My baby sister will be 26 in two weeks. Her marriage will be 4 yrs this month, but she has pregnancy issues. They have tried several means (medicals, prayers, and herbals etc) to solve the problem but all to no avail. She would cry and get depressed on many occassions and I always try to calm and tell her words of hope... Fastforward, the poor girl called me on phone this morning, crying, I was so scared. She told me her hubby said he's set to marry another wife,as he has always threatened, and he vowed nothing is gonna stop him this time. I felt so bad but I managed to consoled her and let us meet today after work. My people, what do you think I should do? I don't wanna interfere into her marriage but then she's my immediate younger sister, she's gone through alot already, what if somethin unpleasant happens to her as a result of depressn or even rivalry clash? Pls, experienced ones should advise.

She married the wrong one. My ex had fertility issues and inwas ready to marry her, what broe us up was other issues

She has visited several fertility clinic right ?

BrightForYou:
My baby sister will be 26 in two weeks. Her marriage will be 4 yrs this month, but unfortunately, she's sterile. They have tried several means (medicals, prayers, and herbals etc) to solve the problem but all to no avail. She would cry and get depressed on many occassions and I always try to calm and tell her words of hope... Fastforward, the poor girl called me on phone this morning, crying, I was so scared. She told me her hubby said he's set to marry another wife,as he has always threatened, and he vowed nothing is gonna stop him this time. I felt so bad but I managed to consoled her and let us meet today after work. My people, what do you think I should do? I don't wanna interfere into her marriage but then she's my immediate younger sister, she's gone through alot already, what if somethin unpleasant happens to her as a result of depressn or even rivalry clash? Pls, experienced ones should advise.

You are the number one factor she's yet to be pregnant!!! How can you call her sterile Call her sterile and thats what she is!
You and those around her need to work on positive words, thoughts and actions...

Sterile is a very strong word.

Femsyn:


You are the number one factor she's yet to be pregnant!!! How can you call her sterile Call her sterile and thats what she is!
You and those around her need to work on positive words, thoughts and actions...

Hey relax , though you raised a good point but you need to realize this is an emotional issue not an auto correct contest

lestat:
She married the wrong one. My ex had fertility issues and inwas ready to marry her, what broe us up was other issues

She has visited several fertility clinic right ?

Yes, she has been to different clinics for check-ups. Your first sentence hit me, because I have also thought about it, maybe she married the wrong one...

lestat:


Hey relax , though you raised a good point but you need to realize this is an emotional issue not an auto correct contest

Thank you for this input sir. He doesn't understand. He should have just corrected me, maybe I used a wrong word, and I will simply correct it.

lestat:


Hey relax , though you raised a good point but you need to realize this is an emotional issue not an auto correct contest

I see these issues everyday and around me. Don't tell me to relax! How dare him call his sister "Sterile"? She is not the first or the last to have sub-fertility issues. Things like this must be handled with care, unfortunately, this generation only stay in marriage when its rosy.

Maybe she had an abortion that prove fatal to her womb. Scold her, she will confess.

BrightForYou:


Yes, she has been to different clinic for check-ups. Your first sentence hit me, because I have also thought about it, maybe she married the wrong one...

Yes she did bro. When I first discovered my ex had fertility issues I was devastated but the thought of being without her just didn't seem logical .. so we started looking at adoption as an option after marriage

But like i said other issues ended the relationship

This is why it's important to marry that person who really sees us, despite our flaws and imperfections

She shouldn't despair relationships and marriages end all the time , the thing is for her to remember, it's not her fault.

She will move on and find the right one. What say she had a child then this same man tomorrow will raise hell saying she can't give birth to a second child ?

Or if she had a girl he will do same claiming he wants a son?

She should thank the Lord this is happening now, I am not saying it's going to be easy, she will be brokem if it comes to a divorce but she will move on, she will pick up the pieces and smile again

Femsyn:


I see this issues everyday and around me. Don't tell me to relax! How dare him call his sister "Sterile"? She is not the first or the last to have sub-fertility issues. Things like this must be handled with care, unfortunately, this generation only stay in marriage when its rosy.

You really are angry this morning aren't you?

This isn't how to handle such issues where emotions are involved

WHAT IF HER HUSBAND IS IMPOTENT?

I hope someone is not there fueling the husband. I guess your sister lack the support of her inlaw if not 4 years is still young to be thinking of getting another woman.

GOD that answer SARAH will surely hear her cry.

Not angry. Just pained, cos i went through something similar with my wife, though not up to 4years, and i understand the trauma that goes with it. Experienced it? Yes i have. If he understands what i mean, i expect him to have changed that evil word already!

Update:
Thanks OP.

lestat:


Yes she did bro. When I first discovered my ex had fertility issues I was devastated but the thought of being without her just didn't seem logical .. so we started looking at adoption as an option after marriage

But like insaod other issues ended the relationship

This is why it's important to marry that person who really sees us, despite our flaws and imperfections

She shouldn't despaire relationships and marriages end all the time , the thing is for her to remember, it's not her fault.

She will move on and find the right one. What say she had a child then this same man tomorrow will raise hell saying she can't give birth to a second child ?

Or if she had a girl he will do same claiming he wants a son?

She should thank the Lord this is happening now, I am not saying it's going 5o be easy, she will be brokem if it comes to a divorce but she will move on, she will pick up the pieces and smile again

Thanks so much. I told her some of these things whenever I'm consoling her, just that I can't tell her to divorce, i have to apply wisdom in dealing with the issue.

GloriaNinja:
WHAT IF HER HUSBAND IS IMPOTENT?

He has two children already,from his ex- wife.

BrightForYou:


Thanks so much. I told her some of these things whenever I'm consoling her, just that I can't tell her to divorce, i have to apply wisdom in dealing with the issue.

No she shouldn't ask for it, she should just be prepared.

But if his attitude gets so negative to the point she gets depressed she should leave !

No marriage is worth her life, life is a journey not a destination.

No one had the right to break another down to the point of depression, this shalt not kill doesn't just mean physical murder

madridguy:
I hope someone is not there fueling the husband. I guess your sister lack the support of her inlaw if not 4 years is still young to be thinking of getting another woman.

GOD that answer SARAH will surely hear her cry.

Brother, may God multiply your wisdom. Your first and second points are absolutely right. And Amen to the prayers. Thanks.

@topic,
It is clear the man doesnt care because he has two children already. Unfortunately for him, the fact that he has two children does not mean he cant develop fertility issues along the way, or perhaps, the children are not even his! My point is, the man needs to get himself tested too. We are so quick to put the blame on the woman. What your sister needs now is support, especially from her husband. There's little you can do.

Infertility does not necessarily mean the couple has been promiscuous in the past. What they need is to forge an alliance as one big family and attack what wants to destroy their home.

The husband needs to accept this challenge and i'm certain they will laugh in the end, like i did!

lestat:


No she shouldn't ask for it, she should just be prepared.

But if his attitude gets so negative to the point she gets depressed she should leave !

No marriage is worth her life, life is a journey not a destination.

No one had the right to break another down to the point of depression, this shalt not kill doesn't just mean physical murder

Yes,I told her this morning that if something goes wrong with her, the man would live his life, thus he does not worth her death, tears and depression. Thanks so much.

If this is the case, I would suggest anyone " elders " from your side too to move into action. Let them have a round table discussion with the husband and his people too.

BrightForYou:


Brother, may God multiply your wisdom. Your first and second points are absolutely right. And Amen to the prayers. Thanks.

BrightForYou:


Yes,I told her this morning that if something goes wrong with her, the man would live his life, thus he does not worth her death, tears and depression. Thanks so much.

You welcome.bro extend my sincere well.wishes to her

Will keep her in my prayers

May God Almighty hear her cries and answer her prayers.

No one knows what the root of the problem is, but I can imagine she's going through a whole lot right now.

The best she can do is continue praying and bracing herself for the bad (divorce).

All I know is that she's still young at 26 and the God of Sarah will hear her prayers soon with this man or a new husband.

Femsyn:
@topic,
It is clear the man doesnt care because he has two children already. Unfortunately for him, the fact that he has two children does not mean he cant develop fertility issues along the way, or perhaps, the children are not even his! My point is, the man needs to get himself tested too. We are so quick to put the blame on the woman. What your sister needs now is support, especially from her husband. There's little you can do.

Infertility does not necessarily mean the couple has been promiscuous in the past. What they need is to forge an alliance as one big family and attack what wants to destroy their home.

The husband needs to accept this challenge and i'm certain they will laugh in the end, like i did!

Thanks sir. He's not ready to co-operate, like I said in the first post, he threatened no one can stop him, because that's what his Alfas, Pastors or whatever told him to do, that until he gets another wife, my sister(in his own mind not our portion) will never have babies. Hmm, I laugh in Spanish.

madridguy:
If this is the case, I would suggest anyone " elders " from your side too to move into action. Let them have a round table discussion with the husband and his people too.

Well, I pray it works out again this time around. Note the word "again". Thanks so much.

lestat:

You welcome.bro extend my sincere well.wishes to her
Will keep her in my prayers

Thanks sir. God bless.

Nigga44:
May God Almighty hear her cries and answer her prayers.

No one knows what the root of the problem is, but I can imagine she's going through a whole lot right now.

The best she can do is continue praying and bracing herself for the bad (divorce).

All I know is that she's still young at 26 and the God of Sarah will hear her prayers soon with this man or a new husband.

Amen. You've said it all. Thank you.

Word " again " noted.

BrightForYou:


Well, I pray it works out again this time around. Note the word "again". Thanks so much.

Remimadrid:
Maybe she had an abortion that prove fatal to her womb. Scold her, she will confess.

Oh! Ok, thanks.

Femsyn:
Not angry. Just pained, cos i went through something similar with my wife, though not up to 4years, and i understand the trauma that goes with it. Experienced it? Yes i have. If he understands what i mean, i expect him to have changed that evil word already!

Update:
Thanks OP.

I didn't see it that way, I want the best for her and that's why I'm here seeking solutions. I might have used a wrong word, but i consider it "error" not "evil" as you stated. Thanks.

Where is the for better or for worse crew calling out the husband?

Mindfulness:
Where is the for better or for worse crew calling out the husband?

They've all gone mute

I caught one of them btw...

BrightForYou:


He has two children already,from his ex- wife.

So ?

Still needs to check his sperm count , quality of sperm too
This is the issue with some uneducated men.... they think it’s always the woman’s fault .. they will never go and check if they also have the issue
Drinking, smoking, wearing tight boxers , drugs you take all sort can make a man have low sperm count which would make it difficukg for the lady in question to conceive

Also once they check all that out and neither have no issues she may just need her womb tightened or an IVF procedure ...