Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,158,991 members, 7,838,507 topics. Date: Friday, 24 May 2024 at 12:25 AM

Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much (30141 Views)

Lady Gets Car As Birthday Gift From Husband (Photos) / Court Dissolves Marriage Of Woman Who Collects N500 From Husband Before Sex / Advice For Relocating To Nigeria (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (Reply) (Go Down)

Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by igbobuigbo: 10:42pm On Mar 07, 2016
A friend is in the situation described below:

Lived in Lagos until 2006
Got married in 2005 in Owerri.
Moved wife from Owerri (she was working there) to Lagos in 2005.
Moved wife from Lagos to Holland (2006-2008). He was studying for MSc; she could not work
Moved wife from Holland to UK (2008 - 2012). Obtained his PhD while wife did some okay paying, although not so great jobs.
Moved wife from UK to Minnesota, USA (he got a job with a sponsored H1 Visa) in 2012; but wife could not work with her H4 visa
Became a Green Card holder with wife in 2014. Wife started working and settling down in Minnesota.
Then he goes for a bigger job in Pennsylvania; moves wife along to Pittsburgh in 2015. Wife took several months to get a job because she is not as educationally advanced as hubby.
Now he wants to move to Washington, DC, for even a much bigger job. Wife says ''no way. This is becoming crazy. I have a life too''. I'd rather divorce than move this time''.

What do you think he should do?

29 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by igbobuigbo: 10:45pm On Mar 07, 2016
Note:

They have two kids (American citizens) who are growing up and need both parents together.

He loves and takes care of his family to the best of his ability. But he is ambitious, mobile and restless, and wants to conquer the world. Dire situation for them.

25 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by igbobuigbo: 10:57pm On Mar 07, 2016
Who is not understanding/selfish between the two?

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Duru1(m): 11:08pm On Mar 07, 2016
igbobuigbo:
A friend is in the situation described below:

Lived in Lagos until 2006
Got married in 2005 in Owerri.
Moved wife from Owerri (she was working there) to Lagos in 2005.
Moved wife from Lagos to Holland (2006-2008). He was studying for MSc; she could not work
Moved wife from Holland to UK (2008 - 2012). Obtained his PhD while wife did some okay paying, although not so great jobs.
Moved wife from UK to Minnesota, USA (he got a job with a sponsored H1 Visa) in 2012; but wife could not work with her H4 visa
Became a Green Card holder with wife in 2014. Wife started working and settling down in Minnesota.
Then he goes for a bigger job in Pennsylvania; moves wife along to Pittsburgh in 2015. Wife took several months to get a job because she is not as educationally advanced as hubby.
Now he wants to move to Washington, DC, for even a much bigger job. Wife says ''no way. This is becoming crazy. I have a life too''. I'd rather divorce than move this time''.

What do you think he should do?


Please wife should move to Washington, DC because there are many Nigerians in the metropolis. Do not divorce him at the last leg of your journey.

49 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by eyinjuege: 6:14am On Mar 08, 2016
igbobuigbo:
Who is not understanding/selfish between the two?

It's actually selfish of the man uprooting his family over and over again.

What of the children?
Having to start the whole process of making new friends and forming new attachments over and over again? I think it affects kids psychologically.

Everyone needs stability in their lives, especially at a young age.

Your friend should learn that money isn't everything.

83 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by duduade: 8:02am On Mar 08, 2016
Abeg I have a sister I can hook that your friend up with...

74 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Pavore9: 9:02am On Mar 08, 2016
While the man pursues his dreams, he should consider the need for his family to have a sense of permanency. The kids will see no reason to make friends within the neighbourhood and in school because of the thought of always being on the move.

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by byvan03: 10:27am On Mar 08, 2016
The man should give it a rest already, money is not everything.

18 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by igbobuigbo: 1:04pm On Mar 08, 2016
eyinjuege:


It's actually selfish of the man uprooting his family over and over again.

What of the children?
Having to start the whole process of making new friends and forming new attachments over and over again? I think it affects kids psychologically.

Everyone needs stability in their lives, especially at a young age.

Your friend should learn that money isn't everything.

But the uprooting is what has brought the family as a whole to the level they are in now. This is also what happens to Diplomat and military people's families being posted to various places.

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by eyinjuege: 7:35pm On Mar 08, 2016
igbobuigbo:


But the uprooting is what has brought the family as a whole to the level they are in now. This is also what happens to Diplomat and military people's families being posted to various places.

I know the uprooting has probably brought more financial stability to the family, but there comes a time in a person's life that you come to a cross road and have to choose.
The long term effect of constantly moving about on your children and making the whole money in the world. Its something that needs to be carefully thought about. Changing schools, friends,support networks you've formed isn't as easy as you think.

I wish the family good luck in whatever decision they take sha.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by TheArchangel(f): 7:57pm On Mar 08, 2016
igbobuigbo:

But the uprooting is what has brought the family as a whole to the level they are in now. This is also what happens to Diplomat and military people's families being posted to various places.
I was a victim of this type of junketeering and inability to stay at a place for a reasonable length of time. The effect on me as a child was massive. Now, I get bored easily staying at a place, can hardly hold down a job since my mindset is heavily built on the fact that i can always move to a better place, and the longest I have stayed at a place since my fourteenth birthday is 3 years. I manage to have few friends who hardly know significant details about me than what I let out.

Thank God for cyberspace/internet and its anonymous friends and enemies.



The guy in question is inconsiderate of other peoples needs and thought the world revolves around him.

40 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Nobody: 12:32am On Mar 09, 2016
igbobuigbo:
A friend is in the situation described below:

Lived in Lagos until 2006
Got married in 2005 in Owerri.
Moved wife from Owerri (she was working there) to Lagos in 2005.
Moved wife from Lagos to Holland (2006-2008). He was studying for MSc; she could not work
Moved wife from Holland to UK (2008 - 2012). Obtained his PhD while wife did some okay paying, although not so great jobs.
Moved wife from UK to Minnesota, USA (he got a job with a sponsored H1 Visa) in 2012; but wife could not work with her H4 visa
Became a Green Card holder with wife in 2014. Wife started working and settling down in Minnesota.
Then he goes for a bigger job in Pennsylvania; moves wife along to Pittsburgh in 2015. Wife took several months to get a job because she is not as educationally advanced as hubby.
Now he wants to move to Washington, DC, for even a much bigger job. Wife says ''no way. This is becoming crazy. I have a life too''. I'd rather divorce than move this time''.

What do you think he should do?
i luv the nigga real hustler very ambi and want to strike gold..tell u friend to calm down when dem appiont the guy minister of petrolium as kackiwu so go regret it..u dey american..many girl dey nijia with lazy hubby plus no nepa light

13 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Okijajuju1(m): 5:41pm On Mar 09, 2016
grin grin grin

Chai!


Meanwhile some Girls for Naija go love this guy die.. grin


Their Instagram page no go rest at all.. grin

37 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by BigElEddy(m): 5:43pm On Mar 09, 2016
byvan03:
The man should give it a rest already, money is not everything.

What a pile of crap!

12 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by delishpot: 5:43pm On Mar 09, 2016
That man gat no chill. Haba, his family are human beings too na. He has been pursuing his dreams what of the wife? He should calm down a bit. Money is good but not at the expense of other people's esp ones loved ones happiness.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by MsGlobalwonder(f): 5:44pm On Mar 09, 2016
igbobuigbo:
Who is not understanding/selfish between the two?
the man! He needs to slow down a little. Haba! The woman has a life too. She can't be living under his shadows for life!

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by BigElEddy(m): 5:44pm On Mar 09, 2016
He took ya ragged ass from nigeria now you are yanning bullshit.

But its none of my business sha.

7 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by pabjo: 5:44pm On Mar 09, 2016
OK na there choice to start na still there choice to separate
Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by kaziblake(f): 5:47pm On Mar 09, 2016
This is serious.

The woman has a life too,the man shldnt think of himself only,He shld consider his wife and his kids.In this type of situation the kids education suffer the most.

1 Like

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Atlantian: 5:48pm On Mar 09, 2016
I support the divorce.

3 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by zigalo(m): 5:48pm On Mar 09, 2016
This is a good problem

8 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by zigalo(m): 5:49pm On Mar 09, 2016
Good problem
Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Nobody: 5:49pm On Mar 09, 2016
God forbid for such a selfish man!

1 Like

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by omolola15(m): 5:49pm On Mar 09, 2016
duduade:
Abeg I have a sister I can hook that your friend up with...

GOLD DIGGER. DIGGING GOLD WITH BULLDOZER SINCE 1668.

17 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by omostar: 5:50pm On Mar 09, 2016
Why can't the wife simply stay in one place for a while and the husband comes vising regularly grin

16 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by omolola15(m): 5:51pm On Mar 09, 2016
Owo ni koko. Make she go jare.

2 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by einsteino(m): 5:52pm On Mar 09, 2016
This is one of the reasons why I have been single for a while. If you are ambitious, you would know how much of a stumbling block marriage and serious relationships can be. I cherish the freedom of being able to leave for space the very next second, if thats the next goal to conquer.

I have no advice for this couple cos either ways one person would get hurt.. If the husby compromises he would see his wife as "his enemy of progress", if the wife does she would see the husby as the reason why she never amounted to anything more than his wife.

My advice is rather to young men like myself and ladies. Love is a great feeling but hey it isnt as important as compatibility. Know your partner well, be sure you fit into each others plans well. To yall accusing the husby of being selfish, there is nothing wrong with what the husby is doing, the prob is his kind of wife is equally ambitious. some ladies I know would give an arm and a foot to shuttle from city to city with a husby that is successful, some wouldnt mind being full time housewives so long as the money is rolling in. His only sin is not choosing a wife that fits into his plans... The wife also has every right to be ambitious, I love ambitious women... But she too never reached any agreement on what next after wedding.

For guys especially, make sure u achieve the fundamental goals first before talking about marriage. If at all you are in a hurry to wed a gal cos u love her too much to risk losing her, endeavour to point out to her your plans. I have fallen in love countless times but when I look at my plans and see the person wouldnt fit in or the love of my life came prematurely, my brain overrules my heart. Fear not, the heart would always find someone else to love, that is its specialty.

44 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by ORACLE1975(m): 5:52pm On Mar 09, 2016
What about the children?

1 Like

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by knightsTempler: 5:52pm On Mar 09, 2016
A man gotta do what a man gotta gotta do, yolo !

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Shedybliss98(m): 5:53pm On Mar 09, 2016
what if the husband had left the wife in Nigeria to stay permanent, and do the whole relocating himself?

7 Likes

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by Burger01(m): 5:53pm On Mar 09, 2016
I thought marriage na for better for worse... I don't even know which is better or worse in this scenario sad angry

This man should stay somewhere and be contented jare angry

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Wife To Separate From Husband For Relocating Too Much by tosynomolara(f): 5:53pm On Mar 09, 2016
He should b considerate dis can b so frustrating .... mayb he should just leave his family in one convinent place and b checking on den...... shekina

2 Likes

(1) (2) (3) (4) (Reply)

What's So Special About Your Age That You Hide It? / Thank God For A Beautiful Outing To Celebrate The First Day Of The Year. Photos / Nigerian Lady Tattoos Her Son’s Face On Her Back (photos)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 68
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.