the evidence. Tell her u will spare her only if she takes her promiscuity to other men but ur friend.

After dis dude please nah God I take beg u drop the case. Am sure their brains will hav entered default by now.

I hope I hav helped

Is she hot? If she is, then meet with her, tell her what you know, negotiate with her and have your own share of the cookie... Then, hook a fresh lady up for the Husband, Everybody wins... Lol..

On a more serious note,
You need to be careful, the only person you need to face is your friend, tell him to drop the game and explain to him the position he has put you in..
The woman will still get the phuck elsewhere though, but at least you won't be involved..

Yeah you have really helped with good points, but I just keep wondering how do I get access to his mobile again...that time we saw last was 3months ago, he could be on shoot for who knows,, im always busy as well during the week so how do I get the convo?....a very big question my sis

zaragal:
Hmmmmmm....the matter hot

Well I don't want u to spoil ur bros marriage because u are uncomfortable with his cheating wife...it might bomb around on u, u hav to thread carefully and wisely

First of all to be in a saver side u have u hav to copy does chats from. Your friends fone to ur fone (for evidence) cause if u tell ur bro jst like dat she might deny and u hav no prove...and things might turn akward for u. So I don't advise u to involve ur bro.

First get the chat as evidence and other conversation u might need, sit ur friend and talk to him man to man dat ur bros wife is a no go area dat u won't like him doing it with her and it might alter ur childhood friendship besides u might be forced to tell her husband showing him the evidence wat is going on...dis might not go well with u guys because u dugged into his privacy take a chill pill and be ready for possible outcomes but don't act out of anger like I said earlier be careful

Den call the wife in question and threaten to. Expose her if she dare sleeps with ur friend. Showing her the evidence. Tell her u will spare her only if she takes her promiscuity to other men but ur friend.

After dis dude please nah God I take beg u drop the case. Am sure their brains will hav entered default by now.

I hope I hav helped

Is she hot? If she is, then meet with her, tell her what you know, negotiate with her and have your own share of the cookie... Then, hook a fresh lady up for the Husband, Everybody wins... Lol..

On a more serious note,
You need to be careful, the only person you need to face is your friend, tell him to drop the game and explain to him the position he has put you in..
The woman will still get the phuck elsewhere though, but at least you won't be involved..

emancipation1:
Yeah you have really helped with good points, but I just keep wondering how do I get access to his mobile again...that time we saw last was 3months ago, he could be on shoot for who knows,, im always busy as well during the week so how do I get the convo?....a very big question my sis

Fyn keep it cool....dont bring up the topic to him until u follow him up, try spare some time dis week maybe Friday and pay him a visit jst get his fone and the chats...but don't make ur move to expose dem with a prove ooo,....if u do..and dey deny u will look like a fool and it might not end well btw ur bro and u

PureWays:
Is she hot? If she is, then meet with her, tell her what you know, negotiate with her and have your own share of the cookie... Then, hook a fresh lady up for the Husband, Everybody wins... Lol..

On a more serious note,
You need to be careful, the only person you need to face is your friend, tell him to drop the game and explain to him the position he has put you in..
The woman will still get the phuck elsewhere though, but at least you won't be involved..

Honestly but the guy is bent on staffing dat lady

Sincerely she's hot and I always never trusted her ways and also given her job...about talking to my friend I swear it not so easy, I cant see him within this week as im not chanced for that in anyways, and even a phone convo would not convinve him, this dude has always been crazy, but let think about this he never met her through me, they met neutrally, so it gonna be so tight convinving him on line, one on one would do it but no time and na weekend them wan hook up...so tight bro

PureWays:
Is she hot? If she is, then meet with her, tell her what you know, negotiate with her and have your own share of the cookie... Then, hook a fresh lady up for the Husband, Everybody wins... Lol..

On a more serious note,
You need to be careful, the only person you need to face is your friend, tell him to drop the game and explain to him the position he has put you in..
The woman will still get the phuck elsewhere though, but at least you won't be involved..

Chei...ladies...smh...I cnt imagine cheating in a relatnship not to talk of marriage...the very recent why celibacy rocks...She don too knw man so Tey she dey find better size dan her husband..

Btw y do women cheat

Honestly he wants to get her down..I could see it all over his face from the mall even whn I didnt kmow it was her..

zaragal:


Honestly but the guy is bent on staffing dat lady

emancipation1:
Sincerely she's hot and I always never trusted her ways and also given her job...about talking to my friend I swear it not so easy, I cant see him within this week as im not chanced for that in anyways, and even a phone convo would not convinve him, this dude has always been crazy, but let think about this he never met her through me, they met neutrally, so it gonna be so tight convinving him on line, one on one would do it but no time and na weekend them wan hook up...so tight bro

If you want to do the right thing, you have to Man up bro.. I understand that it won't be easy as I will feel same way too, but you have to tell him to drop the game..
Or maybe you should use reverse psychology on him, make him feel very bad about it..
Make it seem as if he's done something very bad and still want to continue, that may work you know.

I wonder why women do this...ahhh.....this bros is a big boy works in BAT a regional manager...even the bitch works as an air hostess for several years she ok herself as well...loads of cars to ride bros is even the bros is tall, handsome and elegant...women issh is a myth

zaragal:
Chei...ladies...smh...I cnt imagine cheating in a relatnship not to talk of marriage...the very recent why celibacy rocks...She don too knw man so Tey she dey find better size dan her husband..

Btw y do women cheat

emancipation1:
Honestly he wants to get her down..I could see it all over his face from the mall even whn I didnt kmow it was her..

I knw...I knw he wants to straff dat lady come sun, shebi nah man nah una work

Honestly I don't knw wat else to do...Call him and record the conversation try convincing him not to straff the gurl inshort tell him u hav his chats and u will show ur bro is he tries u apply threats wen u notice there is non compliance from ur pleads and reasonings. Record the conversation and ask him to back off..reason y I said u. Should record the convo is a means of getting any possible evidence should incase u hav to tell ur bro which I don't advice

Call the lady and do same and also record the convo Dat's another evidence. I think dey should back off by now but if not leave dem u tried ur best..act like u neva knew but if u hav to tell. Ur bro does records will come in handy..try not to get thing all messy

one thing dat work for me in dis my small life is dat I mind my business a lot, I don't send pple and pple don't send me. So I respect myself and mind my business a lot and it has really placed value to my life so I doubt mind u adopt same principle bro

zaragal:


Honestly but the guy is bent on staffing dat lady

The woman can't be stopped, I think she's gon turn the table on the Op (If you know what I mean), so it's better to face the Op's friend instead of the woman..
Such women are not gonna stop, atleast not now, so I believe it's her husband choice, it's his problem but if the op is to do the right thing, he should find a way to make his friend drop the game, so as not to be involved in the Man's home wreck..

Viewing dis post toysemuch......oya contribute

I respect this you just wrote......that was the plan I wish to fall back on....to dent him mentally and wreck his psyche on the lady....but I still have a fragment of doubt if it works cos at times this nigga runs out of conscience.....I swear he does, I know him for almost all his life sometyms I doubt he has conscience......thats why I dont mind different appraoch and way forward from several people even with such experience.,....thanks

PureWays:
If you want to do the right thing, you have to Man up bro.. I understand that it won't be easy as I will feel same way too, but you have to tell him to drop the game..
Or maybe you should use reverse psychology on him, make him feel very bad about it..
Make it seem as if he's done something very bad and still want to continue, that may work you know.

PureWays:
The woman can't be stopped, I think she's gon turn the table on the Op (If you know what I mean), so it's better to face the Op's friend instead of the woman..
Such women are not gonna stop, atleast not now, so I believe it's her husband choice, it's his problem but if the op is to do the right thing, he should find a way to make his friend drop the game, so as not to be involved in the Man's home wreck..

Exactly but if the guy doesn't dey they shoult make the lady quit the game. Now it doesn't matter who quits the game but the game eventually ended before it began simple!

If he threatens the gurl saying he has evidenc e of the chat, the lady will be frightened and if wise and wants to save her marriage will quit the game. Here the friend is head bent whether u kill ram he will do it behind the op's back and gbam! Dat's it! End of story

tosyne2much:
Personally, if telling the truth will crush someone else's marriage, it's better you withhold the truth to yourself. You don't destroy someone else's marriage with your so called TRUTH. However, truth is sometimes better left unsaid


Bros, I think the highest you can do, is to talk to your friend and give reasons for him to back off. You might even have to lie just to get him convinced. You could tell him you were the best man during her weeding



If this fails you, just keep mute cos then you have done your part


Lastly, someone up there advised you to get pictural evidence that you will present to her husband. Haba !!! I just hope you won't lose your life on this

Gbam! No more no less

I must say tour contribution has been superb...I really feel keeping my mouth shut would be the best .....but if I dont do anything it means Im not worthy to call that man big bros whenever we see again cos he gave me my 1st job when I had no experience and just graduated....this life can be so twisted

zaragal:


I knw...I knw he wants to straff dat lady come sun, shebi nah man nah una work

Honestly I don't knw wat else to do...Call him and record the conversation try convincing him not to straff the gurl inshort tell him u hav his chats and u will show ur bro is he tries u apply threats wen u notice there is non compliance from ur pleads and reasonings. Record the conversation and ask him to back off..reason y I said u. Should record the convo is a means of getting any possible evidence should incase u hav to tell ur bro which I don't advice

Call the lady and do same and also record the convo Dat's another evidence. I think dey should back off by now but if not leave dem u tried ur best..act like u neva knew but if u hav to tell. Ur bro does records will come in handy..try not to get thing all messy

one thing dat work for me in dis my small life is dat I mind my business a lot, I don't send pple and pple don't send me. So I respect myself and mind my business a lot and it has really placed value to my life so I doubt mind u adopt same principle bro

emancipation1:
I must say tour contribution has been superb...I really feel keeping my mouth shut would be the best .....but if I dont do anything it means Im not worthy to call that man big bros whenever we see again cos he gave me my 1st job when I had no experience and just graduated....this life can be so twisted

Try ur best and leave the rest Dat's the philosophy

emancipation1:
I respect this you just wrote......that was the plan I wish to fall back on....to dent him mentally and wreck his psyche on the lady....but I still have a fragment of doubt if it works cos at times this nigga runs out of conscience.....I swear he does, I know him for almost all his life sometyms I doubt he has conscience......thats why I dont mind different appraoch and way forward from several people even with such experience.,....thanks

Oow.. That's bad.. I have an idea.. If you think he won't buy the Reverse psychology thing, then you can use this in him:
Act cool with what he wants to do, you can make him discuss it with you and roll with the flow, you know..
All you need to do is to let the woman know that you guys are friend then visit the Husband at home couple times when the woman is around ( That's to send mesage).. That should definitely work, and if your friend tries to bring the matter up with you, just answer his questions sarcastically.. He will get the message too.. Lol..

zaragal:
Viewing dis post toysemuch......oya contribute

I have done the needful

Bro I guess u have had some friends that were pain to you but became so close that you can hardly wave them off....this guy is a fine example.....crazy his lies are specially manufactured and I wonder where he buried his conscience when he was actually given one.....you have said well, but sincerely i need the best strategy that wont involve this guy that much cos he is my own problem.

tosyne2much:
Personally, if telling the truth will crush someone else's marriage, it's better you withhold the truth to yourself. You don't destroy someone else's marriage with your so called TRUTH. However, truth is sometimes better left unsaid


Bros, I think the highest you can do, is to have a confidential discussion with your friend giving him reasons to back off. You might even have to employ lies just to get him discouraged. You could tlie tto him that you were the best man during her wedding, so you won't be able to overlook such a thing happening between them



If this fails you, just keep mute cos then you have done your part


Lastly, someone up there advised you to get pictural evidence that you will present to her husband. Haba !!! I just hope you won't lose your life on this

zaragal:


Exactly but if the guy doesn't dey they shoult make the lady quit the game. Now it doesn't matter who quits the game but the game eventually ended before it began simple!

If he threatens the gurl saying he has evidenc e of the chat, the lady will be frightened and if wise and wants to save her marriage will quit the game. Here the friend is head bent whether u kill ram he will do it behind the op's back and gbam! Dat's it! End of story

Chat can be forged, she has a shot on that.. And besides, i don't think the hope can pull the threat game off, no pun intended @ Op, I may not either..

zaragal:
Chei...ladies...smh...I cnt imagine cheating in a relatnship not to talk of marriage...the very recent why celibacy rocks...She don too knw man so Tey she dey find better size dan her husband..

Btw y do women cheat

It's in their DNA.


Only a proportion of them are able to overcome it

I thought about letting her know I am friends with the fish she's just hunting....but then I realized given the fact that i dont role with her even when I visit him I hardly greet her, I guess woth this join she go dent my image and say loads of untrue stuffs which the hubby might not have time to confirm and accept her perspective.......from all vies I think I would just do my best and leave the rest as said by zaragal

PureWays:
Oow.. That's bad.. I have an idea.. If you think he won't buy the Reverse psychology thing, then you can use this in him:
Act cool with what he wants to do, you can make him discuss it with you and roll with the flow, you know..
All you need to do is to let the woman know that you guys are friend then visit the Husband at home couple times when the woman is around ( That's to send mesage).. That should definitely work, and if your friend tries to bring the matter up with you, just answer his questions sarcastically.. He will get the message too.. Lol..

tosyne2much:
It's in their DNA.


Only a proportion of them are able to overcome it

Wouldn't it be nice if u use the word "some" ...Cos it's not in mine...I knw it's in urs no. Doubt