Criticism is an essential tool for growth in relationships, but becomes a malfunction if taken to the extreme.

I know there is the need for us to be critical with our words, just for the aim of pushing our partner to become a better person or like the next person we secretly admire. According to Psychotherapist and Sex Therapist Caitlyn Cantor "It is what you do with criticism that determines whether it will build closeness or not."

1) Accept your partner’s individuality

This is a significant component of growth, that helps in the smooth sail of a 'ship.' But if your method of achieving growth is by demeaning your partner and comparing them to every Dick, Harry and Jane, you gain nothing. Remember as humans our strength and motivation differ.

Accept your partner’s weakness and strength; do not force them into becoming who they are not, just to fit into your little picture of a perfect person. This has caused a lot of problems in relationships.

2) Correct with love

No one is infallible, we all strive after it. If your partner accept your beliefs and way of life, even if they're very different from theirs, then its time you borrow one or two pages from their book.

The point is, when you blow up, avoid raising your voice, or spitting out words that might hurt them.

3) Guide your partner to become a better person

One of the biggest problem in our (relationship) world today, is that a large percentage of us make the mistake of forcing people we are with into someone they’re not. Rather guide them to become a better version of who they already are.

Your duty is to be your partner’s biggest cheerleader, be sure to feel confident for two, when they feel less about themselves.

4) Create a safe haven

Above all, you’re supposed to be your partner’s safe place, the one person they come to relaxed and forget everything bothering them. Your partner’s utmost desire is to feel safe with you not anxious, intimidated or inadequate.

Finally, accept your partner's flaws with less judgment.