Cheating or infidelity as the case may be in marriages is a pandemic problem. There is no country in the world, where married men and women do not cheat. However, statistics may alarmingly vary from one country to another, but no country is adultery free.

I have no doubt that even in the Vatican City, (purely a theocratic state) where more emphasis is given to morality; there must be one or two cases of adultery or cheat in marriages – though the media may not report them like other countries.

Scientists and psychologists, in their several attempts to demystify why men and women cheat in marriages, have given some useful explanations but not adequate. Their explanations did not solve the problem, rather it only aggravated it. Which is partly why the rate at which married men and women now cheat, is alarming. Consequently, contributing to the many reasons why husbands and wives divorce.

Hence, this article intends to explain the unorthodox reasons why men and women cheat in marriages. I have used unorthodox because they are not inspired by scientific research or psychological observation, neither are they found in popular culture books. Hopefully, the solutions given at the end will help those who are about to lose their marriages to infidelity.

The fear of God is missing

Show me a marriage that is ridden with infidelity and I will prove to you that it lacks the fear of God. Not just marriages, wherever the fear of God is missing or is not treasured like gold, people cast off restraint. The fear of God is so powerful that it gives wisdom in everything done. It is also so important that it guides conscience, regulates behaviour, and moderates the relationship between people, including the covenant relationships between husbands and wives.

Despite the conspicuous value of the fear of God, most people including married men and women do not have it. That is why they misbehave, abuse, and cheat one another. For instance, it is not possible for a husband or wife who truly has the fear of God to cheat in his/her marriage. I know of a man called Joseph in the Bible. When he was confronted by Potiphar’s wife to do that, which was not convenient for him, he said, “How then can I do such a wicked thing and sin against God.” If Mr Joseph did not have the fear of God, he would have thrown in the towel.

On the contrary, some men and women also lived four thousand years ago in Sodom and Gomorrah. These men had no fear of God and because of this; they did worse than infidelity, to the extent that, God had to obliterate them.

Putting these examples into contextual consideration, there is no doubt that when the fear of God is missing in marriages, cheating will become inevitable.

They do not know what they need

Married men and women who cheat in their marriages do not know what they need. It is very important that before men and women embark on the lifelong journey of marriage, they must know what they need, go for it, and stay with it. It is written, ”Rejoice in the wife of your youth”. That is why it is very important not to marry under pressure or marry without seeking God’s counsel. In the process, one’s decision may be based on want and not need. And if one marries what he does not need, give it time, infidelity will be the first consoling option. Sadly, many marriages are products of yielding to pressures or not following the mind of God.

Lack of self-control

In a bid to have a balanced opinion, I have chosen to add this. Worthy of note, there are some married men and women whose pre-marital choices were based on needs but still cheat in their marriages. Reason being that, they lack self-control.

It is a terrible thing not to have control over one’s body before or when married. Anyone that cannot control his body is vulnerable https://qwenu.com/2018/12/20/the-unorthodox-reasons-why-married-men-and-women-cheat-in-their-marriages/

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