Anti Marlian ideo by Ucheka Akanimo Text written by Miakpo Emiaso
MARLIANS DONT WEAR PANTS I stumbled on to Ucheka Akanimo’s video now generally referred to as the Anti-Marlian Video by chance on a Whatsapp platform. I didn’t need to watch it twice before I got pulled into it and the message which its content illuminates. That message is a message which agrees and coincides with the kind of message I have been spreading among youths over the yers at different fora where I have been invited to give lectures to youths. The first of such lectures was in 2013. It was a lecture entitled “Responsibility as a Prerequisite of Leadership” delivered to members of the Nigeria Federation of Catholic Students of the Delta State School of Health Technology, Ofuoma. The second was one delivered on the 27th of August 2017 to the Catholic Youth Organisation of the Warri Diocese entitled “Repositioning the Catholic Youth for Effective Leadership” while the third entitled “Laying a Solid Foundation for a Prosperous Future” took place on the 2nd of April 2018 to Catholic Youths of the Warri Diocese as part of the Justice Development and Peace Commission’s (JDPC) Easter Youth Seminar.. In all three lectures, I spoke about the need for our youth to do things differently and rightly. For the purpose of this brief write up I shall here reproduce verbatim part of what I told the youths in 2013. It represents substantially what I said in the other two lectures and I crave the indulgence of Ucheka Akanimo to hide under her now positively viral video to expand the audience of the message: “LEADERSHIP QUALITIES – Everyone is familiar with the saying that the youths are the leaders of tomorrow. Yes, you will be leaders tomorrow. Tomorrow! Not today! Don’t ask me when that tomorrow will come in Nigeria. The sad truth however is that most youths today have negatively seized leadership in that they have become disobedient to constituted authority, known norms, etiquettes, good manners and morals, elders, and even to their own parents! It is so bad that a lot of parents have resigned from their God-given responsibilities to ‘teach your child the way to go … and when he grows up he wont depart from it’. They blame it on the unacceptable excuse of ‘children of nowadays’!
As Catholic youths and who aspire to, not just be leaders, but effective leaders, you must bring yourselves up to be responsible individuals. You must develop in yourselves those attitudinal qualities which will equip you for that effectiveness in leadership. Effective and good leadership depend on attitudinal qualities are essential for a successful relationship with the people you lead. These qualities include: (a) integrity, (b) honesty, (c) humility, (d) courage, (e) commitment, (f) sincerity, (g) passion, (h) confidence, (i) positivity, (j) wisdom, (k) determination, (l) compassion, (m) sensitivity, (n) effective communication skills, (o) respect.
People who are blessed with these characteristics naturally attract followers. These qualities tend to produce a charismatic effect. Followers are naturally drawn to people who exhibit strength and can inspire belief in others. Charisma results from effective leadership and the qualities which enable effective leadership.
What does each of these qualities mean? Time will not permit me to examine all of them but let us take a few very significant ones -
(a) Integrity – This is a quality of steadfastly adhering to high moral principles. It is both a raw material and a product of responsible behaviour. A person who lives his life with integrity reaps the image of a person with integrity. He earns the respect of society. Integrity combines with other qualities such as knowledge and wisdom to make an effective leader. As Samuel Johnson Rasselas once said, "Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful."
(b) Honesty – Like integrity, honesty is a quality of being fair and truthful in ones dealings with others. It is the quality of being morally upright always. You cannot be responsible without being honest. Honesty is, like integrity, both a raw material and a product of responsible behaviour.
An honest person does not tell lies. A lying tongue is a potential thief and a very dangerous person. In today’s world, we glamorize lies and see persons who are habitual liars as ‘smart guys’. But I know that the Bible tells me that all liars have their part to play in the lake of fire which burneth with brimstones. Never tell lies. Never get involved in anything about which you cannot tell the truth.
(c) Humility – Avoid pride. Proud people hardly get to their ultimate destinations in life. The Bible tells us that pride goes before destruction.
(d) Respect – The first element of responsible behaviour is respect. Everyone must learn to develop the spirit of respect. Respect for everything in creation. Respect for the creator. Respect for fellow men. Respect for rules and regulations. Respect for time. Respect for superiors.
(i) Respect for Rules – As already stated above, rules and regulations are an integral part of every orderly society. A society where there are no rules and regulations would be worse than hell because even in hell there are the rules of lawlessness. I had the privilege of delivering a paper to a distinguished audience recently whereat I lamented that for “so many years now, Nigeria has been adrift as though there are no more rules, regulations and laws for the running of a civilised society. A culture of monumental impunity pervades the country. It is the culture of ‘nothing spoil’ and ‘nothing dey happen’ in all spheres of our lives. There is a near-complete overwhelming of the law enforcement machineries of our nation such that our youths are even unaware that this country is governed by law”. Do you think I am correct that youths are even unaware that this country is governed by law? Think about it.
(ii) Respect for Time – In this country, there is something generally referred to as ‘African time’! This is a shameless description of a culture of utter disrespect for time. It allows us to accept that when a programme is stated to take place at, say 12 noon, it is graceful and acceptable to start at 2 pm and participants can stroll in at 2.30 and beyond. You know, I understand that among young persons, it is considered that it is stylish even on their wedding day to arrive the wedding Mass late! This is not responsible behaviour and I wish to enjoin you as young persons to cultivate a different type of culture where time is respected so that a 7 am lecture or Mass must be understood and taken to take place at 7 am.
(iii) Respect for Elders – Respect for elders is responsible behaviour. This is Nigeria. This is Africa. Here it is traditionally responsible behaviour to respect elders. A responsible person would never abuse an elderly person or remain seated while his elders have no place to sit. In fact, the Bible forbids that one should criticise an elder.
(iv) Respect for Labour – I grew up being familiar with the expression ‘dignity of labour’. I hardly hear the expression these days and it would appear that the expression means nothing to anybody in this country today. Yet everybody wants to get rich and get rich fast even at tender ages. People no longer have respect for working to earn their money. We all just want to ‘hammer’ almost as soon as our mothers are delivered of us at the maternity ward. Little wonder corruption has become another accepted culture in Nigeria.
We have, as a people, lost our sensibilities to thieving and stealing. We have lost our ability to question absurdities. As a result, we are unable to raise eye-brows when a young graduate who has hardly started working begins to build mansions and drive big cars. Shame on the parents of such young person who fail to ask their child the source of his sudden wealth and reprimand and possibly report him as appropriate. If it were that easy to become wealthy overnight, how come his parents are not similarly wealthy? It is said that behind every sudden wealth, there is a crime.
CONSEQUENCES OF IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOUR – A number of unhappy things happen to an irresponsible. He becomes insensitive to his environment and tends to labour under a sense of impunity which drives him to think that he can do anything as he feels without a realisation that there are always consequences.
You Reap What You Sow – There is a basic law in nature which our Lord spoke about. This is that everyone reaps what he sows. If you sow evil, you will reap evil. It is therefore an aid to responsible behaviour for everyone to remember that you cannot escape the rewards or fruits of the particular seeds you sow.
Evils of Homosexuality – In Genesis 18:20, God said ‘there are terrible accusations against Sodom and Gomorrah, and their sin is very great’.
What do you think was the sin of the people of Sodom and Gomorrah? Lot had two visitors. They were men. At night and before Lot’s visitors went to bed, the youths in Sodom came to him and demanded that he should hand his visitors to them because ‘the men of Sodom wanted to have sex with them’.
It is sad that today, it is common knowledge that homosexuality abounds. Men shamelessly making love to men and getting ‘married’ to each other. Women doing likewise. This is perversion at its height. God says ‘their sin is very great’. No responsible youth does such things.
Improper Dressing – Today, sadly, we are assaulted by the sight of young persons going about our streets virtually naked deliberately in the name of fashion. There is a sickening ‘fashionable’ style of dressing known as ‘sagging’ or ‘low-waist’. Both boys and girls are involved. And ladies deliberately make dresses exposing their breasts!
You cannot be a Catholic youth aspiring to leadership positions in society and dress that way! Impressions are formed as to the kind of person you are from the way people see you dress. You have only one chance to make a first impression. A prostitute announces her kind of business usually from the way she is dressed. So also is a thug.
Drugs – Never depend on drugs. Leave alcohol alone. Tramadol is dangerous to your life. So also is codeine, hemp, cocaine etc.
Vulgarism and Profanity – I am worried by the way young persons loosely use their tongue. They are abusive. They are flippant. They gossip. They are vulgar. They are profane. No one who is loose with his tongue can be an effective leader.
Jesus the Christ tells us that it is what comes out of you that kills you and not what you eat. Therefore always be cautious what you say because the words you speak have life. Alexander Pope in his Essays on Criticism says ‘words are like (dry) leaves and where they most abound much fruit of sense beneath is rarely found’.
The words you utter are like raw eggs. Once they fall they break and cannot be retrieved. A responsible Catholic youth should never be flippant with his tongue because the Bible says in Proverbs 10:19, ‘the more you talk, the more likely you are to sin. If you are wise, you will keep quiet’.
A talkative individual is likely to be a gossip and the Bible says ‘gossip is spread by wicked people; they stir up trouble and break friendship’. (Prov. 16:28).
In Sirach 5:9 – 14, the Bible admonishes us that you must ‘be certain about what you believe and consistent in what you say. Don’t try to please everyone or agree with everything people say.
Always be ready to listen, but take your time in answering.
Answer only if you know what to say, and if you don’t know what to say, keep quiet.
Speaking can bring you either honour or disgrace; what you say can ruin you.
Don’t get a reputation for being a gossip, and don’t tell tales that will hurt people.
Just as thieves will suffer disgrace, so liars will suffer severe condemnation’.
Always therefore be courteous and polite in your speeches because ‘if you are polite and courteous, you will enjoy the friendship of many people. Exchange greetings with many, but take advice from only one person out of a thousand. When you make friends, don’t be too quick to trust them; make sure that they have proved themselves’. (Sirach 6:5 -7).
Evils of Cultism - Only cowards who cannot hold their own join cults. Cultism is evil. It is also a crime. Such persons are not fit to be leaders.
Examination Malpractice – Cursed is every lecturer who compromises his position with respect to students placed under his care. Stupid is the student who engages in any form of examination malpractice instead of studying to pass his examinations. And to every parent who encourages and pays for his child to ‘pass’ examinations through malpractice, your place is the hottest part of hell. Examination malpractice is evil. It is also a crime. No one involved is examination malpractice is fit for leadership”.
