Sex Before Marriage Palava - Religion - Nairaland
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What Does The Bible Say About Sex Before Marriage? / "Apostle Suleman Uses His Tongue On Me During Sex Before Preaching" - Otobo / Bromleigh McCleneghan: Sex Before Marriage Is Good (2) (3) (4)
| Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 5:13pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
Good day all, I just need sound logical opinions and assertions on this issue. I am in my mid-20s. When I was a teenager, I attended lots of religious classes and programs. I got fixated with doctrines and dogmas of the Church. But amongst all, the one that touched me most, is the part that that dissuade premarital sex and buttressed on how obnoxious it is to GOD. "Mind you, I so much believe in God". Sermons of how people that have fornicates or is fornicating will burn in hell have struck me to a point that I dread Sex. Well, the abstinence is not really a problem, but how long should an average man wait especially in this kind of economic and secularism one find himself in? If premarital sex needs to be frowned at, then why the urge and libido. As a teenager, I used to think it was the work of the devil whenever the conji factor appears in me, lol. Albeit, how can one suppress or sublime this urge and for how long? Moreover, If what was postulated by Apostle Paul is real in the book of 1st corinthians , then Is it that every entity that have indulged in sex before marriage is going to hell or be ruined? So many people with an idealistic subjective views will say "why not you go and marry?" Then I say, should one marry because of sex? To all the team "no sex before marriage", I would like to know how come you suppressed your libido while others can't. Disclaimer: I am not encouraging the act of premarital sex, but I just need proper Orientation on it. Thanks all. cc: Cutehector4u, Chison89,ITbomb,Tallesty1, naijaboy, tosyne2much, Godmother, Toks2008, johnydon22, safarigirl, italo, lalasticlala, menesheh, raayah, KingEbukasBlog, unibenstudent, 5minsmadness, misspicy, Swtchicgurl. Ishilove, mynd44, plaetton, ronald4lif, winner01 |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Debeloved87(m): 5:23pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
Proper orientation? Go get a wife.. Or abstain till you get one However check here for my debut gospel hit https://www.nairaland.com/2824734/nairalander-droped-gospel-debut-hit#41364037 Pleeeeeeeeeeease download *smiles* |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by johnydon22(m): 5:26pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
Isn't it remarkable how many have been convinced that there is a powerful humanoid who created the universe and everything in it and then comes to planet earth only to get concerned over who haves sex or not.. It is a huge form of childishness and misplaced priority... Vying to burn people over what they do with themselves that is of no concern to any other. Such nonsensical reason given by men in order to add weight to their own idea of sexuality and so heaps a baseless restrictions on such actions is ridiculous.. Personally to me i don't see how two consenting adults choosing to have fun with themselves without hurting anybody is doing something abominable.. Religions may teach human sexuality as sinful that doesn't mean its bad or will it ever... it is part of us and it is a beautiful part of us... I see nothing wrong in consenting adults agreeing to have sex... 6 Likes 5 Shares |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 6:06pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
Debeloved87:How did you abstained? |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 6:24pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
johnydon22 that was mind blowing. Thanks for the assertions. Am still thinking |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by johnydon22(m): 6:30pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
virginboy1: The moral outlook of people differ from person to person and also is subjective from people to people, culture to culture or organizations. Someone with a religious affiliation may not or cannot separate morality with God or religion and as such the religious lay outs or doctrines becomes the moral compass of such a person. I on my own part as you know so well is independent of any of such doctrines, coercions or dogmas and i do not recognize any God or deities as a subject of human moral outlook. My actions are for humans and the human society and in another scale for every other living organism sharing this planet and not to any God or deity.. So what i consider good or bad are the effect of my actions on other people or the society i live in... 2 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by CoolUsername: 7:31pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
The Bible is like 'no sex outside marriage'. Most people hit puberty between 13 and 16. Sex shortens women's periods and alleviates pain. Studies show that it reduces blood pressure. Studies show that it reduces the chances of prostate cancer in men. Why are you denying us all these benefits? |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Tallesty1(m): 7:34pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God. Can you honestly glorify God by gonking a woman who isn't your wife? Ofcourse not. So your conscience has judged you already. Religion aside, our culture frowns at pre-marital sex and I am sure there's a reason. My parents had no religion when I was small yet they abhor fornication. Our generation might give you convincing ideas why it is nice for adults who are not married to have sex but as a Christian, you ought to be different from the world. Now, religion and our culture aside. People who abstained from sex before marriage often tend to be inexperienced when it comes to sex and relationships. Their marriage thrives based on blissful ignorance. These partners spend less time fantasizing about previous sexual partners and they aren't as aware that there may be many more partners outside of their relationship who are a better match for their emotional or sexual needs. For them, sex with their partner, really is the best sex they've ever had. There's no ex to pour them hot water, acid or to cut their kids container with a razor blade. Sex before marriage is one of the reasons our marriages crash, people confuse lust and the emotions associated with sex to love and think they have find the perfect one. When sex life gets boring and other things that came with it fades, then will become angry birds and break up. Abstinence honestly leads to more satisfying marriages, It reduces the risk of disappointment and heart break, Risk of Pregnancy, Risk of STD etc. Bro, I have been there and I can categorically tell you that it is not as nice as people portray it. and you're likely to hate yourself after your first time. There's a reason why abstinence is difficult, nothing good comes easy so wait. How to cope. Choose the right friends, ask God to help you, stay away from things that will arouse you and exercise often. Just keep yourself busy, the only time I feel like having sex is when I am bored. So keep yourself busy. You are in your mid twenties, just few more years and all these will end and the woman you will marry shall respect you 4 it. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Nobody: 8:19pm On Dec 26, 2015 |
Hello to all, In my perception, Sex is a good thing as it has been created by God. There is nothing wrong with sex, provided one does not become addict/slave to it (which is very often the case in our sex-oriented society). The principle "No sex out of Marriage" is in my sensing in accord with the laws of GOD, on the condition that Mariage is given its true definition. Marriage is not a religious ceremony, nor a document signed by an earthly authority. Marriage is simply the union of 2 people with genuine love for each other (and for GOD) and compatibility. Religious ceremonies and papers are not mariages nor do they attest the genuineness of any marriage, in the eyes of GOD. Therefore Sex is right between two people who love each other genuinely and love GOD, and are hence not only looking forward to satisfy their sexual urge which would be self interest. And of course, it requires no certificate of mariage nor anything else but true love. Sex out of such genuine love, solidifies the bond between both the man and the woman. Yes you guessed right, many a Union castigated and vilified today by religious men, are actually pure before GOD, whereas many a Marriage performed in Churches and temples are wrong in the sight of GOD, for lacking in pure love. Above all, it is not enough that 2 people be consenting for their sexual acts to be pure before GOD. 2 consenting adults can have sex without loving each other, or mistaking their lust for real love. Of course they are free to do so, since GOD has given each one of us free will. But they must of necessity bear the responsibilities/consequences attached to their act. It is not because there are sometimes no immediate consequences, that they are no consequences at all. Greetings to all. 2 Likes |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by ITbomb(m): 7:58am On Dec 27, 2015 |
The only advice I would give you is what Nigerian Breweries gave me, "Drink Responsibly". Whether beer is good or bad but if you abuse it, it abuses you. I am one of the few who were brought up by knowledge seeking, bible researching peeps (not just the religious type) and I was made to understand that sex before marriage is a fallacy, the truth is that SEX IS MARRIAGE, the other occasion where the family meet is just to honor it. If someone says that church wedding is marriage then our fathers never married but we know that the Word of God stands for ever. For instance, when Jesus met the woman of Samaritan by the well side, he didn't say that she slept with 5 men, he said she is married to 5 men In Genesis 24:67, it was only when Isaac brought her into his tent and "TOOK HER" that she became his wife, Catholic call it consummation of marriage but believe me, that is the real marriage. On judgement day, you will not be asked how many times you have done fornication but the question would be "how many times you have married and shared your vessel with another and on what intent" The relation to your case is this, if you want to be with anyone, let it be for a genuine intent of love and procreation, also let it, as much as possible, be honored by both parents. THAT IS "BEING RESPONSIBLE" that is the eternal essence of sex, anything else just for lust or to fulfill your selfish desires is irresponsible and technically "sin" That is my personal position on the issue of sex, I don't preach it to anyone or try to convince anyone, it is my personal conviction and grace 2 Likes |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Nobody: 8:51am On Dec 27, 2015 |
In the days gone by. A man of 20 is married and has 3 kids. No sex before marriage. Today, a man of 20...................... Do the math  |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Debeloved87(m): 10:10am On Dec 27, 2015 |
virginboy1:by your mindset... What is not right is wrong. Simple |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 10:41am On Dec 27, 2015 |
Debeloved87:Hmmmm what a point, a subjective one. So therefore it's all about one's mindset  No wonder johnydon22 said "many people are worshipping their fears". |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 11:00am On Dec 27, 2015 |
You are in your mid twenties, just few more years and all these will end and the woman you will marry shall respect you 4 it. @ Tallesty1, the last point really got into my heart. But I think one can't compare the lifestyle of our grandparents to this our contemporary clime, because I think there is a huge difference between the Orientation Factor. Then premarital sex was highly discouraged and I believe the drive isn't that high as compared to this modern times. Now, sex is just so cheap, social media encourages lewd images, seductive dress are ubiquitous. If at 20 one has not tasted it peer groups mock and sight them as weakling etc. You made mention of seeking for a partner that abstained, but to be realistic,we all know that they are so scare and rare to come across. May God see us through. |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Tallesty1(m): 11:15am On Dec 27, 2015 |
virginboy1:Things change, people change but what is wrong can never become right, even if the whole world is doing it. virginboy1: It was, and they had prostitutes then, just like we do today but the reason it seems like the drive is higher now is because there's indecency in almost everything you look at. From the books you read, movies you watch to the people you see on the streets. And many modern day parents do not know their calling. virginboy1:My point exactly. Satan is fighting Christians with any tool it can lay hands on. If pre-marital sex was wrong 100 years ago then believe you me it still is..... virginboy1:Your partner mustn't be a v. Jesus ensure you have a healthy relationship with Christ and everything will automatically fall in place. 2 Likes |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 12:29pm On Dec 27, 2015 |
Tallesty1:The last point though, one must agree that is sad, knowing fully well that after maintaining and striving so hard with prayers , hardwork, tolerance et al to practice abstinence at the long run the other half have tasted it several times. God help us. |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by virginboy1(m): 12:32pm On Dec 27, 2015 |
ITbomb:Wow!!! nice write-up. From this I can decipher that it is about being responsible or irresponsible. |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by frank317: 2:50pm On Dec 27, 2015 |
virginboy1: To me...premarital sex is not really about being responsible or not. Responsibility only comes into sex when the individual is mature enough. Sex, to me, is only abused when, and adult sleeps with someone below 18 or 16. Such child is not responsible for her actions. Sex is abused when a man forces a woman to have sex weather she is young or old (ra.pe). If two people a matured and can take responsibility of the fallout of sex I.e, pregnancy or disease, why stop them from having sex? If I have a girl friend and we have the urge, and I know that if she gets pregnant, I will handle it, I will marry her or take care of the child... And the girl is okay with it, why will anyone or God, stop me? My question is, why does sex outside marriage vex God? What effect does it have on him? Again... Must everyone marry? Some people dont really like the idea of marriage because they know they are not capable of successfully go through the institution, should they there fore never have sex? |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Nobody: 11:42pm On Dec 27, 2015 |
frank317: Marriage [in the sight of God] is not in my sensing a religious ceremony, nor a certificate delivered by the mayor. Marriage is simply the union of 2 people who love themselves genuinely and love GOD. Whether the marriage has been "blessed" by a priest or imam is irrelevant. Of course there's nothing wrong in fulfilling state and religious requirements for Marriage, but that in itself does not constitute marriage. Hence, if 2 people love each other genuinely and live in the sense of the law of GOD, they are free to have sex. Indeed, sex is a good thing as it was created by GOD. However, the practice of having sex only to quench the sexual urge is in my perception wrong. This is no longer love, but self interest. It is utilizing the body of another fellow Human being to satisfy your Lust. The fact that the person consents does not change the fact that it is wrong. All over the world they are people who are being exploited with their full consent. It is (High) time our generation learns to dominate et control the pulses of our body. Our Body is a tool, not a Master. What happen when the car drives the driver? Therefore sexual urge is not enough reason to indulge in any sexual activity. True love is. And such love makes the relationship blessed by God, and unbreakable. I wish you all, blessings. 2 Likes |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by frank317: 4:50am On Dec 28, 2015 |
LoJ: Come out of fantasy land... Genuine love is not achievable. Everybody is managing each other. We are not perfect beings, how can imperfect being give genuine love? |
| Re: Sex Before Marriage Palava by Nobody: 7:41am On Dec 28, 2015 |
Hello to all, @ Frank317, Genuine love does exist. Of course it does not mean there shall never be challenges or difficulties. But where there's genuine love, those problems will serve to reinforce the link between the two partners. We learn from our mistakes. It helps to know our partner better and adjust so as to please him/her more. Genuine love exists when both partners are committed to make the other one happy and fulfilled. Love is the reason for marriage. Marriage and having children are a school of GOD. The intend is to teach us no longer to be self centered, be to take the interest of the other (Spouse/child) at heart before one's own interest. Hence one learn the fundamentals of true Love. Love is the key to enter in the Kingdom of GOD, so Marriage is a great school for Spirituality. Greetings. |
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