My Regrets And Guilt

Years ago, I went to a certain boulevard in my home city and met a girl. I called her and told her I was looking for someone. She brought to me the person I was looking for and I left. For almost four years we never saw each other again.

During the fourth year, I finally relocated to the boulevard and saw her again. Her name was Praise. Within these period of four, Praise was 17 years and has grown up to be a fine endow young woman. She saw me and still recognize me. Praise became my first female friend in this new boulevard because I needed to mingle and connect to the area.

Every night I will visit Praise, sat down with her and sing love song for her. She would laugh as I sing for her. I saw her as just a friend but she was deeply in love 💓 with me.

Her mother started seeing me with her daughter every night talking and gisting. The mother really seem to like me a lot because I am nice. The woman felt her daughter picked a calm good guy 👱

I never truly knew how deep I hurt Praise - not until now that I do more better. I was her first man, but truth be told, I never truly deserve Praise in my life because of the way I treated her. Lesson Learned. You never truly know the value of something special until you loss it

I was cool with Praise but I felt she was not beautiful enough for me. I wanted someone perfect. I wanted someone top notch that will match my person and boost my foolish pride.
Lesson Learned. Never look at just the outward beauty when choosing a woman.

Praise started coming to see me in my place. Like I said before, I never truly loved Praise but I was her first love.

My enemies - the devil's knew this young woman was an obstacle to their plans. The enemies cannot used Praise against me. They can't manipulate her because they have no power over her love. Lesson Learned As a good man, marry or date a woman with a pure spirit. A woman with wealth of love.

In order for spiritual enemies to get me, they brought her sister known as Gift to come around and entice me. My eyes 👀 instantly started entering Gift. In fact, I was love 💘 struck with Gift. My new acquaintance Gift was also eyeing 👁👁 me and enjoying my attention. I then asked her out 🍹🍸and she happily said YES.

This her sister was extremely more beautiful than her. I felt Gift was my perfect match👌. I felt Gift was my missing rib . Gift has all the natural attraction any man on earth will want in a woman. The enemies used the beauty queen called Gift to enticed my head and manipulate my life.

This new beauty queen 👸 became a time bomb💣. She was a massive disaster 💥 to me in all aspect of my life. She is one of my life greatest regret. She used her personality to caused me so much trouble and financial loss.
Lesson Learned. If you are a Godly man, seek God help when choosing a woman. Or marry a benevolent night owl.

I left Praise who so much love me and run after her sister Gift. She was so heart broken 💔 and cried quietly. Praise felt pained and almost fought her sister for taking me - the foolish guy away from her.

Even Praise mother was not happy with me how I left her innocent daughter broken. No, I was blinded by the charming beauty of another. Lesson Learned. Women that glitters are not gold. Most or 95% of beautiful women are terrible in all aspect in relationship.

Even after I left Gift, she still wanted me back. Praise herself wanted me back. But I never truly gave Praise the chance to be with me. At the end, I was and I am still full of regret over my past blindness. I would have dodge many bullet if I had not blindly left Praise for Gift. I paid dearly for my past sin.
Lesson Learned As a man, marry or date a woman that unconditionally loves you more than you love her.

Two days ago I did search for Praise on facebook and found her. I looked at her wide smile and slowly turn my face away. I have come to realized how much I truly hurt and missed this beautiful woman. I longingly desire to apologize to Praise over my past deed - how I broke her heart 💔

I always feel guilt thinking of Praise. I don't know if she is married. I though about contacting Praise and apologize to her. I want to remorsefully show her some high level of financial kindness.

📝

There is nothing wrong to apologize if you believe you hurt her. But it will heal you as well. Apologies help us put the conflict behind us and move on more easily.

Lostchild:


Should I contact her and apologize to her?

Is it OK if I apologize and show her some level of financial kindness?

Very touching story. In my opinion, for the Regrets, as relating to your actions with the sister, you have learnt your lessons already. You can move on from that.

For the Guilt however, apology is the appropriate way to deal with it. Apologize to her for not loving her back the way you knew she did and also apologize for the way you behaved towards her sister in light of the relationship.

And YES, if you are up to it, assist her financially. She desreve that level of kindness at least from you. In fact, what you had written above explaining that you did not really love her should be explained to her so she knows it has nothing to do with her as a person but your own feelings towards her. Let her understand that things may not have ended with you guys in the way expected, but knowing she is fine and doing okey will give you peace even if you don't have to be her friend.

This is very crucial so this time around, she doesn't mistake your kind gesture as meaning you want to get back to her. A letter/WhatsApp written to her will be the best approach since hearing you on phone may put her off.

By the way, I hope your plan is not to restart a relationship with her?. Let us know how it went. Thanks.

How many years have you people been separated?..
do you think she haven't taste other dicks?
first hand love and second hand love are not the same..
try your possible best to convince her but don't over play your roles or you let her go if she's adamant on leaving, all the same you'll be fine with time..
I was once in ur shoes..

juri:


Very touching story. In my opinion, for the Regrets, as relating to your actions with the sister, you have learnt your lessons already. You can move on from that.

For the Guilt however, apology is the appropriate way to deal with it. Apologize to her for not loving her back the way you knew she did and also apologize for the way you behaved towards her sister in light of the relationship.

And YES, if you are up to it, assist her financially. She desreve that level of kindness at least from you. In fact, what you had written above explaining that you did not really love her should be explained to her so she knows it has nothing to do with her as a person but your own feelings towards her. Let her understand that things may not have ended with you guys in the way expected, but knowing she is fine and doing okey will give you peace even if you don't have to be her friend.

This is very crucial so this time around, she doesn't mistake your kind gesture as meaning you want to get back to her. A letter/WhatsApp written to her will be the best approach since hearing you on phone may put her off.

By the way, I hope your plan is not to restart a relationship with her?. Let us know how it went. Thanks.

When something is burdening me, I will see the need to write it out here on nairaland. My past mistake, my regrets, my guilts and the urge to connect to my former friend just to apologize to her in kindness and make her feel special again. 💐💎🎁

Anyway, thanks for for your wonderful input and for the advice. Yes, I will update you guys how it went

Thanks once more again.. 👋

Hemeshemeheru:
There is nothing wrong to apologize if you believe you hurt her. But it will heal you as well. Apologies help us put the conflict behind us and move on more easily.

Thanks