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Lessons From Hakim's Actions - Family - Nairaland

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Lessons From Hakim's Actions by IyaTola: 2:19pm On Apr 16, 2023
I will tell u a short story -

Sometime last year a family I know got into brouhaha and I will state this - just because the husband wanted out of a marriage where HE has been controlling his wife since they got married. His mum wasn't an exception either as she is a typical Nigerian woman who was battered by her own husband and ALLOWS her son/children to continue to tow in abusive line to their spouse/significant other!

The woman in question - left a well paying Jon to join her husband in the South after getting married but that was the beginning of her end. Slowly but surely he started keeping away her from her friends, became controlling of her, financially as she had to depend on him especially because where they lived had no job prospects as where she left.

Fast forward when they had baby - his mum was verbally and mentally abusive, said all sort of things because baby was via CS... ETC. On moving abroad, the financial abuse became even worse - he says she can only spend about 40 on food - don't turn heating on, don't watch TV (although he claimed this was gotten for her and their kids) - Please note she had previously lived abroad before going back to get married to him. She encouraged him moving her because he's a doc. He git here, saw the life and film lifestyle changed.

Wetin Abu eye no see for gate! He would compare her to his SIL but when she tried getting job he wouldn't give dime for her travels.

One day, after abt 3 yrs in abroad he took her phone away so no form of communication- she in turn gave him sim card because he paid for it. Then she communicated with her sib during which she stated she wld rather die than be in the situation she was in -which prompted sis to ask her to come to hers.

Guy calls sis and blames sis for taking her away even though the woman explained the reason behind it. Turns out this guys is a narcissist who wants to control. The guy shared her sis no with his mum - this woman then decides because she wants to speak to DIL n grandkids o she had the right to just call dils sis on a wkday by video call during working hours. When the girls sis responded the woman tells her son that the girl was rude and wanted an apology!

This girl finally gets a job that pays a lot and was able to afford things that's how the husband became jealous as she's not been repressed anymore.

That's how they had another fight and he let me state again HE calls the police on her stating that she was driving without license (which is true buy he had also bought her a car which she drove without license earlier in the year) and he was worried about her because she was taking some drugs which is no longer in her drug compartment. He gave the police her number, plate number and continued his day as if nothing happened!

As God will have it when police reached the girl, she was asked to come to the station and given a warning but asked if she knew why her husband will do such - that's when she told them about the DV she had suffered (controlling, emotional, financial, verbal and physical, manipulated, gaslit) that night police went and picked him up and he slept in jail! Did you think she would have told the police abt this issues? No but the husband himself wanted her to suffer because that day after calling the police and when she didn't return home, he picked up their kids, turned alarm on as if she wasn't getting back home!

What was even more surprising is he ended up telling his family he was worried about her but actually never called her own family before ringing the police. His mother has not been in contact since this happened, well shes already said she isnt her daughter but again the girl doesnt give her anything like the other girl. His own brother also drove years without license- such hypocrisy.

So the point now is - I'm telling u this story because I know the story and I know the boy is a narcissist who after realising he couldn't control her anymore, let me discard her whilst discrediting her.

Just be careful of the stories you choose to hear or listen to, when someone absolves themselves of blame - smthing us wrong. Question them because there are manipulative ppl our there

May we not become diary of a mad black woman because many nigerian woman have suffered and are still suffering due to the patriarchal nature of the society and the women who actually also harbour this! His mum suffered humiliation etc with his own father and she's also with her full chest hen! baba e lo Jo! imagine
Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Nobody: 2:24pm On Apr 16, 2023
[quote author=IyaTola post=122551589][/quote]

How does this relate to hakimi?

2 Likes

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Rubyjade: 3:09pm On Apr 16, 2023
Which Mumu lesson

2 Likes

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Janesouthall: 3:13pm On Apr 16, 2023
Iyatola you are a full ( fool) how this story episode way you write take relate to hakimi case??

4 Likes

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by IyaTola: 12:11pm On Apr 17, 2023
WAKA
Janesouthall:
Iyatola you are a full ( fool) how this story episode way you write take relate to hakimi case??
Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Janesouthall: 2:09pm On Apr 17, 2023
IyaTola:
WAKA

SHEGE....talking out of point...

2 Likes

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Foodqueen(f): 3:34pm On Apr 17, 2023
U don come here again with this copy copy story.

1 Like

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Janesouthall: 5:28pm On Apr 17, 2023
Foodqueen:
U don come here again with this copy copy story.

No mind the idiot called iyatola

1 Like

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by IyaTola: 9:31pm On Apr 17, 2023
Janesouthall:


No mind the idiot called iyatola
In a bid to make a point you insult yourself.
Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Janesouthall: 12:04am On Apr 18, 2023
IyaTola:
In a bid to make a point you insult yourself.

In a bid to talk rubbish all in the name of hakimi...you insulted yourself

2 Likes

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by Kingsmm55: 2:42am On Apr 18, 2023
U dey smoke igbooooo

1 Like

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by IyaTola: 8:03am On Apr 18, 2023
undecided
Janesouthall:


In a bid to talk rubbish all in the name of hakimi...you insulted yourself
Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by ahnie: 8:48am On Apr 18, 2023
Gba gbos everywhere.

Topic inconsequentially irrelevant
DOA

2 Likes

Re: Lessons From Hakim's Actions by IyaTola: 5:02pm On Apr 18, 2023
angry
ahnie:
Gba gbos everywhere.

Topic inconsequentially irrelevant
DOA

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