As tears rolled down my eyes I began to ask myself.. How did I survive? How will I survive? Is it just me or there's someone else out there that goes through this?
Its been 6 months my parents have not sent any money to me, I wasn't the type that brings food stuff from the house so I had Nothing..... Nothing at all! Food, toiletries.... Nothing. I felt bad cause they never asked 'How do you survive?' I understand well that the economy is bad but for 6 months?
As a girl child who has no qualification or job experience there's only two things involved... Your body or the favour of God. Men will say how can a fine girl like you be broke. Those who liked you genuinely (thats if we still have them around) will give you money but one day he will come for sex aggressively like its their birth right.
Family members were not nice at all. You will hear someone say 'I thought your father is building a house now, why cant he send you money?' That alone was enough to spoil your week.
My dad didn't make matters Okay.. Always made it look like his not suppose to send money. My mum always said 'Nne if you sucessed in school without doing any bad thing then you are truly strong' ...... I don't know what the future holds, I don't know if I will ever become who I want to become...
Am scared.

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My name is Favour. I am the first born and the only girl. Its not easy I guess you figured that out already from my first writing.
31-05-2015.
I left school earlier than usual, I have been sick and had no money to go for a test or even get drugs. As I walked home, a guy greeted from behind but I didn't answer I wasn't ready to exchange greetings but that didn't stop him, he said 'Madam you dropped your purse! I looked back and collected it with a sharp' Thank you '.
He said' My name is Dozie and you are? Seeing he wasn't going to leave soon I stopped to talk. He collected my number and promised to call me. As I got home not less than 30 minutes my phone rang, it was Dozie and he wanted to take me out for lunch, this I couldn't turn down knowing I didn't have any money to eat... So I made him beg a little and finally agreed.
It was worth it we talked a lot, I told him I wasn't feeling too well and he acted all nice, after a long day he dropped me and gaved me 3k saying I should get better I couldn't say anything I didn't expect it so I just said a quick Thank you and left. As I got home I thanked God. Knowing fully well how guys are.
Days turned weeks, weeks turned months and Dozie became a very close friend. I would go to his place after school and we would eat and watch movies together. Never for once did he act like he wanted more than friendship.
One fateful day Dozie called me at around past 9 'Babiee, can we see now?' He sounded really down so I agreed, before I knew it he was already outside waiting for me. With my short and a big shirt I had on. I hurried out. There he was looking so pale, As he saw me his eyes lightened like I was his drug... I wasn't ready to talk in the car so I kept quiet until we got home. I went straight to the room, As he walked in he was smiling and inside my mind I said 'you don enter am!' He came close and held me so tight and honestly I liked the touch, pulling out I asked him 'what's wrong?' he said 'Nothing, I just didn't want to sleep alone this night' I didn't want to make up things so I just waited for what ever was coming next.
We had ice cream and I fell sleep not until I felt his hands trying to undo my zip. I quickly stood up and shouted 'what's the meaning of this?' he didn't act like he was sorry, in fact he acted like he had every right to. He said 'Don't act like you don't want this come here! I struggled but he won. As he hands ran through my body he kept on saying' why are you so ungrateful? Have I not tried 'I was weak and the only thing that went through my mind was...' only if I was comfortable, only if I had money that day he offered to take me out, only if my parents understood.

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