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If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You - Romance - Nairaland

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If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by nalijah07(f): 8:30pm On May 06, 2010
I have a friend who curses and disrespects her husband so badly. I have tried talking to her and she always just plays it down saying, "he is not going anywhere".

It looks like she is right, because whenever I see them out in public, they look so normal. All of this is done behind closed doors and often in front of the kids. I just wonder how he feels as a man to have this happen on a regular basis. shocked
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Pweety4me(f): 8:40pm On May 06, 2010
Is there more 2 it?
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Areaboy2(m): 8:45pm On May 06, 2010
there's nothing she's doing thats new. some women just turn a different page when they get married and just cant be logical anymore,
most men just learn to adjust to the change, others that cant, end up with a sill divorce tongue

my dad always says women think thru their behind, i'm starting to see meaning to this undecided
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Blazay(m): 8:46pm On May 06, 2010
The same way a woman goes on after a man has belittled her.
You swallow your pride, communicate your feelings and dislikes and hope for the best.
I think, it is called love.
Life is not perfect.

Belittling people is the trade mark of black people generally. I think it is a cultural thing, because of too much sufferhead life.
Yet they still care for you but have poor communication skills.
You just have to be patient and teach her better ways to communicate.
Her parents probably did the same to her all her life.
Just be patient if you care enough.
The next one will be no better.
Work with what you have till you have exhausted all avenues.
Keep communicating and don't let it rub off on you.
The last thing you want to be is an emotionally abusive person like she is.
You are in a better position to make her a better person, for mutual benefits.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Pweety4me(f): 8:48pm On May 06, 2010
Blazay:

The same way a woman goes on after a man has belittled her.
You swallow your pride, communicate your feelings and dislikes and hope for the best.
I think, it is called love.
Life is not perfect.
No stup,idity.

1 Like

Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Osama10(m): 8:53pm On May 06, 2010
Simple,belittle her back even worse than she did.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Blazay(m): 8:57pm On May 06, 2010
Not stupidity. They are married. Love conquers all, even if it takes ages.


nalijah07:

I have a friend who curses and disrespects her husband so badly. I have tried talking to her and she always just plays it down saying, "he is not going anywhere".

It looks like she is right, because whenever I see them out in public, they look so normal. All of this is done behind closed doors and often in front of the kids. I just wonder how he feels as a man to have this happen on a regular basis. shocked

The man is doing the right thing. One day, the lady will wake up and find him gone. It is a marriage with children involved. The man is looking at the bigger picture. Not every man wants to go chasing skirts and marrying more than one wife. You guys should keep educating her. She is only acting on what she knows. Which is poor upbringing and bad communication skills. Most women who never had fathers at home or had legitimately married parents in a cordial domestic environment usually act like this. Men too. It is all about behaviour modification. Some therapy might help too. Some kind of private counselling session with a pastor or a shrink.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Nobody: 12:15am On May 07, 2010
I just wonder how he feels as a man to have this happen on a regular basis



must you interfere?

He's grown and can handle his own business.

a lot of men tune out when women are talking anyway, so its quite possible he does that regardless of the situation.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by ElRazur: 12:19am On May 07, 2010
nalijah07:

I have a friend who curses and disrespects her husband so badly. I have tried talking to her and she always just plays it down saying, "he is not going anywhere".

It looks like she is right, because whenever I see them out in public, they look so normal. All of this is done behind closed doors and often in front of the kids. I just wonder how he feels as a man to have this happen on a regular basis. shocked

`Sounds like what Madam Tpia puts me through on this forum and yet, I still like her. grin
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by madlady(f): 7:07am On May 07, 2010
.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by MissyB1(m): 9:20am On May 07, 2010
I Laugh in Spanish @ ''Love Conquers all''

The man who said ''There's a Limit to Human endurance'' isn't a Fooool.
When the man reaches his Yield strength and he reacts brutally [Leaving or beating her]
She go realise seh na new Dawn. cheesy
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Onchedu(m): 9:32am On May 07, 2010
One day jungle go mature for that woman. Myt not even be the man that'l react to her stupidity, contempt and arrogance.

Personally I don't take trash. If I'm being a good husband and father and my woman won't respect me there's no need to interact with her. I'll totally withdraw from her and ignore her. We'll become no more than a technical couple.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by candylips(m): 9:57am On May 07, 2010
the girl don use jazz for the man jare
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by harakiri(m): 10:46am On May 07, 2010
From my observation,this kind of crap happens mostly to guys who are 100% loyal,loving,caring and affectionate to their wives. Their wives know that no matter what happens,the man will never abandon them. . .so they take advantage. The woman's reply to the poster says it all (he is not going anywhere). Imagine that! Why is that women are always whining about not enough good men out there and when they find one,they treat him like crap? She has the balls to do this becoz she believes she has him tied down. If the guy was intolerant and ready to drop her like a hot potato at the slightest provocation,she wouldnt dare do what she is doing. These are one of the reasons why i'm not keen on marriage anytime soon. I dont need unecessary stress. Marriage sucks. . . BIG TIME.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by MissyB1(m): 10:49am On May 07, 2010
harakiri:

From my observation,this kind of crap happens mostly to guys who are 100% loyal,loving,caring and affectionate to their wives. Their wives know that no matter what happens,the man will never abandon them. . .so they take advantage. The woman's reply to the poster says it all (he is not going anywhere). Imagine that! Why is that women are always whining about not enough good men out there and when they find one,they treat him like crap? She has the balls to do this becoz she believes she has him tied down. If the guy was intolerant and ready to drop her like a hot potato at the slightest provocation,she wouldnt dare do what she is doing. These are one of the reasons why i'm not keen on marriage anytime soon. I dont need unecessary stress. Marriage sucks. . . BIG TIME.
shocked
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by adconline(m): 10:50am On May 07, 2010
because u dont want to be seen as failure in life
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by nalijah07(f): 4:48pm On May 07, 2010
@ Onchedu

wow "technical couple" shocked
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by IyaBasira: 5:04pm On May 07, 2010
harakiri:

[b]From my observation,this kind of crap happens mostly to guys who are 100% loyal,loving,caring and affectionate to their wives. Their wives know that no matter what happens,the man will never abandon them. . .so they take advantage. The woman's reply to the poster says it all (he is not going anywhere). Imagine that! Why is that women are always whining about not enough good men out there and when they find one,they treat him like crap? She has the balls to do this becoz she believes she has him tied down. If the guy was intolerant and ready to drop her like a hot potato at the slightest provocation,she wouldnt dare do what she is doing. [/b]These are one of the reasons why i'm not keen on marriage anytime soon. I dont need unecessary stress. Marriage sucks. . . BIG TIME.

Normally I avoid Harakiri's posts cos they reek of bitterness against marriage and women in general , but the bolded part of this post is ON POINT!!!! He nailed it. For her to have the audacity to say that "He is not going anywhere . . ." means that the beginning and end of this woman's problem is INGRATITUDE. Finish.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Nobody: 5:36pm On May 07, 2010
harakiri:

These are one of the reasons why i'm not keen on marriage anytime soon. I dont need unecessary stress. Marriage sucks. . . BIG TIME.

IyaBasira:

Normally I avoid Harakiri's posts cos they reek of bitterness against marriage and women in general .


ok!

i was about to comment on harakiri's post when i saw the second quote above.


God help the women who end up with some types of men!

gay marriage dey however.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by harakiri(m): 3:12am On May 08, 2010
IyaBasira:

Normally I avoid Harakiri's  posts cos they reek of bitterness against marriage and women in general , but the bolded part of this post is ON POINT!!!! He nailed it.  For her to have the audacity to say that "He is not going anywhere . . ." means that the beginning and end of this woman's problem is INGRATITUDE. Finish.


I cherish women.It's the crap they pull from time to time that puts me off!
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Amaka1725(f): 5:16am On May 08, 2010
harakiri:

I cherish women.It's the crap they pull from time to time that puts me off!



You know the same can be said about men. All the time they complain about not having good enough women out there and once they find one who is ready to love him for him. A realistic woman who doesn't have her head in the clouds then they take the piss!


OP
Your friend will get what she deserves soon enough
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by na2day2(m): 7:37am On May 08, 2010
nalijah07:

I have a friend who curses and disrespects her husband so badly. I have tried talking to her and she always just plays it down saying, "he is not going anywhere".

It looks like she is right, because whenever I see them out in public, they look so normal. All of this is done behind closed doors and often in front of the kids. I just wonder how he feels as a man to have this happen on a regular basis. shocked

i will first give her a deadly uppercut b4 dumping her sorry azz angry angry angry angry
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Nobody: 8:06am On May 08, 2010
and that's how people get themselves into trouble through busybody interference.

oyibo wey go give im husband slap or george bush wey don expert at dodging flying missiles- why cant these "experts at observing other people" go and lecture those ones.

i'm not condoning the woman but i wouldnt be surprised if the "concerned parties" wondering from afar, end up married to the guy after the "bad wife" is eliminated.

na today?
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by ElRazur: 8:08am On May 08, 2010
Madam Tpia

How are you today? grin
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Nobody: 8:17am On May 08, 2010
When he have had enough of the nonsense, he will stand up as a man.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by nalijah07(f): 1:32am On May 09, 2010
@ Tpia

It's just an observation, calm down
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Nobody: 3:15am On May 09, 2010
^^ the road to hell is paved with so-called "good intentions"

if i hadnt seen the situations i mentioned, personally, i'd be shouting the same as everyone else here.

let the husband handle his own business unless you have some reason for wanting to handle it for him.


not by force however!

but the way you presented your story is very revealing. Hope you and the husband arent already eyeing each other?
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by SkySpirit(m): 2:40pm On May 26, 2010
Blazay:

Not stupidity. They are married. Love conquers all, even if it takes ages.


The man is doing the right thing. One day, the lady will wake up and find him gone. It is a marriage with children involved. The man is looking at the bigger picture. Not every man wants to go chasing skirts and marrying more than one wife. You guys should keep educating her. She is only acting on what she knows. Which is poor upbringing and bad communication skills. Most women who never had fathers at home or had legitimately married parents in a cordial domestic environment usually act like this. Men too. It is all about behaviour modification. Some therapy might help too. Some kind of private counselling session with a pastor or a shrink.

U got it right. His silence is not a sign of weakness. He may actually be planning to marry another wife or even have one already, so that when he explodes he would not be caught napping. Please advise your friend to adjust because men are naturally vindictive.
Re: If Your Wife/Girlfriend Keeps Belittling You by Nobody: 9:01am On May 27, 2010
D guy is a big tym woosy. "We" will be history if my galfriend does that talk less of my wife. Y d hell will a "MAN" condone dt kind of crap? angry

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