Thinking about it now,I don't even know where to start,i will just start somewhere though.My dad is rich but complains alot. I am a fresh graduate,before my dad was very caring although we've always been together but him and i are not close because we don't agree on same things, he complains about even single thing I do and the painful thing above all is that he doesn't allow my Mom have rest of mind, to me,I see my mom as the strongest woman I have ever seen,I can't even cope with quarter of what she endures at home, my dad takes himself as God,he believe i should always dance to his tunes, before I graduated, there is no day i come home either during the holiday or just during the week have I been happy while returning because he would always complain about things. I love my Mom so much but that doesn't mean I support blindly her ,i tell her whenever she's at fault whenever she and dad has issues, my dad monitors her phone about to stop her from using "whatspp", whereas he uses it on his phone, my mom might be doing somethings on her phone and dad will just come around and forcefully collect the phone from her,he complains about my spending habit and I know am guilty of that and I told him am going to change, he threatened me he isn't going to give me pocket-money for a year and I know it isn't majorly about my spending habit but also because I told him he is right about the way he has been behaving to mom and my siblings, my spending habit isn't entirely my fault but as a result of the things I used money for in school,I only collect pocket money and school fees from him and I don't add any extra fees to it,it's from my pocket money that I do everything and pay anything I pay in school.He has called me a "shame" twice now and am waiting for the third time he's going to say that am I will tell him never to call me that again,When I got my admission he wasn't happy and even when I came home after graduation,it wasn't even like I was an human being not to even talk about just being a person that has just graduated, my mom is fed up with him,he uses foul/bad words alot and she talks and treats her like she is an house help. A friend called me at midnight some days ago and we talked for long, and he kept coming to my room and flashing touch at me, and when it was daybreak, he kept shouting like i just impregnated a lady, and called me a shame just because of the call and he threatned not to give me picket money for a year. The truth is that I don't even have any likeness for him, although I will protect him from harm though, but he has seriously hurt me so much, and I can't even wait to start living on my own and neglect him to be on his own.Hmm i just felt like writing this to know what y'all fell about this,it would have been longer than this but I just had to cut it short. SHOUT OUT TO ALL MOTHERS!

One advice brother, leave ur dad's house!

Lol, if you were in my shoes you would have shot him by now.


You're already a graduate so you should make plans to get a job and leave the house. Pray for him and with time he'll regret his actions.

elantraceey:
Lol, if you were in my shoes you would have shot him by now.


You're already a graduate so you should make plans to get a job and leave the house. Pray for him and with time he'll regret his actions.

I am yet to go for NYSC!

woodalchidude:

I am yet to go for NYSC!

Doesn't change anything. you can get your hands on something before you do, get a job or acquire a new skill.

First of all, why do you make your parents' marriage your business? Stay out of it. It is for them to sort out their issues. The more people get involved, the more complicated it becomes. Your mother is an adult so let her deal with her issues, her husband and her marriage on her own.

Secondly, your dad sponsors your education with the pocket money he gives you and you should be grateful. And as long as it his money you are spending, it is his right to complain if you are not spending his money wisely and you said that you do not manage your finances appropriately.

Thirdly, I acknowledge that your father has a somewhat difficult personality but I can also see that he has managed to take care of the family financially quite well and that he cares about you else he would not give you money and wouldn't care how you go about your finances so appreciate it.

Instead of complaining about what he does not do right, focus on what he does for you and appreciate it!

Mindfulness:
First of all, why do you make your parents' marriage your business? Stay out of it. It is for them to sort out their issues. The more people get involved, the more complicated it becomes. Your mother is an adult so let her deal with her issues, her husband and her marriage on her own.

Secondly, your dad sponsors your education with the pocket money he gives you and you should be grateful. And as long as it his money you are spending, it is his right to complain if you are not spending his money wisely and you said that you do not manage your finances appropriately.

Thirdly, I acknowledge that your father has a somewhat difficult personality but I can also see that he has managed to take care of the family financially quite well and that he cares about you else he would not give you money and wouldn't care how you go about your finances so appreciate it.

Instead of complaining about what he does not do right, focus on what he does for you and appreciate it!

Well said..

Somehow, I dont know why this thought keeps coming to my head "perhaps U are not ur father's child and he knows...somehow i feel the story is incomplete".

Nwayz, don't focus on regret. Focus on proving him wrong about his notion on you being a disappointment. Focus all the negative energy I see in your write up towards being someone he can be proud of. There is no better way to change the perception ur father has of u than being the exact opposite of what he has labelled u.

Start saving. Use the opportunity availed u in ur service year wisely. I assume u will most likely serve in a different state. Be smart. Remember ur goal is to make it. Don't let ur dad feel like u are trying to rub shoulders with him cos no matter how u want to see it, HE IS and WILL ALWAYS BE UR DAD. Start giving him his due respect.

U need to leave that house real soon so make all "legitimate" effort to do so.

Good luck!

The most difficult role to play is that of a father. If you are too soft things will go wrong. If you are strict you are a dictator and nobody loves you. Had the same issues with my dad and I felt the same way then. He hasn't changed much but being a father today makes me see things from his perspective and actually appreciate him. OP..... Pray for your father and try to become the man he wants you to be cos one day, you'll be standing where he his standing today .

Dis-father him! Oh, you can't: he will still be your father.

Kill him! Oh! You' ll cause grief to your your mum and you'll be a murder and go to hell.

Run away from home! Oh, you may die of needs cause you got not job.

Stay put and learn how to live with him afterall he did not just start that.

Young man, I feel that youthful exurberance may be part of your problem.

Have cared to see things from his perpective? I strong believe that he has matured rrasons why he is 'reacting' this way to you.

What an old sees while seated, a child will not see it even if the child climbs mtn mast.

Never forget, "Nwoke ga-afu ife ibeya furu".

stitcheD:
The most difficult role to play is that of a father. If you are too soft things will go wrong. If you are strict you are a dictator and nobody loves you. Had the same issues with my dad and I felt the same way then. He hasn't changed much but being a father today makes me see things from his perspective and actually appreciate him. OP..... Pray for your father and try to become the man he wants you to be cos one day, you'll be standing where he his standing today .

That is true! Reality!!!

Most young people who are still dependent on their parents and singles will not understand what you wrote. Experience they say is the b....... (you know now).

If I should tell you about my father eh, in fact my brother you will be the one to disown him on my behalf . he's too somehow and anyhow

Ginaz:
If I should tell you about my father eh, in fact my brother you will be the one to disown him on my behalf . he's too somehow and anyhow

lol

I think our father's have the same mentality.
You won't live there forever,

I feel your dad loves you though, he gives you pocket money, advises you on your spending habit. People just have different ways of showing it. Yeah, he's possessive but that's understandable.

You better start showing him love, he deserves more than this from you. Some people hustled their way through school without the help of their "wealthy" fathers. When you hear some stories, you'd appreciate your parents more. Nobody is perfect.

Mindfulness:
First of all, why do you make your parents' marriage your business? Stay out of it. The more people get involved, the more complicated it becomes. Your mother is an adult so let her deal with her issues, her husband and her marriage on her own.

Ma, I counter that,
his parents' marriage is His business, to some extent. he is a part of that home, so He is affected by what happens between the parents - It could tell on him, emotionally and psycologically. Everyone seeks peace in His own home, so he should not stay out of it. Yeah, its the Mom's issue, and she should deal with it, what if she needed someone to help her deal with it.

Woodalchidude, what I'll say to you is to get yourself together and be determined not to return to live with your parents when you finish NYSC, you may face something worse because more would be expected of you by then.

And then, I can tell you, your dad Loves you and wants the Best for you, so keep telling yourself that 'you are not a Shame to anyone'
As per his attitude to Mom, talk to her, 'the strongest woman' like you called her and see how you guys will file things out with dad.

Ginaz:
If I should tell you about my father eh, in fact my brother you will be the one to disown him on my behalf . he's too somehow and anyhow

Funny!

ladyF:
I feel your dad loves you though, he gives you pocket money, advises you on your spending habit. People just have different ways of showing it. Yeah, he's possessive but that's understandable.

You better start showing him love, he deserves more than this from you. Some people hustled their way through school without the help of their "wealthy" fathers. When you hear some stories, you'd appreciate your parents more. Nobody is perfect.

You know what?I want him to just stop complaining, also stop using bad words,to also show Mom love and if they can both laugh together, jokingly play together and also don't forget about their children in the process, that 's fine with me even though I and him do not still agree with each other, I no longer make any comments again whenever he's complaining and also I won't ask him for pocket-money because I know that's where he will be waiting to catch me.

Fraih:

Ma, I counter that,
his parents' marriage is His business, to some extent. he is a part of that home, so He is affected by what happens between the parents - It could tell on him, emotionally and psycologically. Everyone seeks peace in His own home, so he should not stay out of it. Yeah, its the Mom's issue, and she should deal with it, what if she needed someone to help her deal with it.

Woodalchidude, what I'll say to you is to get yourself together and be determined not to return to live with your parents when you finish NYSC, you may face something worse because more would be expected of you by then.

And then, I can tell you, your dad Loves you and wants the Best for you, so keep telling yourself that 'you are not a Shame to anyone'
As per his attitude to Mom, talk to her, 'the strongest woman' like you called her and see how you guys will file things out with dad.

I love the way you wrote that!

Are you the only child?
If the answer is YES, then dig deeper. Talk to your mom and ask her questions.

Acidosis:
Are you the only child?

If the answer is YES, then dig deeper. Talk to your mom and ask her questions.

He possibly cannot be an only child. He mentioned SIBLINGS in the post.

Fraih:

Ma, I counter that,
his parents' marriage is His business, to some extent. he is a part of that home, so He is affected by what happens between the parents - It could tell on him, emotionally and psycologically. Everyone seeks peace in His own home, so he should not stay out of it. Yeah, its the Mom's issue, and she should deal with it, what if she needed someone to help her deal with it.


Woodalchidude, what I'll say to you is to get yourself together and be determined not to return to live with your parents when you finish NYSC, you may face something worse because more would be expected of you by then.

And then, I can tell you, your dad Loves you and wants the Best for you, so keep telling yourself that 'you are not a Shame to anyone'
As per his attitude to Mom, talk to her, 'the strongest woman' like you called her and see how you guys will file things out with dad.

Apparently he is not in the position to help his mother. If he doesn't like the way they relate to one another and wants peace, he can soon move out.
He can't control his father though.

Acidosis:
Are you the only child?

If the answer is YES, then dig deeper. Talk to your mom and ask her questions.

Why did you write that?

Sijo01:


He possibly cannot be an only child. He mentioned SIBLINGS in the post.

Oh, I skipped that part

my dad is late.won't mind having your dad as mine as long as he is alive.