etrange:
Lol... you don't know who behaved childishly, right? It's so difficult to tell who's to blame, right?

When a Nairalander creates a thread asking who's guilty between a man and a woman, just know that the man CLEARLY guilty. When it's truly not clear who's guilty, the normal reaction is to blame everything on the woman. And when the woman is evidently guilty, they drag the entire gender. It's only when a man is guilty that you read questions like "so who is to blame?"

sweetman2022:

Nawa ooo.. I have my own opinion towards the issue but others might not agree with who I chose to blame, that's why the question is thrown open for you to type yours base on the angle you see it.

Richy4:
I don't blame any of them but the economic situation ...

Assuming she can afford a better place after renting Gomorrah unknowingly, she would have moved out and ask the landlord to reimburse her no matter how small he was willing to give ( considering Breach of contract )

Any time you see the girl, let her know that she dodged a bullet

sweetman2022:

Maybe now, she wouldn't have agreed with this when the incident happened. It was a broken heart for her.

You are correct...Just imagine having married to that gentleman, a male boxers that is way bigger than what he used to put on finds it's way inside their home, how will she explain that?

A man and a woman in a relationship should always pause just a little to listen to ' it's not what you think' explanation Even if you don't buy it.. it might be worth it like in this case scenario now..

Helpout12345:
Made up story to invite your fellow misogynist and misandrist to feast on.

And I can see some of them already arriving.

You people no dey tire?

sweetman2022:
This is a true event that happens while I was still a teenager. Please read carefully and be reasonable on whose fault it is.
We moved to an apartment in Lagos years ago where a single storey building turns out to be ridiculous. Have you heard of a house where tenants live upstairs while ashawos live downstairs, that's our house. Till this moment I never cared to ask my parents how they couldn't have noticed that the house is occupied by ashawos quarter on the floor.
Now came the problem, there was a lady living with his younger brother of my age. They occupied a room upstairs with us as neighbors. She has a fiance then which we all knew about, though he has never visited her in her home according to what I heard. She is a nice woman and was very kind to me then. Well I was younger and lovely so I expect nothing other than her kindness towards me.
Although I could remember that when we moved in, my Dad was complaining that the Landlord never told him that the house is being shared with ashawos living on the ground floor while tenants live upstairs. Other tenants like us later told my Dad that they fell into the same circumstances after moving in.
[b]The problem started when this lady's fiance decide to visit her unannounced. [/b]I heard he came through the main entrance which is direct to ashawos quarter. So immediately he entered, they rushed him and was asking to be picked. You can guess the different lines they would have used on him..lolz
He had to run back outside and was surprised. He called the GF to come outside, that he is in her house. She came outside through the other entrance we the tenants normally use. Immediately he saw her, he confirmed she lives there and walks away.
We later heard he claimed so she into prostitution. She tried to explain the situation to him but he never cared to buy it.
He dumped her and move on. It was diverstating to her because we all knew about the incident. In few months time, she moved out of the house with her siblings.
So as a lady, what would you have done differently. And as a guy, would you have acted the same way as the guy?
You can also share your experience if you have lived in such house before.
Lalasticlala you can move it front page for wider view.

sweetman2022:

Why do you guys find some stories as made up. Is it because it is beyond your comprehension? This is not from a third party, I told you I witnessed it with my family where we once lived. I also asked if others have lived in such houses. Please things are happening beyond your understanding. Don't force yourself to understand every incident in the world else you will go crazy aswear.

goodamerican:
She should've told him about her living situation, especially before his visit. Or, she should've waited outside for him to take him through the entrance you tenants use (to prevent him from going into the main entrance/ashawos' entrance). Basically, she has herself to blame for both her lack of communication and carelessness in handling this properly.

At the same time, with the way he dismissed her, he was probably not a patient somebody, else he could've heard her out. Then again, any responsible man looking to settle down wouldn't take this lightly. Because she lived there, I can understand how it would've been difficult for him to believe she wasn't one of them, more so after encounterinh the ashawos. Thus, a good chunk of the blame goes to her. The importance of communication should never be underestimated.

Rozross:
Well, she was supposed to let her fiancée know about the kind of place she lives while trying other places out , don’t they interact? The man acted harshly without hearing her out, if I was the lady, I’ll count my losses and move on, It's part of life, he was never truly hers. Any man who’s quick to anger and hasty decisions will never make a good partner, men with such attitude will never be able to stand the tests of marital life, they are potential home breakers. I will so move on and ignore his existence, it’s not that deep.

goodamerican:
I just reread the post and see I missed the part about him showing up unannounced. When she gave him her address, she should've communicated her living situation to him then, so there wouldn't be any shock factor in case he shows up unannounced like this, so again, she didn't handle this well. He himself should've informed her before visiting but I suppose it was a surprise visit. Both of them get problem o jare...

About him ending the r/ship, he did what he thought was necessary for himself. His decision to end it was likely the combination of him encountering the ashawos and whatever he saw inside their quarter AND due to him having a quick-to-condemn-and-dismiss personality. If they had been dating for some time, then he really should've known what she was and was not capable of, or at least should've given her the chance to explain. Had they gotten married and someone makes a false accusation against her that's how he would've believed that person over her, then either leave her or start mistreating her. This was a relationship that wasn't meant to last or that wouldn't have turned out well had they proceeded into marriage. While she should've communicated her situation before this happened, I'd say he did a favor by ending the relationship.

As for him not knowing where she lived, you did say in your OP that you all knew she had a fiancee. Doesn't that mean he had been over before then, or how did everyone know she had a fiancee if he wasn't known around there? Perhaps he had visited her before but this time he simply decided to show up unannounced, which didn't give her the chance to wait outside for him and take him through the entrance you other tenants use?

Jecci:
These days I always run away from people who are quick to see the worse in others. Never giving room to accommodate the mistakes their partners made in error.
A guy left me like this. All the efforts I made to beg him apologize to him I crawled on my knees countless text messages begging him to forgive me none moved him. What was my offence because I begged him for financial assistance to solve something and he said that I am after his money.
After begging him and begging him trying to convince him that it is because I was in a very tight corner that was why I asked for help. I just let him be that if this kind of issue can make him go blank on me what will happen when bigger challenges comes.
When dealing with people try to give room for ifs