Is it nice to get along with my ex?

Being friends with your ex is the act of establishing a connection with them or going back to be with them in the hope that the relationship will be better than the previous one. Should I be friends with my ex? To some extent, I will say yes, if you know you would be able to manage it properly so it doesn’t affect your recent relationship.

And I will also say no if you know your new partner won’t be okay with it. This is definitely an individual’s choice whether to be friends with an ex or not. However, there are some guidelines all exes should adhere to after a breakup. In most relationships, some partners will find it difficult to forget about the good times once shared together while others would rather move on and never look back.

When should I cut ties with my ex?

Why want to establish a friendship with your ex after seeing that your relationship with them was filled with cheating and abusive words? Notwithstanding, even if your relationship was completely healthy and didn’t work out as expected, you might want to have a second thought before accepting to be friends again.

A 2000 study discovered that friendships between exes were more likely to experience bad qualities, and less likely to have good ones, than cross-sex platonic friendships. This would have appeared completely true if you were never friends before you dated. I love a question being answered by Rachel Sussman, a psychotherapist based in New York City; she says chemistry hardly changes that if you had a really strong bond and a really strong love affair with a very interesting lovemaking life, how do you become friends with that individual?

A study also shows that being friends with your ex has several dangers ahead as it sometimes holds you back from going into a new relationship. It will really appear insane informing your new partner that your ex is one of your closest friends. How do you expect your new partner to address you and do you think the new relationship will really flourish having done all this?

Here is a practical life challenge experienced by one of my friends:

My friend by name, Gideon Akpan in his early 20s experiences similar thing as after breaking up with his girlfriend for about a year, Akpan stayed friends with her and had soft spots for her hoping the relationship would be better than their previous relationship with mistakes well learned and checked appropriately.

Having been into a romantic relationship on and off and back into friendship with his ex for a complete five years and a half, that the relationship was enjoyable but he stills make the same mistake again. Akpan says he can’t advise any of his friends or loved ones to fall back on being friends with their exes and he made up his mind never to go back to his ex again no matter what.

Akpan also says that continuously falling back on friendship allowed him unable to feel some of the pain of each breakup which may appear a good strategy, but can impede future growth immensely.

Similarly, a study published in PLOS One in 2013, shows that “breakup distress may work as a catalyst for personal growth,” while refraining from this distress may prevent the development process.

Here are a few times your partner shouldn’t be friends with their ex:

Your partner doesn’t include you

You may not want to be clingy and may accord your significant other the privilege to have some communication with his or her friends/exes. But if you perceived something fishy is going on behind your back, and it is better you rebuke your partner and warn him or her about the dangers ahead.

We have seen instances where some partners tend to cheat on their current partner by being friends with their exes. Have in mind that even if a partner break-ups and one or both find other partners, either your partner or their ex may still want to see each other if the relationship was very sexual and the chemistry between them was really strong.

Never die in silence but rather speak up if you feel uncomfortable or worried that everything isn’t fine in the relationship. In some cases, this type of friendship isn’t healthy, especially if your significant other has a history of cheating.

friends with your ex
The ex wants to be back with your partner

If you have the feeling that the ex wants to get back together with your partner, even if your partner has no interest in his or her ex, being friends with the ex isn’t healthy. Also, if your significant other has moved on, but the ex hasn’t, then I don’t advise being as friends.

Your partner’s ex isn’t happy for you

You discovered that your partner’s ex isn’t happy about your current relationship and you do observe they said mean things about you. Never allow your partner to be friends with the ex as the relationship may not be enjoyable as it were before. If you discover the ex says rude comment or makes inappropriate gestures when you both are together or passing by, it is better to ask your partner what his or her intentions are, pertaining to the ex.

Why are their friends in the first place? After seeing and hearing all the negative things the ex says about them? If your significant other actually loves you, he or she would cut ties completely with the ex to save your relationship.

Their ex finds it hard letting go or moving on

You sensed that the ex is having a hard time letting go or moving on and he or she is trying to remain friends with your partner. Be careful and never support such a friendship as the ex might be possibly having hope of getting back with your partner and you may be displaced.

Also, if your partner does receive phone calls and romantic text messages regularly from their ex, be watchful as they have no reason to contact your partner. You can make it clear to your partner that you don’t like him/her entertaining such romantic text messages or calls from their ex and they should cut ties with the ex completely.

Read more at https://relhealth.com/friends-with-your-ex-best-tips-by-experts-whether-you-can/

Oga this your story too long

There's no problem keeping in contact, as long as you both understand your boundaries and don't compromise the relationship with your new partners.