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Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State - Romance - Nairaland

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Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Ghabz(m): 9:22am On May 26, 2021
Dear Nairalander,
Am a young guy planning on settling down this year. My fiance just got government job in her state (January 2021) while am still in my state hustling with my POS job.
Though distance to each other is just less than an hour & am in search of accommodation in my state. She is of the opinion that traveling during pregnancy will be difficult... She suggested resigning so that we can be together.
Pls i need your honest advice. Thanks

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by BossJamal: 9:31am On May 26, 2021
So how do we advice u when you’re not telling us d states where u both are residing. Abeg we have issues at hand save our reading

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Romanoff(f): 9:37am On May 26, 2021
Set up your POS business in her state after you get married.

Getting transfer as a government worker isn't easy and her income is more steady than yours.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by moriss33(m): 9:37am On May 26, 2021
Oga abeg move ur POS business to her state of residence.
She should not resign that job because of ur ego, pride or whatever.
Move to that state & take care of ur woman & una baby.
You business can still prosper there or better still...consider the new place ur 2nd branch & leave the old one for a sibling or sales girl since it's not too far.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Ghabz(m): 9:40am On May 26, 2021
BossJamal:
So how do we advice u when you’re not telling us d states where u both are residing. Abeg we have issues at hand save our reading
She's in Ekiti & am in Osun.
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by IjapaTiroko: 9:40am On May 26, 2021
Economics is more important than love in most relationships.
She's earning already and won't be a financial burden on you.
I'm also guessing your POS business isn't doing bad.

My suggestion is for you to open a business branch in the state she's living, then open other branches as the business grows. Of course, since she will close by 4pm (I guess), the attendants running the POS shops will be reporting to her as "Oga Madam"

You should only pay her visits this period.

Then when you've got enough money to rent & furnish a little apartment for the both of you, you can move to her state.

But if the POS business isn't doing well in her location, stay where you are.

The goal is for you to try not to be at her mercy in terms of accommodation or finance because she is a woman....I won't say more than this

6 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by BossJamal: 9:50am On May 26, 2021
Ghabz:
She's in Ekiti & am in Osun.
Bros move ur ass to Ekiti pls...drop our men ego and join ur wife to start up a good family fully prepared financially. Forget about what pple will say, dem go talk ,dem go tire and they go finally adjust.

The day money no enter for ur pos biz..wifey fit use her money go market cook small okra soup wey go last una two days. Abi u no lyk am like that?
She’s in govt u are in biz..equation balanced. As she’s also in govt...she can also be saving to help set her side biz with that you guys will be comfortable because there’s nothing as sweet as having multiple streams of income...d day Ekiti govt go owe dem for months she is not worried because she’s in her shop selling, d day pos no pay...u are covered. Se ti gbo?


Mind u I never see where POS biz no dey move except na one typical village wey ur wife dey. Move to Ekiti..u yourself rent a modest house and start life anew. Keep ego aside...Nigeria is somehow now

2 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Ghabz(m): 9:51am On May 26, 2021
IjapaTiroko:
Economics is more important than love in most relationships.
She's earning already and won't be a financial burden on you.
I'm also guessing your POS business isn't doing bad.

My suggestion is for you to open a business branch in the state she's living, then open other branches as the business grows. Of course, since she will close by 4pm (I guess), the attendants running the POS shops will be reporting to her as "Oga Madam"

You should only pay her visits this period.

Then when you've got enough money to rent & furnish a little apartment for the both of you, you can move to her state.

But if the POS business isn't doing well in her location, stay where you are.

The goal is for you to try not to be at her mercy in terms of accommodation or finance because she is a woman....I won't say more than this
She is a teacher & closes by 2pm except Fridays.
Thanks alot.. It's noted

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by ABANGWABOI(m): 10:00am On May 26, 2021
You post is lacking cohesion snd coherence..
All the same, she shouldn't resign cos of marriage and you should also never bend to her rules if not, you are going to be her door mat in the long run..
Come up with solutions that would benefit you both.. all this children running to social media for marriage advice sef.. no wonder it doesn't last this days.
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Ghabz(m): 10:07am On May 26, 2021
Thanks
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by zed7: 11:43am On May 26, 2021
Only if you are not going to be living in her paid accommodation. If you are renting your own place or paying for the place then it's fine.
Women aren't built to handle the financial responsibilities in a relationship. Very soon she will tire of you and you'll lose all respect. Be warned!

3 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Jeon(f): 1:29pm On May 26, 2021
Ghabz:
Dear Nairalander,
Am a young guy planning on settling down this year. My fiance just got government job in her state (January 2021) while am still in my state hustling with my POS job.
Though distance to each other is just less than an hour & am in search of accommodation in my state. She is of the opinion that traveling during pregnancy will be difficult... She suggested resigning so that we can be together.
Pls i need your honest advice. Thanks

Move to her state.
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Bola146(f): 1:37pm On May 26, 2021
Kindly move to her state, POS business is more lucrative everywhere. God will bless your own business too

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by pansophist(m): 1:40pm On May 26, 2021
Let her join you in your state, afterall, it was Eve that joined Adam in the garden of Eden, not the other way round. A woman can be spared of financial responsibilities of her household, but never a man. In anything you do, never give up your financial capability to go and depend on your wife. It always end badly and even if it does not, you'll feel emasculated.

How can a woman give you sex, become pregnant for you and also feed you? Please don't transform that sweet angel of yours to a monster, it's in every woman, and it will come out if you stop being a man in your relationship. Only move to her if you can carry your financial responsibilities, if not, don't move. Women respects a man that takes care of them, or at least not leeching on them, not the opposite. Take care.

7 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Magnoliaa(f): 3:22pm On May 26, 2021
Nawa. undecided Is it Nairalanders that'll come and help you run your home as well, if you're coming here to seek advice for a "problem" as simple as this. Is this even an issue? And you feel you have any business with settling down when you couldn't even sort this out on your own...
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Missmossy(f): 3:29pm On May 26, 2021
Funny thread grin wahala for who never come Nairaland to ask for advise.
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by debbydams(f): 3:34pm On May 26, 2021
Ghabz:
She's in Ekiti & am in Osun.
eyin Temi Bawo ni o shey wa lelelelelele shey wa grin...u already know what to do, so don't stress us grin
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Mikester: 3:40pm On May 26, 2021
You took the words out of my mouth. Op listen to this advice only. It is the naked truth and it is what you need.

pansophist:
Let her join you in your state, afterall, it was Eve that joined Adam in the garden of Eden, not the other way round. A woman can be spared of financial responsibilities of her household, but never a man. In anything you do, never give up your financial capability to go and depend on your wife. It always end badly and even if it does not, you'll feel emasculated.

How can a woman give you sex, become pregnant for you and also feed you? Please don't transform that sweet angel of yours to a monster, it's in every woman, and it will come out if you stop being a man in your relationship. Only move to her if you can carry your financial responsibilities, if not, don't move. Women respects a man that takes care of them, or at least not leeching on them, not the opposite. Take care.

3 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Nobody: 3:45pm On May 26, 2021
park your pos Kaya go meet her, it's very easy than her requesting for a transfer.. but dis one wey she don get better job before you so, make she no come the boss over u oo
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by GeneralPula: 3:47pm On May 26, 2021
It may likely end in tears if you pak yourself to her oo..

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by frozen70(f): 8:53pm On May 26, 2021
Ghabz:
Dear Nairalander,
Am a young guy planning on settling down this year. My fiance just got government job in her state (January 2021) while am still in my state hustling with my POS job.
Though distance to each other is just less than an hour & am in search of accommodation in my state. She is of the opinion that traveling during pregnancy will be difficult... She suggested resigning so that we can be together.
Pls i need your honest advice. Thanks

Do you mean be together in her rented apartment or you rent one for both of you where she base

I will suggest you get your apartment where you are if your business is going well I mean, if you have established yourself there

Pregnant people still travel or you make it a point to be visiting her, while you search for what to do when you finally move

If you move now without doing anything to contribute to the family, don't come here to complain that she uses you like a house boy

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by bigpicture001: 9:44pm On May 26, 2021
Still be careful sha... I don't trust women with good job... Pride always disturb them

I can bet my life your not igbo... Cuz Igbo government working ladies will never date a POS operator and even offer to resign just to be with him.they put money and class first in choice of marriage..

That's the reason alot of ladies in the southeast are old ND unmarried.....
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Ghabz(m): 3:06pm On May 27, 2021
Thank you all for your words. It helps alot.
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Luak(m): 4:09pm On May 27, 2021
Ghabz:
Dear Nairalander,
Am a young guy planning on settling down this year. My fiance just got government job in her state (January 2021) while am still in my state hustling with my POS job.
Though distance to each other is just less than an hour & am in search of accommodation in my state. She is of the opinion that traveling during pregnancy will be difficult... She suggested resigning so that we can be together.
Pls i need your honest advice. Thanks
it will not be easy for you but you have to let her stay permanently in her home state. Join her and grow your kids. A time will come when you can conveniently travel for business and stay for months without your family bearing the brunt

2 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by Frenzy01(m): 5:15pm On May 27, 2021
Bros.. Keep hustling. POS work is nothing to start a relationship talkless a family.



Abeg.. I sell and I buy any breed of dogs swiftly at a very reasonable price. I also offer Boarding and pet care services. Checkout my siggy for contact information and slide into my DM so we could strike a deal
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by cobi11: 6:50pm On May 27, 2021
For the time been i advise you relocate..
When God blesses you both and enlarge your coast you can move to any city you like.
Happened yo me and my fiancee then..i moved from warfi to Bauchi but today we are in Ph because i got a much much better and lucrative job..she sef had to resign to now reli ate again with me . OUR Family is established here


BossJamal pos t=102075589:

Bros move ur ass to Ekiti pls...drop our men ego and join ur wife to start up a good family fully prepared financially. Forget about what pple will say, dem go talk ,dem go tire and they go finally adjust.

The day money no enter for ur pos biz..wifey fit use her money go market cook small okra soup wey go last una two days. Abi u no lyk am like that?
She’s in govt u are in biz..equation balanced. As she’s also in govt...she can also be saving to help set her side biz with that you guys will be comfortable because there’s nothing as sweet as having multiple streams of income...d day Ekiti govt go owe dem for months she is not worried because she’s in her shop selling, d day pos no pay...u are covered. Se ti gbo?


Mind u I never see where POS biz no dey move except na one typical village wey ur wife dey. Move to Ekiti..u yourself rent a modest house and start life anew. Keep ego aside...Nigeria is somehow now
Re: Should I Leave My State & Settle In My Fiance's State by romunu(m): 7:05pm On May 27, 2021
Them say who no get money to contribute,go use body work ooo. My brother,in my opinion I would advise you to japa to her state, tour breakthrough might be there.

1 Like

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