So, I sat on the same row with a fine girl in church today, and behind me was another fine girl

As much I told myself that I had some basic principles I needed to stick to, a part of me wanted to ask for their numbers.

You wouldn't know Miss Perfect from the color of the eyes or from the shape of the nose.

Normally, I crave for 'natural' beauty and luckily, my church people don't do make up. Both of them were comely and beautiful even without foundations and concealers.

Instantly I mapped out a plan. I'll talk to the one beside me during the service, and 'block' the other one after the service.

As much as I was scouting, I still needed to be blessed during the end of the month service, while waiting for a window of opportunity to shoot my shots.

But there was another problem
What's the right lines to use in church? 'You look familiar' would be a lie and 'Can we talk on phone' would sound too worldly.

So while we stood up to sing the hymn, I 'shifted' closer to the one on my side to share her hymnbook and said 'Hi.' She replied with a smile and assured me we'll talk after church service.

The choir sang and the sermon was delivered with so much charisma and vigor while I jotted relevant points and passages of the scripture.

But then, lucifer came around and I dozed off only to wake up when the preacher asked people to stand up. I was already on my feet before realizing the announcement was for first timers

I and other first timers were led to reserved seats in front while the church clapped. The grace was said, members left and one of the pastors came to talk to the first timers.

By the time he was done, the two fine girls were gone and while I didn't get a chance of collecting their numbers, at least I enjoyed the peanuts and Pepsi that was shared to first timers. And maybe the blessings of attending the service

The pastor or anyone else doesn't know u ?

illicit:
The pastor or anyone else doesn't know u ?

Not a regular

Try dey smoke weed wey you use your hand buy.-sabinus

czarr:
Try dey smoke weed wey you use your hand buy.-sabinus

Stray comment

My rib........Guy, you no well aswear.

God purposely made u dose off because ur mission Na that of adultery.. Next time eat kolanut or bring water to always wash ur face sleep dey show face.

Good story teller

These are the Lions in sheep's clothing we are talking about. Coming to mislead children of God astray.

Good for you.

You no sin.Na where you wan meet your future wife.

I’ve made a decision to restart attending church on the regular. For me it’s because I work and live far from my family, so it’s a way to create new social relationships and connections because I keep to myself too much. This your story has filled me with renewed energy I’ll prolly attend Youth Mass next Thursday

Next time lean close to the girl and whisper: “so I was reading the book of numbers last night and it occured to me I don't have yours”

Nice story

Mercychen:
These are the Lions in sheep's clothing we are talking about. Coming to mislead children of God astray.

Good for you.

Didn't your husband woo you, before you accepted him

KusherAbel:
Next time lean close to the girl and whisper: “so I was reading the book of numbers last night and it occured to me I don't have yours”

Churchy girls are the best to woo. So polite and calm. The ones that begin to tax you asap, just bare in mind the puna is sure, but you see those ones that would invite you to her parents house and give you food to eat, before you will see the colour of her pant alone ehn you will suffer and must have patience

toujurs:
Churchy girls are the best to woo. So polite and calm. The ones that begin to tax you asap, just bare in mind the puna is sure, but you see those ones that would invite you to her parents house and give you food to eat, before you will see the colour of her pant alone ehn you will suffer and must have patience

see 'em! Brother lucifers! Keep chasing pants till you pant to death. Rubbish

You really slept deep gan ooo...
The lady beside you must have been looking at you and wonder if you work in a quarry overnight (for you to have slept that much in a church service).

KusherAbel:
Next time lean close to the girl and whisper: “so I was reading the book of numbers last night and it occured to me I don't have yours”

bad guy

KusherAbel:
Next time lean close to the girl and whisper: “so I was reading the book of numbers last night and it occured to me I don't have yours”

'Son, thou art a legend in the making'

Mercychen:
These are the Lions in sheep's clothing we are talking about. Coming to mislead children of God astray.

Good for you.

Y did u ignore my previous mssg . I knw u did 4 a reason cuz i kmw u.. I wish i could remember ur previous moniker. but i do knw it's a polish word..

Silentgroper:
Y did u ignore my previous mssg . I knw u did 4 a reason cuz i kmw u.. I wish i could remember ur previous moniker. but i do knw it's a polish word..

Bia, how may I help you?

Mercychen:


Bia, how may I help you?

Y do i always find u

btw, that is nt how to say hello to an old friend

Silentgroper:
Y do i always find u

Are you done dragging yourself in the mud with those nairaland rats?

Abeg, swerve!

Mercychen:


Are you done dragging yourself in the mud with those nairaland rats?

Abeg, swerve!

I do not understand u.. .. Who dey drag who nw... .

i knw it's u po*e*n**i

Silentgroper:
I do not understand u.. .. Who dey drag who nw... .

i knw it's u po*e*n**i

Nope.
Calidora.

Mercychen:

Nope. .

I knew it..

I jus knw xay na u..