Good evening nairalanders it's been a very long time, I'm really grateful for the solid attention I got concerning my cousin and her marital issues, we are doing fine regardless of this her husband has been calling and trying to get them back after noticing that the threats haven't been working, to think the problem we have In 9ja is family,who abandon you when you need them and after you try to mend your life they'll try to interfere and start telling you otherwise. Just because of their own personal benefits that they stand to receive from you or the person in question. Like I said before my extended family are trying to make plans for her to return back to the husband since her dad is late, and she doesn't have an elder brother to stand up for her except me of course from the mother side, now from what I noticed about the man he doesn't feel any remorse for what he has being doing, infant how can a man tell his wife that she is married to listen to him at all times anything he tells her to do she does,and she has actually been doing all these things but still yet nothing to show for the obedience rather it was now as if she is a slave because her opinion never counts in the home instead he will say she doesn't have sense to speak
Another issue is the gender discrimination when it comes to child bearing, which became like the major issue surrounding her, like say female children are not from God as well, to the extent he wouldn't be around when she gives birth,no attendance to the naming and dedication not like his work does not permit him but he doesn't show any sign of interest,comes back later to go and peep into the child's private to see whether it's a male or female. Now I don't know why they are also not taking his threats likely saying you will be the one to take her dead corpse home is not a mere word and the tongue has power...he promised to suffer her promax if she gives birth to another female then and he certainly did a good job at doing all he wanted to do, because even feeding money stopped plus she started seeing hell, insults and alm this while his family didn't even call to say congratulations for giving birth... The term "he will change" is now reoccurring, forgive is been used forgetting about the mental health of my cousin, saying she would never see happiness is marriage really an achievement I'm just coming back from work while hearing this nonsense talk. Already she doesn't even care if she gets married or not the lady is frightened people have noticed her fear, it's so obvious but because they don't want her to stay in the family house they are planning to let her go even encouraging her to go and get pregnant again 🤧 like I don't understand leaving this girl to cater for herself it's been my headache I'm not complaining at all, we're doing what we can and we're content. I have told them to let the man go and do what he wants already he's saying that if she doesn't come he would marry someone else,to give him a male child since she doesn't. I have told them to mind their business since they also added to what she's expericing right now when she was abandoned to cater for her siblings anyways the deed has been done already to me I know he doesn't deserve a second chance he just wants to carry out with out his remaining threats. It's better to save your life and cater for your children,than risk it because you want people to see you fulfilled as a woman and die to leave your kids without mercy 😩. Let her suffer now alive than dead, she's pleading not to go back and I totally accept her decision. Fellow nairalanders what are your honest advice for us at this point,it will really help us to plan some things because we are also here to learn thank you for your support we really appreciate.
Ahnie
Frozen70.
Kobojunkie.

Use human rights activists.

Try an office of any human rights organisation.

But if you think he will use money to buy the office over to his side, try Berekete Family or VDM.

Write up too clumsy

@Jozilinn

-How many children are between them?
-What are their ages?
-Which state is the husband based (where she used to live with him before she left)?

I strongly advise she doesn't go back if she doesn't want to.


Do not let a man treat you like trash because he feels you have no option, or the fear of society that you have left your husband's house.


Don't let her go back to endurance.

She's not the one who determines the sexes of a baby. The man is a maniac who only sees her as a baby delivering tool.

I wish you success.


She has a better life off his shackles and bondage.

Since she sees you as a big brother, kindly stand by her.

Those kinds of men never change until they kill sb's daughter. He doesn't respect her. And he doesn't deserve to be respect.


Let him lose what he has and regret it when it's lost.

Why are you asking this question? You don’t want her to go back and she doesn’t want to either so what exactly is the issue. What you both should be focusing on now is financial empowerment, avoid all other distractions.

Misery loves company and that’s why when some people are suffering or they see someone else enjoying, they will be looking for a way to convince the person to join them using different excuses. Hence, it is important to always know what you want and stand by it irrespective of others opinions.

Oga your sister doesn’t want to go, let her be.

Una no dey read wall handwriting ahbi, the man is tired of the relationship, he want out.

Let him be

The man is obviously tired of the marriage and will do anything to get rid of her.

Marriage shouldn't be a Do or die Affair, she should chose to be buried untimely as a MRS or stay alive for her kids.

If you allow your extended family to cajole her into going back to that death trap called marriage, then you've failed as her brother. Because obviously that unrepentant ba$tard of a husband is trying to lure her to come back and he'll finish her off.

Mindlog:
@Jozilinn

-How many children are between them?
-What are their ages?
-Which state is the husband based (where she used to live with him before she left)?

the kids are below 7 and 3 respectively ...and she was in the south south part of Nigeria there with him.

chatinent:
I strongly advise she doesn't go back if she doesn't want to.


Do not let a man treat you like trash because he feels you have no option, or the fear of society that you have left your husband's house.


Don't let her go back to endurance.

She's not the one who determines the sexes of a baby. The man is a maniac who only sees her as a baby delivering tool.

I wish you success.


She has a better life off his shackles and bondage.

Since she sees you as a big brother, kindly stand by her.

Those kinds of men never change until they kill sb's daughter. He doesn't respect her. And he doesn't deserve to be respect.


Let him lose what he has and regret it when it's lost.

Thank you dear I really appreciate

Such a lovely brother.

Jozilinn:
the kids are below 7 and 3 respectively ...and she was in the south south part of Nigeria there with him.

She shouldn't go back to a death trap called marriage nor even think of getting pregnant for him again, hoping to birth a boy....red flags rarely turn green.

She should approach any of the welfare office in their state of residence, for them to facilitate co-parenting and him, making provisions for the children and possible visitations.

End of marriage, is not end of life.....let her refocus, there is so much to look forward to without that dark cloud of toxic marriage, hovering over her.

Jozilinn:
the kids are below 7 and 3 respectively ...and she was in the south south part of Nigeria there with him.

she should forget about him and move on with her life. She shouldn't go back to him o. Get human rights lawyer to mandate him pay for their upkeep and school fees

UnfairLife7:
she should forget about him and move on with her life. She shouldn't go back to him o. Get human rights lawyer to mandate him pay for their upkeep and school fees

thank you 🙏

UnfairLife7:
she should forget about him and move on with her life. She shouldn't go back to him o. Get human rights lawyer to mandate him pay for their upkeep and school fees

Thank you 🙏