For a woman, choosing the right man is not the same as choosing the perfect man. Yes! We just say we have found the perfect man, but deep down, it's just the right man that fits our situational world-view.
For a Lady, choosing a man is like going through a sack of beans to find that single grain; a golden-untainted, light-heavy bean that the hands of your heart can accept. It's really a hard choice to make even with constant prayers. These choices requires a huge chunk of luck
At my church where I have been an usher for the past 4years, I have watched women get married with all smiles and whatsapp status describing their men as a perfection of everything. Yet, the inbox messages is totally different as water is to wind. They will complain over every single thing.
Months or two to three years after being married, these couples fall out and are hard to pull together by their god-parent. It would even be worse if babies aren't forth coming.
Nowadays, as a lady, you look through your whatsapp and every where is filled to the brim with messages. You don't know which is geniun and which is a joker. God knows I have even ignored my Facebook inbox. As a lady you realize things isn't as easy as society paints it. It's harder for a woman to chose than it's easy for a man to pick.

Yours truly . 7thlemonlover

From the bolded, you backed your getting a nice man on luck! Best of luck sister

amaham:
From the bolded, you backed your getting a nice man on luck! Best of luck sister

that's the obvious truth people shay away from

@ op, for a responsible man, it's actually more difficult finding the right person because he is majorly responsible for his actions especially if he intends to stay in the marriage without cheating.

Because there is no perfect human beings anywhere there is no perfect marriage anywhere. Working marriages are just two people who decide to be realistic in their expectations and are committed to making it work.

My dear, if you define 'luck' as preparation meeting opportunity then you are right. But the question is , how many people truly prepare for the institution of marriage? What we see these days is two people start having sex and the lady gets pregnant and the next thing is a rushed wedding ceremony.

Singles do not read, listen to tapes of watch videos that will give them information on how to make marriage work. On one side they will rather stay on Instagram and Facebook achieving nothing. On the other side they will keep praying and and dashing from one vigil to another.

Marriage is the truest test of anyone's character. And it takes commitment and maturity to make it work. Sadly these are not virtues that are extolled today. Even in churches. So men (and I dare say women) who have no good intentions find their way to lure the naive.

Just as you see all manner of adverts on television advertising different products and you choose which one you need, you will always see numerous inbox messages. This is not abnormal.

What you need to do is set your minimum ground rules of deal breakers such as faith, age, education etc (whichever is important to you). This will weed out a good chunk. Then you can begin to look at character flews that you can or can't live with. Also you need a father figure (not necessarily your father) or a male you can trust his judgement to help out. The reason is that there are always blind spots in relationships and you need a trusted eye to see it.

Lastly, there is the God factor, because of our imperfect nature, we need the one with a perfect mind to help you and give the wisdom when the rubber meets the road.

Believe me marriage can be one of the best things that can happen to one. I am a living witness.

yemisolar:
@ op, for a responsible man, it's actually more difficult finding the right person because he is majorly responsible for his actions especially if he intends to stay in the marriage without cheating.

Because there is no perfect human beings anywhere there is no perfect marriage anywhere. Working marriages are just two people who decide to be realistic in their expectations and are committed to making it work.

My dear, if you define 'luck' as preparation meeting opportunity then you are right. But the question is , how many people truly prepare for the institution of marriage? What we see these days is two people start having sex and the lady gets pregnant and the next thing is a rushed wedding ceremony.

Singles do not read, listen to tapes of watch videos that will give them information on how to make marriage work. On one side they will rather stay on Instagram and Facebook achieving nothing. On the other side they will keep praying and and dashing from one vigil to another.

Marriage is the truest test of anyone's character. And it takes commitment and maturity to make it work. Sadly these are not virtues that are extolled today. Even in churches. So men (and I dare say women) who have no good intentions find their way to lure the naive.

Just as you see all manner of adverts on television advertising different products and you choose which one you need, you will always see numerous inbox messages. This is not abnormal.

What you need to do is set your minimum ground rules of deal breakers such as faith, age, education etc (whichever is important to you). This will weed out a good chunk. Then you can begin to look at character flews that you can or can't live with. Also you need a father figure (not necessarily your father) or a male you can trust his judgement to help out. The reason is that there are always blind spots in relationships and you need a trusted eye to see it.

Lastly, there is the God factor, because of our imperfect nature, we need the one with a perfect mind to help you and give the wisdom when the rubber meets the road.

Believe me marriage can be one of the best things that can happen to one. I am a living witness.

This is a fantastic write up...well done!

yemisolar:
@ Believe me marriage can be one of the best things that can happen to one. I am a living witness.

I agree with you. Marriage is beautiful. Thanks

yemisolar:
@ op, for a responsible man, it's actually more difficult finding the right person because he is majorly responsible for his actions especially if he intends to stay in the marriage without cheating.

Because there is no perfect human beings anywhere there is no perfect marriage anywhere. Working marriages are just two people who decide to be realistic in their expectations and are committed to making it work.

My dear, if you define 'luck' as preparation meeting opportunity then you are right. But the question is , how many people truly prepare for the institution of marriage? What we see these days is two people start having sex and the lady gets pregnant and the next thing is a rushed wedding ceremony.

Singles do not read, listen to tapes of watch videos that will give them information on how to make marriage work. On one side they will rather stay on Instagram and Facebook achieving nothing. On the other side they will keep praying and and dashing from one vigil to another.

Marriage is the truest test of anyone's character. And it takes commitment and maturity to make it work. Sadly these are not virtues that are extolled today. Even in churches. So men (and I dare say women) who have no good intentions find their way to lure the naive.

Just as you see all manner of adverts on television advertising different products and you choose which one you need, you will always see numerous inbox messages. This is not abnormal.

What you need to do is set your minimum ground rules of deal breakers such as faith, age, education etc (whichever is important to you). This will weed out a good chunk. Then you can begin to look at character flews that you can or can't live with. Also you need a father figure (not necessarily your father) or a male you can trust his judgement to help out. The reason is that there are always blind spots in relationships and you need a trusted eye to see it.

Lastly, there is the God factor, because of our imperfect nature, we need the one with a perfect mind to help you and give the wisdom when the rubber meets the road.

Believe me marriage can be one of the best things that can happen to one. I am a living witness.

Nice write up.