Why do babes dump their girl friends when they find love? What exactly goes through their heads? Amongst my circle of friends i would say am the realist amongst them. Am very blunt and i just say things the way they are. Am pretty straight forward. When they have problems they always seem to be knbocking at my door and when its sorted am the last to know. I feel used you know. Let me give you guys a typical example. My friend was having a whole lot of emotional problems etc she even slept with my boyfriend (obviously an EX now) i forgave her because we are humans. We sorted her problem bit by bit and she got better. The next phase is academic problems. With Prayers and fasting and serious words of encouragements she scales through that. She came back for her graduation and I was not invited. Good, maybe she forgot. Now she meets a guy, they are dating and she is planning a wedding, i get to hear from a third party. People!!!! where did i go wrong?

Another case is a dear friend who gets married and all of a sudden her single friends are not good enough. Inshort a lot of babes do this and i always wonder why? people say i should wait and see, that when i get married i would probably do the same. I doubt it though because i take my friendships seriously. A True friend is worth 100 romantic relationships. I think married or single we all need our friends. They have roles they play too in our lives. For one, if you are a very romantic wife and your husband is hardly around who keeps you comapany and keeps your mind SANE/from GUYS??"its your not so good female friends"and many more i cannot begin to mention. Some say their husbands stops them from enjoying the company of their female friends where does he get off?? such husbands am sorry to say are not confident men.

People, what are your opinions? am i the bad guy here or what?

i didnt read allot dat but sum friend do deserve to be dump freind always leave prints in ur heart its either gonna b a gud one or bad ones

but just to say i will never choose a guy over my friend i belive friends r forever

dont u that love is blind.
it is because love is found.

she is afraid her hubby get to know her past through you

So the faster she run away from you the better for her

That why guys will always say BABES FOR A WHILE NIGGAS FOR LIFE
This is because unlike girl they value their friends more. How i wish girls will learn that too.

it depends on the type of friend. if he/she is very important to you, you can make your guy understand but if it's just one of those friends, just leave them cos i'm sure they'll do the same if they were in your shoes. friends full everywhere and soon u'll get another one  

do i smell jealously or plain unforgiveness. there r tyms dat pple drift apart frm old frnds not jus cos they think they r not gud enuff circumstances cause them to. if u trully her her frnd u will undastd dat and if she does not tell u abt she gettin married well dont u think its her loss. we ladies shld learn that there r some situations dat we carry out actions n we unintentionally hurt others that does make us less it jus makes us human.

pls if ur frnds 4get u afta gettin married or wen they ve boyfrnds then its their loss not urs

do i smell jealously or plain unforgiveness. there r tyms dat pple drift apart frm old frnds not jus cos they think they r not gud enuff circumstances cause them to. if u trully her her frnd u will undastd dat and if she does not tell u abt she gettin married well dont u think its her loss. we ladies shld learn that there r some situations dat we carry out actions n we unintentionally hurt others that does make us less it jus makes us human.

pls if ur frnds 4get u afta gettin married or wen they ve boyfrnds then its their loss not urs

What i know is that Any how Any how, You will need to introduce you friend to your boy friend or gf. cheer

You are quite right. I dont know exactly why they do this but i think i am also in your shoes. I dont know if my friend has found her love but this friend has been behaving somehow to some of us(friends), I dont know the actual problem but i think you are right in some aspects.

@ topic
Dear you don't have to be sad, like arikky said its her (their) loss. And in as much as it hurts, or you didn't see it coming there is a saying that in life, we loose some and we gain some

Some girls can be very insecure which can be one possible reason. "What if you got close to her boyfriend and . . ?", remember she did the same to you, so she has to have it at the back of her mind that the same might be coming her way. For some girls, the "prevention is better than cure" policy works best for them!!!

Some girls on the other hand loose focus, not intentionally but because they get carried away. They just found new love, and my gosh every other person on earth could varnish for all they care. You just have to excuse them. Yea we do say "we'll not let anything come between our friendship", but somethings are easier said than done

Some girls, friendship with them should just be called "charity work" Cos its like you were just sent into their lives to help them through the bad times and be forgotten during the good times. There's little or nothing you can do about it, they just don't value you the same way you value them. Like Arikka said, we are human and capable of forgetting and doing mistakes, but forgetting you both during graduation and marriage to me ooh has another definition of friendship marked on it

And then there is getting married when your good good friend is still single, darling very few of this case remain the same . . why?? you may ask. Well more or less, your "worlds" change. Its no longer the same because you now have different aspects of life to cover. You might find out that your agenda no longer match, and even if you tried you find very little to share in common

I had this friend, infact she was my best friend when i got home from school in naija, she's a year older than myself but we were TIGHT, real close. She gets married and what happened?, no matter how we try to hold unto the relationship that once was, its more or less ia lost battle.
Now when i call her on phone my mum bursts our lauging because its only a "greeting call" of how are you? I'm fine!, how are you? i'm fine! how are your kids and husband? they're fine? but how are you? i'm fine? and that continues for the next 2mins, til we say "we'll talk later"

Its real difficult to hold unto friendship when one has moved upward, you sort of get into a new society and new bunch of friends that fit more into your own category of life!! A few make it afterwards, but only a few. Its just life, its unfair, yea, but we hust have to live with it.

@ poster
Forget it dear. I'm sure life has better friends in stock for you. Thats just how it works, you loose some, and you have new ones come your way. Where and when you'll meet your life-time-no-matter-what-circumstances friend(s) is yet to be told, but don't give up. It happens to the best of us

arikky:

do i smell jealously or plain unforgiveness.

I just got a bit startled with this very part of your post Cos i'm not sure what there is to be jealous of. She didnt say she was hurt because her friend got a lover but because she cut her out of her life without notice

Unforgiveness?? what has that got to do with the matter. She already forgave her for sleeping with her guy, what could she do to her that would be worse than that??

simple. these girl u mentioned where never your friends!!!!!!!

.

Well, i think friends will always be friend but it depends on where u place them when u get married. Some friends might want to interfere with your marital life like ill advising you on issues based on their singles point of view which does not align with your married status. I love my friends but I think I will draw a line when I get married-its not as if I will cut off all my dealings with them, its just that I will be more careful cos my husband takes first priority for now.

It will be hard for them to accept but that is how it should be.

@Cute-ass,

Just want to say thanks for your comment. Really well thought of. Its her loss like you guys said. Thanks also for putting ARIKKY straight at least you saved me the trouble. Dunno where she got hers from. Been reading your other comments on other threads and i think you are a very smart girl. Do keep it up. Thanks mate!!!!

bebe2007:

@Cute-ass,

Just want to say thanks for your comment. Really well thought of. Its her loss like you guys said. Thanks also for putting ARIKKY straight at least you saved me the trouble. Dunno where she got hers from. Been reading your other comments on other threads and i think you are a very smart girl. Do keep it up. Thanks mate!!!!

Thanks for the compliment dearie, very well appreciated. Just keep cool, your story is yet to be told

bebe,

why do you want your married friends to still have your own friendship above their spouse's. eh?

Spouses are supposed to be each other's best friends.

Pray to God to give you a husband who will also be your best friend.


chikena!!!!

it  depends, bt onetin is d type of friends u r, wat do u discuss as friends, wat u do as friends. whn  friendship is built on lust, tru lov wll prvail it, bt whn  friends wth positive objective i;e 2 say, they hv plans 4 d future; hw 2 make gud homes, gud husband etc. no lov can stop it. when u engaged indiscussing hw 2 play d fast ones over guys wth ur friends, whn she found smbody dat she lovs, she wll avoid u. whn u said u found solutions 2 ur friends problem, d question is, wat kind of problem d found d solution?.

dats just BS straight up!

God gave us our relatives, thank God we can choose our friends!
True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost
if a girl ditches her friend for a lover, then she's not a true friend
and d guy she claims she loves can end up dumping her, who will she cry to? her friends!!!
but she ditched dem already, but good friends will always take her back!

he'll knows I won't ditch my friends for some guy!