| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by AtoningBlood(m): 2:27pm On Jan 25 |
. 2 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by AtoningBlood(m): 2:28pm On Jan 25 |
. 3 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by DenreleDave(m): 6:46pm On Jan 25 |
AtoningBlood:
The money is long gone.
He started asking for money months after selling the house. If i were you, I won't give him a dime after selling the house in just a few months 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by DenreleDave(m): 6:46pm On Jan 25 |
AtoningBlood:
Thanks, I have decided on what to do. Thanks to everyone who gave meaningful thoughts. So what did u decide? Share with us 2 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Konquest: 11:52pm On Jan 25 |
Klass99:
Tell him to sell the village house, like he did the town house and rent a 3 bedroom apartment.
You pay the piper (meaning you do the heavy financial lifting) yet you are allowing him dictate to you what kind of house to get. Can you not act like your siblings even a little to force him to adjust his attitude and expectations?
If I were you, I will not rent him a new place, he will stay in that village house where close to N2 million was spent installing solar power. You will continue to renew his rent each year if you let him leave the villa, do you have the means to sustain that? You go taya o!
Renting when he owns a house in the villa is not a wise use of money. A good father leaves an inheritance for his children's children, what is your own father doing? Financially wrecking you, like you rightly said.
Modified to add; You are too old to care and too old to be worrying about what your cousins will say or do. Screw them! Their opinions should be the least of your concerns, the preservation, wise use and multiplication of your resources should be your priority, or don't you have children of your own to take care of and plan for?
"Screw them?"... That was a low blow from you... Lol Klass99, you made near-absolute points in your entire post. Have a great year (2024) ahead. Cheers! |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Konquest: 12:12am On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Hi! From the description you have of your retiree dad, I suspect he may be experiencing early to mid stages of Parkinson's or some other neurological disorder. What I mean is that his constant fighting or quarrels with folks in the village (due to irritability), second, the sale of his house without informing you his children, third, your inability to locate your late mother's property kept in the original house that he sold, fourth your father's ABRUPT plan to relocate back to the city after a lot has been spent on the village house, fifth, the CONSTANT revealing of family secrets by your father to people which have led to the alleged disrespect for your father by folks are some of the things you and your siblings have to become aware of. Sixth, his inability to keep or spend large amounts of money judiciously. Read up on Parkinson's symptoms (there are over 30 symptoms or side effects) to get a hang of what I'm saying here. Get him to see a professional neurologist for major checkups to determine what is wrong with him... and primarily watch if he has tremors in his hands or a shuffling gait while walking. Forgetfulness is another major symptom. CBD oil is a potent patented medication that helps to relieve the neurological symptoms. There are drugs or medications to stabilize a patient, but under normal conditions, the gradual damage to the brain nerves (due to stem cells deterioration) are irreversible. Research is still going on worldwide though to find a lasting cure for Parkinson's which can strike from about the age of 35 years and above. I must commend you for looking out for your dad... That is very noble of you. In the process, you will also learn about yourself and how to give love and vice versa. Now that you know these, please be PATIENT with him from here on out because it's much deeper, though it can be annoying and embarrassing when a loved one doesn't keep secrets, missplaces things, and is forgetful atimes. These are classic symptoms of Parkinson's disease. A lot of folks have given brilliant advice here and I also do NOT subscribe to you renting a house for him. At his age, he should be in his own house and not have to start paying rent to a landlord. Last but not least, in the absence of stock market investments and/or mutual funds, the recommended investment for retirees is in the field of agronomy as that would bring in sustainable income and they can also feed themselves instead of depending exclusively on others. They can have hybrid economic trees planted such as avocado and others which yearly produce fruits, hybrid tomatoes and red/yellow peppers, pineapples, etc. these can sustain them and the excess can be sold at a farmers market. Hope this helps. Cheers! 7 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by armyofone(m): 12:43am On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Tell him you rented 1 or 2 bedrooms apartment for him. He should pick one as soon as possible before someone grab it. Rent for him. Don't start or do what your mind is against because you will be in bigger headache. 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by akube34: 1:24am On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
My story is long, please read and advise if you experience something similar with your retired parent, or how do you create a balance.
I can't just believe this will happen to him so quickly when it was just 2020 I told him never to go to the village. Ohhh,  na cus you Dey ans am na why him Dey make such demands. Be like ur other siblings. Tell him you can rent just 1 bedroom, if he needs 3, he should add money. Na you Dey enable am 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by akube34: 1:28am On Jan 26 |
Mindlog:
If he must relocate back to the urban area, get him a "self-contain" apartment as he needs go through the phase of 'mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. I even pity am say 1 bedroom. Just imagine, person wey no Dey bring d money Dey demand 3 bedroom. I wonder how nice people are. Me, God forbid I succumb. It’s cus he knows this one pays attention na why him Dey demand |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by akube34: 1:31am On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
Thanks, I have decided on what to do. Thanks to everyone who gave meaningful thoughts. tell us |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by breadplanets(f): 7:13am On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
Only an irresponsible child would say this.
oya responsible child carry on and stop disturbing the irresponsible ones😁 2 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Jokerman(m): 3:24pm On Jan 26 |
Honestly dem put something for mouth to push your Dad to sell his Lagos house 😂😂😂..
I'm sorry though, but since he stays alone, you better rent mini or self con for him, and let him stay where is friends are..
Hope he doesn't drink too? |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Mike008(m): 3:26pm On Jan 26 |
This is a trivial matter. |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Munzy14(m): 3:26pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
The earlier you leave him and focus on yourself, the better for you. 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Lexusgs430: 3:27pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
You're encouraging and financing nonsense....... You go soon tire....... 😘😂😜 2 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by wellmax(m): 3:27pm On Jan 26 |
Op worries so much about "what will people say"
Better leave your life, so way you think is good and not worry about people's opinion 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by ChiefJusticeFuc: 3:29pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Biafra go sweet. |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by uche393: 3:30pm On Jan 26 |
this is the reason I don't believe that old age makes people wiser, if you want your life to be frustrated continue playing to your dads tune.
allow your dad to stay in the village, learn how to say no.
this kind of father won't even listen to his wife.
your papa sell him house, wetin he take the proceeds do ?
if I dey close to you, I will slap sense into you 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by ednut1(m): 3:30pm On Jan 26 |
Your cousins will mock you  It looks like you and your papa have same character. He does not need more than a one bed room. Give him what you can afford and look away. Your other siblings don look away heaven didn’t fall. 2 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by History555: 3:30pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Abandon him like your siblings. It's because you care that he is acting up. When you bone his side, he will wake up and act accordingly. 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by GloriousGbola: 3:31pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Imagine it was your pikin doing all of this. What would you do? Your dad is being irresponsible because you have shown him you will continue to bear the cost of his bad financial decisions You have done more than enough. However the caveat for me is na you and your dad know yaself. Maybe when you were younger your dad also let you get away with all sorts and now it is payback time. 2 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by vicoloni(m): 3:31pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Your story reminds me of one of the reasons traveling out of one’s birth country at least for visits is important. Americans for instance don’t think this way. In America children start paying rent once they’re 18 and not willing to go to university. Most children will put their elderly parents in homes. We go dey here when you bring your story of how your dad wrecked your marriage or finances. 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by updatedws: 3:31pm On Jan 26 |
don't have any advice for u.
I just wanted u to know u a good person. 1 Like |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by ChiefJusticeFuc: 3:32pm On Jan 26 |
This is why I support wholeheartedly the "out of Lagos " campaign by IPOB terrorists.
Let them return back to that place that chased them out in their youth.
Eye go clear for old man wey no gree get sense .
Foolish idiots that think they are doing us a favour . |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by mfm04622: 3:32pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
I need your input people.
3 years ago, my dad sold our house without informing anyone of us. Meanwhile, we all had things left at home, including my mum's items. He never told us where some of those things are till date.
He sold that house and went to the village, he immediately started having issues with the village people. Fight today, fight tomorrow. Everyone in the village I heard now disrespect him due to how he reveal his secrets to anyone who cares to listen.
My dad wants to leave the village to go rent an apartment in another state. His financial responsibility has been on me alone. My siblings abandoned him.
He's being nursing the idea of leaving the village and never informed me. Last november I spent almost 2 million naira fixing solar power and inverter for him in his house at the village and immediately after that he started saying he wants to leave the village..
I told my dad never to relocate to the village yet, that he should wait till his is older as he is still agile and all his friends are in the state where we lived or around. He also gets contracts once in a while so I don't bear much financial burden. But no, he failed to listen and sold our house and left.
My dad wants me to cough out another 1M to rent a house, he wants it big, 3 bedroom. I told him to look for a 2 bedroom but he said where would visitors stay.
I am not even comfortable seeing him in a rented apartment, what would my cousins say, they would mock us. I have some of them who are very naughty. He is bringing shame in us.
We have two properties and my husband wants him to come and stay in one, I vehemently disagreed because he will be controlling us, some of my extended family members will come visiting him and carry the news to the village, as well as discussing my own family and I don't want that. They contributed to what is happening to him now. Through him, some of them will come to stay and I can not start what I can't continue with. So I told my husband to dead that idea fast.
He wants to leave the village latest by February. How do I convince him to get a 2 bedroom flat? 3 bedroom would mean 3 mattresses, and everything triple. My dad doesn't like anything less. All the expenses will be on me alone. My siblings don't care.
I can't turn deaf ears to his needs. I don't want him in the village and I hate to see him in a rented apartment but that is what it is now.
I need contructive advice especially those of us with retired parents, how do you relate with their needs? I told him to think of a small trade so he won't be idle like he's been since retirement and he is talking about setting up electrical pole business, I laughed. Sebi he wan rek me. Same way he did not manage hid wealth.
Stand your ground!! As long as you are the one paying, tell him you can only afford 2 bedrooms for now! |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by ivolt: 3:32pm On Jan 26 |
AtoningBlood:
The money is long gone.
He started asking for money months after selling the house. Are you sure he wasn't duped of the sale proceeds? Or sold at massive discount due to external pressure? If he was not acting unstable before the sale incident, then something else might be going on. |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Realdeals(m): 3:33pm On Jan 26 |
Our House or His house? Learn to be firm with your decision, in as much you have pondered over it and convince that's the best step. I have learnt not to pity someone who is disobedient, I cannot inconvenient myself with anyone's irrational decisions after being warned. |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by RapportNaija(m): 3:34pm On Jan 26 |
What your cousins will say...what this that will say...
At your big age, ma?
What people will say is what's spurring you to take unreasonable actions? I'm ashamed on your behalf.
And for your inconsiderate dad, now's the time to act tough too - since it's your money you're spending.
Follow one advice I saw on the first page, buy a land and build 3-bed bungalow in your dad's choice of state/area.
That's better, you keep the documents too... So no need to be paying yearly rent. |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by ManOfSon: 3:35pm On Jan 26 |
You're pretty much behaving like your father - like father like daughter. What do you stand to gain bringing your family's private issues to a worldwide forum? What exactly? |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by MrHighSea: 3:35pm On Jan 26 |
rich people problem |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by OvertheTop(m): 3:36pm On Jan 26 |
TheBillyonaire:
From the points you raised, you have a good heart and also have the resources to expand your wealth. Whenever ever you experience constriction, do the opposite - Expand!
I know you mentioned that he wants 3-Bedroom Flat and wants to move in as early as February. Do not allow yourself to be manipulated. ASk him to be patient because you have a better plan for him.
Do some research on your State Capital or your Husband's Capital and and convince your husband to help out too because this is an opportunity to own a little more real real estate. Buy cheap land at the sub-urban that could be useful for you or your kids in the future and build a 3-Bedroom bungalow which he will move him and when he translates, the house is yours.
Ignore the idea of rent if you can afford to build a simple 3-Bedroom and tell him you are building a house for him, the news will restore his pride and yours and shut the lips of the naysayers and also buy him sometime to enjoy the village.
As for his Electric Pole business, it is a good idea, but he can start with Block Making business after the house is complete, there is a chance he can get back on his feet with it. HE WILL SELL IT AGAIN!!! 3 Likes |
| Re: Advise, My Father Sold His House And Moved To The Village Now He Wants To Leave by Harddiskng(m): 3:36pm On Jan 26 |
Someone sold his “House” and you are still sponsoring him?
Where is the proceed?
Oga ignore than man and live your life 1 Like 1 Share |
