arrangee:
We've been married two years and we live in the U.

chaircover:

The next time she slaps you, give her a big slap back.

arrangee:

We have just finished a serious fight and I think it has gone too far now. Today's own was the worst yet. We've been married two years and we live in the U. She tries all kinds of control methods. I'm not even allowed to get angry or the heavens will come down. She will start shouting and cursing until the neighbours come out or call police. I feel trapped. She was not like this when we dated. Now, trouble is not far from the surface, we simply can't disagree amicable. The cursing and shouting is bad enough but the problem is that it gets physical with pushing and shoving and in her case she adds slaps, punches hitting me with objects etc. In all this I have never done this things to her because I know that I might kill her with one touch. I know, I should walk away, but today I tried but she locked us in and hid the key. I also know you shouldn't get involved in any physicality with a woman but sometimes you just get sucked in by the provocation and antagonism - I really tried to leave today.

This is a terrible habit in our relationship. I'm worried that one day, one slap too many, and I'll end up injuring her in a bad way and maybe jail.I have spoken to her people, they have advised her before. She is sorry and quiet for a month and next thing, one small thing and boom. I don't know what else to do, I have exhausted every avenue - I hate to be a failure but divorce might just save our lives.

chaircover:

^^^^^ you have spoken well and in an ideal world couples should be able to respect each other and amicably agree to disagree.

[size=14pt]In this case, what jumps out at me is the fact that the wife wasnt doing this whist they were dating, so something must have changed since the ring went on the finger. Could it be that she does this because she knows that she can get away with it?[/size]

The poster also said that he does try to remove himself from the situation but she locked the door. Its like she is almost telling her husband " what can you do"?

If she is allowed ot carry on like this, What if in her anger one day she ends up hittng him with something heavy and God forbid, he slumps he dies? Spousal abuse is bad and dangerous regardless of whether it is the husband or wife at the receiving end and something should be done before it is too late.

I EMBOLDENED that comment of yours for MORE EMPHASIS! You reasoned well too! Something still tells me the OP has not given us the full story of what ACTUALLY went wrong! In some cases like this, the husband is usually the cause and when the WIFE reacts, she tends to OVER REACT! I'm not saying that's the case here but i cant explain like you said, how things will suddenly turn BAD immediately after they got married! I'll also like to go with your line of reasoning that says that the woman KNOWS she can get away with HER ATTITUDE! SOMETHING IS DEFINITELY AMISS!
Also not saying that may be the case here, BUT sometimes, when people are in the WRONG, they tend to look for SUPPORTERS to back up what they feel should be done! Could it be the OP distorted the story to suit him, so that sympathizers would tell him to GO AHEAD AND DIVORCE THAT WOMAN THAT WANTS TO KILL YOU? I'm sorry if i'm not making sense but i still think there's a MISSING PIECE to THIS PUZZLE!

Johndoe100:

@OP
I fear that you have to get rid of the woman. You can try and call her bluff by slapping her back, to see if she will come to her senses, I think you need to free yourself from her

tunnytox:

Is your marriage an arrangee one? cos if that is the case please keep enjoying your suffering at least you'll get your green card in the end. pele

jennykadry:

OP please don't listen to people telling you to leave your wife. They are all internet kids. Hold onto your wife.

arrangee:

@Sisi_kill

You must have known she was a beater when you married her.
I did not know, if I had, I would not have dated her never mind marrying her.

Did you marry her thinking you can change her?

I had no plans of changing her - surely it is possible to disagree in a civil manner

Do some self examination. . . What do you to make her angry?
Any thing -

Stop doing those things because you have to remember she's human.
Would I also be human if I started slapping her around and beating her up?

Start talking to her gently and try be nice to her.
This does not work when she is angry -

Don't deny her sex and NEVER EVER. . . EVER stop praying God will change her heart.
Sex ke - that's the last thing that is going to be happening for a while,
God is always in control.