List Of Common Nigerian Insults, How many can you relate with?

‘e no good for ya mama grandmama!
“Aradite”
“Fish brain”
“Mmiri nshi”
“Ur head is missing a few nuts!”
“Ur mama didnt raise u right!”
“You are the reason I support abortion”
“Your mouth isn’t connected to your brain”
“Your silly, very silly in fact you stupidity is beyond compartmentality”
”na toto water full ur head”
”ur father is a gay-lord”
”ur father is a prostitute/stripper”
”ur mother is a virgin”

America dustbin
Anfaani adugbo (local shared utility)
Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today

Ba3tard son of a thousand fathers.
Beast of no nation!
Before you came along we were hungry. Now we are fed up.
Big stupid slow bufoon
Bombarstic element.
Boncon
Bonga head
Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.
Brains aren’t everything, in fact in your case they’re nothing
Broke goat
Bunkum

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
Can I buy you a drink?
Can I buy you a drink?
Can I have your name?
Can I spend the evening with you?
Certainly – try those people over there.
Comcombility!

Dan bura uba’!
Did they mix craze with the garri to make eba for you?
Do you mind if I smoke?
Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
Don’t let you mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own
Don’t you need a license to be that ugly?

Even fools marvel at your foolishness
Every girl has the right to be ugly, but you abused the privilege.

Folk clap when they see you, but they clap their hands over their eyes.

Get ur brain formatted
God punish you, iggiot!!!

Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?
Have you got a problem with that?
He doesn’t know the meaning of the word “Fear” – but then again he doesn’t know the meaning of most words
He is the kind of a man that you could use as a blueprint to build an idiot.
He’s not stupid; he’s possessed by a slow ghost.
Hey friend remember dat without stupidity there can be no wisdom & without ugliness there can be no beauty, so the world needs you after all!

I don’t care if you burn.
I don’t know what makes you so dumb but it really works
I don’t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
I gave up baby-sitting years ago.
I heard that you were a ladykiller. They take one look at you and die of shock.
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
I know your secret – I work at the clinic.
I never forget a face.
I see the wheel is spinning, but the hamster looks dead.
I think the sun shines out of your arse.
I thought of you all day today. I was at the zoo.
I would think so – why don’t you ask the bartender?
I’d have said it was more like an amusement park.
I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
I’d like to leave you with one thought, but I’m not sure you have anywhere to put it!
I’d like to marry you.
I’d like to see more of you.
I’d like to see things from your point of view but I can’t seem to get my head that far up my ass.
I’d love to ask how old you are, but unfortunately I know you can’t count that high.
I’d love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on tv.
I’d rather just have the cash.
I’d rather skip straight towards the divorce.
I’ll never forget the first time we met – although I’ll keep trying.
I’m busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
I’m not sure I’ve even noticed you yet.
I’m not thirsty.
I’m sure I could turn you on.
I’m sure I’ve noticed you before.
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.
If you had another brain, it would be lonely.
If you put your face by a door, no one would ever come in
If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
If you were my dog, I’d shave your butt and teach you to walk backwards.
If your face had “Welcome” written on it, it would make a perfect doormat
Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?
Iya eh

Just give me the cash – I’ll get one later.

Keep talking, someday you’ll say something intelligent.
Kiss me and I’ll tell you a secret.
Koni dafun baba eh
Konkoorbility

Let’s be honest with each other . . . We’ve both come here for the same reasons.
Listen, are you always this stupid or are you just making a special effort today?
Look at you.
Looking like an ant that did abortion.
May I introduce myself?
Most foolish person in west africa
Mumu
My body’s like a temple.

Neither do I, but in your case I’ll make an exception.
Next time you shave, try standing an inch or two closer to the blade.
No, it’s a gun.
No, only with you.
Nonsense and ingredients!

Ode
Olodo (block head)
Oloshi

Pardon me, but you’ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
Please, close your mouth and open your brain

Shall we go all the way?
Shall we go to your place or mine?
So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.
Some wires aren’t connecting in your brain
Someone said that you are not fit to sleep with pigs. I stuck up for the pigs.
Stay a minute and let me get you a drink.
Swegbe

That’s right – I won’t go anywhere near you.
The only thing positive about you is your hiv status…Damn !
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
There isn’t any more of me.
Thunder faya your nyash
Thunder fire you

U invented foolishness, ur folly is android 10.10 coconut head
Ur an apology from the condom company
Ur foolishness is imported

Waka
Well, you’re living proof that even a turd can be polished.
Were you conceived on the highway? That’s where most accidents happen
What do you mean – I wasn’t even born for the first half of it.
When can we be alone?
When should I phone you?
When we’re not with each other.
Whenever I’m not there.
Where have you been all my life?
Why – haven’t you already got one?
Why don’t you slip into something more comfortable, like a coma.
Women say I have the gift of the gab.
Would you like to come for a drink with me next week?
Wrap it up, then.

Ya mama tumbeleku!
Yes, as long as it’s in different directions.
Yes, you’re right. Let’s go and pull some girls.
You couldn’t even turn on a radio.
You dey craze
You dey mad..
You dey mad?? Abi you dey craze??
You get kro-kro for nyash…One part of your nyash dey cover river niger!
You got a face only a mother could love, unfortunately she too hates it!
You have a lot of well-wishers. They would all like to throw you down one.
You must have been dropped on the head as a baby
You seem to me like a sensible girl.
You this snake of the monkey shadow!
You’ve got an iq of 2. Pity it takes 3 to grunt.
Your face doesn’t look like a doorstep, it looks like the door just kept going
Your face is absolutely perfect, so is yours . . . For radio.
Your face is such a mess, when you practice diving why don’t you make sure the pool has water in next time.
Your face is such a mess, why don’t you get your dog something different to chew on ?
Your face is such a mess, you must stop using it to hammer in nails
Your face is such a mess, you should stop reading before slamming the book shut
Your face looks like you’ve been using it as a doorstop
Your face would not only stop a door, but also most clocks and a herd of charging buffalo
Your father
Your girlfriend is so old that her breastmilk is powdered.
Your iife needs complete teardown and rebuilding
Your lucky to be born beautiful, unlike me, who was born to be a big liar.
Your mama no born you well.
Your medula oblongata is suffering from peri-pay-sue
Your so narrow minded when you walk your earings knock together.

Many of these don't even sound Nigerian.....