Please What Should I Do? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 12:23pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
There is the relationship issue that has been bothering me for sometime now. The longer I keep it to myself, the more it kills me on the inside. Please I need anybody's counsel......... Right from my secondary school days to my NYSC days I have never wooed a girl, let alone be in a relationship. Due to circumstances and life events that were beyond my control I had to relocate to Benin City in 2017. I had plans of doing so many things but I had no support. So I decided to go into teaching. I got a job in a secondary school to teach Maths and Chemistry (which I am still doing presently). The pay is N23000. Things were very rough for me for the first 4months because I had to get an apartment of my own, as well as furnishing it......... A year later, a female teacher joined us. Some months later I picked interest in her as I like her kind of person. Her hot-temper, stubborness, strictness and being a principled person attracted me to her. Though she has her flaws, I really do not mind. |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 12:51pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
So I said to myself,'why don't i approach her since I am attracted to her, besides I am not growing younger anymore. I am already in my 30s or is this how i want to end my life?. No, I want to feel what it is like to fall in love and to be loved by someone.'........... I decided to become friends with her in order to make my intentions known to her. One thing led to the other and we became real close to the extent that I know her mother and siblings, as well as visiting them. We also do confide in each other. My feelings for her grew the more. It was on one of such visits that I opened up to her on my feelings for her............. She looked at me and said that she knows that I am already in love with her. But she can't date me because she knows that I don't look like someone who is ready to settle down in even 3years time, let alone this year. As for me, this year will not pass me by. Dating you will delay me. She added,"besides you are a first-born and I don't pray to marry a first-born son.... |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by joceey(m): 1:07pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
so abeg free her and ignore her side for now ................such lady no see you has a man that has future. 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Nobody: 1:13pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
She isn't interested, plain and simple. You should have make your intentions known from the onset instead of getting yourself into this mess. You're too close and familiar already. If you pressurised her into accepting you, you gonna regrets your action because she is gonna make your life a living hell. Just move on with your life and keep improving yourself. 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 1:20pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Because first-borns have a lot of responsibilities which I don't want". Aside that, I don't think your family back-ground is even better than mine. I pray for a man with a better family background or is it with N23000 you want to use to date a girl. No, I can't",she concluded. I tried to say something but her reactions over-powered me. I did not know what to do as I was deeply in love. I still kept on visiting in order not appear defeated and we still kept our friendship, though I stopped discussing family................ November 2019, a male teacher joined us and he is a Pastor, he is older than I am. 2weeks later she told me that Pastor asked her out and that he intends to marry her. She said that she hasn't replied him yet. 4days later, I asked her if she had given him a reply yet. She said that she told him yes and that was because her mother went to pray over his name with 3 different Pastors and it was discovered that he has a bright and shining future ahead of him. |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Orubebe01: 1:22pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Look for next available flight. No time to waste. 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Ugochiboy: 1:23pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
joceey:As painful as it sound, this is pure truth. You don't force yourself to be love by someone. There are many people out there who will really love you for who you are. My advice for you is to stop giving her unnecessary attention i.e move your attention to someone else. 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Nobody: 1:27pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Use your time to double ur hustle & focus on urself bro... u will get better and meet the girl that is for u. Good luck bro 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by mofeoluwadassah: 1:39pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Answer to your question is very obvious na  |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 1:46pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
I wanted to ask her,"did your mother pray over my name too? I did not ask out of shame for I just felt that looking at me alone, you don't need a soothsayer to tell my future. I felt so depressed and weakened on the inside. That night i tried to sleep but could not. I still kept on visiting to hide my feelings.................... Fast forward to March 2020, she and Pastor had a serious misunderstanding that lasted for 2weeks. She told me of it, during that 2weeks they didn't talk to each other. I could not say anything lest she says that has it not been my wish that she should have issues with Pastor since she turned my offer down (like i wrote earlier,she has her flaws and one of her flaws is that she talks alot and most times without thinking, especially when provoked)....... She went further to say that she doesn't think she can marry him because he has some attitudes that she won't be able to put up with in marriage and that she will give anybody that comes a chance (that is double date) |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 2:10pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
I didn't say anything out of fear of what she may reply me with................ All of a sudden she started giving me some signals (green light), like constant and frequent touching, holding my hands, resting her head on my chest and when her mother is not around, she will delibrately bring up sex topics and all other stuffs like that. I felt somehow and ignored her through out that day. She kept on pressing any time I visited and being that I love her I played along............. Fast forward to this Tuesday that just passed, I went visiting as I normally do. On sighting me, she just frowned and looked angry. I pretended not to notice as I greeted her mother and her siblings. When we were alone, I moved close to her to talk to her, she stood and went to sit on another chair. The manner in which she stood up made me to check myself if I had body odour. I smelled nice. Then what did I do? I did not do anything, that i am sure of. I tried to brighten her up by calling her pet names. The frown was still there |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by AfroKnight: 2:26pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
You must work on your self esteem. That girl is not worth shît. You need set her straight. Secondly, how the fûck can you say you’re attracted to her hot temper and stubbornness? Are you okay? Are you looking for someone to give you stress and strife? Don’t you want peace of mind? She said you’re not ready to settle down yet dated someone who earns the same salary as you. Bro, she’s messing with your mind. This girl is only good for a one night stand. If you don’t want to do that with her then ignore her. You are not a shoulder for her to lean on. Her problem no concern you. Respect yourself, man. Besides, your salary is not going to be enough if you start spending it on her. Whatever you can save should go to starting up a side hustle. She’s not worth your time. She’s not even worth 10 minutes of nakking. 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 2:33pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
I moved close to her again to try to cheer her up. The way she jumped and shouted shocked me. I became scared. In order not to draw the attention of those that were inside, I gave out a long laugh that suggested that we were pranking ourselves. The manner in which she hissed at me afterwards humbled me. I had to keep quiet. The silence lasted for about an hour (during that time I was thinking of how to leave without having to look like someone who was not happy).......... When she noticed that my mood had changed, she said,"it is just that i have this head-ache that has been disturbing me every night". 'let me leave you to rest then', I replied. She agreed. And that was how i picked up what was left of myself and left. What did I do wrong was the question my mind as walked home. Out of fear of the sin I must have committed unknowingly, I sent her an apology text that night. She didn't reply. |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by dannex4adx(m): 2:37pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Bro! forget about her. first eradicate the poverty in your life first. Pray hard to God for breakthrough and favour. Let her insults to you be your motivation to pray to God to give you destiny helpers. Ire ooo! 3 Likes |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by frozen70(f): 3:00pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
ewa20buredi100: She is just scared thst you can't keep to your words tgat you want to settle down Give her your words once more and assure her of your trust Then put intrest on it and make it work No body likes likes pick and drop |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by halogate: 3:01pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
| ..instead of u to focus on ur life and aim towards improving ur condition...u dey allow woman finger ur brain up and down. .. continue u hear.. ...na when u don see 99 for her hand naim ur eye go clear. ..wasting time and energy on the wrong person!! ..guyman, dem need reset ur Medula Oblongata. ..when Mr Right comes her way.... she's gonna drop ur a$$ like hot charcoal. #BeWarned... 3 Likes |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 3:03pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Then on Thursday I went to her place. When I got there she wasn't around. So I waited till she returned. When she came in, there was happiness and excitement written all over her face. She went in to change and came out, still looking happy. I was surprised because this was the same girl that shouted at me 2days ago. I was curious to know what happened, though i didn't ask.......... When we were alone, she started touching and rubbing me. I ignored her and did not reciprocate. When she noticed that I ignored her, she started apologising, smiling and saying that it was Pastor that made her angry on that Tuesday when she went to his place that day and that she and Pastor are back together. She said that she was just coming from his place, and that she even cooked for him after the evening service. She said that she was sorry for not telling me earlier............. Then i asked her, "is it because of him you made me look like a fool that day? She started smiling and apologising while rubbing my chest |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 3:23pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
I was so ashamed of myself that I did not know when I told her that I wasn't feeling too well and I want to take my leave. That was how I left her place that day................... Since on Thursday till today, I have not gone to her place. Please nairalanders, I am drowning emotionally. I have tried several times to get her off my head and mind, I just can't do it. Why? Is it because it is my first time loving someone? Or is it how first time experience feels? Do I ignore her? And for how long do you think I can ignore her given that we work in the same place? I am still trusting God for a better job. Why do I love her so much? Please talk to me.(cc: Rocktation, farano) |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Lamanii22(f): 3:31pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
dannex4adx: Yes! I agree with you... Forget about that lady totally. OP just work harder... Keep writing job applicatons, keep praying, never give up... Girls would begin to chase you afterwards... 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Adaogwashi1(f): 3:44pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
ewa20buredi100:Let me advice you as a woman please leave that girl alone she's just using you to make herself happy whenever the pastor make her angry just leave her and move on. I still remain Ada ogwashi  |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Tina001(f): 3:45pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
ewa20buredi100: You tried getting her off your head by constantly visiting her or what? My friend, ignore the Lady. To think you are not a teenager and the Lady too, what's with the rubbing of your chest, talking sex with you when she has Pastor? I don't understand. How can two matured people be behaving like this?. Op, you love her but she doesn't love you or probably she loves you but wants to keep you as second option in case things go south with Pastor. Please don't give room for that, either she chooses you or her Pastor, kindly ignore her and move on, so what if you both work in same place? Is she the only female teacher?, relate with her the way you relate with the rest. You can just greet and go about your daily activity till you close for the day 2 Likes |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Seandisputed(m): 3:59pm On Apr 12, 2020 |
Are you that idle that you visit almost everyday? You should be thinking of looking for private lessons instead of chasing someone who's confused. Set your priorities right my friend. |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 8:35am On Apr 13, 2020 |
dannex4adx:Amen.Thank you 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 8:38am On Apr 13, 2020 |
Lamanii22:Thank you for the encouragement 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 8:40am On Apr 13, 2020 |
Adaogwashi1:Leaving her seems so impossible to do. Why do I feel this way? |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Nicklaus619(m): 9:14am On Apr 13, 2020 |
Adaogwashi1: |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Gpopsicle(m): 10:09am On Apr 13, 2020 |
It is so obvious she doesn't love you. She is taking advantage of your emotions. You give her unnecessary attention and this will do you no good. Cut every ties with her. I know it will be kinda difficult but that's the best thing to do in order to be emotionally sane. For God's sake, you're man and stop being mushy and weak. Take charge of your emotions and walk away. 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ewa20buredi100: 10:28am On Apr 13, 2020 |
Tina001:Thank you. Forgetting about her seems so hard to do. Why do i feel this way? Also what explanation do i give her mother if she asks me the reason i stopped visiting? |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by PureGoldh(m): 10:30am On Apr 13, 2020 |
ewa20buredi100: @bolded texts.....she is a typical example of Financial woman.. If you know you Know |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by Everest25(m): 10:53am On Apr 13, 2020 |
ewa20buredi100:Tell her Mama that you have Corona Birus, that is the reason you stopped coming... |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by tunize(m): 10:55am On Apr 13, 2020 |
And the day dem born this one ppl dance sey dem born pikin. It seems even with you working u're still jobless with the way u visit the girl everyday. Because u nvr in anyway indicated where she even came visiting you not even for ones. At ur 30's u're still not sensible enough to understand a simple No so at what age then will u now have sense 40's? Eventually u marry dis girl that u are even the one using ur hand to manipulate urself with because is quite obvious, meaning wen una don marry she would be the head, while you b the tail. You're really terrible i must confess nor focus on ur life carry woman for head like gala. Bttr learn to accept rejection for this life. 1 Like |
| Re: Please What Should I Do? by ChybuzzDD(m): 11:23am On Apr 13, 2020 |
Nawaoo! There are really different "types" of men! 1 Like |
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