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Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote - Romance - Nairaland

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Poll: Should Marriage Destroy Friendship?

yes: 33% (1 vote)
No: 33% (1 vote)
it depends on the type of friendship: 0% (0 votes)
it depends on my spouse: 33% (1 vote)
This poll has ended

How Telemundo Destroy Our Ladies Emotionally / What Effect Does Marriage Have On You? / Does Marriage Make People Happy Or Do Happy People Get Married? (2) (3) (4)

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Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 1:46am On Jun 01, 2011
[size=14pt]Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?[/size]

Dear Linda, I am so angry right now that I can't even explain. She was my best friend for 13 years. My very best friend since our high school days. We did everything together, even lived together in my parents house for a few years before she met her husband. She got married last December and I've only seen her twice since then. Everytime I call her for a meet up, she comes up with one excuse or the other. I've only ever been invited to her matrimonial home once. These days I am so anxious about calling because she acts like I am disturbing her. Her marriage has put a huge strain on our friendship and I am devastated. I never thought marriage would take my best friend away. Please help share with your readers and ask them if friendship have to change when one party gets married and the other remains single? And what's the best way to deal with this anger I feel towards her?

Please share your thoughts.

http://lindaikeji..com/2011/05/dear-lib-readers-does-marriage-destroy.html
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by iice(f): 4:03am On Jun 01, 2011
In some ways yes.
Too many factors involved: Shift of priority. Organizations/management. Understanding. Perceptions/beliefs. Acceptance/Independence.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by noblegas2(m): 6:24am On Jun 01, 2011
aloy/emeka:

[size=14pt]Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?[/size]

Dear Linda, I am so angry right now that I can't even explain. She was my best friend for 13 years. My very best friend since our high school days. We did everything together, even lived together in my parents house for a few years before she met her husband. She got married last December and I've only seen her twice since then. Everytime I call her for a meet up, she comes up with one excuse or the other. I've only ever been invited to her matrimonial home once. These days I am so anxious about calling because she acts like I am disturbing her. Her marriage has put a huge strain on our friendship and I am devastated. I never thought marriage would take my best friend away. Please help share with your readers and ask them if friendship have to change when one party gets married and the other remains single? And [size=15pt]what's the best way to deal with this anger I feel towards her?[/size]
Please share your thoughts.

http://lindaikeji..com/2011/05/dear-lib-readers-does-marriage-destroy.html

Simple, Just understand that she`s married, which kind stupid meet up do u want with her again na?? if i be her husband and i catch u hen?
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Basics007: 6:22pm On Jun 01, 2011
Dont even know if NL is turnin to an extension of Linda Ikeji's blog these days. Every little story there is transmitted to NL straight up!
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by PurestBoy(m): 6:23pm On Jun 01, 2011
Basics007:

Dont even know if NL is turnin to an extension of Linda Ikeji's blog these days. Every little story there is transmitted to NL straight up!

So u too don notice that too?
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Basics007: 7:33pm On Jun 01, 2011
Seriously is gettin too
PurestBoy:

So u too don notice that too?
Lol. Maybe Linda is on Nairaland. Funny thing is the topics keep makin homepage. The one about attractive pastors' wives is already on homepage
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 11:02pm On Jun 01, 2011
In some ways yes.
Too many factors involved: Shift of priority. Organizations/management. Understanding. Perceptions/beliefs. Acceptance/Independence.

So you'll dump your friends whenever you get married?
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Dsense(m): 11:07pm On Jun 01, 2011
iice:

In some ways yes.
Too many factors involved: Shift of priority. Organizations/management. Understanding. Perceptions/beliefs. Acceptance/Independence.

I seconded!
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Nobody: 11:21pm On Jun 01, 2011
@poster
obviously the husband has told his wifey to stay away from such friends and wifey didnt have the guts to tell "her friend"
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 11:42pm On Jun 01, 2011
MRbrownJAY:

@poster
obviously the husband has told his wifey to stay away from such friends and wifey didnt have the guts to tell "her friend"

A man has no right to tell his wife what to do.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Nobody: 2:04am On Jun 02, 2011
^^^^the sad fact is that you are right BUT many deluded women will comply to their insecure husbands, just to stay "happily married" and thus live a very sad life in the process (being mad at the whole world while the answer is in their damn hands)
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 2:20am On Jun 02, 2011
MRbrownJAY:

^^^^the sad fact is that you are right BUT many deluded women will comply to their insecure husbands, just to stay "happily married" and thus live a very sad life in the process (being mad at the whole world while the answer is in their damn hands)

Will you rather disobey your husband's orders and scatter your family simply because you desperately wants to keep your friends?
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Nobody: 2:52am On Jun 02, 2011
^^my view in this matter is very simple:
women can either BE THEMSELVES and stand up to who they are and who their husband cherished and decided to marry OR women should shut up and obey their insecure husband.
to each their own but i would rather be happy being single than MISERABLE being married!

what is life without having any FRIENDS?!
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Pweety4me(f): 2:54am On Jun 02, 2011
Smh @ some people!
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by iice(f): 3:29am On Jun 02, 2011
aloy/emeka:

So you'll dump your friends whenever you get married?

Trust you to ignore wetin i talk grin
There will be no difference, marriage or singlehood.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 4:15am On Jun 02, 2011
MRbrownJAY:

^^my view in this matter is very simple:
women can either BE THEMSELVES and stand up to who they are and who their husband cherished and decided to marry OR women should shut up and obey their insecure husband.
to each their own but i would rather be happy being single than MISERABLE being married!

what is life without having any FRIENDS?!



I assume you are male, abi?. Will you divorce your wifey because she objects to your continuous friendship with your female friends?. As a matter of fact, if she objects to your friendship with guys in case you are downlow?.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Nobody: 5:58am On Jun 02, 2011
^^now you are going way off topic, if a man is on the downlow then this is NOT a friendship thats a "dishonest r/ship"(aka cheating) and, therefore, you should sort that out from day one and not simply because you got married.

if a friendship is ok while dating, then that friendship should AUTOMATICALLY be ok in marriage (so long as it doesnt impair that person to raise and care for her/his family).

if my partner/"wife" objects to my friendship to female friends that I ALREADY HAD BEFORE MARRIAGE then i will tell her to sort out whatever insecurities she has (on her own) but will never discredit my friends for her. she should trust me unconditionally (just as i would trust her the same way) and accept me for who i am. . . . . . . . . . . .  as i am dead sure she would have met and known my female friends WAY before marriage.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by noblegas2(m): 6:50am On Jun 02, 2011
MRbrownJAY:

^^now you are going way off topic, if a man is on the downlow then this is NOT a friendship thats a "dishonest r/ship"(aka cheating) and, therefore, you should sort that out from day one and not simply because you got married.

if a friendship is ok while dating, then that friendship should AUTOMATICALLY be ok in marriage (so long as it doesnt impair that person to raise and care for her/his family).

if my partner/"wife" objects to my friendship to female friends that I ALREADY HAD BEFORE MARRIAGE then i will tell her to sort out whatever insecurities she has (on her own) but will never discredit my friends for her. she should trust me unconditionally (just as i would trust her the same way) and accept me for who i am. . . . . . . . . . . . as i am dead sure she would have met and known my female friends WAY before marriage.

Cheap words from a bachelor, I suppose!!!
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 9:49am On Jun 02, 2011
MRbrownJAY:

^^now you are going way off topic, if a man is on the downlow then this is NOT a friendship thats a "dishonest r/ship"(aka cheating) and, therefore, you should sort that out from day one and not simply because you got married.

if a friendship is ok while dating, then that friendship should AUTOMATICALLY be ok in marriage (so long as it doesnt impair that person to raise and care for her/his family).

if my partner/"wife" objects to my friendship to female friends that I ALREADY HAD BEFORE MARRIAGE then i will tell her to sort out whatever insecurities she has (on her own) but will never discredit my friends for her. she should trust me unconditionally (just as i would trust her the same way) and accept me for who i am. . . . . . . . . . . .  as i am dead sure she would have met and known my female friends WAY before marriage.

So one of your girl friends hollared at you and asked you to come over at her business office for a finger food in the evening. She is smoking hot and your face expresses dissatisfaction with such arrangement between a female and her husband, you will tell her to go cure her insecurities, barge through the door and visit your friend?.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by aloyemeka1: 9:51am On Jun 02, 2011
iice:

Trust you to ignore wetin i talk grin
There will be no difference, marriage or singlehood. 

Lol, difference must dey o because he may not like those friends of yours especially the perky one.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by iice(f): 12:29pm On Jun 02, 2011
aloy/emeka:

Lol, difference must dey o because he may not like those friends of yours especially the perky one.
Irrelevant. I am as i am and so should he.
Re: Does Marriage Destroy Friendship?: Vote by Nobody: 8:55pm On Jun 02, 2011
@Noble _gas1
so if someone aint married it automatically means he is a bachelor?! open your mind pls!

@Aloy/ emeka
A) why would i be dissatisified with my woman looking hot?! you are talking to the wrong person here. i have NO INSECURITIES about my woman looking smoking hot (in the contrary). i dont have such insecurities!

B) before going to any "arrangements", get together or whatever , i would ask her what it is about/ for? if i dont like it then i wouldnt even appear BUT if i am there and suddenly dont like this get together (for whatever reasons) then i will express my displeasure to my partner and "try" my hardest to control myself until its over. as soon as we leave this place i would certainly ask her to never bring me to such get together again BUT there is absolutely NO PROBLEMS if she goes there by herself!

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