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Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 8:15pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Yes.

The first part is acts of service which if done joyfully is heartwarming.

While a lot of Nigerian women might WANT a husband who doesn't require them to pay Bills, the average Nigerian woman NEEDS to jointly (perhaps not in same ratio) pay the bills of the home.

I can assure you that a woman who runs a bath for her husband, cleans the house, looks after the children and is ready to have sex is not as hard to come by as you think.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 8:16pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


You obviously do not understand her philosophy.

She has said severally that women should earn money HOWEVER solely depend on their husbands financially while they (wives) provide the emotional needs of a home.


How is it related to the post you quoted?

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 8:17pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


How is it related to the post you quoted?

That the 'Cinderella' is not necessarily a financial state. undecided
Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 8:18pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


That the 'Cinderella' is not necessarily a financial state. undecided

Ok. So what does the Prince save her from?

4 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 8:18pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


I can assure you that a woman who runs a bath for her husband, cleans the house, looks after the children and is ready to have sex is not as hard to come by as you think.

I never said it was hard to come by:

I said a woman who shares the bills is easier to come by than the above.

It is easier to drop money than serve joyfully especially in the 21st century.

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 8:19pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


I never said it was hard to come by:

I said a woman who shares the bills is easier to come by than the above.

It is easier to drop money than serve joyfully especially in the 21st century.

In Nigeria?

4 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 8:22pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


In Nigeria?

Yes in Nigeria.

Sharing bills (not paying all) is a bragging rights on how 'independent' and 'strong' a woman is.

Tending to her husband (especially) and kids is not.

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 8:24pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Yes in Nigeria.

Sharing bills (not paying all) is a bragging rights on how 'independent' and 'strong' a woman is.

Tending to her husband (especially) and kids is not.

Sharing bills is considered special (although it is not) whereas tending to husband and kids taken for granted, that's why they will brag about the former and not the latter.

Playing the devoted housewife is what most ladies (yes I said it) who are in love do, even before they get the ring. grin

9 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Mariangeles(f): 8:36pm On Jun 25, 2020
Romangalactic:

Enough bile for u to address all written by your own hand cheesy Enjoy


Arsenal win! Ope o! grin

So, wetin you been dey yarn? Wait first, before you answer that one...wetin you think about this new 5 players, 3 substitute rule? E make sense abi?
grin
Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Bigblessed: 8:42pm On Jun 25, 2020
Nothing Seun no-go see 4 nairaland.

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Nobody: 8:48pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


Not all men who want a working wife want her for financial reasons. Even some men who can afford to take care of all financial expenses alone are not satisfied with a woman who does not work. There are many men who want an ambitious, educated woman who has things going for herself, who is driven, who has a vision, who is influential and passionate about her profession or whatever she chooses to do outside.

It's only on NL that men have two requirements, youth and beauty. In the world out there many men have higher standards. They want their wives to be and do more than just look pretty.


Exactly!
Honestly some things I read here from so called Married women shock me. Lol I thought thropy/house wife thing stopped long ago, seeing someone encourage it and even go as far as putting those who think otherwise down shocked me to the core. Seriously? Women whose life revolves around Men and have nothing to their names or personal lives still exist? Lol.
I can't advise a Man to marry a woman who has nothing going for herself even if he is rich. Such women tend to turn out spoilt , entitled, ungrateful, uncultured,unproductive liabilities to mention a few. They have lots of time to waste and end up not valuing things because they don't know what it worth. A woman without a mind of hers, will she ever serve as a "bounce back" if things go wrong? . Total waste of Time if you ask me.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Nobody: 8:51pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Yes.

The first part is acts of service which if done joyfully is heartwarming.

While a lot of Nigerian women might WANT a husband who doesn't require them to pay Bills, the average Nigerian woman NEEDS to jointly (perhaps not in same ratio) pay the bills of the home.

Cc: Palema 007
So are you saying Ybaby is living in dream Land or just preaching a fantasy?

3 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 8:52pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


Sharing bills is considered special (although it is not) whereas tending to husband and kids taken for granted, that's why they will brag about the former and not the latter.

Playing the devoted housewife is what most ladies (yes I said it) who are in love do, even before they get the ring. grin

Before they get the ring, yes.

Years after, it stops.

Open a thread on how many wives would run a bath for their husband and scrub his back viz a viz those who would pay part of the bills.

3 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Nobody: 8:55pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Before they get the ring, yes.

Years after, it stops.

Open a thread on how many wives would run a bath for their husband and scrub his back viz a viz those who would pay part of the bills.
Wait Bukatyne! Wait you are confusing me. What side are you on? Or what are you trying to bring out?


BTW why would anyone want to run a bath or scrub anyone's back as a duty? Is the back or bath owner handicap?

7 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 8:58pm On Jun 25, 2020
Palema007:
So are you saying Ybaby is living in dream Land?

I think you girls need to talk to married people more viz a viz dream up what you think it should be in the 21st century.

Now, I think of it, a number of men I know who can afford it don't want their wives to pay bills even though they are working and expect their wives to cater to them.

I know some (extreme cases) who have housewives and cater fully to them to their undies and are fine with it.

In fact, that is what they want.

As men make more money, the are more concerned about wives who doll up and cater to them.

Doesn't mean these dolls don't have stuff going for them.

That's why they marry way younger ladies to 'make their blood fresh'.

At the end, a woman's resourcefulness is more important than her earnings.

2 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 8:58pm On Jun 25, 2020
Palema007:
Exactly!
Honestly some things I read here from so called Married women shock me. Lol I thought thropy/house wife thing stopped long ago, seeing someone encourage it and even go as far as putting those who think otherwise down shocked me to the core. Seriously? Women whose life revolves around Men and have nothing to their names or personal lives still exist? Lol.
I can't advise a Man to marry a woman who has nothing going for herself even if he is rich. Such women tend to turn out to spoilt , entitled, ungrateful, uncultured,unproductive liabilities to mention a few. They have lots of time to waste and end up not valuing things because they don't know what it worth. A woman without a mind of hers, will she ever serve as a "bounce back" if things go wrong? . Total waste of Time if you ask me.

I have no problem with couples who opt for the traditional model. It has many advantages for the family as a whole. Many more people would choose this model if they could afford it. The biggest disadvantage is that it leaves women in a vulnerable position. They will have to put up with statements such as "those who pay the piper bla bla bla" and their contribution to the family and even wider community is not only played down but disrespected even though the workload of a housewife who runs a well-organized household, cooks fresh food, looks after the children, takes care of the husband is colossal. The same people who have this mindset complain about women who no longer want to be oppressed and abused in the name of 'I dictate the tune" and opt for a career or demand that the husband shares chores and participates in childcare.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 8:59pm On Jun 25, 2020
Palema007:
Wait Bukatyne! Wait you are confusing me. What side are you on? Or what are you trying to bring out?


BTW why would anyone want to run a bath or scrub anyone's back as a duty? Is the back or bath owner handicap?

@Hathor5

I am sure if you ask Azira if she would spilt bills, she would say yes with her full cheat.

Follow the conversation.

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:01pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Before they get the ring, yes.

Years after, it stops.

Open a thread on how many wives would run a bath for their husband and scrub his back viz a viz those who would pay part of the bills.

Why would I open a thread after you have presented me with your research? cheesy
I have the feeling that you tell yourself such things to make yourself feel special. No offense.

10 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:01pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:



I am sure if you ask Azira if she would spilt bills, she would say yes with her full cheat.

Follow the conversation.

6 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 9:02pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


I have no problem with couples who opt for the traditional model. It has many advantages for the family as a whole. Many more people would choose this model if they could afford it.
The biggest disadvantage is that it leaves women in a vulnerable position. They will have to put up with statements such as "those who pay the piper bla bla bla" and their contribution to the family and even wider community is not only played down but disrespected even though the workload of a housewife who runs a well-organized household, cooks fresh food, looks after the children, takes care of the husband is colossal. The same people who have this mindset complain about women who no longer want to be oppressed and abused in the name of 'I dictate the tune" and opt for a career or demand that the husband shares chores and participates in childcare.

You are coming up cheesy

As per vulnerability of wife: if you want to do husband management, you did better have access to the family purse.

That is the difference between a housewife and a home maker abi husband manager cheesy
Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:03pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


You are coming up cheesy

As per vulnerability of wife: if you want to do husband management, you did better have access to the family purse.

That is the difference between a housewife and a home maker abi husband manager cheesy

He can withdraw your access to it at any time.

5 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 9:03pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


Why would I open a thread after you have presented me with your research? cheesy
I have the feeling that you tell yourself such things to make yourself feel special. No offense.

Why should I feel offended if your opinion about me?

It doesn't count kiss kiss

NL has a wide audience and a good way to sample opinions for free.
Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 9:04pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


He can withdraw your access to it at any time.

The best model for me is a joint account managed by the wife.

Or joint spooling of resources managed by the wife.
Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Mariangeles(f): 9:05pm On Jun 25, 2020

2 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:07pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Why should I feel offended if your opinion about me?

It doesn't count kiss kiss

NL has a wide audience and a good way to sample opinions for free.

Good to know. Then I need not restrain myself now or in future in order not to hurt your feelings. cheesy
I like that!

7 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 9:08pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


Good to know. Then I need not restrain myself now or in future in order not to hurt your feelings. cheesy
I like that!

You can type what you like.

It would only portray your content and breeding. grin

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:08pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


The best model for me is a joint account managed by the wife.

Or joint spooling of resources managed by the wife.


Girl, joint account or not. It's his salary. grin
He can take it from you any time. It takes five minutes to open a new account and have the salary go there.
You are at his mercy.
Explains why you tell yourself that you are so special. cheesy

7 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:09pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


You can type what you like.

It would only portray your content and breeding. grin

We don't breed in my family. I didn't know your family are dogs. kiss

9 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 9:11pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


We don't breed in my family. I didn't know your family are dogs. kiss

Ha!

You have started.

Carry go.

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:13pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Ha!

You have started.

Carry go.

Next time choose your words more carefully when you talk about me and my family. wink

8 Likes

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by bukatyne(f): 9:13pm On Jun 25, 2020
Hathor5:


Girl, joint account or not. It's his salary. grin
He can take it from you any time. It takes five minutes to open a new account and have the salary go there.
You are at his mercy.
Explains why you tell yourself that you are so special. cheesy

Back to my principle.

Choose a trustworthy man such that when you decide to run a joint account, he doesn't run off with the cash one day.

The choice is yours dear.

You have a yam and the knife. kiss

1 Like

Re: Who Is To Find And Fond A House Help by Hathor5(f): 9:13pm On Jun 25, 2020
bukatyne:


Back to my principle.

Choose a trustworthy man such that when you decide to run a joint account, he doesn't run off with the cash one day.

The choice is yours dear.

You have a yam and the knife. kiss

Good luck Buka! wink

3 Likes

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