Hello Folks,
I am a young man in my mid-twenties, I am a student of a prestigious school in Nigeria, I am a christian and I believe that I am Godly, I have a strict christian background which never allows me to be a wayward person. Don't lemme bore you about myself,

I met a young lady in my first year in Univerisity, this is a lady you can ever prayed for, she is humble, intelligent, brillant and above all Godly just as I am brought up, however, I made a proposal to her that I want to date her, before that we have being friends, I mean a very close one, she tells me about her boyfriend that she was dating in Lagos before coming to school, and sometimes, I will joke with her I will be the one who will marry her at last, I noticed that I am getting too emotionally attached to her than I can control thats why I made up made to my mind to ask her out; Now the issuse is that she said;
1. She likes me but she dont know how to go about dating me, she told me that her mind was not in.( This is after serveal talks and calls)
2. Her parents are not in support of her relationship with this guys cos of his background (Muslim) even though he is a christian.
3.She said she is kinda confused cos she didnt know what to do.

Now, I am asking this honorable house what can I do to win her love?, Should her respect her opinion on this guys' cos it seems they are deep in it, should I let go even though a day can not pass with me calling, texting or flashing her, so you can know how deep I am, Also, i need your advice on what to do on me and her as well.

I am sorry if my message is somehow, pls pardon me I am not used to all these speech writing, but I guess you all get what I am pushing at.

Thanks in anticipation.

saints_1:

Hello Folks,
I am a young man in my mid-twenties, I am a student of a prestigious school in Nigeria, I am a christian and I believe that I am Godly, I have a strict christian background which never allows me to be a wayward person. Don't lemme bore you about myself,

I met a young lady in my first year in Univerisity, this is a lady you can ever prayed for, she is humble, intelligent, brillant and above all Godly just as I am brought up, however, I made a proposal to her that I want to date her, before that we have being friends, I mean a very close one, she tells me about her boyfriend that she was dating in Lagos before coming to school, and sometimes, I will joke with her I will be the one who will marry her at last, I noticed that I am getting too emotionally attached to her than I can control thats why I made up made to my mind to ask her out; Now the issuse is that she said;
1. She likes me but she dont know how to go about dating me, she told me that her mind was not in.( This is after serveal talks and calls)
2. Her parents are not in support of her relationship with this guys cos of his background (Muslim) even though he is a christian.
3.She said she is kinda confused cos she didnt know what to do.

Now, I am asking this honorable house what can I do to win her love?, Should her respect her opinion on this guys' cos it seems they are deep in it, should I let go even though a day can not pass with me calling, texting or flashing her, so you can know how deep I am, Also, i need your advice on what to do on me and her as well.

I am sorry if my message is somehow, pls pardon me I am not used to all these speech writing, but I guess you all get what I am pushing at.

Thanks in anticipation.

cldnt help but laff!

back to topic, does it mean she is still dating the other guy in lagos? if yes, then she would have to make up her mind on who amongst you guys she prefers.

@ OP, well as long as she is not married to the guy and you really like her, maybe she likes you too go for it.

and op i don't know why we need to know you are in a prestigious Nigerian university maybe its just me but that information seems irrelevant.

^^^^^ 

OP, i think u may consider respecting the girls opinion. but you can give asking her out a try. just don't over do

Just ask what she really wants and you'll have your opinion
lol Andromida, maybe poster wanted to show he is able to handle the lady

andromida:

@ OP, well as long as she is not married to the guy and you really like her, maybe she likes you too go for it.

ll

Hello guys, Thanks for your quick answers, I appreciate you all, but this lady is very discipline (one reason I love her though), i have talked about it as well that since they are not married, it is not a crime to double date, she called me yesternight and we talked to 2 hours, she told me that not that she was not in with me but she was confused as the other guy was dear to her as well I too. Now I am asking what can I do to win her over, what tips can I apply on her, I have never dated anyone before, she will be my first girl I have told so.

Pls help me out!

Saints " it is not a crime to double date" technically you're right but for moral it's quite different
Then if you think you can have a chance to be with her so fight for her ( figurative sens of course)

Nayah:

Saints " it is not a crime to double date" technically you're right but for moral it's quite different
Then if you think you can have a chance to be with her so fight for her ( figurative sens of course)

Thanks Nayah, I appreciate your comment, other advice are welcome please, No one knows it all.

Thanks

Don't be too loud on her. Ok what I mean is,dont like 'gate crush'. Hang around be the best friend to her and allow the other relationship to fizzle out silently. ie if it does.
Do not be aggressive and force her to drop the dude. Do not even try talking ill of that other dude in an effort to cut it off.
She will start comparing the 2 and eventually make up her mind. Excuse her for the confusion cz its not easy to decide btwn 2 guys.
Good news is this.You have already declared your intentions,made a mark and she is aware.Her heart may start warming up to you and she will start confiding in you.
Always give her a listening ear when she shares stuff.It works like magic.
It takes time just be patient bro.

@pendo89. Thanks girl, Nice one, Nice one, Thanks, I am grateful, More ideas pls.

Thanks.

Though yhu may find this hard to take man. Don't get deceived by others telling yhu to fight for her and if she truly loves yhu she will comply. The simple thing behind this whole issue is that yhu have fallen with the wrong person. Even if she is the right person (Because we never can tell what the future holds for us), then you have fallen at the wrong time. Put yhurself in the shoes of the supposed guy she told yhu about that she is already dating. She made it clear to yhu that she still loves the guy. If yhu were to be that guy, and another person is telling yhur gf to abandon yhu for them for some reasons, how will yhu feel? No offense man, LET GO. You'll be glad yhu did. Believe me.

Emmagency:

Though yhu may find this hard to take man. Don't get deceived by others telling yhu to fight for her and if she truly loves yhu she will comply. The simple thing behind this whole issue is that yhu have fallen with the wrong person. Even if she is the right person (Because we never can tell what the future holds for us), then you have fallen at the wrong time. Put yhurself in the shoes of the supposed guy she told yhu about that she is already dating. She made it clear to yhu that she still loves the guy. If yhu were to be that guy, and another person is telling yhur gf to abandon yhu for them for some reasons, how will yhu feel? No offense man, LET GO. You'll be glad yhu did. Believe me.

Hello Man, Thanks for your advice, yeap, I have asked her if I should back-out of the affairs, she told me that she is confused that we both should pray about it, I later asked her to tell someone older than her if they might give her reasons, she did and she asked her aunty and her aunty also told her to pray if any one of us is God's will let it stand.

Yesterday she asked me what she should do but am just as confused as she is, cos i dont want to talk ill of the other dude so that she wont think am jealous or beefing or that stuff, but all the same, Its well noted.

I thank you all guys, pls let more ideas flow in.

Thanks.

There is nothing wrong with having multiple dates however if you are having sex with each of the dates then it could lead to problems.

Platonic dating is the best thing when searching for someone long term wise. If you are just casually dating and has not expectation on settling for one girl then I say make sure those girls are on board with it too because you are playing a dangerous game involving emotions and feelings.

Mrs.Chima:

There is nothing wrong with having multiple dates however if you are Being Intimate with each of the dates then it could lead to problems.

Platonic dating is the best thing when searching for someone long term wise. If you are just casually dating and has not expectation on settling for one girl then I say make sure those girls are on board with it too because you are playing a dangerous game involving emotions and feelings.

Hey,
I am not having mutiple datings as it were, I will say this is my 1st date ever since, cos I am being careful with ladies and this time, I saw all the uniqueness of maturity in her, I first thought she was pretending until I got to know her better, we have being friends for 7 months before i finally make a proposal. I am not toying with her emotions which she is aware of, we talked alot and we are very close.

Thanks Mrs. Chima, your suggestions is well noted, Let more ideas come pls.

Thanks.

saints_1:

Hello Man, Thanks for your advice, yeap, I have asked her if I should back-out of the affairs, she told me that she is confused that we both should pray about it, I later asked her to tell someone older than her if they might give her reasons, she did and she asked her aunty and her aunty also told her to pray if any one of us is God's will let it stand.

Yesterday she asked me what she should do but am just as confused as she is, cos i dont want to talk ill of the other dude so that she wont think am jealous or beefing or that stuff, but all the same, Its well noted.

I thank you all guys, pls let more ideas flow in.

Thanks.

i like praying you know but in this instance just use your head. Keep it simple and platonic, you have already told her you love her check on her now and then take her out on dates, call her and avoid being sidelined in the friend avenue also have timeframe within which if she does not agree to date you, you must move on.

saints_1:

Hello Man, Thanks for your advice, yeap, I have asked her if I should back-out of the affairs, she told me that she is confused that  we both should pray about it, I later asked her to tell someone older than her if they might give her reasons, she did and she asked her aunty and her aunty also told her to pray if any one of us is God's will let it stand.

Yesterday she asked me what she should do but am just as confused as she is, cos i dont want to talk ill of the other dude so that she wont think am jealous or beefing or that stuff, but all the same, Its well noted.

I thank you all guys, pls let more ideas flow in.

Thanks.

The thing is that yhu just have to chose as soon as yhu can. Summon courage and ask her. If she think she would be happy with yhu, If yes, then tell her to find a way and end the other relationship. Yhur idea of not talking ill about the other dude shows enough maturity and uniqueness of yhur love for her unlike other guys would do. Tell her to make a decision because it is killing yhu man. Come On!

op
just try ur best & fu-ck her

Then she will be yours 4 life

GOODLUCK boy

andromida:

i like praying you know but in this instance just use your head. Keep it simple and platonic, you have already told her you love her check on her now and then take her out on dates, call her and avoid being sidelined in the friend avenue also have timeframe within which if she does not agree to date you, you must move on.

Thanks, wonderful advice going on here, thanks alot, but pls can you guys help me out, I can't do without calling her a day, is either I call or text or flash her, even when I don't want to, I just can't help it, she also is doing the same, she calls at least 2-3 times a week or we have a midnight call for almost 1-2hrs, Is it normal or should I stop all these?

@Andromida, thanks again for your advice

Emmagency:

The thing is that yhu just have to chose as soon as yhu can. Summon courage and ask her. If she think she would be happy with yhu, If yes, then tell her to find a way and end the other relationship. Yhur idea of not talking ill about the other dude shows enough maturity and uniqueness of yhur love for her unlike other guys would do. Tell her to make a decision because it is killing yhu man. Come On!

OK, Thanks man, Its well noted,

More Pls.

@op There are so many fished fishes in the river.the lady is already in in relationship.And u want to snatch someelse's girlfriend.How would you feel if same is done to you.Remember you are still in school.Soon you guys would part during Nysc and she will meet someone again.
Except you won chop kpekus,clean mouth.I would advise you stop getting romantically/emotionally involbved with that lady.

stepo707:

@op There are so many fished fishes in the river.the lady is already in in relationship.And u want to snatch someelse's girlfriend.How would you feel if same is done to you.Remember you are still in school.Soon you guys would part during Nysc and she will meet someone again.
Except you won chop kpekus,clean mouth.I would advise you stop getting romantically/emotionally involbved with that lady.

Thanks man, I understand what you meant really, I understand, I wish i can let go but I can't. She once asked me if I am serious with her which I told her my mind but all the same I got your point, Thnaks alot man for your time, Its well noted.

More Pls,

you've made your intentions known to her, just be patient with her. Don't force it, time will tell eventually.

P.S Don't be too nice and caring. I make it a point to avoid guys like that.

Amya:

you've made your intentions known to her, just be patient with her. Don't force it, time will tell eventually.

P.S Don't be too nice and caring. I make it a point to avoid guys like that.

@ Amya why is that?

Amya:

you've made your intentions known to her, just be patient with her. Don't force it, time will tell eventually.

P.S Don't be too nice and caring. I make it a point to avoid guys like that.

Pls can you explain that aspect pls? I don't get it,

So na u dey disturb my gf, e don be for u

saints an 'extremely' nice guy can be a complete turn off than turn on. Mr.nice ie.

You can be nice but tough and a bit rough not the over caring ,overprotective kind. gosh i hope you understand what am trying to say.

Dont be be like johny bravo

kpolli:

So na u dey disturb my gf, e don be for u

LOL, Oga no vex,

pendo89:

saints an 'extremely' nice guy can be a complete turn off than turn on. Mr.nice ie.

You can be nice but tough and a bit rough not the over caring ,overprotective kind. gosh i hope you understand what am trying to say.

Dont be be like johny bravo

OK, I gat you.

Thanks.

I bliv in sharing, so i wud take monday, wednesday, friday n saturday. . . u can take the remaining days . . . n pls use protection, i like skin diving

kpolli:

I bliv in sharing, so i wud take monday, wednesday, friday n saturday. . . u can take the remaining days . . . n pls use protection, i like skin diving

guy it has not reached that level abeg lol

Hmmm, After All being said and done, I will want to thank all those that have replied so far, you made my day, I am grateful to all, God bless and uphold you all, May you be a blessing to your generation, All ideas and suggestions are well noted and will be taken care of.

Once again with all humility within me I say a very big thank you and God bless you all.

See you guys soon.

Goodbye folks.