I have actually came across men that tell me there's nothing wrong with a man havin having extra-marital affairs with other women.
They believe a farmer should grow his seeds anywhere (can't even remember the way they put it) but we ladies have to stick to one.

Those MEN are stupid.

it's the women that accept and agree to date them knowing they're married that are actually stupid.

Hi,

It is just a cultural thing with Africans. But strongly i believe now adays it is an individual thing.

mamba:

it's the women that accept and agree to date them knowing they're married that are actually stupid.

Completely agree, Some women will know that a man is married and still go out with him, hoping he dumps his wife for her.

mamba:

it's the women that accept and agree to date them knowing they're married that are actually stupid.

ijebuman:

Completely agree, Some women will know that a man is married and still go out with him, hoping he dumps his wife for her.

I agree to an extent.

But again, why is the man going around looking for girls to date in the first place. Haba look at it form the other point of view. That means he is not satisfied with what he's got. Don't think d babes want to marry the chap. At least not in all scenarios o. Majoriy are interested in the financial benefits derivable. And many men have fallen prey well-giving up colloquial assets just to make these babes theirs.

If the guy can stop soliciting, the girls will not have patronizers abi.

So invariably both parties are stupid, don't u think?

hot-angel:

Those MEN are stupid.

spoken like a true chick.

But again, why is the man going around looking for girls to date in the first place.

It's quite obvious: the men are looking for fresher, younger bodies to have sex with. For many men, what they get from women is the ultimate pleasure they have in their lives.

Majority [of girls] are interested in the financial benefits derivable.

The men are aware of this, but for some reason they feel that the sex and the additional respect they get is worth what they pay for it! These "home-breakers" are basically sophisticated prostitutes.

Its not about sex alone. There are so many reasons people (not just Men but Women too  ) engage in extramarital affairs, there isn't any 'one size fits all' explanation to it.

I don't think having affairs when you're married is ok but in the Nigerian context so many people get married for the wrong reasons, some too early and some to someone they are not compatible with. Then you also have some naive girls who think they can snag a man by getting pregnant so the man has no choice but to get married (and you expect him to be faithful, yeah right!!!).

I just think we need to change our whole attitude to marriage, our society expects everyone to be married and that means that the whole marriage institution is not really seen in the context of sharing and spending your life with someone you love, but more like something you need to do to please your family and friends.

ahoy LT:

It is just a cultural thing with Africans.

Are u kidding me ?

Anyway men that stray do it coz they dont get enough from their
wives or their wives no longer look sexy to them
so wives u'v really gotta make ur man
feel on top of the world
let him feel he's lucky to have U

they dont know Jesus!

Renike:

they don't know Jesus!

actually, many of them do.

Well! I believe so many men do it to compensate themselves of treasures they lavished on their wives before getting married to her. Take for instance in NIGER, where a man is charged something close to a fortune by his in-laws before taking a wife. I mean who will pay so much, and after discover's he still bought thesame old thing and would not want a change.

@allonym
mm, then dat is bad news..isnt it?
cos i dont believe God is too happy abt adultery cos dat is wat an affair is basically all abt.

I think both men and women who do that are in d stupid category.
if not , the woman who dates the married man for financial and whatever reason will someday get married and wouldn't want to hear or see such evil in her home. My husband having extramarital affair? It devastates a woman. So the earlier she desist the better if not the law of reaping what one sows or fate may crawl in later for her.

Then the man who thinks its ok is as stupid as the woman cos, he is the loser, guilty of adultery and unfaithfulness. Whatever pleasure he gets or derives is shortlived. besides its his money which would have been better invested that is draining on a woman he is not planning to have a future with.
So there is no reason to think its ok. its not. Marriage vow dosent include that going by the religiously values.

In the begining:

The Woman was made for the Man, not the Man for the Woman.

Sex is sin, whether with your wife or not, that's the reason Jesus Christ was concieved without sex, although Mary was happily married to Mr Joseph.

But it is an Abomination, when the woman is another man's wife.

There is no place in the scriptures where it is categorically stated that having more than one woman is abhored by God. But the scripture calls a married woman engaging in sexual relationships with other men as Adulterous.

King David for instance had so many wives and concubines, but when he slept with another man's wife, God rebuked him. I am sure David is currently in a place where those who preach "one man, one wife" may not get to.

If your Gbola will cause you to sin, please cut it off! It is better to enter the kingdom without the Gbola, because you wouldn't need it there anyway.


Na me talk am!

women are partly to blame too. they participate in these premarital affairs and some see nothing wrong with divorcing some person from their family.

its a two way thing, men cheat, and women do too, but what I find incredibly annoying is the fact that it becomes a stigma on a woman who cheats, while a man who cheats is classfied as the 'DON'. and hell yes.... 9ja men are 100% guilty of cheating on thier wives/ chicks,...

how can u say such a thing? have u heard me cheat before?

oya lie and say u have never!!! .. THERE IS NO MAN IN THIS WORLD ( EXCEPT JESUS, MOSES,ELIJAH AND SOME SERIOUSLY ANNOINTED MEN OF GOD) that hasnt cheated... .. even pastors gaaaaaaaaaaaaannn... some get K leg...

so u v cheated on ur BF before?

Haba! If anyone is that HOT behind sex, then they should remain single!

is being single a license to roam around?

@ deji, no i havent cheated on my bf before...

what about the one before this one? or the one before that?

na u sabi.. the one before this one is still the same one...

so u v never cheated on anyone before?

**rolling eyes** @ such persistence to get her to say she has cheated

don't mind me, i just want to hear story...

NO IVE NEVER CHEATED!!! whats ur definition of cheating by the way?

ABIMBOLA77:

NO IVE NEVER CHEATED!!! whats your definition of cheating by the way?

Virtuous woman. Keep it up. Ladies in the house, this a woman to emulate...

a man or woman should never cheat on each other, even if they're yet to get married. the problem with niger is that a lot of people get together for the wrong reasons, and when they realise what they've gotten into, they start searching for a way out, also most nigerian men will continue to cheat on their wives because they learnt same from thier parents. so parents should bring up thier children in the right way, maybe this will help avert this sort of behaviour among our people.

justme:

a man or woman should never cheat on each other, even if they're yet to get married. the problem with niger is that a lot of people get together for the wrong reasons, and when they realise what they've gotten into, they start searching for a way out, also most nigerian men will continue to cheat on their wives because they learnt same from their parents. so parents should bring up their children in the right way, maybe this will help avert this sort of behaviour among our people.

tank u jare my sister.. i cant stand the way our parents ( albeit 85% of them), take cheating like 2nd nature, and they then end up sleeping in different rooms.. that just annoys the crap out of me.. i even know of a guy who helps his popsy hook up chicks from his uni.. talk about madness