lonelygem:


What was your motivation for dating her at the beginning bro?

I want to assume the relationship involved sex and now, 18 against 30. Can you swear that you were not having this plans of calling it quit with her?

You are creating an impression of being a good guy after taken advantage of the poor girl.

If you heard this done to your younger sister, how would u feel? Would your mind pray for such guy or otherwise?

If you are good at structuring your stories, know that some others are good at listening..

I'd rather hurt you with truth than console you with lies..

No offense meant bro.

funmisticqueen:
in essence you want him to put someone else's daughter to subjugation and poverty so you can claim man of the house.

Op, there is no pressure to marry, if you are complaining about bills then you are not as financially. stable as you would have us believe. Sending her to school is something you ought to do because you want to with no strings attached, not because you want to marry her, if you marry her now, she won't have enough experiences to upgrade her life, she will always be your shadow. But then that is what you want.

If you can't wait for her to mature a little, then you don't really love her at all. let her choose you, don't pressurize her

Yewandequeen:
If only the girl in question knows how many people are deliberating on her matter

My take on this is that Op doesn't have to marry her yet just cos he wants security of sending her to school. Are there not people that offer such out of free will?

Send her to school, first 2yrs will determine what her future will be. Hopefully she doesn't fall pregnant for another man.
The first 2yrs will kindda expose her, gain some. Mental development and give you insight to what she might become when she is older. So send her to school and watch her for the next 2yrs if things are still lovely Btw you two by then, go ahead and marry her.

Don't tie her down with marriage. She might agree to be cool with it all these this year just cos of her situation and next yr things change and u will see a different her entirely. Don't be in haste to marry her just to secure her, she might turn out to be ur worst nightmare.
When you are poor you exhibit another person character but when ure rich your own character will surface.

Polchiz:

Another old cargo. They hate seeing younger girls get married out of the fear that if the pattern is followed by other men their own chance getting married becomes very slim.

Polchiz:

STOP this your yeye lecture. The ability to handle challenges is not naturally conferred on you as you get older. It is all about experience.
A 25-year old girl may start crying and sucking just because her husband travelled and NEPA has come with their bill while an 18-year old girl with proper upbringing and training can handle the challenge.
Additionally, University does not teach you marriage. Therefore, a PhD will not guarantee successful marriage. You will only be blowing big grammar and arguing with your husband on everything.

mastermaestro:


You don't have to persuade anybody. It is the old single 'girls' that engage in endless wailing about age when they see young girls getting married. They are suffering from jealousy and lack of marital opportunities.

Babamide:
Bros, marriage should be between two matured people. I'm pretty sure you are after the girl because she is still innocent and you feel you can control her. Educating someone does not give you the right to marry her. Let her be. Look for someone older with whom you can build together.

ibkayee:

An 18 year old dating a 30 year old is different to a 26 year old dating a 38 year old

Key difference is mental development and experiences. I won’t call him a pervert per se, she’s technically an adult, but if you heard your 18 year old sister was dating a 30 year old man most people would do a double take

Deepfeel:

Haba so a lady of 23, 24, 25 is not ripe for marriage?

fascia:
This is somehow tricky.
Though maturity differs but I think she's still young, she definitely doesn't know what she want. Let her experience life small before she is tied down with marriage. Let her explore on her own at lest you did too.. So she won't regret loosing her youth to marriage.

Concerning education, any contribution you make there should be considered a donation or investment In a person you care about, love as u said.this should be done with no aim of getting anything back, even marriage. Don't make it a blackail or bondage for her. Let her know you see in a her a future partner and u love her and it her decision to marry you or not... Let her choose u it's easier that way. You can pay for her first 2 years in school, preferably pay part and let her parents do the rest,afterall she's their child.

Consider the 2 years a courtship/dating...it will shed more light on if you love each other/compactibility.at the end of the 2nd year ,you can both decide if you want to marry each other, you that claim to love her now might think differently later.
Use the 2 years to develop yourself more financially,you would be surprise what you can do with proper motivation.

Lastly I understand time is not a commodity you can afford but anything worthwhile take time, effort and hardworking. It's marriage it has to be done well.
My 2 cent

KevinDein:
LMAO

This thread has really riled a lot of the females. Even those that open threads and support prostitution feel a 30 year old man marrying a soon to be 19 year old is the greatest crime of century.

@op and other men, marry any lady you love as long as they are above 18. Most of the women whinging about the age difference are supporters of much more immoral lifestyles; visit the family section to see for yourselves. Don't take their words seriously.

ngwababe:
.

They are ripe for marriage.

desthan:
Can't you assist her if God has blessed you, and leave marraige out of it.

ITbomb:

Not everyone loves old cargoes, some people love their wife to grow with them

chiboy1116:
yea , lol, i wouldn't take that from my 18 year old daughter at all , but seems like her parents are okay with it , it's not wrong legally though.



I doesnt make sense to me though , but according to him the girl loves him and the parents are aware of this .

Phlakes:
Will you be able to cope with her psychologically, you can't compare ur maturity with hers, so expect some childish behavior

HitSong:

Lol
Liar!
You're 30 or 31 already and that girl is just 18.
Will you be so much in LUST with her if the girl has had sex with at least 3 people before in the past!?
Age doesn't, that's why my cousin gave birth to triplet at the age of 3
If you've had sex with that girl or you did later and you eventually dump her, God will punish you.
Oniranu

mastermaestro:


You don't have to persuade anybody. It is the old single 'girls' that engage in endless wailing about age when they see young girls getting married. They are suffering from jealousy and lack of marital opportunities.

Polchiz:
Another old cargo

GT07115:
Hi peeps, I am in love with an 18 years old lady who is from a very poor background as mine, I will be 30 this year and I intend settling down maritally this year or early next year, I would have loved her to gain admission before doing anything marriage with her.

I have discussed going back to school with her and getting a trade along, by her consent toit I have gave her money to enroll for jamb and NECO exam which will make her secure admission this year, the jamb result is out and OK pending NECO exam which will start next week.

My problem is the parent are financially handicapped to contribute a dime to her education and we are not married that means the whole stuff is on my head, I would have loved to marry this year if she was already in school or a graduate, I am the first son with responsibility of putting my younger ones through school. I feel I will be shouldering a lot of responsibility, the relationship is just one way sided and the parents don't give a breathing space whenever she spends some hours late in my house, like reminding me we are not married, the whole thing is that I love her, she is a lady I can talk to, and very young and beautiful.

Yewandequeen:
If only the girl in question knows how many people are deliberating on her matter

My take on this is that Op doesn't have to marry her yet just cos he wants security of sending her to school. Are there not people that offer such out of free will?

SageMK:


Tread carefully. A lot of guys have taken this path only to see it backfire. I am not against you sponsoring her bills but don't be surprise to see her leave for another guy.

So I suggest you marry her first, establish a trade for her and then put her through school. But if you can't do this then let her go. Don't tie yourself down to a burden. This man is selfish from his point of view..you want to marry her but she is poor...those in love believes in what they can make you to become not in what you are..you must be a sex predator .



You shouldn't even be complaining about this. You don't get to earn their trust simply because you are financially stable. Sex predators come in different from. Her parent shouldn't even allow her to visit you in the first place.

BananaTree:

funmisticqueen: :
in essence you want him to put someone else's daughter to subjugation and poverty so you can claim man of the house.

Op, there is no pressure to marry, if you are complaining about bills then you are not as financially. stable as you would have us believe. Sending her to school is something you ought to do because you want to with no strings attached, not because you want to marry her, if you marry her now, she won't have enough experiences to upgrade her life, she will always be your shadow. But then that is what you want.

If you can't wait for her to mature a little, then you don't really love her at all. let her choose you, don't pressurize her

You're simply not being honest or practical. There is no free lunch anywhere. It's either someone is paying directly or indirectly. Selfishness is engrained in the nature of man. No one does anything for God, though, they may not admit it like you may eventually do after reading this but on critical evaluation, there is always more.

ibkayee:

It’s not wrong legally, it’s just weird.

Plus we’ve heard this same story all too many times before.

Pensioner Mature man about to leave bachelor life or is ready settle down looks for a young, poor naive pretty virgin in the village to raise take as his wife

Since they’re poor the parents and girl will look to him as their chance ‘out’ and go along with it, most people in their situation would. Lol the girl has a lot of years and experience ahead of her though so her eye will clear soon enough and watch her be swept away by a better candidate once she’s been ‘cleaned’ up

Best of luck to all of them