Wait, wait and wait. Before you go all religious and self righteous, just hear me out a bit, and if you choose to, please do so with an open mind, devoid of any religious or self conflicting moral code or self righteousness.

Now, I believe everybody is well aware who a baby daddy is. In as much as society frown at a woman or man (especially a woman) having a child outside wedlock, I'll want us to look at reasons why being a baby daddy should be welcome in Nigeria, given that all what we hear about marriage, is one form of complain, abuse, violent conduct, and sometimes death as the case may be.

So, here are just five reasons why I so much feel being a baby daddy is the best thing one can think of:

1. Peace Of Mind: Lets face it, if one is a baby daddy, one do not even have to worry or loose sleep over night, over the affairs of ones partner. I mean, face it, especially in today's society, where most women, more often that not, have high blood pressure because they continue to disturb their self, over the affairs of their spouse, most especially if he is the one who keeps late night, flirt and philander.

2. Freedom: Yes, some will say freedom is not absolute, others will even say freedom is fleeting, but hey, if one is a baby daddy, one have the freedom to do whatever he want, because there will be nobody crying or loosing sleep over what he is doing. That's why being a baby daddy is not just good, but must be welcome by anybody who truly value his freedom and want peace of mind.

3. No Nagging: This is among the best reason, as most baby daddies, will say a heavy "Hell Yes" to this point. A baby daddy will have almost absolute rest of mind not having a nagging wife, too robust for comfort, nagging over everything and anything he does, because for one, he doesn't have to live with her, or even see it fit to spend time with her, what matters to him is just the betterment of his kid, not necessarily that of the woman.

4. It Is Less Expensive: Yep, everybody will agree that, it is much better and less expensive, feeding and taking care of one person, than two persons, because hey, truth be told, taking care of a woman is damn expensive, talk less of taking care of a baby, then, talk less of taking care of a woman and a baby together, most especially a woman who wants to sit on her ass and do absolutely nothing, other than watch Telemundo, drive fancy cars and nag all day and grow fat at the expense of her husband.

5. No Case Of Jealousy Or Envy: Aye! I've never seen, neither have I heard of a case where a baby daddy is jealous of his baby mama, talk less of losing sleep over her activities or trying to police her movement about who she sleeps with, or hang around with.

Conclusively, I'll urge people to take a look at our very renown baby daddies: Flavor, Olamide and Wizkid, and tell me if they're not really enjoying all the benefit listed above to the fullest, as they don't really worry over what most married men and married women worry about these days. That's why its best to shove society's expectations of us aside, when our happiness and peace of mind is at stake.

Cutehector:
Wat sort of arrant fuckery is this

Jolsnow:
Don't be án asshole.
How does this benefit the baby or the mum?

Mopricelezz:
Baby Daddy huh?

mimzy:
Selfish...

ShaqFu:
I believe that's the title of Kim Kardashian's book. But hey, look at the bright side, at least its better than the alternative, which is usually physical abusive or death.

ShaqFu:
Yep, baby daddy, you should consider being a baby mama also.

postmann:
This belongs to the gutters, Mr Shaq Fu!!! Completely irresponsible and self-seeking. You must have planned every aspect of your life --- your lust, carefree attitude etc quite ahead of the child whom you already planned to give an imbalanced life just to make yourself convenient.

A Child deserves a normal home with a loving mom and dad.

mimzy:



Nope..

The difference is you didn't even give it a chance at all

You killed 'it' before it even had an opportunity to live n survive...

Cutehector:
Wat sort of arrant fuckery is this

postmann:
This belongs to the gutters, Mr ShaqFu!!! Completely irresponsible and self-seeking. You must have planned every aspect of your life --- your lust, carefree attitude etc quite ahead of the child whom you already planned to give an imbalanced life just to make yourself convenient.

A Child deserves a normal home with a loving mom and dad.

ShaqFu:
Yea, I child deserve all that, but what happens when the marriage collapse? Does a child deserve to live in a home where there isn't an atom of happiness? Where there one form of fighting or quarreling almost everyday.

We make plans, and sometimes, that plan doesn't work out. And then, what next?

postmann:



It would be better you had given your marriage the best shot of survival and planned to raise a kid with all the advantages of a happy, balanced home than premeditatedly built a disastrous atmosphere for an innocent child.

When that child grows up; you wouldn't get to tell him the flimsy reason his mother wasn't ever around was because of the bull crap of reasons you sited up there. Rather you'd tell him how hard you tried but she didn't stay and what your experiences and failings were in your marriage (just as for illustration; this is not your portion). And he'll pick up from there to be a better husband and father, learning from your mistakes.

You can't prepare him to fail just because you want the fruits of marriage without the ploughing and sowing.

#GreedyShaqFu

MrObontami:
Inasmuch i will be allowed to fcccl other girls its fcccking ok my me

ShaqFu:
Now which married woman will smile of even allow his husband fuck_ other girls?

MrObontami:


i doubt there is any ??

ShaqFu:
At what expense? The expense of not ever talking to the mother of your child? Or hating her more than you hate the devil? Come on bro, loosen up, no everyone desire to be trapped in the age old contract call 'marriage'.

ShaqFu:

On the contrary, when the child grows up, he'll get to know what it really mean for one to have happiness, devoid of society's expectations and the likes.

ShaqFu:


Remember, I never opined that the child will be left uncared for, or even abandoned, he still have his mother, and hey, he can visit his grand parents and spend time with them, and of course, his father.

Remember bro, marriage isn't for everyone.

postmann:


Marriage and parenthood are for people who are selfless and highly responsible. People who are sacrificial and devotional. People who can put others' needs ahead of theirs. People who can live for others.

Mr ShaqFu, until you attain these attributes, you have no moral right to either father a child or make a woman yours.

You mean when the child grows up, he will get to know it doesn't take a good dose of responsibility and selfsacrifice to become a father. Or if she's a girl, she can actual father 3 kids from 3 different men in the name of happiness which you mistook for selfishness and irresponsibility.

Thanks for once again displaying your acute sense of selfishness and irresponsibility. So you sow your wild oaths in the depth of a woman and when it's time for responsibility, you pass the baton to the mother and grandparents while you live foot lose and fancy free!!!!

Take a study on the ills of children raised by single parent.

Mindfulness:
Well, I don't share OP's views but I also wonder where you got your views from.



I diasgree. For a marriage to be successful each partner has to selfishly care about him- and herself IN THE FIRST PLACE. Selfish, in this context, does not mean that you disregard or disrespect your partner but that you make sure that you are so abundant, in emotional and pragmatic sense, that giving is a pleasure and not sacrifice.

A happy marriage does not feel like hard work and sacrifice, it feels easy and it flows (most of the time) and it is enriching and not sacrificial.




He doesn't want to make a woman his and this is what the thread is actually about. If you want to convince him of the privileges and advantages of marriage, then advertise for it instead of confirming to him the negative reasons why he doesn't want to get married.




It doesn't take any responibility and sacrifice to become a father. It takes a few minutes of pleasure. Being a father is a whole different thing. And no, I wouldn't tell my kids that I had to sacrifice anything to be a parent. I would tell them that it took love and that having them made my life more beautiful and not harder.

Again, too many people make marriage and parenthood look like it is some sort of experience that you need to have strength for, when all it takes for it to be successful is love, passion and joy.

I don't wake up in the morning, saying 'God, give me strength to sacrifice my sleep to make breakfast for my family.' I wake up and I look forward to having my family at one table. I enjoy it.




This is not what he said. He wants kids and not a relationship / marriage and with the way you people talk about marriage, I can understand him.



What about children raised in high-conflict marriages? Are they better off? Anyway, that's a different topic.

postmann:


I gave you a loud cry like Paris when the Germans were about to run that city over but you stood aloof and watched from a distance.

I'll not take time to nitpick your submissions but I'll leave you with this:

Love alone doesn't work in marriage or even parenting. Sacrifice does and it goes a long way. Sacrifice comes in different forms and names. And another name for it is "understanding".

I think you share alot with the OP.

Mindfulness:


If you want to live your marriage feeling that you have to sacrifice anything, good luck with that.
I will much rather live my marriage feeling that it enriches my life.


You can sulk as much as you want. I don't vote for anyone because someone asks me to, you get my vote if I feel that you are worthy of it.
Simples!

postmann:


You might need a good understanding of the word sulk. You're a woman, I expect denial to be a good part of your psyche.

Sacrifice is part of marriage and apart from understanding another name for it is tolerance.

Now dream on!

Mindfulness:


And someone like you expects women to respect him.
You can't get it without being able to lead by example.
And you should be ashamed of making this kind of generalizations. I would understand it if you had no education at all but my tolerance of this nonsense is limited to people who have never seen a school from the inside.



Part of whose marriage? Yours?



I will without you telling me to.