my dear people, help me with this one please.
late last month, i fell seriously sick. my girlfriend was more than caring during that period. in fact she nursed me to good health. now, this girl of mine had a guy whom she was dating before she met me. in fact, she worshipped this guy. but then, i liked her and was willing to take my chances. i showered her with 'more than enough love than she could handle' to the point that we started considering getting married at the end of the year.

but as our relationship progressed, i noticed that my girl was still attached to the other guy. talk about rekindling a dying fire. my girl started blowing hot and cold. today she will tell me that she has made up her mind to be with me, tomorrow it is the other guy she will choose. the thing got me so emotionally bruised, but i still hung on because i loved her and good things don't come cheap.

it got to a point that my girl told me to my face that if she did not marry the other guy, it would seem she had a divorce. that was a red light for me. i decided to back out of the relationship, though i did not tell her. later that night, she sent me an sms, saying that she cannot do without me and that we should go on. i knew i had to call her for a serious talk.

she cried and lamented that she was at a cross road and that she does not know whom to choose. by now, this guy had started placing tabs on my girl and i. he stalked our every move and told my girl all he had gathered. i felt that my girl needed all the encouragement in this moment of choice. i tried to be as caring as possible.

then i decided to dig up some info about 'my rival' and my discoveries could stun even a stallion. suffice me to say that my girl had been living on illusions and empty promises about the guy she so adored. i felt like telling her this, but i refrained from doing so.

my elder cousin also knew the other guy and tried to talk some sense to my girl. she (my cousin) told her the truth about the other guy and my girl was devastated. my girl even attested to some facts that my cousin revealed to her. there and then, my girl told me that she had made up her mind to be with me. she said she never knew she had been living in dreamsland with the guy all the while.

so, i was just recovering from my illness when my girl told me point blank that she felt we needed space. she said that she was tired of relationships and needed her space. i was shocked. though i tried hard to convince her, her mind was made up. i decided to let her be.

surviving without her seemed so difficult. the days were lonely as i missed her even more. she stopped calling me and visiting. i braced myself for the reality of the fact that we might not date anymore.

then 2 days ago, she started calling me to find out how i was. i felt she wanted us to be together again, but i was mistaken. she told me point blank that she wanted to be left alone. she further said that she wants us to go our separate ways as she could not continue with the relationship any longer. so, i told her that she should have told me that all the while instead of changing her attitude towards me for the worse. i told her if ending the relationship was what she wanted, then fine - there was no us anymore.

friends, did i do the right thing? i blame myself for allowing my cousin tell her all those things about her other guy maybe we would have still been together. or what do you think? responses please.

sorry for the lengthy piece. i hope you could make sense out of it. i had no time to edit it before posting.

First of all, sorry for the broken heart, you've proved yourself to be a guy of loving quality.

YES. . . . . YES . . . . . YES. . . . YES, YOU DID THE RIGHT THING, now let me land from my private jet

The girl has never been yours, all along while you thought you guys were dating, she wasn't yours. You were just dreaming and THANK god, you've finally woken up and i hope for good.

Believe me i know from experience that ripping someone away from their relationships is an A-CLASS mistake. And if you had continued with her, you'ld have turned into her slave because you wouldn't want to do or say anything that'll hurt her so she dosen't run back into the other guy's arms and you'll find yourself thinking it ok when she's with him just in the name of love. It wouldn't have been right. That's not love

If you'll be patint, let me give you my own true life story:
During my secondary days, there was this girl that was best friends with this other girl, but i liked this girl soo much and wanted her to be my best friend, i wanted her to leave her other friend.
I feel so stupid now but i did everything for her to notice me, to the extent that the girl now fell in love with me (not romantically oo)
I showered her with gifts, my neighbour in calss who knew what was going on and knew my inentions now called us out of class one night (it was a boarding school), and said she thought it was best if the girl in question chose amongst i and the other girl, who she wanted as her best friend.
To our greatest surprise, she chose me. . . . .  .BUT i can honestly tell you it didn't work out. WHY? cause she wasn't rightfully mine. They both later found back together and i accepted it with my whole heart though i was a bit hurt. but i knew deep inside me the friendship we shared was bought, not earned, it was a scam, not the real thing.

That day i believed in the fact that: what Godhas joined together, let no man put assunder.

My dear, it shall be well. And for your sake never think of getting back with her.Let her be, and very soon i'm sure you'll find your one and only. Someone who'll love you, and you alone. Someone you wouldn't have to share with another guy, someone whose heart is not divided.
Good luck and stay strong Your best is yet to come.

yeah i think you did the right thing, i don't see why she would be playing you like that, its not fair, sorry u got ur heart broken but you gotta move on

@ ladies

Thank you !!!

Here's a guys opinion

@poster

Sorry Man about everything, i know it aint easy to lose a loved one but you ll get over it . . . . . eventually.
You didnt do anything wrong (unless of course if you didnt mention it in your post!)
she deserved to hear the truth about her other guy.

Dont feel bad about her needing space, we all do from time to time, she may be back yet and then you ll have to decide for real to get back or not, i have this opinion because you seem to have been a truly loving and caring boyfriend.

however, you chose to risk entering a love triangle and your angle has become decidededly acute,

my advice to you is to keep on holding on, you ll find someone else.

All the best