Dear Bunmi,

I am a Nigerian young lady in my 30’s and I reside in one of the Asian countries. My problem is I always feel pain during sex and this has been going on for many years, a friend asked me to write you so that you could be of help. My believe was that this is what every woman goes through, until she told me i needed help, I’ll really much appreciate your kind advice…thanking you in anticipation.
Rofiatu
By e-mail

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Dear Rofiatu,

Feeling pain during sex is quite unusual and something you should have had a check up on at a health centre when it started. The pain could possibly be a sign of vaginal infection. Please kindly visit any health centre close to you and log in this complaint, so they could run some tests and find out what is wrong with you before it gets out of hands.

Bunmi

ask@dearbunmi.com
http://dearbunmi.com/feel-pain-sex/

sorry

Its better you c a doctor

i create post s.eun they view and he no fit reply nor like, the thing pain me pass ur vargina abeg.

U sure say no be rokiatu

go for a spiritual cleansing already

I don't think it's as a result of a vaginal infection. What i suspect is that you were circumcised (genitally mutilated) while young. You are not the only one, about 70% of Nigerian ladies ages 20yrs and above currently alive today are circumcised.

Circumcision is usually practiced on females to lower or kill their sexual appetite completely so that they won't be wayward thus keep their virginity for their husbands.
But unfortunately the disadvantages outweigh the advantages and one of them is what you are experiencing. Difficulty during child labor and VVF are other disadvantages.

Thank God the federal government is trying to put an end to the practice now.
You can read more on the topic but i don't think anyone should still be ignorant on the topic of female circumcision in Nigeria today.

Dejideji1:
I don't think it's as a result of a vaginal infection. What i suspect is that you were circumcised (genitally mutilated) while young. You are not the only one, about 70% of Nigerian ladies ages 20yrs and above currently alive today are circumcised.

Circumcision is usually practiced on females to lower or kill their sexual appetite completely so that they won't be wayward thus keep their virginity for their husbands.
But unfortunately the disadvantages outweigh the advantages and one of them is what you are experiencing. Difficulty during child labor and VVF are other disadvantages.

Thank God the federal government is trying to put an end to the practice now.
You can read more on the topic but i don't think anyone should still be ignorant on the topic of female circumcision in Nigeria today.

well circumcision has its relations with painful sex,,,buh Bumni is totally correct,, infection is the leading causes of painful intercourse,, followed by other anatomical and physiological effects wch is caused by several factors,, one of them occurs with former rape victims that causes the virginal to narrow upon sexual stimulation due to past negative and traumatising flash memories.

edetty:

well circumcision has its relations with painful sex,,,buh Bumni is totally correct,, infection is the leading causes of painful intercourse,, followed by other anatomical and physiological effects wch is caused by several factors,, one of them occurs with former rape victims that causes the virginal to narrow upon sexual stimulation due to past negative and traumatising flash memories.

Why I suspected circumcision was that she clearly stated that it has been long (many years) imagine if it was actually an infection i don't think she would have been able to bear it that long because it would have degenerated into something more serious.

Secondly she said she thought it was a general problem with all women. I can easily interpret that statement to mean it has always been a painful experience for her, not that it started at a particular time in which case we can begin to suspect an infection.
So with all this, circumcision is my best guess for her

Dejideji1:


Why I suspected circumcision was that she clearly stated that it has been long (many years) imagine if it was actually an infection i don't think she would have been able to bear it that long because it would have degenerated into something more serious.

Secondly she said she thought it was a general problem with all women. I can easily interpret that statement to mean it has always been a painful experience for her, not that it started at a particular time in which case we can begin to suspect an infection.
So with all this, circumcision is my best guess for her

well allow me to correct both an impression and educate u a lil,.,.,.the first one is,,,most humans are very naive abt their anatomy and physiology (simple body biology),, I once had to teach a colleague how to calculate her menstrual cycle,, a third year medical biochemistry student she was,,well it's not so much in line with her course,,I have also educated quite a lot of ladies that they have three holes within their pelvic region,, the anus,the virginal and the urinary orifice(the outlet were urine passes out in females,, some or most only think the virginal carries out this function,, the virginal only doubles as a birth canal only,,,in essence wat am saying is,there exist the possibility of naivety on her part to assume it's common on all females,,she cld be the shy and timid type(a loner),so many people are like that,,and she cld outrightly be an introvert,,, who doesn't like bothering people and doesn't research too,,,so that's the first clarification,, secondly,,, infections in women manifests itself very differently from male,,a man can be affected with candidiasis and the symptoms manifests in few hours to few days as mouth thrush,,,buh a woman can practically stay with it for years without any overly serious physical complications or signs,,,some illnesses in women don't even trouble them that much,,and can survive for 10-20yrs,,each person that have unprotected sex with them gets infected immediately,, and the worst case scenario of this for women is the diagnosis is manifested after childbirth (mostly their first child),, in various ways,, let me list two possible ways,,,an infected women can Carry a sex linked disease that she passes onto the male offspring only,,,or the child (both male/fenale) be born with physical deformations,, e.g as seen in the eyes,heart,nose,teeth and mouth,,,chest,,,etc,,, visit the clinic often u will confirm all I just told u

edetty:

,, I once had to teach a colleague how to calculate her menstrual cycle,, a third year medical biochemistry student she was,,well it's not so much in line with her course,,I have also educated quite a lot of ladies that they have three holes within their pelvic region,, the anus,the virginal and the urinary orifice(the outlet were urine passes out in females,, some or most only think the virginal carries out this function,, the virginal only doubles as a birth canal only,,,

You got me shell shocked with those two revelations bro particularly the second one. Infact I'm still in shock as I'm typing this........ What could be responsible for such extreme levels of ignorance/naivety on the part of those ladies?........ Speechless...........

Dejideji1:


You got me shell shocked with those two revelations bro particularly the second one. Infact I'm still in shock as I'm typing this........ What could be responsible for such extreme levels of ignorance/naivety on the part of those ladies?........ Speechless...........

Well 1. lack of curiosity,, to explore or depends on their level of sex education,, 2. the taboo our parents place on sex education,thinking it will only cause more damage,,,3. some girls just assume our body system are almost exactly similar in function and structure,,, we guys use our dick for urinary and sexual purposes,, so the virginal serves same function,, not knowing it's different entirely

edetty:

Well 1. lack of curiosity,, to explore or depends on their level of sex education,, 2. the taboo our parents place on sex education,thinking it will only cause more damage,,,3. some girls just assume our body system are almost exactly similar in function and structure,,, we guys use our dick for urinary and sexual purposes,, so the virginal serves same function,, not knowing it's different entirely

Well except those girls grew up in the village and probably didn't attend a secondary school where they would have acquired such rudimentary knowledge.

But curiosity is a general characteristic of all human beings (intelligent beings) although the level of curiosity in women is quite low when compared to that of men and it is one of the reasons why we have very few female inventors/discoveries.

edetty:

Well 1. lack of curiosity,, to explore or depends on their level of sex education,, 2. the taboo our parents place on sex education,thinking it will only cause more damage,,, 3. some girls just assume our body system are almost exactly similar in function and structure,,, we guys use our dick for urinary and sexual purposes,, so the virginal serves same function,, not knowing it's different entirely

That's the in thing, the base on which other complications stand...

Until recent times when people start knowing better, Some people can't even look themselves up in the mirror for the fear of going immoral and ungodly. To touch carnal parts a big no no. I'm not hyping it.

bitchcrafts:
That's the in thing, the base on which other complications stand...

Until recent times when people start knowing better, Some people can't even look themselves up in the mirror for the fear of going immoral and ungodly. To touch carnal parts a big no no. I'm not hyping it.

Yeah bro,,glad u get my point

Dejideji1:


Well except those girls grew up in the village and probably didn't attend a secondary school where they would have acquired such rudimentary knowledge.

But curiosity is a general characteristic of all human beings (intelligent beings) although the level of curiosity in women is quite low when compared to that of men and it is one of the reasons why we have very few female inventors/discoveries.

we are still speaking the same Inglish,,,and it doesn't depend on location or geography,,, village girls even know their body far more than city girls at certain age bracket,,sch or not,,,because of less mentoring,, monitoring and etc,, unlike the city girls,,,I even mentioned in my above post,abt a classmate,, I had to teach how to calculate menstrual cycle properly,, this is an aje butter chick,,, 20yrs in 300L in a medical college,,so ur logic is flawed..