marriage is different from wedding,many young couples hardly observe the difference,you can save your marriage by identifying the major difference,know what it takes to plan the wedding and how you avoid some hitch even though you dont have it 100% as planned. But after the wedding you are happy. Ok now plan your marriage too same way you planned and review till the wedding day. Communication is very vital after wedding. ask the Human Resourcse Personnel what is called performance appraisal,same way review your marriage and communicate at interval,find time to ask ,dont insinuates ,its brings suspicion and creates conflicts in marriage. Avoid reporting your partner to anyone,even your closest friend. Always let go sometimes what you think is minimal(Love endures) . Avoid nagging. Censor your friends and weigh their influence on your matrimonial life.Prayer should be your lubricating song everyday. I welcome more tips from others hence we can help one another.

Avoid reporting your partner to anyone,even your closest friend.

I'm kind of wary about this particular point. it would have made more sense to me if you'd actually clarify the certain kinds of behavior that shouldn't be reported to a friend. i say this cause of many cases of domestic violence. and many of this victims (mostly women) often avoid telling their loved ones or close friends what goes on behind close doors in their marriage and more often than none they end up paying the price with their lives because of something that could have been easily prevented if a loved one or close friend knew about it.

@ Sissy


You make good sense there,but sometimes when you report your partner deeds,the advise given by the third party is suicidal. Sometimes you might not even feel it as bad as that person is proving it to you. So it depends on the degree of what you are reporting,and the intellects of the person reporting to weigh advise given. Perception differs from reality. You make good sense but it all depends on my view as stated above

yes, i do agree that not everything little argument or mess that goes on in a marriage requires the involvement of a third party. some marital misunderstandings are better solved between the couples, unless it is something beyond their control. however, any sign of domestic violence requires the urgent intercession of a third party regardless.

Sissy has a point there. I don't advise couples to discuss their private matters with outsiders. But there are cases were it is highly recommended. Minor issues can easily be solved without involving a third party, but as soon as u see that the issue is getting out of hand, then one should involve people that can mediate between you two.

@ sissy and Tgirl4real I agree with both of you. I will also welcome other positive ways and manner to save and guide marriage or better still to guard . I mean something different from the one highlighted above in the first post. You are all welcome.

for me i think for a marriage to be successful and fruitful it needs

Love, (very essential) Support (from both couples and outsiders as well very important), Tolerance (you need to know how to tolerant the other person and their misbehaves), Communication (supper important), Realistic expectations (marriage is not a bed of roses, so knowing what is involved in very important. Caring (very necessary), Nurturing(important), Sense of humor ( even if you don't have it naturally try at least, cause it enlightens the mood), Commitment (very essential), Respect (highly important, every marriage needs it), Knowing how to handle conflict ( important), Problem solve together ( know to resolve some problems within yourselves), Interdependence (important), Enjoying one another (required), Having fun together ( essential because it helps in bringing the couple more closer to each other).