Haba flow no update since, kilode now? Abeg update o

After i had smoked three Jumbo wraps, i walked home with my guys. Sorry, I didn't walk but flew home, because i was on top of the world, flying on eagles wings.

As i continued walking, i heard a voice spoke to me, I turned, and it wasn't any of my guys that spoke. Yet another voice spoke.

The two voices now spoke together clearly for me to hear. The following conversation ensued between myself and the two voices:

"na me be Tramadol" the first voice said, "my name na Igboh" the second voice said. "my own name na Flow" i responded to the two voices without my mouth moving.

Tramadol: Remove ur shirt.
Flow: why i go remove my shirt?
Igboh: because u be big boy.
Flow: i be big boy na, and i go remove am to show u say i be big boy.

So i removed my shirt and singlet. I turned and saw that Man, Snoop, Tupac, and Bigie were carried away by the football argument they were involved in. So they weren't disturbing the conversation with my newly found invisible friends.

Tramadol: pull ur trouser
Flow: why i go pull my trouser?
Igboh: because u be president of Nigeria.
Flow: i no go pull am abeg, i no wear boxers inside, u want make people dey see my p'rick?
Tramadol: ok go control that traffic for there.

I glanced at the road and saw that there was no traffic jam, but all the cars were moving on high speed.

Flow: but hold-up no dey na.
Igboh: Just go control am like dat, dem go dash u money.
Flow: ok i go go.

I sheepishly walked to the direction of the road to go control the traffic. I saw from the corner of my eyes that my guys were still arguing football so they never saw me leaving.

"hey you!! Stop there!! Hey you! move!!" i commanded as i stood in the middle of the road. The car i commanded to stop didn't stop but tried to catch break, so it made a loud screech as it headed to my direction. I tot it had failed break.

For few seconds i found myself in the spirit world sipping hennesey with Tupac shakur. "i don die be dat oh" i tot.

What confirmed i wasn't dead was when Man shouted, "Flow that motor for kill u oh!!".

flow weytin dey happen nah....no dulls oh i beg.men dey wait for ur update.

Ehm... Flow... Your ability to update regularly endeared many people to you but this one that you have turned to a one update man is risky o... Don't turn to me ooo...

kelvin1191: I almost joined the black brothers movement when i was in sch. But why i didn't joinwas because, guys in that cult were mostly robbers. Some were pilferers, others were pick pockets, while some others had matured to becomehighway robbers...

*****************Flow1759, u lost d respect i av 4 u immediately i saw this ur statement above. Baggas and , who stole better? Which av d highest numba of robbers, thugs and pick-pocket? What is d motto of ur frat cos it says what u guys are. In ur last thread, (ibo boy wey like yoruba) u said dat u ar XYZ and that u ar now a changed man but ur write up still show dat ur ar still a "Boyscout".When men ar leaving frat to reality, u ar here trying to score cheap point to Baggas. Mtcheeew!

na people like una no dey get mind. Must all members all over nigeria be robbers? I am giving u my own account of members, mind u i had so many of dem as friends way back then, so i owe u no apology. Mr , na ur papa get the cult? When i play frat things people like u still dey sec sch.

Foxy_Ultimate: Ehm... Flow... Your ability to update regularly endeared many people to you but this one that you have turned to a one update man is risky o... Don't turn to me ooo...

am very sorry, i will do my best to improve. Ur PHCN brothers refuse giving us light and my gen is under repairs.

valboy20:

who b dix 1? who brought u outta ya cave cox m sure u a cyclop...u gat 1 eye thux attributin 2 ya comment

if u sabi read, u suppose decipher that ''man wey dey reason'' story hapened b4 ''ibo boy wey lyk yoruba'' nt mindin dat it came last

he told us hex nw a changed man in his last story, u shudnt av doubted him cox dix story hapnd b4 d last one.

*******USE YA HEAD BRO******

guy u get tym dey explain 2 dat idiot wey him brain don lost 4 jungle.
Anybody wey no like wetin him dey read abeg just waka pass.
Flow abeg,nothing do u jare.ride on.

Where i dey since nw Where i dey since nw

We no b dia MATE. abeg baba flow ryde on

Mr Flow! Nice one... But, you're really slow these days O.
It's kinda dulling.

"Baba Jay who buy dis Bread and Akara wey una dey chop?" Snoop asked as we got home. "na Brainbox oh" Baba jay responded. Man looked at the direction of Brainbox and said, "Brainbox why u wear my trouser na?". "No vex i go soon pull am" Brainbox responded.
Brainbox loved spoiling other peoples things and saving his own, i hated him for that because he had spoilt so many of my things when we were at Umunkoto.


"MOG is Pkc not coming back tonight?" Snoop asked. "Yes oh, he will be sleeping in the church because he will be leading the early morning prayers tommorow" MOG responded.

The first night i slept in the church, i concluded that the mosquitoes there were "Holy mosquitoes". If you are an unbeliever and you sleep in the church for a night, the next morning you would surely give your life to Christ.

The mosquitoes can sting the living daylight off you. The first night i slept there with Pkc and my cousin Tochiba, i cried althrough the night. They gave me a "per seconds billing" stinging, and the next morning my skin was swollen. But i wondered why Pkc still loved sleeping there, or were the mosquitoes tired of his blood?.

"something is smelling like indian h'emp here, do any of you smoke?" MOG inquired. "No oh, na that Flow perfume wey all of us spray oh, the perfume dey smell like Igboh" Man told a fat lie. One thing i loved Man for was that you can't just throw him off guard, he had a response to every question from his arsenal of lies. He should have been called "LIEnus" instead of "Man". "no, i am sure somebody smoked amongst you guys, i sense the smell once someone that just smoked comes around me" MOG said. "but how do you know?" Brainbox asked.

"dis Brainbox no get sense oh, see the kin question wey him dey ask, if MOG com say him wan smell our mouth nkor? Brainbox na because u no dey smoke nahim make u wan cast us abi?" I tot.

"how wont i know, don't u know before i gave my life to Christ, i was the number one Man of in Poly Nekede where i schooled, i smoked more than chimney, i was a chain smoker, so if i come across a weed smooker i could tell by just smelling the person's cloth" MOG narrated. One hearing that, i saw Snoop moved his body a bit in other for MOG's weed sensitive nose not to percieve the smell of weed emanating from his cloth, Man also did the same. But i did not move my body because i wasn't putting on my cloth, "abi him dey smell person skin sef?" i asked myself.

"that person that smokes, pls change ur ways oh, Jesus Loves u, i pray God arrest you soon, In Jesus name" MOG prayed. "AMEN!!!" we all chorused.

Every pastor is always a former number one!
Why do they like claiming that? Like they are still looking for some street cred or something?
Bullshytters!

Flow i dey feel you oh!...

kwangi: Mr Flow! Nice one... But, you're really slow these days O.
It's kinda dulling.

i have changed my ways. I will do my best. Btw don't u guys think its high time we hit the front page? Somebody should pls suggest it to cuddlemii with the link. Thanks

kwangi: Every pastor is always a former number one!
Why do they like claiming that? Like they are still looking for some street cred or something?
Bullshytters!

we are all once sinners

flow1759:

i have changed my ways. I will do my best. Btw don't u guys think its high time we hit the front page? Somebody should pls suggest it to cuddlemii with the link. Thanks

Suggested.

chinedumo: we are all once sinners

Lol... That's not my point.
My point is, the MOG guy is lying!

Next morning, as early as 8am man woke me up. And he told me we should start preparing for work. I woke Brainbox also. The others were still sleeping.


"we no go chop before we go?" Brainbox asked. "no worry we go chop vegetable soup for Mama Calabar place" Man responded. "who be Mama calabar?" Brainbox asked. "when we reach there u go see her" Man answered(his usual way of answering such question).


Why i so much liked Mama Calabar canteen was because the place was neat. Not only that, because that was the canteen most kponkpon workers ate their breakfast. "mehn! Calabar women sabi cook oh, i must marry Calabar woman oh" i concluded as i munched my kingsize meat.


Mama Calabar canteen wasn't far from our "place of work", so we walked down gulping our sachet water, like the ghetto boys we were.


"e get one old man wey i want make we go see, him name na Old solja, nahim be security man for dis site for night, na him hand key to where dem dey put cement dey dey, but as him no dey around dat yesterday him give me the key day before yesterday make i hold am, but him call me dis morning say him don come back, so make we go greet am because that man dey help me well well, na him house i dey go drink water sometimes sef, him house no far from here" Man explained.


"Old Solja good morning" we chorused as we got to the shanty house. "unu morning" he responded. "unu come to work?" Old Solja asked, "yes Sir" Man answered. "unu Madam never come?" he asked again, "yes sir, she never come, so we say make we come greet you na" Man responded. "unu don try as unu come, make unu sidon na" Old Solja said offering us seat. I wondered why he replaced "una" with "unu". Infact i lost count of how many times he mentioned the word "unu" for the five minutes we stood in front of his house. The "unu" was becoming a rhyme. "no Old Solja, no worry we go soon go sef, our Madam go soon come, this na my two friends, this one name na Flow, dis one name na Brainbox, i come show dem to you" Man added.


"ok unu don dey go?" Old solja asked, "we don dey go sir" our spokesMAN responded. "únú n'gbàmbo" Old solja mentioned the word "unu" again but this time in Ibo.

[quote author=4kizo]We no b dia MATE. abeg baba flow ryde on.
Wida?

kwangi: Lol... That's not my point.
My point is, the MOG guy is lying!

how u take know?

Kudos......more

Flow unu no continue ds thing b4 i but unu pri.ck 4 u abi?

chinedumo:

how u take know?

I said it all in the first post.

kwangi: I said it all in the first post.

guy go sleep oh ! Abeg lock this door before you go ... Then appoint person wey go sweep tomorrow

flow keep flowing we dey with u kampe....more!!!

Flow...unu get mouth lyk kettle...mur tramadol 4 unu weak body...lol

Flow ur story is becoming to short for my likeness.you are hero here and don't misuse it.your punishment is to write not let than 5million word per hour.Gracie dalu.more fuel on your Gen Amen

Gud a m guys. Flow oya type

[quote author=c0ast0l][/quote]R we lyk dat

flow1759:
Tramadol: ok go control that traffic for there.

This part got me laughing uncontrollably.... Bless yhu flow for the free laugh.. More power to yhur elbow.

Flow! Don't you think your fans should have gotten a new update by now. It's almost mid-day!
And tell us how many updates we should be expecting in a day.
I say three updates per day... Abi wetin you think?