The hashtag #SayNoToRape has been trending this week all over the social media space in Nigeria. Now, what is the hashtag all about? On the 27th of May, 2020, an undergraduate of The University of Benin, UNIBEN, (Vera Uwaila Omoduwa), had gone out to study at a popular new generation church, The Redeemed Christian Church of God, Ikpoba Hill, in Benin City, Edo State. Sadly, she was brutally raped and left unconscious by her attackers. Unfortunately, despite all efforts by sympathizers to save her life by taking her to the hospital, she died.

Now, more women are coming out of their closets to speak out after years of stigmatization. The death of the young lady was a catalyst.

How serious is rape to the emotions and well-being of victims? In a lot of societies, rape is seen as a stigma, especially against the victims. Sometimes, victims of families tend to cover it up as they see it as an act of God. Painfully, the perpetrators are forgiven at the end. Tell me, how victims can speak up when they believe the society will not only reprimand them but also stigmatized them?

Moreover, these rape victims carry the scar of rape to adulthood and into their respective families (the children and spouses get caught in the emotional and physical reactions). Sadly, the victims may withdraw into depression and isolation. The consequence of that is a hyperactive sexual drive or an emotional sexual withdrawal. The majority of them becoming prostitutes later on in life. Their marriages become messy due to low sexual drives.

Unfortunately, society plays a part because they start mocking victims. They call them immoral for dressing in provocative ways, therefore, attracting rapists.

Sadly, rape can be carried out by family members such as uncles, aunties, cousins, family friends, fathers, and mothers. The victims are coerced not to voice out their fears with the threats of deaths. It is a societal problem. Shamefully, the government is not doing enough to curtail and arrest those involved. But, how can the government arrest perpetrators when the victims themselves cannot speak up?

In Africa alone, 70% of rape victims do not speak up. In Nigeria, the figures can be higher (85% and above). Cultures and traditions play a huge role in preventing victims from speaking up.

In Europe and North America, victims speak up because the government and society encourages them to do so. They have functional NGOs that fight for victims and see to it that they get justice. The justice systems expedite the process without cases adjoining unnecessarily.

How can victims speak out?

1. Government should set up correctional and rehabilitation centers across the African continent

Both the victims and the perpetrators can get justice and punishment respectively. Perpetrators are taken to correctional facilities immediately they are released from prisons. They are enlightened and informed. Therapy should be prescribed in case it snowballs into a psychological issue. Victims should receive proper medical treatments for STDs and other sexually transmitted diseases.

2. Use the print and electronic media to educate people

The print and electronic media is one viable tool the government can use to encourage rape victims. It can be used to persuade victims to speak up against their perpetrators. Social media is another tool. The media will embolden them.

3. The government should pass laws against rapists

The rate of rape cases will reduce drastically when laws with stiffer punishments are enacted. But in Africa, the government is docile in the area of enacting laws that should protect victims. That is why these rapists get emboldened to perpetrate more crimes because they believe the system will not prosecute them.

They will not hesitate to pass such laws if the victim were to be the family member of a politician,

4. Parents should educate their wards on decency

Most parents in Africa shy away from teaching their children sex education. They fear it will encourage waywardness. However, the reverse is the case because it will guide them on the proper need to be decent. They will compose themselves in public.

Protection is better than cure, although people can dress the way they like.

Provocative dressings that influence sex perverts should be avoided.

5. Schools should join hands in enlightenment campaigns

After homes, schools are the second place children get to learn proper societal upbringings. From time to time, schools should educate students about the dangers of rape. They should encourage victims to confide in them. Eventually, this works wonderfully because the rape victims confide in their teachers and confess who raped them.

6. Boost their self-confidence and self-esteem

Victims of rape are left traumatized. Their self-confidence and self-esteem drops to its lowest ebb. Virtually, they lost interest in everything that used to interest them. Parents should encourage them. After all, it is not the end of the world and they can still achieve something meaningful in their lives.

7. Parent and guidance should ask probing questions

When questions are asked in caring manners, it fosters trust between both parties (parents and victims). Again, because of the shame that is involved, a lot of victims retreat into their 'shells,' and are unwilling to expose perpetrators. But, when parents and guidance engaged them in conversations that foster love and care (without being judgmental), rape victims eventually open up.

8. Societies should desist from stigmatization

Why can't society show support and care to rape victims, why put shame on them? This action could lead to active withdrawal. Gradually, depression and suicidal thoughts could creep. Questions like, “was she not the one that dressed that way for her to be raped?” or “why will she not be raped when she keeps jumping from men to men?” Or “did she enjoy not get pleasured while they raped her?” Such silly questions would be very traumatic.

9. Family members should not cover up rape cases

This could be a result of the shame of a loved one that was raped. Or they could attribute it to the will of God: that it is the will of God for allowing their daughter to be rape by the perpetrators.

Finally, the perpetrators are forgiven. Is that not foolish? Perpetrators of rape should be severely punished by the court of law. The National Dailies should publish their pictures. Others will desist from such an evil act.

The confidence of victims is Re-energized when families keep finding justices.

10. Engaged the services of qualified counselors (psychologists or therapists)

They are knowledgeable in their professions. They have the experience. They have the qualification to attend. They can handle any sensitive case like rape. They know what to do to psyche victims up. Also, they can handle additional cases of depression and stigmatization.

11. Non-governmental organizations can help out

They can seek justice for victims without taking a dime. There are numerous NGOs in Africa that are set up to seek justice for rape victims.

#SayNoToRape #JusticeforOmoduwa #SpeakUpNow #RapeIsACrimeAgainstHumanity #MeToo

We hear u.